What's it like to be cannon fodder?

My heart is sour, thinking that I can meet a trustworthy friend in my life and want to treat it with a more sincere attitude. Unexpectedly, when you recall what happened before and after, you suddenly realize, oh, so that's it, and immediately there will be a feeling filled with my heart. This feeling is the feeling of being used. At first, I felt very uncomfortable. How come... Think again, especially. They did it for a reason. That's just a strategy for him to achieve his goal. I just acted as an outlet when he was in a bad mood. What happened? What I learned from a pit strengthened my determination to meet someone. I made a abnormal decision, that is, to leave this troubled place and stay away from this scholar. Today, when you see through all this, the answer is no! Anyone with a little thinking ability will think so, and so will I. Don't want to say too much, just be clear in your heart. This is a kind of growth. Will such a foolish thing happen again in the future? I don't think there will be any more. Maybe that's it. I'm mature, I'm promoted, I'm studying again, but I'm sincere. Very sad, a little, like the feeling of lovelorn, faint, as if nothing had happened.