Showing off funny mood phrases.

1, think about the salary ratio, forget it, don't want to live.

2. You asked me if I had any religious beliefs, and I said, Does narcissism count?

3, children, stupid people can not be resurrected.

Don't mess with me, or I'll let you die rhythmically.

You have the right to remain silent, but we will shut you up soon. Humorous catchwords

6. Now you scold me because you don't know me yet, and you will know me later. You will definitely hit me.

7. The whole school stopped water for two days. The next day, I found that there were not many girls in my class.

8. The teacher's biggest lie is that we don't have a rest between classes, and finish class later and earlier.

9. Some people are as smart as the weather and changeable; Some people are as stupid as the weather forecast, and they can't tell when the weather changes.

10, you are too short! Let me borrow your telescope to see more clearly. Am I not handsome?

1 1, if this is not love, then I would rather sell cabbage.

12, I am a mute, and I usually speak in disguise.

13, I can't stand up straight until you give me a gift.

14, don't look back, I only love your back.

15, memories in the traces of years, precipitated a good-looking look.

16, others always see us holding hands happily. In fact, the truth is that once I let go, she will go shopping.

17, someone actually painted me with blue eye shadow, which is an insult to my dark circles!

19, don't challenge my password with your Trojan horse.

20. I am not ugly, but I am not prepared to be gentle.

2 1, with a grain of salt, it is the sea that loses his temper.

22. Although he came to Ann, he was gentle and neat, and he couldn't see the elegance of Qin figurines at all.

23. When time and patience are luxuries, we can only get to know each other through horoscopes.

24. Do math problems today. There are ten people waiting in line. A can't stand in the middle, at both ends, next to B. Besides C, there is Ding behind them. After heated discussion, everyone agreed to let A go ~

25. A buddy posted on the Internet that someone should help me get a screen name. The requirement is that the name should be noble and elegant, and it is best to have a classical charm, with a sadness and a touch of bitterness. Many netizens offered suggestions, and finally everyone supported a name: Aisingiorro dysmenorrhea.

Interesting mood phrases

1, take the newspaper to the toilet, I am a scholar. I love myself only because I want you to like me.

I want to live until the end of the news broadcast.

4, others laugh at me for wearing thick clothes, and I laugh at others for freezing.

In order to be a civil servant, I gave birth to a leader's son.

6. It's hard to love someone, but it's easy to give up someone.

7. You made me understand that secret love turned out to be such a thing.

8, since I got mental illness, my spirit is much better!

9. I heard that you are rich and you still recognize Jiro as your master.

10, I will only remember those who have been petting and hurting me?

1 1, you are not a VIp, not even a v, you are just a p.

12, people who secretly love me, how can you be so calm!

13, women are easy to be satisfied, and it is easy for you to stumble.

14, what is love in the world? The sage replied: waste.

15. Life is too short to be with interesting people, such as me.

There are so many life guides all over the country, but I am in The Journey to the West.

17, I have been mixing until now, I can afford it, and only chopsticks can put it down.

18, you said we would grow old together, but you secretly baked oil.

19, a handsome man like me will always be found out by the teacher when he is absent from class.

As long as someone respects me, I begin to doubt human dignity.

2 1, children's shoes, if you see an egg, throw them an egg.

22. The season of black stockings flooding makes these thick legs feel awkward.

23. If being rich is a mistake, I'd rather make it again.

24. When you don't reply to my messages, I feel that you are in Uniqlo.

25. You are my temperate maritime climate, always warm.

26. Be a carefree foodie and a carefree fool.

27. If one day I fall down. Remember, I'll come up for you.

28. We are old if we are not crazy, and we are crazy if you are not old!

29. The most painful thing in the world is to have a beautiful dream and be awakened by urine.

I said to keep a low profile, but you gave me applause and screams.

3 1, do you know the name of the iron ring on Wukong's head? Hericium erinaceus?

32. I only had a nosebleed once, but I still mistook the sanitary towel for a mask!

This idiom is actually used to describe ancient and modern female artists!

34. Elder sister, I estimate that Nu Wa must have poured three catties of iron on your face when she gave birth.

35. I'm not thinking about you in rainy days, I'm thinking about when the newly washed clothes will dry.

36. I remember what I said the most when I was a child, that is, I won't play with you.

37. I am also the seed of infatuation, and I drowned in the rain.

38. Happiness means having you for breakfast after good morning and having you for good night after dinner.

How can you say you are crazy? If you have a brain, too.

40. When all my typing skills know you, I think I really fell in love with you.

4 1, the chemistry teacher asked: What about gas leakage? Don't panic, light a cigarette and calm down.

I only drink pure water when drinking water and pure milk when drinking milk, so I am very simple.

