Insulting her mother-in-law's circle of friends has no baby, and her mother-in-law has no baby.

This is the199th true story from my mother.

Letters:

Hello, mother peach.

I am the mother of two children. The eldest boy is four years old and the two girls are one year old.

There are many children in our family, and I am the one who is not taken seriously. The husband is an only child, and the in-laws are open.

When we got married, I felt that my husband was myself and my parents-in-law would not pay for others. Later, I realized that I was another person.

When I first got married, I lived alone and occasionally went to my mother-in-law's house for dinner, but I always bought things for my parents on holidays, birthdays and Chinese New Year.

Later, I found that my mother-in-law was very picky. Whether it's cheap or expensive, throw it away or give it away as long as you don't like it. I don't feel well after knowing.

I am very unhappy that my mind has been treated like this. After that, I reduced the number of times I bought her gifts, limited to birthdays and Chinese New Year, and the standard was lower than that of my parents.

When I was just pregnant after two years of marriage, my husband deliberately said to his in-laws: Mom, you are going to be a grandmother.

She said: Oh, then you will be busy in the future, and there will be many things if you don't have time to sleep late.

Ps: Did I watch too many TV plays? What I expected was, ah, I was happy to say, great, and then I was asked about it.

After that, his parents didn't ask me about the baby. I asked the men and women in the middle. At first I said it might be a girl, but I didn't reply. Later, the baby was coming soon. I said I was a boy, so I asked the clerk to make fish soup, ribs and chicken for me. I said I couldn't finish it, and she said, it's okay. I can't finish the rest.

I prepared everything my mother and I needed to have a baby.

My husband informed his parents on the day my son was born.

The first child was born very slowly, and there was no movement all the time.

At three in the morning, my son was born. In winter, the delivery room is cold with the door open. There are five parturients in the same delivery room, but the doctor didn't close the door. My legs are covered with goose bumps.

After my mother helps wrap the baby, let my mother-in-law get me a cup of brown sugar water! She is arguing with the mother-in-law of the parturient next to her about a pack of tissues.

The nurse said, you can go out and go back to the ward, and there are women who are going to have children behind. My mother held my son in one hand and pushed me out of the delivery room in the other. My feelings for my mother-in-law were completely ruined!

As soon as she left the delivery room, she saw my father-in-law, proudly said her records and said, look, I want my paper back.

When I went back to the delivery room, I couldn't pee, and the bed next to me made me feel like urinating.

My mother said it was too cold to go out. Let's stay in the urinal. After I pee, my husband will take it out for treatment.

My mother-in-law said, don't touch it, it stinks! I was particularly wronged at that time. I finally gave birth to a child. Is it too dirty to cure my urine?

Finally, my mother did it.

After leaving the hospital and going home, my father-in-law said that your mother can't take care of people either. Please accept a new moon. At that time, I thought, hey, it's not bad, it's more reliable at the critical time.

At that time, the Lunar New Year was just popular here, and it was quite expensive. You need to pay first, and then come to the door. My mother transferred the money.

My mother-in-law sat next to her and said, sister-in-law, you see, I don't like to worry either. I'll give you the money when his father comes back.

I went back to my mother's house the next month, and his grandfather gave me 5000 yuan, saying that he would buy something for my son himself. Husband said it was the second month's money.

One year after my mother took care of my baby, my sister-in-law from other places got pregnant and vomited badly, so my mother wanted to take care of my sister-in-law.

Then my parents invited my parents-in-law to have a meal together, let my mother-in-law eat more snacks and help me look after my son.

Mother-in-law said, "Who looks different!" I said, "My mother is going to other places, and I have to go to work. Will you please look after my children when I go to work? "

She said to my husband, "He came to my house when I went to work during the day, and he left when I got off work in the afternoon. He usually picks her up when she is not busy. She can't come to my house by bus for half an hour. She never cares about children on weekends, even if the baby is sick. "

Before giving birth to a second child, she said that she couldn't cook, and she felt sick when she smelled oil smoke. I go home from work to cook, or my husband cooks.

