What if an octogenarian doesn't go to his children's house or ask a nanny to live by himself?

I worked as a nanny in Shanghai. I met an old man in his 90s, whose children are all rich. I met you too.

Unwilling to go to the child's house to hire a nanny proves that she has the ability to take care of herself.

That day, I accompanied her 70-year-old daughter to see her. She is washing clothes and cooking by herself. I lifted the lid and saw her breakfast. There are six beautiful cups in a big steamer. The old man was happy to show off to me: "I'll take it." Look what I ate, half a sea cucumber, two red dates, five silver almonds, a steamed egg and a small bowl of miscellaneous grains porridge. " An apple, two walnuts and three nuts were washed next to it. The old man enjoyed it skillfully and orderly.

After dinner, the old man still took my hand and showed me her book case. I saw a pile of calligraphy on it, and I was ashamed. The old man said, I still have many things to do today, such as exercise, writing, reading, lunch and dinner. She kept her daughter out of it.

The old man has a clear head. I said, "Come with us to your daughter's house, so you don't have to do everything yourself."

The old man said, "What is filial piety? You think it's good for me to hire a nanny, follow me around, follow me in the bathroom, just like watching a dog. I think this is a kind of pain, I don't have my own space. "

"What is happiness? Although everyone is rich, if I am really sick, no amount of money can buy my illness. I do my own thing, so I feel there is some value in living. To live is to live a good spirit! "

"Who is better than my own home? I have lived in this house for decades, and I can feel where my things are with my eyes closed. Going to someone else's home is someone else's home, which will only add chaos to others, then I am even more uncomfortable. "

If the old man has such an idea, he is really glad that she has a good figure. Why do you say that an old man can raise several children and several children can't raise an old man? Old people have their own independent thinking. If she thinks her lifestyle is the best way to make her happy, let her go. Her children call her twice a day and often visit her, no problem. Old people are happy and free and feel valuable. I think this is filial piety!

Let's talk about the pension situation of the elderly over 80 years old in our unit: there are many elderly over 80 years old now, and there are 40 or 50 in our hospital alone. There are mainly some pension countries. 1 is for the nanny. There is an 85-year-old master Xu. He has a son and a daughter, both abroad. He said: it is not easy for children to come back, and many problems will be involved. They don't want to live abroad, thinking that they have different living habits, no language and no familiar living environment. I found a full-time 60-year-old nanny to accompany me around, visit the park, buy food, cook and wash clothes. Sleep in a room at night, take care of Master Xu's daily life, see a doctor, take medicine, clean up the housework and so on. There is also a master Yang, whose son works in a foreign country and his daughter works in a foreign company. They were too busy to take care of their father, and they also hired an all-weather nanny for the elderly, and the working conditions were similar to those in front; There is also an old lady Ma, who is 89 years old and still in good health. She has six children and a boy. The eldest is over 70 years old and the youngest daughter is over 50 years old. Supposedly, the children are retired, so you can take turns to take care of your mother or one of them! However, my mother doesn't want to live with her children. She told her friends: Some children are almost 70 years old, and they are in poor health and can't take care of me at all. Some husbands have cerebral infarction, and some mothers-in-law have patients and can't leave home. My son's children work abroad, get married and have children, and need to be taken care of. After retirement, they went abroad to take care of their granddaughter, and one daughter also took care of the third generation. Only one person has the energy and time, and her mother doesn't want to be with her. I am afraid of what will happen in the future, and I will easily get into trouble. Finally chose to live with the nanny.

2. Living with children. There are quite a few of these. Two of them married their grandchildren and lived with their sons and daughters-in-law. Generally speaking, they go out for a walk after breakfast, and then chat with some old people. 1 1 Go home for lunch. Take a lunch break after dinner, come out in the afternoon, chat for a while, go home at five, watch TV after dinner, and go to bed around eight. There are several houses lacking, living together. There are also some who take their children to school, and there are also many. Most of them are old ladies, taking their children to and from school, buying food and cooking. Their health is basically good.