43. There are always a few people. The whole class laughed as soon as the teacher told them to get up and answer questions.

44. Play hard: You can only play if you have a life, but you have no life. What can you play?

45. Some people test their strength, others test their eyesight, and I test it entirely by imagination.

46. Other students' photos can be used as wallpaper, and my classmates' photos can only be used as expression packs.

47. It's not that I can't meet better, but because of you, I don't want to meet better.

48. How long is a minute? It depends on whether you are squatting in the toilet or squatting outside the toilet.

49. Your brain is cramped, your cerebellum is knotted, and your central nervous system is abnormal. I suggest you kill yourself.

50. We are good friends. I'll give you a hand when you fall, but only after I finish laughing.

5 1, I just want to say that you overestimated my ability about my parents' suspicion of puppy love.

52. A chicken has been raised for 1000 years, and finally it becomes a sperm. As a result, it became the chicken essence on people's table.

53. A knowing smile, a comforting word and an unnecessary hug are enough.

54. The classmate who plays mobile phone in front reminds the classmate who speaks in the middle not to disturb the classmate who sleeps behind.

55. If a girl watches you nibble your lips this season, don't get me wrong, she may just be biting the dead skin.

56. Love flowers flow eastward, when they flow. It's hard to stop until the end of time and heartbreak.

57. Why does the earth rotate? Probably because I was slapped and eaten tens of millions of years ago.

58. I just want you to accompany me and smile at me. I just want you to kiss me, Doby. I just won't give up.

59. If the leader doesn't give me a raise next month, I'll resign. Before I resign, I'll give him two Chinese coins and kill him.

60, smoking was caught by the teacher, and you wouldn't admit it if you were killed. The teacher asked you why you smell of smoke. Text annotation

6 1, give me a woman and I can create a nation; Give me a bottle of wine and I will lead them to conquer the world!

62. I have fallen. I can't swim until now. You know, before I was born, I was definitely the fastest swimmer. .

63. I have a bad temper, bad grades, bad temper, bad personality and bad looks. The only thing I am proud of is my good digestion.

64. If you like someone, go after him boldly. If you kiss him, he will be yours. What if I don't like you after kissing? So what? You kissed him anyway.

65. A woman, standing in front of clothes like an emperor, thinks every day, who should I favor today? I looked, alas, it's time for me to be embarrassed again.

66. My friend said that the second half-price advertisement, single dog, said it was very hurtful. I said single dog, that's your business, and we single pigs said it's just right to eat two.

67. At school, the speed of copying homework is WiFi and the speed of writing is 4G; The speed of copying homework at home is 3G, but the speed of writing by yourself is disconnected.

I have no time to participate in your past, and I won't miss your future again! In sincerity, get to know you; Linxi is with you day and night.

Recently, I always feel that there is an invisible force around my neck, and there is always a cool breeze behind me. Did you meet my brother and put on his sweater backwards?

70. Fate let me know you, just like finding an embroidery needle in the vast sea, more like finding a female monkey who can't climb trees in the zoo.

7 1, the two luckiest things in my life: one is that time has finally exhausted my love for you; One was the day a long time ago, when I met you.

72. You smiled, and my sky cleared up; You are upset, and my sky is overcast; Your every move affects my mood. Honey, I miss you in the honey pot!

73. I really want to hug you tightly and make you feel my heart beat faster because I love you. I really want to hold you tightly and let you feel my shortness of breath, because I love you.

74. It's not that I don't fold the quilt, mainly because I miss the past, or I like the quilt that I slept the day before. I have to raise this living habit problem to personality cultivation.

75. Some secrets can only be kept in your heart and borne by yourself. I don't want to lie to you, but I'm more afraid of your painful blame, so I have to pretend to forget you. In fact, you have always been in my heart.

76. How big is your school? I replied that the aunt who sells mala Tang in the west gate of our school refused the uncle who sells rice noodles in the east gate because she didn't like long-distance relationships.

77. I can't promise you anything, but I will do it: if one day you feel hungry, then you will smile and see that I have starved to death in your arms.

78. Husband, you like me so much. Tell me about my advantages. There is no reason to love someone! Then talk about my shortcomings. Lazy, stupid, greedy, short and fat.

79. Humming songs, drinking wine, eating and drinking with your brother, who will make you happy every day; By massaging shoulders, the service industry can last a day and ensure that every day is as happy as a fairy!

80. A bean fell. It's discouraging and frustrating. This bean is me. What can encourage it to stand up? The answer is you! Because there is something called pig encouragement beans.

8 1, I found the secret that my wife hid the money in the boots of the shoe cabinet for a long time. I always reach out and touch one or two pieces of change every month. Until yesterday, I reached for a cactus in my pocket, and I knew it was time to stop.