She doesn't like drinking water either. Before going to work, I boiled water and gave her a cup to feed the children. Occasionally forgot to say that she doesn't like drinking water and doesn't remember to feed the children.

After the son was weaned at the age of one, he didn't drink milk powder and rice noodles, and his grandmother didn't do complementary food, so he made do with it.

Eva is always sick and anaemic. She was hospitalized six times a year, but her grandmother never took care of her once. Sit for a while like visiting the sick every time and leave! I still can't forget her.

Because of this, my husband and I quarreled many times, and I told his mother once, but he was still like that.

Later, when I gave birth to a second child, my friend wouldn't let me have a second child. Speaking of which, I had to get angry and finally figured it out.

I want a daughter. The first is to see my husband. I feel that my son is not very worried and unreliable. Second, my husband is so selfish, I think it's all because the only child is spoiled; Third, I want to be my son's companion.

I paid for the second child's new moon, and I haven't mentioned the cost of the new moon until now. On our side, all the mothers-in-law take care of the month, or pay the nanny to take care of the month.

His grandmother doesn't want to see her two children after the second month. She said she cooked and I looked after the children!

I said yes. She can do anything.

I have no time to pick up my mother-in-law because I have a daughter. We live together from Monday to Friday and send her home on weekends.

As long as I am at home, I usually take care of the children's food, drink and housework, and even wash the sheets for his grandmother.

I don't feel tired from work. I just hope my grandmother will be nicer to her children. What I ask of her is that you should be kind to her children. Being kind to my children means being kind to me. I would appreciate it.

She only washes clothes and cooks by herself, and my husband does half.

The daughter and husband are on the second floor, and the mother-in-law and son are on the first floor.

My daughter knows strangers and sleeps lightly. She wakes up at the slightest sign of trouble and cries when she wakes up. Go to bed at nine in the evening and get up at seven or eight in the morning.

At first, there were two of them and the four of us slept upstairs. I hold my daughter and my husband holds my son, but my husband has been holding his mobile phone and playing games before going to bed. He is particularly heavy after falling asleep and doesn't know how to cover the child at night.

My son is weak. He caught a cold several times and was hospitalized twice. When he caught a cold, he gave it to his sister.

After this year, I let my son sleep with his grandmother. I think she is better than my husband. She can take care of the children at night.

But now the problem has arisen. She is used to it and has no patience.

The son is naughty. When he sleeps with his grandmother, he has to eat to fall asleep. Then she said to the child, you can't move? Are you deaf? Look what your mother taught you.

As soon as my son cries, his grandmother says, he will cry, too, so why not become an actor (this is what I heard upstairs).

If I meet her, she will say, your mother is here. Why are you crying so hard? Did I pinch you? Fuck you.

Recently, he makes a hullabaloo about to my son before going to bed every day. When the son cried, he said, "If you cry again, your mother won't come. Your mother can't look at you. Your mother has to watch your sister! "

I heard my son crying downstairs yesterday and asked him, do you want to sleep with your mother? My son agreed!

I took the child upstairs to sleep, and he cried and said he wanted to eat. I said yes, keep your voice down and my sister fell asleep. Just after that, my daughter woke up, crying and making noise, and put both of them to sleep. It's past twelve.

My son woke up at five in the morning, which woke up my sister. My daughter cried for a while because she didn't wake up.

The two children have different schedules, and living together affects their daughter's sleep, so they should be separated for a while, and then live with the two children when their daughter is older and has a good sleep habit.

Mother-in-law will give her son a dark childhood if she does this again.

So I asked my husband to suggest that his mother and I share a room. There is a small bed for his grandmother to sleep in our room, and a curtain is also a small space for her.

She disagreed and said it was inconvenient.

