Simple and hilarious joke copywriting

1. Many people say that I can rely on my face to make a living, but I can’t, so I have to rely on my mouth.

2. Others look good when they smile, but you are different. You look funny.

3. The teacher asked: Who can translate "The sparrow knows the ambition of the swan" into modern Chinese? "The second-rate guy replied: You don't understand my world...

4. I farted in the elevator, and I shouted "Something is muddy", so someone in the elevator took my The fart is sucked clean.

5. I have a colleague who is allergic to mutton. His face becomes swollen when he eats mutton, so everyone takes him with him every time he eats kebabs. The more his face swells, which restaurant The more authentic the mutton is.

6. When we were driving on the expressway and approaching the service area, the driver shouted: "If you need to go to the bathroom quickly, be prepared in advance!" "A buddy next to me asked weakly: "How can we prepare in advance? Do you want to take off your pants now?

7. I was hospitalized for infusion last week due to illness, and the time I spent playing mobile games flew by. When I looked up and saw the bottom of the bottle, I panicked and shouted: "Waiter, fill it up!"

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8. My wife always likes to use the tactics of crying, making trouble and hanging herself to warn me not to find a mistress. This makes me very angry because she never uses the third trick.

9. I was taking the bus that day and suddenly I had to fart and I couldn’t hold it in anymore. There happened to be music, so I farted several times in batches according to the rhythm. Then I realized I was wearing headphones.

10. I have passed by a person countless times. My clothes were all torn and there were no sparks.

12. “The subway was so crowded when I went to work in the morning, and the bread I bought was squashed. "What's this? I was in a much more serious situation than you once." "What, how is your bread squeezed?" "It's not bread. I wanted to fart, but it forced me to burp!" ”

13. “Doctor, I haven’t been able to sleep well or have fun lately. Am I suffering from a terminal illness?” "It's time to start school soon."

14. I am wearing a dragon robe, I am as rich as the enemy, I am powerful, I spend money like water, I am knowledgeable, I am wise and courageous, I am handsome, I am romantic Suave, I'm the one who attracts the most attention! I'll be even better after two more drinks

15. I haven't been to my aunt since I was 16 years old, and I was shy and didn't dare to ask my parents secretly a few days ago. I went to the hospital for a check-up, and the doctor said that boys would never come to their aunt's house!

16. Princesses are always woken up by princes' kisses, but I am woken up by being hungry or peeing.

17. The man held his wife who was in a car accident tightly in his arms, "Dear, what else can I do for you?" The wife said breathlessly, "Just one thing. Why the hell can you stop, stop smiling so happily. ”

18. When I brought my boyfriend home on the weekend, he said that my dad was nervous and didn’t know where to put his hands. I said if you were nervous, just put them in your pockets. After that, my dad pulled me over alone and asked me: Is your boyfriend not sick? Why is he putting one hand in his jacket pocket and one hand in his pants pocket?

19. People used to say that I had small eyes, but one day, I I was lying on the sofa watching TV, and suddenly my mother came back and turned off the TV, and then silently covered me with the quilt.

20. A young couple quarreled. Female: As long as your thoughts are far away, just give it. Get away! The man said calmly: According to your thinking, I should stay put.

21. The heroine in the TV series leans her head against the glass of the bus. It’s really beautiful. Damn it, I tried it and almost didn’t get a concussion.

22. When I went to work for the first time during the summer vacation of my sophomore year, the supervisor asked us to put our hands together and say Sava to the customer. Dika. I was nervous when I saw a beautiful woman, and said Amitabha with my hands together.

23. An old man talked to the old lady, you have such a beautiful hair style, you got it there. The wife immediately pulled off her hair: I picked it up for you, I spent a lot of money to buy it.

24. You see a lump of poop on the ground. When you go up and smell it, it seems to be poop. You pick up a little bit with your hand and put it in your mouth. It tastes like it is still poop. You say happily: Fortunately, you didn’t step on it.