Humor, talk about mood quotations

It is understandable that there is no beef in the beef noodles, no wife in the old lady's cake and no breasts in the bra. The following are the classic quotations about humor that I collected for you. Welcome to reading.

1, I thought I was a flower on the cliff, but later I realized that I was just scum in the sea of people.

For bachelors, Valentine's Day is like a period, which hurts once.

3, wages are like running water, loans are like hungry ghosts, eat a big meal at the beginning of the month and learn from turtles at the end of the month.

4, people who can't lose weight are always in turmoil, and people who don't eat fat are fearless.

Someone said I was handsome, and I smiled. As a result, they said I was more handsome when I smiled.

6. You can't laugh at your mobile phone at home, and your parents will think you are in love.

7. At most, I am a descendant of Lei Feng. Please call me Ren Lei!

8. There is no beef in the beef noodles, and there is no wife in the old lady's cake, so it is understandable that there is no breast in the bra.

9. Women conquer men with stockings. Men conquer banks with silk stockings.

10 teacher, can we wait until Logger Vick cuts down the tree, the wolf eats the sheep, Tom catches Jerry, and the monster eats the Tang Priest before we start school?

1 1. True love is when you clearly think the other person is a pig and you are afraid of being taken away by others.

12, I like men to show women. Bored in front of others. Coquettish in front of me.

13, cow dung is cow dung after all, and it will not turn into sweet cake if it is steamed in a pot.

14. There are two plastic bags in my class. They pack, pack, pack all day.

Although I don't like seafood, mermaids are acceptable.

Every time I see a thin man in the street, I want to share some meat with her.

17. Although you are wearing cologne, I can still vaguely smell the slag.

18, did you hear that? You treat me like a game, I'll kill you.

19, the base is also an art, let's do this art well together!

20, the old vine is faint, and I don't earn enough money. I am still alone. I am ugly, and no one wants to be blind.

2 1, the comparison of anti-freezing problems between north and south people can be summarized as follows: southerners have high anti-freezing character and northerners have high anti-freezing equipment.

Remember to smile when you meet lightning, because that's the sky taking pictures of you.

23. Playing the fool, if done well, is a stupid thing. Well done, it is called deep.

At that corner, I saw a blind man chasing a lame man.

25. During the exam, none of the students on both sides could do it, which really put me in a dilemma.

Just because I looked at you again in the crowd, you asked me to answer questions on the blackboard.

27, let the storm come more violently, anyway, I sell umbrellas!

28. Grandpa said: I watched the news broadcast for decades, but I didn't see the finale.

29. Do you think I will watch you die? I close my eyes.

30. I don't know if I am awesome, but when someone tells me that "you are dead and the earth is still turning", I feel that the earth is persisting.

3 1, many people say that marriage is the grave of love, but it is better to be buried underground than to die in the street.

32. Don't think that I am out of reach because I am handsome. Actually, I am a sea of rivers.

33. Remember the black rice brother who refused to go out in Daming Lake?

34. My parents always suspected that I met people at school, and they talked as if someone could like me.

35. Whether I tease depends on whether the person standing in front of me is familiar with me.

God gave me a National Day holiday, but I didn't cherish it. If you give me another chance, I will do my homework well! The premise is to give another one!

37. I want to streaking in summer, and how many clothes I wear in winter is like streaking.

38. Male bosses always want to have a female secretary around them and have nothing to do.

39. The life of scum is like this: if you do well in the exam, you will be suspected, and if you do badly in the exam, you will be scolded.

40. What you say when you are in love is called love talk. After breaking up, treat it as a joke.

4 1, woman, don't take your enchanting appearance as a cheap token. Men, don't regard their unruly character as narcissistic capital.

42. Learning God is brushing questions, learning tyrants are brushing homework, and learning scum is brushing dynamics.

43. Go west, cross the Terminator Line, cross the Japan Line, and go back to the day when I first met you.

44, the big electric cannon flew, and the mouth fell off] Look here after running, tell me what kind of dog you are.

45. The tragedy of life is that when you want to do anything, you only have a knife.

46. I usually forget to scold you. You didn't know I was smart and brave until I hit you.

47. When I have money, I will take the person I hate the most to the best mental hospital.

48, too depressed is not good, everything is enough, not too much, you can be nothing.

49. Happiness is actually very simple. It's sweet to have grandpa with you, even if it's just getting up early with a glass of water.

50. I wish you a happy summer: Pepsi mirinda, very cola iced tea, Coca-Cola Wahaha.

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