A funny sentence 49 classic quotations _ Although the bird is small, it plays around the whole sky.

1. It's very safe for a ship to dock at the port, but that's not the purpose of shipbuilding.

We will know about tomorrow the day after tomorrow.

3, people are fighting for a sigh of relief, but what they force out is a piece of shit!

4. Goose, cut the curve with a knife, pluck the hair and add water, ignite and cover the pot.

5. The poor monk came from the Eastern Tang Dynasty and made a special trip to the Western Heaven to worship Buddha and find relatives.

6. I am naturally useful, and the mouse son can make holes.

7. As long as the heart is willing to climb, there is no unattainable height. You can't miss yourself, you can't take care of yourself in pain, you can't take care of yourself in the result, you can't give yourself happiness.

8. The ship can temporarily berth, but the sail can't stop choosing the direction.

9. I've been really busy recently, and it's hard to get enough sleep for one day 16 hours.

10, there are no white pies in the sky, only white bricks.

1 1, as long as the kung fu is deep, the husband and wife will be grateful for a hundred days.

12, dreams are always awakened by urine!

13, life is too hard. In order to master one more eating skill, I am practicing using chopsticks with my left hand.

14, I have a basket of wishes, but I can't wait for a meteor.

15. How high is your turnover rate?

16, no one can take your place in my heart, because you have no place in my heart at all.

17, it is forbidden to urinate here, and the tools will be confiscated.

18, three tadpoles go to the restaurant to eat. When the waiter brought a plate of braised bullfrog to the next table, three tadpoles hugged each other and sang sadly: I don't want to grow up.

19, don't dig Lao Tzu's grave. I think in those days, Lao Tzu was also a grave robber.

20. Life is like a coffee table. Although it is not big, it is full of tragedy. ......

2 1, don't steam steamed bread for breath, even if there is no QQ coin.

22. If I don't hit you, you won't know that I am both civil and military.

23, loneliness is that someone is talking and no one is listening; You have nothing to say when someone is listening.

I don't care if you don't love me. There are many beautiful women in the world, and she will be gentler than you!

25. People like me who have no knowledge and education can only be proprietress in the future!

26. I never hold grudges. Usually I report my grievances on the spot.

27. In the workplace, you should be like Conan. There is a domineering eldest brother who lets others die wherever he goes. Is your nickname Gao Qiu? I'm completely pissed off by you! .

28. We are all dreamers. When dreams are gone, only dreamers are left.

29. As long as people are separated, people who are familiar with each other will gradually alienate.

30. It turns out that Cherry Maruko fell in love with watermelon taro, because their hairstyles are lovers'.

3 1, guns, drums, I am a rogue, who am I afraid of!

Sleep is an art, and no one can stop me from pursuing it.

As long as you live better than me, I can't stand it.

I want to have a good rest during the day, because I want to sleep at night!

35, I am 23 years old, everyone loves me, flowers bloom and flowers fall, and cars have a flat tire! Every time I walk down the street, either a handsome guy turns around or a beautiful woman jumps off a building!

36. People who follow me are good, but those who oppose me are depraved!

37. Do you like my angel's face or the devil's figure? I like your sense of humor.

38. The existence of tears proves that sadness is not an illusion.

39. People live every day just to prepare for death!

4 1, blue curtains, glass-like heart, transparent to you, but easy to be sad.

42. I subvert the whole world just to straighten your reflection.

43. There are no windtight walls and no hanging beams.

44.a: Sister, if someone hurts you, how long will you forgive him? B: It's God's business to forgive her. My task is to send her to God.

45. Since SDB launched that intellectual advertising slogan, people in the banking industry have compiled a more intellectual companion piece: Everbright is not enough.

46, three good students-good study, good looks, good family. No students-no grades, no looks, no background.

Although the bird is small, it plays all over the sky.

You have the right to remain silent, but everything you say will be your last words.

49. I bought an exquisite watch, but the time is still so boring.

29 funny classic quotations in one sentence

1, poor foundation, even if you pay more money, you are also a fairy, you are still a toad!

We will know about tomorrow the day after tomorrow.

3, grandstanding, you are not qualified; Play dumb, you have gone too far!

4. If you don't degenerate in debauchery, you will degenerate in silence.

The third person is not the later one, but the one who doesn't love deeply.

6. Those who are not afraid of debt collection are heroes, and those who are afraid of debt are really poor.

7. I only drink pure water when drinking water and pure milk when drinking milk, so I am very simple.

8. Don't dig Lao Tzu's grave. I thought I was a grave robber, too.

9. Don't mess with me, or I'll let you die rhythmically.

10, ugly, it's not your fault; Ugly and show off in an ostentatious manner everywhere, sister, I was wrong!