3. Live in a nursing home. Not much. One is for both children. My son has been living in his parents' house since he got married. Now his parents are old and in poor health, so he can only take care of them. My daughter's family is in good condition. The couple are too busy to work hard for their careers. They go there to live, and they are basically at home alone. I feel lonely living in my big house. Therefore, I choose to live in a nursing home. One is the death of mother and the dementia of father. After working at home, he was afraid that his father would get lost and sent him to a nursing home.

4. Relatively more is home-based care for the elderly. Can account for more than half. Among them, one third are elderly people and two thirds are elderly women. Most of them don't travel far, mainly for activities, chatting and walking in the hospital. Few people still like painting and writing.

Different situations, different practices, there is no right or wrong!

Personally, I feel that it is inconvenient to live in a child's house. First, there is a big gap between the living habits of the two generations. Most elderly people sleep less, go to bed early and get up early, while young people like to stay up late and play mobile phones in bed. Old people like to be vegetarian and soft. Young people like to taste, chew and eat a combination of meat and vegetables. Old people like to eat by the hour, while young people eat by the hour because of the first rule. After a long time, it is easy to produce contradictions. Second, the old people care about different things from the young people. They care about many different things, and there are relatively few languages. Third, if there is more than one child, after a long time, you care more and he cares less. It is easy to have opinions with each other, which leads to discord between children. One more thing, being together is a little controlled, and the freedom of movement will be worse. Based on this, I think it is better for the elderly to live independently as long as they have the ability of their own activities and have no major physical problems. A little farther away, the children are free, come and see, get together, and have a lively and harmonious atmosphere; There is something to help solve; You can help in time by saying hello. This distance is much better than being together! Hiring a nanny is not an appropriate way. Hire a nanny when you are in good health, which is basically out of the working environment. When we are old, if we don't work, we will lack opportunities for activities and reduce the amount of exercise. Let's look at those who live long in the countryside. Basically, they have been working all their lives. If they strengthen their physique at work, reduce distractions, keep a simple mind and be happy, they will be healthy. Lack of labor, leisure, easy to think about the past and the future, much distraction is not good for health! This is a ... Moreover, being with a nanny is easy to increase the distance with children and damage family ties. An article on the Internet said that after an old man died, he gave his property and articles to the nanny and only gave the child one yuan. Although this is understandable, especially when children lack filial piety, it is inevitable that the elderly will be angry for a while and be ill-considered. However, it will leave pain and anxiety for future generations! Although from the perspective of the elderly, living independently has certain advantages. From the child's point of view, it may be a little hard. Afraid of others' comments and parents' unhappiness. I thought to myself: children should let nature take its course, be filial, be filial, be filial, and the key point is obedience. Just support what the old people want to do. Of course, don't let go after supporting, care more, greet more, contact more, go home and see more, spend more time with your parents, don't wait to be filial, filial to the elderly and care for your children. Set an example for your child and feel at ease! This is my opinion, please advise my friends!

I support the behavior of the elderly. Because it shows that the elderly are healthy and have no Alzheimer's disease or other diseases. Old people prefer living alone to living with their children and nannies for the following reasons. First, the elderly eat less, eat regularly, eat soft food, and like thin soup and rotten rice. Moreover, children like to eat stir-fried dishes, stews and other foods, and the elderly and children can't finish them all. Second, three or four generations of children live together, and the elderly are not used to it, especially when children are beaten and scolded by their parents because of work or other things. The old people are very uncomfortable after reading it, and everyone knows the pain of the next generation. In this case, the old people don't care, no matter what, the situation will be very embarrassing. Third, the elderly themselves are relatively independent and like to be quiet. Some people find living in the front particularly inconvenient, while others are not suitable. So I think that if the elderly are healthy, have no problems, can take care of themselves and be filial to their parents, then listen to their opinions and let them live by themselves. Children can use the morning and evening or rest time to buy some foods that the elderly like to eat, visit the elderly and see what requirements the elderly need to solve. The good health of the elderly is also the blessing of their children. It is a good thing to kill two birds with one stone and can reduce the occurrence of many family conflicts.

What if an octogenarian doesn't go to his children's house or ask a nanny to live by himself?

The 80-year-old man lives alone. As a child, I am really worried. I think it's best to have a child to live with the elderly. If it is inconvenient, even often, other children often take turns to buy some vegetables and daily necessities for the elderly, so that the elderly will not feel lonely and will not get old easily. We made it at home.

