"Inferiority, sensitivity, extreme depression, pessimism", full of shortcomings, how should I deal with myself?

Man is a strange animal. He always takes this and that for granted. Over time, he built himself a cage and shut himself in.

Man is the product of the environment. Under what circumstances, people will basically develop in what direction.

When I was in college, I had a classmate from a minority nationality, who had poor Mandarin and a strong local accent. At first, I could hardly understand what he was saying. When you do things, you are afraid of this and that. I am timid and shy. Afraid to speak when meeting strangers, timid. I will still think about things in my heart, and I will want to do so to make my classmates unhappy. That will make the teacher uncomfortable, and his classmates will be a little disgusted with him. So he felt very inferior, which I only knew when he chatted with me. He said that he especially envied my careless character. Later, I invited him to join the club, where I met many people. When the club held activities, the minister asked us to cooperate as much as possible to complete the assigned tasks. At this time, I urged him to express some opinions, but the result was unsuccessful. Then I'll express my views and thoughts. When I was a sophomore, some schoolmates came, and we began to do some guidance. At this time, he began to have some opinions. During this period, I took him out to do a lot of part-time jobs, especially teaching in kindergarten for half a year. He began to take care of people slowly. In my junior year, he and I followed the teacher to do experiments, and at the same time served as class assistants in the freshman class, holding class meetings for my brothers and sisters at any time. I often spend time with several counselors and teachers this semester, and it is common to brag and chat with teachers. Since then, I have been out of control, and I will talk to my classmates in a roundabout way, joking and humorous. Now that I have graduated for several years, I can't help bragging when I see him. I admire him. Now he is the regional sales director of a company.

So I think people will change, mainly depending on the people and environment you are in contact with. I think everyone should try to contact different environments. If you feel sad and uneasy in the current environment, then I suggest you change your environment or do something you haven't done before. For example, discuss problems with classmates, talk to parents about interesting things that happened at school, ask some friends where to play, talk to good friends about their dreams and so on.

I know everyone has their own ideas, so you should express them and express your opinions when you meet something. Gradually, people will come to ask you something and treat you as a heart-to-heart friend. Only by walking on your own can you gain something.

In short, it is to do things seriously and learn to be a man.

Sometimes we feel inferior and sensitive because we care too much about other people's opinions and evaluations, hoping to get everyone's approval. Once you don't do a little well, you will fall into a state of inferiority.

In fact, others don't care so much about others, especially some details of themselves. Sometimes they just say it casually and then forget it. But for those who are sensitive and self-abased, they remember very clearly and care very much. The judgment of others is not enough to affect our lives. Only when we truly accept ourselves can we have a wonderful life in high live. So we need to know ourselves objectively and evaluate ourselves objectively.

It is easy for us to exaggerate negative emotions and our own shortcomings, but it is not so exaggerated. For example, when we are lovelorn or divorced, we will imagine the scene of separation, feel very painful and unable to extricate ourselves, and even feel that we can't live alone.

In fact, we all overestimate the duration and intensity of negative emotions such as pain, guilt and shame. Such negative emotions will only get worse if they continue. Only by correctly understanding and treating it can we defeat it. So we need self-encouragement and self-comfort to make ourselves confident and happy. In order to get rid of inferiority, sensitivity, extreme depression and pessimism.

1. Extremely inferior and sensitive, you can feel yourself like this. Maybe you are a sensitive and emotional person. From this perspective, it is also an advantage. The reason why I feel bad in my own eyes may be that I am sensitive to criticism and rejection, easy to feel a kind of negation, and have avoidant personality characteristics.

2. Depression and pessimism. Most people feel this way when they are depressed. Some people may make themselves feel tall by "beating chicken blood". They dare not face their powerful "helpless, not excellent" self, and dare to feel their "pain" emotions. This is also an advantage. Everyone has worldly desires, and all emotions will "flow through" the whole body. When the truth comes out, they can better understand themselves and take control of their lives.

