How to treat "unfilial daughter-in-law, who will thunder" mother-in-law's circle of friends?

The quality of mother-in-law is a crucial factor, although it does not play a decisive role in the marriage relationship between two people.

The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law has always been subtle and complicated. The process of getting along needs to test the understanding and tolerance of two people. If one party does not do well enough, it may lead to imbalance.

When she was not married, Zhang Yin wanted to be filial to her mother-in-law's daughter-in-law. She thinks that as long as she treats others sincerely, her mother-in-law will definitely see her goodness and treat herself in the same way.

Later, I learned that the world is not as beautiful as I imagined. For example, there are many people, and if you treat them badly, they will treat you well in turn.

It's even possible that this kindness is just an act. And her mother-in-law happens to be a good disguise.

Before getting married, she was always glad that she had met a good mother-in-law. She said that the first time she went to her mother-in-law's house, her mother-in-law didn't mention it. She kept holding her hand as if her mother had met her daughter.

She wanted to help in the kitchen, and her mother-in-law kept saying, "How could you? You are a guest, just sit on the sofa and watch TV. "

When she left, her mother-in-law gave her a big red envelope and told her that she felt very destined when she saw her, hoping to become a family in the future.

After going to her mother-in-law's house, she recognized her husband in her heart, because both his personal conduct and his family passed all the high marks in her heart at this time.

The next thing is to take my boyfriend home to meet his parents. Soon both adults sat together to discuss marriage, and everything went smoothly.

When she got married, she asked for a bride price of 68 thousand, and then her family added a part as a dowry and returned 100 thousand. Mother-in-law's house is boring. Anyway, she said from beginning to end: "Listen to you, you can't wronged your daughter."

At that time, I was moved for a long time because of my mother-in-law's words, and I didn't react until I got married. Mother-in-law is so accommodating because her family has never made any excessive demands.

02

In life, I am not afraid of a bad person, but I am afraid that a person's duplicity is not good, and the actual inner thoughts and actions are completely inconsistent.

In fact, the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is even more afraid of this situation. Zhang Yin said that if she knew her mother-in-law's true character before marriage, she would definitely not get married.

Before marriage, her understanding of her mother-in-law was a circle of friends, except for the two sides she had seen in her life.

Her mother-in-law retired because she had no grandchildren and had a lot of free time. Later, she learned to surf the Internet and made friends more frequently than her, sometimes several times a day.

In addition to some daily chores, sometimes I will make a lot of speeches, mostly about children.

My mother-in-law has a daughter who is married, and it seems that life is hard. From time to time, my mother-in-law will send a circle of friends to condemn her daughter's in-laws and say something like "People are doing, the sky is watching, and people should have a conscience".

Sometimes I say that if I become a mother-in-law, I will definitely treat her as my daughter. This makes her feel that her mother-in-law's three views are really positive.

She said that she didn't expect the blind date to meet such a reliable person. She met her husband on a blind date. When they met, her husband was almost 30 years old and his family was in a hurry. She is three years old and her family is urging her.

So, two people soon entered the marriage. After marriage, when she really lived with her mother-in-law, she realized that her previous affection for her mother-in-law was just an illusion.

Her mother-in-law's attitude has become this: after marriage, you are a member of our family, and naturally you have to listen to our family. If you don't listen, you won't be a good wife.

And my mother-in-law is a person who especially likes to flaunt her efforts.

For example, when I cook a meal for her, I sometimes send a circle of friends and say that I personally cooked it for my daughter-in-law. Sometimes there will be comments below, but she can't see them unless she is a good friend.

But the mother-in-law's reply is generally a direct reply, and everyone can see it. Most people say this is what they should do.

03

Of course, it's not just that. My mother-in-law likes to take out a sesame green bean and give it away, and some of them are not made for her at all. My mother-in-law also said that it was specially made for her.

At the same time, my mother-in-law's daughter often comes back because her life in her in-laws is not good. She and her sister-in-law have a good relationship and can talk together.