This is a wise old man. In fact, when people are old, as long as the body allows, they generally like their quiet feeling. In particular, I don't want to leave the old house where he has lived for decades. Everything there is his beautiful memories and thoughts, and every corner has a different story.

The old man raised his children, and now they all go to the society to pursue their dreams. They are busy with work every day, but they can't forget their elderly parents. It is also a kind of filial piety to bring them around. However, sensible old people know that it is not easy for young people. If they go, it will only add to the trouble. Good children may try their best to arrange the daily life of the elderly, while bad children may cause family conflicts. Therefore, it is better to live a happy life with more peace of mind and more freedom when you can take care of yourself. If you are not used to having a nanny in front of you, and you are used to saving your life, it is not cost-effective to find a nanny of several thousand yuan.

If the elderly are healthy and have no serious diseases in their own lives, they can be managed by mobile phones or video surveillance systems like children. Go back and visit them when you have time, help them solve all the difficulties in their daily lives, and prepare daily necessities such as rice, noodles and oil. It is also necessary to communicate with him more about his physical condition and prepare the medicine he needs. Some big cities have also installed emergency pagers for the elderly, which has increased the insurance factor. An old man from a friend's home went back to his hometown in the countryside and planted some vegetables and other crops to send back photos. They are very happy.

In short, it is most important for the elderly to be happy every day. I wish your old man health and happiness!

Everyone's life is dignified. Learning to respect the wishes of the elderly is actually more difficult than simple filial piety.

1, now the living standard in China has improved, the life expectancy in China has been prolonged, and there are more and more long-lived elderly people. If you are 80 years old and healthy, you can take care of yourself, especially if your wife is there. Of course, you want to live alone. If the wife has left, one can do whatever one wants, and children should respect the wishes of the elderly. It's just that if it is possible to visit the elderly regularly every day, if they have any needs, I can help them.

2. From the perspective of the elderly, although a person's life is a little lonely, he has greater freedom. Especially when I am old, some living and eating habits have their own rules and hobbies. When you get to the children's house, you have to adapt to the children, so you are not so free. As for a person's life, old people with a little active thoughts can also live a delicious life. Now the network is developed and the information is sufficient. As long as they are willing to contact the society, the life of the elderly can be as colorful as ever.

3. As children, we should always communicate with the elderly and understand their thoughts. If the old man wants to be alone, let her/him be free. If the elderly are willing to see their children once or twice a week, or if their children visit them every day, their wishes will be met. The wish to accompany the elderly is the best filial piety.

As for asking the nanny to live with the elderly, it's just that the elderly can't take care of themselves. If you have to hire a nanny, it is not the best choice for the elderly. Speaking of nannies, our country really wants to take the professional training and cultivation of nannies as real vocational education. Frankly speaking, the current nanny has done a lot of good work just to make money, and it can't be said that it is unreasonable, but seriously, it is just a job, lacking empathy and heartfelt love. So the nanny's attitude and behavior towards the elderly can be imagined.

5. Let's talk about the problem of the elderly. Scientific research shows that with the increase of age, people's cerebellum begins to shrink, so their thinking and behavior will be affected. For example, the old people began to think about simple problems, stuck to their own opinions, were not easy to accept other people's opinions, and went their own way regardless of their children's feelings. Therefore, children and the elderly often have unhappy times. The child thinks that the old man has changed ... The old man thinks that the child is wrong. These are all caused by insufficient brain cell function, so we must understand and tolerate the elderly and children more.

Everyone will get old. Today we should understand and tolerate the elderly more, and tomorrow our children will understand and tolerate us better.

Nowadays, many people in their eighties don't go to their children's homes or hire nannies, so they can only stay at home by themselves. As a child, I will definitely be worried, but the elderly also have their own ideas, so I will talk about my own ideas.

Although I am old, I am healthy, I can take care of myself and my legs and feet are handy. Usually, if you want to cook, you can cook. If you don't want to cook, you can eat in the restaurant downstairs. There is a washing machine to wash clothes, and there is not much work at home. Children often come when they are free, buy me rice and oil, and help me clean my room. I don't think it's necessary to hire a nanny.