1 1, this person's appearance and internal pixels are relatively low.

12, when you put on your wedding dress, I also put on the cassock.

13, brother is not Baidu, don't ask me everything!

14, I am not wrong, but I have never been right!

15, why should a good grain of rice spoil a pot of mouse excrement?

16, I hate that my surname is not Li, and I hate that my father is not straight.

17, don't give Colby muscles, my family raises chickens!

18, as long as the kung fu is deep, the shit is serious.

19, it's all boiled water. What do you pack?

20. Hard life needs no explanation!

2 1, he is a pig who doesn't read, but a literate pig who reads.

22. It's not that the ending of the story is not good enough, but that we are too demanding of the story!

23. Wear other people's shoes and take other people's roads, so that others can neither find shoes nor find their way.

24. When I said I couldn't afford to be hurt, it was the day when your house caught fire.

25, don't always say that I am fat, I am afraid that if I lose weight, you will not be able to stop.

26. Isn't there half a cucumber in the refrigerator? Go and fry four dishes for the children.

27. How many worries you can have is like a group of eunuchs going to a brothel.

28. I was also the seed of infatuation, and I drowned in the rain.

29, our love, the doctor said: he has tried his best.

A funny classic quotation

The latest sentence is a funny classic quotation.

1. I'd rather you hold another woman and miss me than you hold me and miss another woman.

2.2. There are many on QQ, which penguins have not seen?

3. Laying hens, cockfighting among cocks.

I'm not afraid of beautiful women treating me like a pervert, but I'm afraid of ugly women treating me like a hooligan.

5. People are heartless and unstable! People are not damaged, not standard! People are not bad, they die quickly.

You'd better let me kneel on the washboard. Kneeling on the electric heater is unbearable.

7. Oh, my God! My clothes have lost weight again.

8. Is the leaf leaving because of the pursuit of the wind or the persistence of the tree?

9. Nonsense is the first sentence in interpersonal relationship.

10. To be or not to be.

1 1. Men study for Ph.D. because of low IQ, while women study for Ph.D. because of low EQ.

12. It's not necessarily monks who burn incense, but pandas!

13. Who said I was white, thin and beautiful ~ I will be good friends with him.

14. People are not smart, and they are as bald as others! !

15. If you can't shit on one foot, then you are innocent!

16. I admire myself-I found my girlfriend who broke up with me 12 years through Google!

17. The most shameful thing is to discuss salary with several classmates. I thought they were talking about annual salary, but later I found out that it was all monthly salary …

18. I won't tell you if I kill you.

19. Nothing money can solve is a problem.

20. after studying for more than ten years, it is better to mix in kindergarten!

2 1. Even believe in advertisements. You must be stupid to study!

22. No matter how difficult it is, consider yourself 250. No matter how difficult it is, consider yourself a two-faced person.

23. Only when I reached the top of the mountain did I find that the wrong road and the right road were only a few steps away.

24. Optimists see opportunities in disasters, while pessimists see disasters in opportunities.

25. Being angry is to punish yourself with other people's mistakes.

26. I'm not nice to you without money and power. Can you follow me?

27. Go to Google Baidu.

28. It is better to fight the wise than to talk to someone!

29. A big woman can't have no electricity for a day, and a little woman can't have no money for a day!

30. It's not that I don't laugh, but it makes me laugh-_-!

3 1. Youth is dedicated to the house and middle age to the children.

32. There are two ways to cheat: one is a cheat sheet copied on paper, which may be found out and the result is to drop out of school; The other is a cheat sheet copied in my mind, and I can't find it. As a result, I got a scholarship.

When she was a child, her parents always believed that the ugly duckling would turn into a white swan at the age of eighteen! One day when she grew up, her father looked at her intently, and then said seriously, "Son, you'd better study hard ..."

34. In high school, the class teacher often enlightened me and said, "So many beautiful women cross the river. Now you just need to weave a net! " After being admitted to Tsinghua, I want to play with his glass with monkey rubber bands …

35. Anyone who kisses madly in front of the teaching building of the cafeteria study room can't afford a house!

After graduation, I had nothing to do, so I went to Massachusetts to dig for oil. Later, it was really dug, and the oil quality was too good to be purified! Two years later, Mobil oil company sued us, saying that we dug his oil pipeline …

37. Find a big job after graduation and earn 300,000 yuan after graduation. Look at the drawings and build a 40-meter chimney. It's all covered up, and people beat me at a glance! Shit, the drawings are down, and people want to dig wells …

38. After four years of college, no girl asked me for directions. Today, I drove my BMW back to my alma mater for the first time to do something. As a result, five girls came to ask for directions in a short time …

39. I always wander between cow A and cow C.

40. I want to see the moon, but it shines on the ditch.

4 1. I am the most normal among abnormal people and the most abnormal among normal people.