82. Who says there are no beautiful girls in Peking University? Boys are more like Niu Wangmo. It's not that we are too dissolute, and we can't be frivolous without money. Love painting has never been a pervert! Gentlemen, line up! Occasionally caught a strong J case, but also a female rogue!

Funny classic talking about mood phrases funny talking about mood phrases

1. Children without umbrellas must run hard.

2. How classic it is now and how thrilling it used to be.

3, the road is unyielding, move on.

I have many feelings in my life.

If you wear the mask for too long, it will grow on your face, and then you want to take it off unless it hurts your bones and muscles.

6. I'm not a fortune teller on the overpass, and I can't say so many things you like to hear.

7. Being a man is like Zhen Chen hitting a Japanese man and playing with a Japanese woman.

8, the first thing to get up in the morning, open your eyes, the first thing to sleep at night, close your eyes.

9. Why is there no arranged marriage in the evil new society?

10, if I hadn't hit you, I would have turned against you.

1 1, I didn't have a pot, I would have stewed you!

12, the reason for insomnia is that I am too full, too hungry or miss you too much.

13. Every time I face delicious food, I always tell myself that if I eat too much, I will die. But it turns out that I'm really not afraid of death.

14, people who care don't understand, and people who know don't care.

Monks are fashionable because they all wear harem pants.

16, the three most tangled sentences in class: Why do you study? Look at the blackboard! Why are you looking at the blackboard? Look at me! Why are you looking at me? Read a book!

17. I like people who treat me well when I am fat, and I will definitely repay you when I am thin.

18, dogs are always dogs, and people are sometimes not people.

19, I heard that your face is quite thin recently, and it's almost gone?

20. After all the vicissitudes of life, why do we always feel lonely but prefer to be strangers?

2 1, look at you, you look like a joke!

22. Doesn't mean that men and women are equal now, so why can't I go to the ladies' room?

23. The final review of Xueba before the exam is called checking for leaks, the medium one is called Jingwei Reclamation, and almost it is called Goddess Mending the Sky. I call it creation.

24, a bitch is a bitch, the economic crisis is not expensive!

25. Thank you for your hypocrisy and sincerity, and for making the lies come true.

26. Isn't it said that good medicine tastes bitter? Why hasn't it worked?

27. There are only two kinds of people who can play with me. One is someone who can tolerate my mental derangement, and the other is someone as crazy as me.

28. Can you blame my round face? Can you blame me for the delicious food?

29. The strength of a man is the RMB in your pocket.

30. For Bai, you have achieved three things _ stupid, rich and smelly.

3 1, forgive me for often pretending to be indifferent when I clearly care.

The couple have been married for more than 20 years and have never quarreled. The reporter interviewed her husband: How did you do it? Husband: On the day of daughter-in-law's wedding, the dog yelled at her. She said calmly, this.

33. Xiangyang: Some people say that insomnia is because you are busy in other people's dreams.

34. Cherish what you can have and give up what you can't get. Why not?

35. I saw a question when the exam collapsed, vaguely remembering what the teacher said, but clearly remembering that I didn't listen.

36. The supermarket is too cheat people. Original price 10.00 yuan, special price 9.99 yuan. Give me 1 point if you can.

37. I once owned you, and it hurts to think about it.

38, bitter people, eat dead rice. Working in the underworld.

39. There are only two-hearted women and no spoony men.

40. I shine in this beautiful moment with the attitude of God. Don't disturb mortals.

4 1, life is a chess game. I am willing to be a chess piece. Although I am slow, who has seen me take a step back?

42. Do you know that the biggest advantage of human evolution from walking on four legs to walking on two legs is that two pairs of shoes are saved?

43. insincere people don't say sorry to me. You are the best apology!

44. No matter how many times you make a girl laugh, it is more important than a man who makes her cry once. It kept me awake for a long time.

45. If your heart is not like the sea, how can you have a career like the sea?

46. Sleepless nights drift by (╰ _ ╯) #

No one held my hand, so I put it in my pocket.

48. People like you can make you live for two episodes in the drama I directed at most.

Come on, do you want to die or not?

50. When you see through it, pretend you don't.

5 1, I made so many mistakes that I don't know where I made them now.

52. The clothes you see at first sight are often beyond your means. People who are touched at first sight often don't like you.

53. If you are in a bad mood, go to the supermarket, shake the coke, pound the rice jar, break off Dove and pinch Master Kong.

54. The air purifier is the most pretentious household appliance I have ever seen, especially when we pretend to have a class in the classroom.

55. Don't always think that tanning can cover up the fact that you are an idiot.

56. Those sheep grow into you on sleepless nights.

You should know that the future of Telunsu will not be too bright, so we don't have to be so pure.

