Long-term "spiritual internal friction", how to let yourself go?

Seeing this question, I think I have to answer it, because I used to be "internal consumption and cost loss" and I used to struggle with it, but now I have come out.

Before talking about how to solve this situation, I'd better explain to you what mental internal friction is, so as not to confuse internal friction with introversion. "Spiritual internal friction" refers to a person's mind struggling repeatedly for one thing, but unable to make up his mind, or very dissatisfied with his current situation but powerless, and constantly consuming his energy at the spiritual level. Introversion refers to being unwilling or afraid to communicate with others, having strong self-esteem and being particularly shy.

Next, let's get down to business and talk about how to "let yourself go" in the face of long-term mental internal friction.

First, we should cultivate our hobbies, and then set practical goals for ourselves. Some people are unhappy because their strong desires are not satisfied, and they constantly deny themselves at the spiritual level and fall into deep spiritual internal friction.

Just like myself, I was not satisfied with my stable job before, and I was bent on making big money by starting a business. But in fact, I not only don't have enough money, but also have no mind to do business, so I often blame myself, complain about my incompetence and deny myself. This made me suffer for a long time, and the whole state became worse.

Later, I realized that this was not the case, so I began to cultivate my interest and set some goals that were not so difficult to achieve. Surprisingly, when I achieve these goals, I can get a great sense of accomplishment and happiness, which has gradually changed a state of internal friction.

The second is to lower expectations of things. Everyone is eager for their efforts to be rewarded, but is it possible? Obviously, this is impossible. Many times, we can't get a proportional return for our efforts.

I did something very hard before, and I did it, but I didn't get the promise from the leader. At this time, you can only learn to adjust yourself, in the spirit of "doing your best and resigned". Don't be eager for feedback. If you can get something, it will really make people happy, but if not, you can only relax.

Finally, do things decisively. Sometimes it doesn't matter if you are wrong, learn to accept that imperfect self. As the saying goes, "no one is perfect", who can't make mistakes! If you are wrong, we should learn from it and avoid making similar mistakes next time. Don't hold on to a mistake, or you will live a very tired life.

In addition, when we do things, we should be indecisive and think repeatedly. Sometimes it will not help you make a correct judgment, but will keep you away from the "truth". This is like saying that I originally wanted to go to university to study for on-the-job graduate students, but considering the problems of funds and time, I struggled for a long time and didn't make a decision. As a result, the school refused to recruit in the end, and I missed the chance of promotion later.

In fact, if we want to solve the mental internal friction, we basically look at these three aspects, mainly to see if you can think like this and implement it like this. I hope everyone with mental internal friction can get out of this predicament.