42. Is the blank white?

I don't usually dump ugly girls, but you are an exception.

44. There is no rehearsal in life, and every day is live broadcast.

45. If the son doesn't listen, he can fight appropriately, otherwise he won't show the majesty of Lao Tzu, as in Taiwan Province Province.

46. Nothing is meanest, only meaner.

47. There are two ways to pollute a place: garbage or money!

48. The perfect figure is also a teasing material in the eyes of people who don't love her.

49. A small tree can't grow without pruning; Children can't grow up without pruning.

50. Long-term accumulation may lead to outbreaks; And if it breaks out for a long time, it may lead to collapse.

5 1. Be respectful to superiors, boss around subordinates, and hide from peers.

52. After a few decades, we will meet again and send them to the crematorium. All of them will be burned to ashes, one for you and one for me, and all of them will be sent to the countryside to be used as fertilizer.

53. Take a newspaper to the toilet. I am a scholar.

If I want to sweep the floor, I will never wash the dishes. If I want to wash the dishes, I will never sweep the floor. Both? You think I'm an alien!

I will come to you in my next life, because you are the stupidest person except me.

56. When arguing, the difference between a man and a woman is like the difference between a rifle and a machine gun.

Grandpa comes from his grandson. ...

58. Women have countless QQ numbers just to flirt with a man. Men often use a QQ number to fill in all kinds of women …

59. Don't be afraid of enemies like tigers, but teammates like pigs!

60. When the bank charges, it says, "This is in line with international practice." When he was in service, he said, "We should consider China's national conditions."

6 1. Don't ask me for anything, let alone anything.

Angels can fly because they look down on themselves …

63. Hugging is really a strange thing. When we get so close, we can't see each other's faces.

64. House prices are getting higher and higher, and there are fewer and fewer good men …

65. How to give MM an unforgettable birthday? Beat her up first, and then send the house certificate of the most expensive property in Guangzhou, which will be an unforgettable surprise!

66. My wife has been praising me for being lewd since she saw some photos of my girlfriend in college.

67. I spent 80,000 yuan on a pottery jar from the Western Zhou Dynasty. I went to Jianbao column for appraisal yesterday. The expert said seriously, "Which one of these is from the Western Zhou Dynasty?" This is from last week! "

68. I can't stand this kind of business-the sign says: tear it down, pay it, sell it! I threw her 5 yuan to buy a down jacket, but she wouldn't sell it. It's too deceiving consumers!

69. When I was a child, I was not sensible and often took mm shopping, which hurt a lot of MM; I don't pull it now, but I didn't expect it to hurt …

70. Handsome is useless! Finally, I was eaten by a chess piece!

7 1. Nobody knows what just happened. I'm used to covering everything up with a smile …

72. In the days when there are no women, I enjoy flirting with men …

73. Women will give up their careers for their feelings, and men will give up their feelings for their careers; Women will be moved by men who give up their careers for their feelings, but they will be with men who give up their feelings for their careers!

74. A woman is like a book on the shelf. Although you bought her, before you bought her, she was more or less turned over by several men …

75. Now it seems that movies that can be understood with an IQ of 30 are the most popular, and 80% of people who like these movies like watching Korean dramas!

76. Today is 3. 14, Pi Festival, so I want to eat pie ~

77. Korean scholars believe that the Monkey King is actually a Korean fairy, because he used a stick!

78. An employee of Huawei was arrested by the police for whoring in Matishan, which became the company's annual scandal. Reason for dismissal: going to such a cheap place will make the company lose face!

79. My brother described the hygiene of his dormitory like this-"I don't want to open my eyes when I go back to the dormitory! ! ! "

80. Tsinghua University is also called "Frog University"-when you talk while eating steamed buns …

8 1. When I first entered the university, I was too weak to step on an ant. After graduation, I became a ruthless killer, trained by those who crawled in my rice bowl and flew in the canteen bowl …

82. How to lose weight if you don't have enough to eat?

83. The goal was scored by the goalkeeper.

84. Praise a female classmate in person: You are really a lotus flower! !

85.how did you die? Not so poor as to die.

86. There is a one-dollar coin in the flower bed, but the sign next to the flower bed says, "Step into the flower bed and be fined three yuan!" " It's really embarrassing.

