Where did the idea of abstinence come from during the death of a loved one? Is it Buddhist?

Teacher Nan said: The ancients kept filial piety for their parents for three years.

Confucius said: the son was born for three years and then freed from his parents' arms. To lose a husband for three years is to lose the whole world. Yes, have you loved your parents for three years?

This refers to our ancient ceremony in China, and now this system has undergone great changes. Historical times can't be brought back, so don't worry about the modern situation. At that time, Confucius was conservative and strongly advocated the maintenance of filial piety. Major events between parents' life and death should be in accordance with ancient etiquette.

In ancient China, parents died for three years and mourned for three years. Many of our friends kept this rule decades ago. At least before we came to Taiwan Province Province, when we were on the mainland, they still wore a white cloth or a black cloth on their arms. Not now, it has changed from three years to three days. During the mourning period, a small "system" should be printed on the business card and next to the name to indicate mourning. In ancient times, it was more serious. Study the ancient political system of our country. The so-called sacred dynasty ruled the world with filial piety. People who were officials, both civilian military attache and big and small officials, all suffered the loss of their parents. It would be wrong if they returned to China immediately without asking for leave. It is very serious to supervise suggestions and impeach them immediately, and they can be punished to the point where they can never be employed.

However, there is one exception. For a military commander, he is fighting at the front. If his parents are dead, he will still have to ask for leave from the court before returning to China. The emperor can issue an imperial decree to persuade him to change his filial piety into loyalty, so that he can't go home. As can be seen in the play, in some plays, a military commander wears half a white robe, which means that he is Dai Xiao. This is a special comfort to the emperor, and the country must have this person; Some were used by the emperor after he returned to his hometown for mourning. Before his mourning was full, he was called "get up". There are two situations, one is to use it after retirement, and the other is to use it for people returning home. This ancient political system does have its advantages. A person has been in politics for a long time, divorced from the people for too long, and knows nothing about the people. After returning home, Dumen thought about it, and he was not allowed to entertain guests and contact local officials, so he could go deep into the people. This is an ancient ceremony in China, and the change of social atmosphere and political system is only in recent decades.

In ancient times, even the emperor had to mourn for three years. For example, marriage is forbidden during funeral. If the young emperor wants to get married before he ascended the throne, he can only rely on the order of the empress dowager. In the Tang, Song, Ming and Qing Dynasties, the old emperor died, and the new emperor was not in place. The funeral was not announced, so the marriage was held first and the funeral was sent the next day, otherwise it would violate etiquette. This ancient ceremony should be observed even by emperors, which is the spirit of China culture.

Jae-woo is a student who sleeps during the day. He asked that at present, our social system, in which parents have to mourn for three years after their death, is very old from ancient times to the present. Now, Zaiyu says that nothing can move for three years, and everything is broken. Just like rice, the old one is cut, and the new one grows again. The season has changed and the years have changed. I think mourning for one year is enough. Confucius said that your parents died. Do you think you can go to music and dance in a year? Jae-woo said, Ann! Confucius said, if you feel at ease, just do it your way! Nobody forced you. You can dance in three days, as long as you feel at ease. Funeral doesn't depend on rules, but everyone should come from the heart. Ancient culture is based on heart, not law. A gentleman, whose parents died, was in mourning, had no taste in eating, was unhappy in listening to music and couldn't sleep well, so for three years, there was no ceremony and no music. Now I ask you, can you feel at ease for a year? You say you can feel at ease, then you can do it well. It is unnecessary to advocate changing it to one year. Others are unwilling to change it. This is someone else's business. Confucius touched a rubber nail for Zaiyu and he went out.

So Confucius told other students that the slaughtered person had no conscience. What Confucius said below is the truth about the three-year loss of China culture.

He said that children can't leave their parents' arms until they are three years old. Especially in ancient times, when there was no milk, a person walked for three years and left his parents' arms, and then no one cared for him for 20 years. These three years are the most important, let's be friends! These two old friends took care of you for three years, and then they died. How can I repay the feelings of these three years? Therefore, the lost three years are a little reward for the parents who raised us for three years. This is the same for all human beings in the world, but Zaiyu opposes it and advocates changing it to one year. In this way, I don't miss my parents for three years in Yu, just like my parents raised us for three years. If it is changed to one year, it can be said that there is no dutiful son in the world, and all parents in the world take care of their children when they are less than three years old. Therefore, in China culture, parents died for three years to repay this kindness, which is only the minimum return. In fact, the kindness of parents does not stop there. When children grow up after the age of three, they should take care of their twenties.

So this shows that what Jin Shengtan, a naughty boy, said has the highest truth. Now, in his words, he wrote a letter to his son: You and I are friends. At first, you didn't designate me as your father, and I didn't designate you as my son. We met unexpectedly, so there was no friendship to talk about. But then again, this old man (referring to himself) and this old lady (referring to his wife) have been taking care of you for twenty years since they wiped your shit and peed. In these 20 years, go to the society to find out if there are any better friends than these two old friends. We are not asking you to be filial now. These are all empty words. Please take care of these two old friends for twenty years, and also take care of these two old friends for twenty years. This is Jin Shengtan's game, and it also shows the true philosophy of filial piety.

So China's filial piety is the return of love. Therefore, Confucius said that nowadays, people really miss their parents for three years after their parents die. Do they still care as much as their parents when they were less than three years old? I have no memory of these three years, let alone filial piety. In recent decades, the meaning of "dutiful son" has been reversed and interpreted as dutiful son. This passage is about filial piety. Let's talk about the Book of Filial Piety.

According to the culture of China described by Confucius, Ceng Zi wrote the Book of Filial Piety, one of the thirteen classics. In the Book of Filial Piety, filial piety should be filial piety to parents, while filial piety should be filial piety to the whole world, and everyone in the world should treat it like parents. This is the major principle of China's political philosophy. Politicians treat ordinary people as filial as their parents, and changing their names is loyalty. Therefore, people engaged in politics should have filial piety. On this moral basis, going out to engage in politics is the basic focus of China's political philosophy, which is also the basic focus of the Book of Filial Piety.