3. Covered in shortcomings, looking at yourself like this shows that the state at that time was really poor, and I couldn't think of anything good about myself, so I felt "extremely sensitive, inferior, depressed and pessimistic". Where there is a shadow, there is light shining, otherwise we can't see the shadow. After being immersed in sadness, you may be able to see yourself from another angle.

In short, facing yourself and knowing yourself more comprehensively will enhance your strength and better grasp life.

The words "inferiority, sensitivity, extreme depression and pessimism" made me feel powerless to change, and I was "depressed".

First, you have to take off these labels. These words are highly generalized and negative, and they are a rigid and static evaluation. I don't know when it started. When I put such personality labels on myself, I found myself getting closer and closer to these labels. This is a kind of "self-testimony prediction", and the subsequent behavior is more inclined to inferiority, extreme depression and pessimism.

Inferiority originated from early growth. Children brought up by authoritative parents are easily related to inferiority complex, but we shouldn't blame everything now on family of origin's influence. Emotionalization tends to narrow people's horizons and make their thoughts extreme, so we should learn to understand emotions, increase our sensitivity to our own emotions, and avoid going to extremes. At the same time, if you look at the scenery from different angles now, the scenery will be different. Learning to look at people and things dialectically from multiple angles will make you no longer extreme.

In the classification of temperament types, there is a classification that divides people into choleric, sanguine, mucinous and depressive. Depression patients are characterized by: keen, steady, profound experience, gentle appearance, cowardice, loneliness and slow action. According to your description and my guess, you can be classified as depression.

There is no difference between good and bad temperament types. So you should treat your temperament with a normal heart. Character and your behavior are acquired. Although your character has certain stability, it is not static. Understand your own personality characteristics, give full play to your subjective initiative, foster strengths and avoid weaknesses, and you will find a different self and gain a different life.

You say you are sensitive to inferiority and extremely depressed and pessimistic, but in fact you are with someone who evaluates you as sensitive to inferiority and extremely depressed and pessimistic. These two parts show a relationship in your heart, which often comes from your relationship with your parents in your early years. In this relationship, your parents accuse you of inferiority, sensitivity, extreme depression and pessimism, and all they see is your shortcomings. The meaning of every life comes from the eyes of parents. What your parents see from you, you see what you are. Therefore, the above judgment on yourself may also come from this. As for whether it is true or not, it is not necessarily because you may get different comments from others and hear others' advantages and praises for you.

But why do we agree with our parents instead of trusting others? Because we can live like this, because our parents are the people we depend on, this attachment theory has been verified by experiments and clinics: everyone's mode of getting along with others comes from the relationship with the main caregivers in his early years. In order to adapt to this kind of caregiver, children will learn from an early age what methods can make caregivers happy. Although they may not be satisfactory, they must try to do it.

Therefore, in fact, parents' views on children are limited and subjective, but children don't think so. In children's eyes, parents are heaven and the whole world. But when a person grows up to a certain extent and wants to live in a new way, he doesn't want to live in the old way, because he is too tired and has no self, which often marks a new beginning, or a new life, because you want to get along with yourself, which is completely different from the relationship you can't get along with in the experience, so you need to review what happened and get to know yourself again. When you have a new understanding of yourself, your thoughts, behaviors, feelings and life will naturally happen.

First of all, I am honored to answer this question for you. Let's walk into this problem together, and now let's discuss it together.

Hello, buddy or little sister or little sister! My advice comes from the heart. I want to talk to you and give you a suggestion. Stay away from everything familiar, change the environment, change a strange city, stay for a while, and travel for a while! Don't make friends, just find yourself slowly for a while! You can really try.

To put it bluntly, strengthen yourself first, then consider other things and explain to your family. Get out. Feel free to communicate with me if you have any questions! I once said that at this moment and this stage, no one can really help us! Love yourself. Life is not that bad! ! ! !

The way to get along with yourself is to accept the status quo and believe that you can become better.