87. If you look in the mirror and pay taxes, I'm afraid some women will go bankrupt.

88. A man wants to divorce his wife after making money, but he can't make money and his wife wants to divorce him.

89. Men's affairs are reflected in busier work, while women's affairs are reflected in pickles.

90. A woman says "hate" to you, which means she likes you. When a man says "hate" to you, he really hates you.

9 1. Traditional men are pure before marriage and start screwing around after marriage; Modern men fool around before marriage and become honest after marriage.

92. No matter how bad the relationship between a man and his wife is, the relationship with his mother-in-law is also good; No matter how good the relationship between a woman and her husband is, the relationship with her mother-in-law is also poor.

93. Men don't make money, women are anxious, and men make money and women regret it.

94. A man entrusts his girlfriend to his buddy for care, and finally his girlfriend becomes his buddy's wife and the buddy takes care of him; A woman entrusted her boyfriend to her sisters for care, and as a result, her sisters became her boyfriend's wife and could not be her.

95. I can't find my tie again Didn't you find a rag yesterday?

96. None of the women who participated in the beauty pageant can find a good man, because all the good men are married, such as me.

97. I can't help smoking at the thought of the reunification of the motherland …

98. If I become an emperor, I will make you a prince!

99. Roses are very cheap. You can give them to your wife.

100. As long as the hoe jumps well, there is a corner that cannot be dug down?

In short, the classic quotations are very funny.

1, I like children, and I like the process of being a child! 2. The art of self-cultivation is actually the art of lying.

It is the most basic responsibility and obligation of men to turn girls into women.

Chastity varies from person to person. For example, people will praise a girl as a virgin, but they will also laugh at a boy as a virgin.

5, don't be coquettish, just touch the world with lewdness.

6, spring is not called out, it is a real knife!

7. It is better to have a virgin in China than in Japan.

8, no money, no power, no longer good to you, can you follow me?

Honey, I'm pregnant for three months, but don't worry, it's not yours, and you're not responsible.

10, as the saying goes: laugh and the whole world laughs with you; You cried. You are the only one crying in the world.

1 1. There are so many people who despise me. Who are you?

12, pregnancy is like pregnancy. It takes a long time for people to see it.

13, if you can't put a wedding dress on your woman, don't stop you from unbuttoning her clothes!

14, I don't like sleeping with only one woman many times, but I like sleeping with many women only once.

15, men are not drunk, how can women have tips; How can a man have a chance if a woman is not drunk? Women and men are not drunk, and no one sleeps in the hotel.

16, a girl from a virgin to a woman only needs to succeed once, and a boy from a virgin to a man needs repeated tempering. !

17, the lover will eventually become an animal. If you don't fuck her today, she will let someone else fuck her tomorrow!

18, give me a boat full of women, I can call myself a ghost!

19, beheading was nothing, and a scar the size of a bowl fell on my head. 18 later, I was a zombie again.

20. My dream: I have something to do as a secretary and nothing to do as a secretary. The reality is that the secretary can't do it, and the secretary can't do anything.

2 1, men are walking genitals!

22. Don't say that others are mentally ill. The premise of having a brain is that you must have a brain.

23, the star can be more famous if he takes off a little, but I was caught naked!

24. When you see a beautiful woman, touch your pocket first to see if you have any money!

25. If I become a star one day, I will definitely show it to you!

26, people are not afraid of death, the most afraid of is not knowing life!

27. I am like a fly lying on the glass. I have a bright future, but I can't find a way out

28. If one day I become a hooligan, please tell others that I am innocent.

Lack of social experience means lack of exercise.

30. People always make mistakes, otherwise the right road will be crowded.

3 1, man, upper body is cultivation, lower body is essence; Women, the upper body is the bait, and the lower body is the trap.

32. Being single is painful, and being single for a long time is even more painful. I saw a sow the other day. I think its eyes are very good.

33. Hag: Nothing to kill. Romance: Nothing. Find a beautiful woman to sleep with. Rich man: nothing to buy a new car to drive. Me: Nothing. Pick up a cigarette and smoke it.

34. I changed her from a girl to a woman; She turned me from a boy into a poor man.

35. A beautiful, pure, gentle, sexy and lovely virgin is like a ghost. Men are talking about it, but no one has ever seen it.

36, milk is not necessarily a mother, money must be a grandfather!

37. I am an animal when I take off my clothes, and I am the devil wears Prada when I put on my clothes!

38. There are two ways to pollute a place: garbage or money!

39. You are really creative and have the courage to live!

40. People always make mistakes, otherwise the right road will be crowded.