But after a while, she found that the reason for the conflict between her sister-in-law and her husband's family was mostly her mother-in-law.

Because my mother-in-law will give her daughter a lot of ideas and tell her what to do if she wants to stand in her mother-in-law's house. In her opinion, many things were unnecessary.

For example, the mother-in-law will tell her daughter that she should master the family economy after marriage, and don't let her mother-in-law and husband be the masters, because they will always be on guard against her.

At the beginning, my sister-in-law didn't care about the family, but her mother-in-law said that she would take the family economy into her own hands. Because of this requirement, two people who have always had a good relationship almost divorced.

Sister-in-law's personality is really not suitable for taking charge of the economy and likes to spend money without restraint, but her mother-in-law thinks that money should be in her daughter's hands, no matter how much.

At that time, after her daughter won, her mother-in-law was happy to send a circle of friends, to the effect that she was finally relieved.

But when I arrived at my mother-in-law's house, my mother-in-law's requirements completely changed. To put it simply, the mother-in-law wants her daughter to go to other people's homes to make decisions, but at the same time she wants her daughter-in-law to come to her own home to listen to them.

Mother-in-law made many stumbles to stand in front of her, but at the same time pretended to like her very much. As soon as she does something, she publicizes it. Her mother also added her mother-in-law, who has always said that her mother-in-law is a good person.

What impressed me most was that her mother-in-law told her to get up in the morning and cook for her family, saying that they were like this at that time. After working for two days, she was tired and didn't want to get up early. Mother-in-law said she was lazy and praised her diligence by the way.

Mother-in-law wants her to take it out to supplement the family expenses. Her mother specifically said that the money could not be used until the critical moment, so she saved it for a fixed period of time. My mother-in-law has a great opinion about this, saying that it is difficult to prevent domestic thieves, and she is very puzzled.

04

Moreover, the mother-in-law occasionally regrets that her daughter-in-law is not a daughter, and she can't count on it when she is old, but she doesn't know what to say.

Living under one roof, she sometimes sees her mother-in-law's face and is always in a bad mood.

At first, she said she wanted to live separately. It was her mother-in-law who said that the family was in financial difficulties and the house was bought only two years ago. She bought a big house specially for her son's future marriage.

She thinks that her mother-in-law can get along well, live together after marriage, and maybe help with cooking and cleaning. They can also relax and agree.

Once, because her mother-in-law came back late from dancing, she and her husband ate the meal first, but left it for her mother-in-law, and it was specially left before eating. Her mother-in-law didn't eat much, so she put it all in the bowl.

When my mother-in-law came back, she didn't say anything because her son was here. Who knows that night she saw a message from her mother-in-law circle of friends: the unfilial daughter-in-law was going to be struck by lightning.

She is from unknown so, but her mother-in-law said that she was so moved by watching a TV series. Her mother-in-law didn't watch TV at all when she went back that night. She usually watches it in the living room and goes to bed early that night.

Her heart is also on fire, and she feels that her mother-in-law's circle of friends is really a large-scale double-standard scene and a drama scene. She sets all the standards, and good words and bad words will come.

She also told her husband several times about her troubles, but he always felt that she was thinking too much, saying that her mother didn't mean that and told her not to slander her mother.

She said that she would never really treat her mother-in-law again after she thought about it.

Between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, if one thing is behind her face and her words and deeds are different, this hypocrisy is most likely to consume the sincerity of the other party, and at the same time establish a defense mechanism in her heart. It will be difficult for both sides to get along well in the future.

Mother-in-law is sincere to her daughter-in-law, and naturally it is easy to get the gratitude of the other party.

Many friends around me who become other people's daughters-in-law want to get along well with their mother-in-law before marriage, but they passively change their minds after marriage, and their mother-in-law's words and deeds force them to put themselves on the opposite side.

At the same time, you can't treat each other as "imaginary enemies" from the beginning. It is a long way to be truly friendly between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and both sides should keep the word understanding in mind.