Accepting yourself is very important for emotional health: accepting yourself as you are, rather than forcing yourself to achieve the desired goals.

This seems simple, but it is actually difficult to do. We tend to be more critical of ourselves than others, because when we get along with others, we can often accept and tolerate each other's true colors.

However, when we face ourselves, we can rarely express our recognition and satisfaction with our state. Because we have set many goals for ourselves, we have been chasing them.

We should be slimmer, more beautiful, smarter and stronger ... it's hard for us to admit that we are now, because pursuing higher goals makes us feel that life is more meaningful. But we forget to recognize ourselves at this moment, even if we are not good enough.

If at present, we are deeply depressed, depressed, confused and turned, we will feel excluded from ourselves. There is no way to accept the unbearable state, which makes us sink deeper and deeper in the whirlpool of negative emotions.

Inferiority means not allowing or accepting that you are in a bad position.

When you can't accept the reality, it's easy to bring this "disapproval" to others. Think that others see themselves the same way.

Over time, social barriers have arisen and the enthusiasm for life has decreased. The starting point of this vicious circle is that you don't accept who you really are.

In fact, we are not as bad as we thought. Try to face the facts, learn to face them calmly and improve slowly.

I have both, and I believe many people have them.

Many times, the reason why we have these present situations is that we are not confident enough, have no good face enough, are too self-centered and live in our own thoughts.

Many times, we will bring our own views into any situation and replace each other's views on things with "my thoughts", which makes us feel that it is very inappropriate to say or do this, which leads us to dare not say or do it, and always live in our own world.

Everyone with inferiority complex has a blx. I am afraid that others will look down on me, so I wrap myself in a "coat" to keep others away from me and close my psychological real world, because we feel that hiding in such a world is the safest and most comfortable, which is what we think is the comfort zone. To change this situation, as long as you give up your self-esteem and have a thicker skin, you can improve.

Many times, when we do something, we always think, "How?" "What will others think if I do this?" When this kind of self-thought occupies our minds before doing or saying, it will hinder us from speaking freely or listening to each other's true meaning and expressing our true meaning.

So this mentality is normal, don't bring psychological pressure. Treat it normally and change it slowly.

In short, relax and force yourself to change a little every day, even if there is no change, don't complain about yourself. I believe that one day you will see yourself differently, as long as you change.

Everyone has shortcomings and advantages. I am a super brother in the countryside. Self-handling method:

1. Ask and answer more questions in Wukong's question, see what advantages and disadvantages others have, and learn from them.

2. Communicate with your neighbors and friends and learn from others.

3. You can also take part in some training to recharge yourself and learn a skill.

Think about it, what kind of process makes you feel inferior and sensitive in your life experience?

What is the reason why you can't accept your inferiority and sensitivity? Is it because you are afraid of not being loved or because of something?

Before solving a problem, you need a process of finding the reason.

And then really make up your mind to change.

There may be environmental influence, and your parents are strict with you. In this process, you have learned a lot about yourself and your parents' handling of yourself.

Adler believes that the influence of past experiences on people is inevitable. But whether we decide our life or not is something we can choose independently.

Perhaps it is your fear and fear that make you afraid to face it, so you use your own shortcomings to escape.

You only see your own shortcomings because you are determined not to like yourself. Because of fear of being denied by others, being hated by others, being hurt in interpersonal relationships, and being despised or rejected by others. This is actually a vicious circle. Therefore, repeatedly strengthen their own shortcomings.

Keep complaining and stop yourself from growing up.

Pay too much attention to what others say about you, and live for what others expect. It is extremely difficult to improve your sense of self-worth by relying on what others think of you. You pin your happiness on others.

As for sensitivity, do you think you are sensitive? Sensitivity and sensitivity are very different. Sensitivity is that I quickly perceive it. Sensitivity means that I compare myself after I perceive it, and then I feel bad about myself. You can make a choice. You can take a little risk in sensitive situations and try not to make comparisons. It's your choice. See if you want to do it.