58. It's a wonderful life with food, drinks and computers.

59. You are kind, especially when you are sorry for others.

60. I hate to hear the words "I'm sorry", which means that I have been taken advantage of, cheated and even let down.

6 1, you are awesome. Why don't you hang your photo in Tiananmen Square?

62. I just had a telephone interview and chatted about the anecdote of my school days. Ask me about my grades and what I did as a monitor. I'm really not sure. I turned my head and whispered to my wife, are you the monitor at school? The wife nodded. I turned to my phone and said, well, I did it.

63. We are all tired. I didn't cry. You didn't go backwards.

64. Sanitary napkins are so expensive, can we afford them during menstruation?

65. Now the dream can't be realized, because it's nothing in front of reality.

66. Will the person you love in the sleepless night confess to you?

67. Don't listen to things outside the window, just watch soap operas.

68. The only difference between a friend and an assassin is that the assassin stabbed you in the back and you turned around and said painfully, Ah, who are you? A friend stabbed you in the back. You turned around and said in surprise, Ah, it's you!

69. Let me tell you a story. Don't lose sleep all night.

70. The first love is infinitely good, but it hangs early.

7 1, it's sad not to know, and it's even sadder not to know.

Some men are as smart and changeable as the weather. Some women are as stupid as the weather forecast. She can't see the change of the weather.

73. Other people's money and wealth are external things.

74. Let nature take its course. Even if I like you very much, I can't keep bothering you. I hope you can think about me once in a while

75, high-tech era, high-tech talents. I don't kneel to rub the washboard, I go home and kneel to wash the machine.

76. If Shuai Neng is a meal, my face can support you for two lifetimes.

77. The best? The first thing is to sleep with you, or sleep with you for short.

78. Don't promise me easily. I'm afraid you can't do it.

79. It is said that women are as fickle as the weather, and men are like people who broadcast the weather-unreliable.

80. When you feel lonely and helpless, think that there are hundreds of trillions of cells living only for you.

8 1, buying a computer without broadband is like a monk who eats only when wine and meat are ready.

We women are the only flowers in the world, so where do we get so much cow dung?

83. Some questions have no answer, and some things have no result, which is the best result.

84. God didn't give me much responsibility. Why bother me, strain my bones and muscles and starve my body and skin!

85. Hold your hand and walk with your eyes closed. I won't get lost.

86. Parents: Please don't call your children rabbits, because from a genetic point of view, this is very bad for you.

87. True trust is when you say: I fart, she will never cover her nose.

I like your personality, but I don't like your gender.

89. Just like every drop of wine can't bring back the original grapes, I can't bring back my youth.

90. Make contributions to society without harming others!

Adult funny mood phrases

Adult funny mood phrases

1. Love is like a man's sponge, and it is doomed not to last long!

Not for women at first, but for women later.

A star can be more famous if he takes off his clothes a little, but I got caught when I took off my clothes.

4. Girls only need to succeed once from a virgin to a woman, and boys need repeated training from a virgin to a man!

5. The way to attract a man is not to let him get it; The way to attract a woman is just the opposite, that is, to satisfy her.

6. Women are not decent, but decent, because they are not attractive enough; Men don't care about loyalty. Loyalty is because the chips of betrayal are too low.

7. mate selection criteria: family wealth exceeds 100 million, beauty ranks first in the world, virtuous, gentle and sexy, and father-in-law has terminal cancer. ...

8. If you don't eat in the bowl, just eat in the pot.

9. A man's hand is the best medicine for breast enhancement-I finally found out that I have a craft. ...

10. No matter how romantic fairy tales men tell women, there is only one word in them: bed!

1 1. and rival in love from the battlefield to the cemetery; For a woman, put her on the bed from the road;

12. The most touching words are not that I love you, but that you are irresponsible for my pregnancy.

13. Those who don't pay the rent are hooligans.

14. Last night, I couldn't remember, and I was confused by it.

15. The origin is just a newcomer calling. Who heard the old people crying?

16. The back waves of the Yangtze River pushed the front waves and died in a woman's bed.

17. What should I do when facing a woman covered with thorns?

18. The transition process from girl to woman: person, individual and eight.

19. Come out and mix, my wife will change sooner or later!

20. Raise your hand if you love me, or stand upside down if you don't love me!

2 1. bed, money, bright moon, lamp, clothes, loss, ground, cold.

22. Four happy events in a man's life: promotion, getting rich, dead wife and little lover.

23. Men can be romantic but not obscene, and women can be romantic but not have an abortion!

24. How can a woman have a tip if a man is not drunk? How can a man have a chance if a woman is not drunk?