I don't know what to do. I don't want my son to cry himself to sleep every day. Very tangled, I don't know what to do? I want to do my best to give my children the best, children first, and nothing else.

Reply:

Hello, mom, thank you for your letter! Tao Ma can deeply feel your helplessness after reading it. The biggest problem between you is the concept of parenting.

You know, this is a knot that can never be untied. Ha ha! But there are ways to follow!

Let's not talk about the concept of mother-in-law parenting. Take care of our injured little heart first.

You have been neglected by your parents since childhood, and you often buy gifts for your parents' in-laws. I can see that you want to please the elderly, especially your in-laws, but your kindness is often ignored and ungrateful, which makes you very sad.

This is a typical flattering personality, which shows that you are not confident inside, and you have not won the respect of your mother-in-law after your own experiment, right?

But fortunately, since you found out who your mother-in-law is, you have taken corresponding actions, and Mama Tao praised you.

You know, it is more important to know your heart and find your inner feelings than to please others blindly.

It is also important to be the truest self!

It is every woman's nature to love fantasy, but you can't indulge in it every day. Will you often fantasize after pregnancy and add more drama to yourself? Ha ha!

No matter when, we should return to reality and break our illusions, otherwise we will only suffer a lot of injuries and unnecessary blows!

In addition, Mrs. Tao also hopes that you won't project such feelings onto your children too much because you didn't get the care of your parents when you were a child. Sometimes it will make you spoil your children too much, and it will backfire in the end!

Below, Mrs. Tao gives you some suggestions on the concept of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law's parenting, hoping to help you!

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Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law have different parenting concepts, so we must first understand each other. Because only after mutual understanding can we talk about conflicts calmly and find effective solutions.

As for the problem that the mother-in-law takes the baby to sleep at night, tell her mother-in-law not to always instill in the child the words "mom doesn't want you, mom wants to take her sister". Although the child is young, he can understand, which will hurt the baby's young mind invisibly.

2. Bao Dad wants to settle.

It is normal for mother-in-law and daughter-in-law to have differences in parenting. The older generation has the way of parenting, and the daughter-in-law has the concept of parenting.

When there is a problem, Bao Dad should act as a mediator and analyze what is the best way for children from the perspective of scientific parenting. After making a plan, everyone should abide by it. What should a mother-in-law do with her children and daughter-in-law, and how to reduce the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law?

I hope you can play the role of your husband. Mother-in-law doesn't like cooking and housework. You can usually ask Bao Dad to share some of it and let her help with something else.

The expert's words may be more convincing.

Many parenting methods of the older generation have no scientific basis, but the mother-in-law may not believe what Ma Bao said, so it is easy for two people to disagree, so Ma Bao might as well try to get her mother-in-law to agree to listen to the expert's lecture, because it will be more authoritative and her mother-in-law will realize that there may be misunderstandings in her behavior. For example, when the mother-in-law takes the baby to sleep, she always scolds the child's behavior.

Don't treat your mother-in-law as your mother. It is wisest to treat your mother-in-law as your boss.

You can be spoiled in front of your mother, or you can make a splash. Her mother will spoil you when you are spoiled and forgive you when you are splashing, but her mother-in-law will not.

If you say anything, you will be hated by your mother-in-law. Even if it is 99 points, it will be destroyed by this 1 point.

I want to live in harmony with my mother-in-law for a long time, not how close I am. But to grasp the appropriate boundaries.

You can pay your mother-in-law like your own mother, but you can't ask her to be tolerant of you like a mother to her daughter, or you will have to ask for it.

The "mother-in-law" between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law can only do their own half, and can't ask for anything in return, otherwise they will be disappointed.

Since you want to be disappointed, it is better not to expect too much, keep a proper distance and give your mother-in-law enough courtesy and respect.

Having said that, in a word, Mrs. Tao hopes that you can slowly explore your own parenting concept and get along well with your mother-in-law. I hope the four suggestions given by mother Tao can help you!