The reason why boys don't want to break up, and not wanting to drag each other down is an excuse to break up?

Don't want to drag each other down is an excuse to break up?

I can say for sure that this is an excuse. It is decent for adults to break up. "I don't want to drag you down", "I don't deserve you" and "you deserve better" are actually words to save face for each other. You are still distressed by his humbleness and want to prove that the love between two people can smooth the gap. He has made all the decisions. There is only one real reason for all breakups, that is, there is something more important than this love. It may be freedom, it may be interest, it may be a trade-off under weighing the pros and cons, or it may just be "no feeling" suddenly.

But do these reasons necessarily lead to breaking up? Not necessarily. If it is decided by interests, it can only be said that two people try their best to negotiate. Here is only the case of "no feeling". Many people may have experienced it when they are in love. Obviously, the relationship is quite good, but one day I suddenly feel that I don't love, I am tired, or I don't have that kind of warm heart feeling. Most people will think that this is the disappearance of love. In fact, you may just be tired of your relationship. For example, you are still used to each other's existence, but there will be no impulse for the time being, and you can adjust the running-in.

1. Find your mood switch. Emotional switch refers to the emotional state that two people wake up when they accompany each other to do what they were originally excited about and review this experience. If it can still arouse enthusiasm, joy and nostalgia, it proves that the problem of relationship is not too big. If all you evoke is disappointment, sadness, panic, and even hope that you have never been together, then this relationship is already in jeopardy. 2. Describe your feelings in detail. In a relationship that is about to end, people often experience passivity and defense. Negative emotions increase, so does the defense against your partner, such as finding excuses to refuse physical contact, not wanting to be with him, and no longer trusting his love. You can pay close attention to your feelings. If you are negative most of the day, it is difficult to recover.

3. If you want to work harder. If he says "I don't want to drag you down" and you want to work harder, you should know the meaning behind what he said. The first meaning, he thinks you are taller than him, which may be status, work, salary, psychological maturity and ideological differences. At this time, you need to consider whether you are willing to change for him, and don't put pressure on him to rush. The second meaning is that his own inferiority and insecure attachment make him have no courage to be with you. We can see whether the contradictions and behavioral differences in getting along make him feel insecure. You can have a good talk with him, or do marriage counseling and discuss a plan to make him feel safe. The third meaning is that he just made an excuse and didn't want you to ask too many questions. Adults always come and go at the drop of a hat. If you have strong psychological strength, you can get to the bottom of it and listen to the shortcomings he sees from the perspective of his partner. Even if you are separated, you can refer to improvement to make the next relationship smoother.