The children also advised me to live with them. I don't want to. I just want to stay at home. I feel very at ease. I can lie down if I want, and go downstairs if I want. I don't care. It is different from some habits of their lives. I'm a little deaf. I like watching TV at a high volume, otherwise I can't hear clearly. They were so shocked by their ears. Some things can still be used, so throw them away. I said they are.

So I think it's better to stay at home. When I really can't move, I will consider whether to hire a nanny or go to the children's house.

In their eighties, children will have grandchildren, some great-grandchildren, usually four generations under one roof, and some five generations under one roof. People in their eighties were influenced by the old society and didn't like young people wasting food. Some things are not good to nag or not nag, and no one listens. Secondly, the old man has lived in the countryside all his life and is used to freedom. The gates in the city are closed and the garbage is not used to it. Even some people are not free to cough and spit. Are you comfortable living with their children?

The author's idea is that taking care of yourself, cooking and living alone is the best policy when the body allows activities. It is not that children are not good, because children have jobs and children are under pressure. It is human nature to give them less trouble. Understand and understand children's difficulties.

Of course, when you can't move, you can rely on your children or hire a nanny.

Hehe, sit in the right place at once: If I can live to be over 80 and take care of myself, I will definitely not go to my children's house or relatives' house, but if economic conditions permit, I will hire a nanny to accompany me.

In old age, what can be more important than health, safety, comfort, worry-free and labor-saving? !

Therefore, it is suggested that hiring a nanny is the best choice for those elderly people.

Today, China is entering an aging age. With the improvement of living standards and medical conditions, people's average life expectancy is getting longer and longer, and there are not a few elderly people who live a long and healthy life.

Most of the old people in the city have pensions and housing, and they are used to being free. It is wise not to live with their children when they can take care of themselves.

But after all, when you are old, accidents or diseases may happen at any time. In addition, I am a little bored or can't cook. No one around to look after, the child must not be at ease. They often have their own homes, jobs and children around the elderly, and they can't afford to run at both ends. And some children are far away and tired. It is also a last resort for children to ask the elderly to live with themselves.

Old people are often reluctant to part with their own nests, fearing that they can't live with their children, resulting in conflicts, or because of different living and eating habits, they feel inconvenient, so they are unwilling to go.

The old man's idea is realistic and correct. As long as I can take care of myself, I am also in favor of the elderly living by themselves.

Under such circumstances, first, it is necessary for children to visit their parents in turn on a regular basis, or to call their parents every day to ask about the situation and follow up.

I have seen some children install remote monitoring for their parents and their own homes, and they can see every move of the elderly at any time. This method is very good and worth popularizing.

The second is to do ideological work for the elderly and find nanny services. When the elderly have enough savings or pensions, they should change their ideas and don't value money more than hard work.

Is it not good to spend money on comfort and health, so that children can worry less and suffer less?

The old man doesn't agree to find someone to wait on him, but is worried about money, even if her own pension is enough for the nanny's salary and living expenses.

If the child reimburses the nanny's salary, the old man's salary only pays the living expenses, or the old man doesn't have to pay the living expenses at all. I'm sure the old man can readily agree to hire a nanny.

Or simply hire a nanny, maybe the old man will resist at first, but as long as the children make up their minds, the old man will gradually accept the reality.

I have seen several such examples. Of course, the salary cards of the elderly are in the hands of some children. The old man began to make noise, and later accepted and got used to the care of the nanny. After all, he is lonely, so he can chat with the nanny to relieve boredom.

The third is to ask neighbors, relatives and friends who live close to each other to help look after them, or to ask the community or property for help.

Visit the elderly at least one day or the next, and leave your children's contact information for timely notification.

In a word, accidents and diseases can happen at any time for the elderly living alone in their 80s, so we must not take them lightly.

Look at the physical condition of the old man. If he/she is temporarily healthy, let him/her live by himself. If he/she is in poor health, even if he/she can barely take care of himself, he/she can't do whatever he wants. If he/she needs a nanny, he/she has to. In this way, children can rest assured that the elderly themselves are safer.