Talk about funny things that are out of tune.

1, friend, are you swollen? Have your moral integrity been erased?

Your apology has nothing to do with me, so please don't bother me.

I don't want you to be with me. If you want to leave, you can just go.

4. Play when it is time to play and stop when it is time to stop. Don't let yourself play too crazy.

Don't take my love for you as an excuse to hurt me, and don't forget that I can leave at any time.

6. Being used by others proves that you are still valuable.

Since you are friends, don't just be your shield. I have no obligation.

I am in a bad mood today. I'll just say four sentences, including the first two. I quit.

9. Life is to live, or to wait for death. Otherwise, what can we wait for in the end?

10, no matter how capable you are, can you stand loneliness?

1 1, it's not that I am humble in front of you, just because I love you so much.

12, in the future, I won't be unreasonable to you, because you are no longer worth it.

13, I don't like you, swinging on both sides.

14, no matter how handsome you are, in my eyes, you are just a dog's tail grass

15, while alive, hurry to meet the people you meet, because there is no chance when you die.

16, do you still remember the age of our 2B? Forget what you have forgotten.

17, did you miss the hint given by the beautiful guys in those years? I really deserve to be single if I miss it.

18. What will happen if a man is pregnant? I've been struggling

19, in my opinion, you are the most suitable spokesperson for 2B youth.

20, I can tolerate your figure is fake, but

2 1 How did the cow die? Be blown up

22. Never laugh too much. Laugh too much and you will get pregnant.

23. Girl, where is your moral integrity? Can you be a little more conservative?

24. My friend owes me 5 yuan, and the tone is that he is not going to pay it back.

25. After breaking up, I will still miss you in Tomb-Sweeping Day every year.

What's wrong with you being thin? I am very fat. Just my own style.

27. The laziest thing for a friend to blow himself up is to give up treatment.

Life has been so hard. If you pretend to force me to go to Mashan again, I will chop you to death.

29. You let me drink water every time I get sick. Do you think I am a bucket?

Even if I am poor, I don't want to ask anyone.

3 1, attitude determines everything, and strength defends dignity.

32. It is the heart that is dirty, not the world.

Thank you for showing up in my world and teaching me how to live with a mask.

I've been with you for a long time, and I like joking more and more.

35. Beauty is your life, and living beautifully is my skill.

36. I just keep you in my heart. I just love you all the time. What can you do to me?

37. Love at first sight, the clock is not love, but a face.

38. If you don't treat yourself well these days, you will live in vain.

39. I don't lack love, but your departure made me lack habits.

40. Do you think I'm in the way? You don't know it's not that easy to come to my world.

4 1, you said you were lonely, but I think you are just bored.

42. Don't spit ivory from the dog's mouth. You are not a dog. Can you spit it out?

Don't criticize others behind their backs. Do you think everyone else is as stupid as you?

44, just too boring, I will put you in my heart so deep.

45. I said that I could forget, just like a meteor across the sky, leaving no trace.

46. Feelings don't need to be felt, and deep love doesn't need to be shown off.

47. A good brother's life is to do anything? Who is so stupid?

48. Don't be sentimental about me, my sister is heartless.

49. If love is not crazy, it is not true love.

50. Ugly people will be loved, and beautiful people will be rejected.

Talk about the funny mood.

1. If my life is a movie, you are a pop-up advertisement.

2. If I am not at home, I will be in the Internet cafe; If I'm not in the Internet cafe, I'm on my way to the Internet cafe!

Love is a road, friends are pigs, and there is only one road for people, but there are many pigs on the road.

I want to be a wing bird in the sky and a pig on the ground!

If you were a flower, cows wouldn't dare to shit in the future.

6. I usually forget to scold you. You didn't know you were both civil and military until you hit him.

7. Eat tofu with meat, and eat meat with tofu; Only when there is no tofu and no meat will you miss someone.

8. Dare to curse me for buying instant noodles without seasoning packets? I curse you for buying instant noodles with only seasoning packets!

9. The price of the tomb has risen so fast that I can't afford to die.

10, finally got up the courage to send her a text message to express her confession. Three minutes later, the head teacher called: Son, this is no joke.

She is as aggressive in bed as she is under the bed!

12, she said: I want to play with feelings, not your organs!

13, Xtep goes down every day, unhappy every day, not studying well, down every day, invincible every day, and no one can resist it.

14, we always have endless work, endless tests, endless grievances, endless fat, endless shit, endless SB. Because of these, it is called life.

15, donated blood in the school square, 200CC gave a pair of manicure equipment, 400CC gave a watch. A MM in the next class felt very happy when she heard about it. She ran to the nurse and asked: What is 1000CC for? The nurse said quietly, send a coffin.

16, my relationship with my wife is like the high-speed rail and the Ministry of Railways. She exists to build your future. No, if I cheat, she will dare to bury me.

17. Is life easy in Guangzhou? Monday 30C, Tuesday 25C, Wednesday 19C, Thursday 17C, Friday 12C, Saturday 8C and Sunday 4C. What if we walk through spring, summer, autumn and winter in one week? So if you find a friend in Guangzhou suddenly lost news, then he may be: 1, freezing to death; 2, hot to death; 3, hot and cold alternate and tired.

18, you are not a VIp, not even a V, you are just a P.

19, your complex facial features can't hide your simple IQ.

20, on a whim, take your photo as a desktop, and TMD actually got a computer virus.

Funny, funny, talk about mood phrases

1, you are showing off in an ostentatious manner with your sisters. Do you believe me?

2. My sister gave birth to a washing machine. Dude, just dump it.

3. Spend money at school and work time.

If a man doesn't help you put on the wedding dress, you can give him a cassock.

I took a fancy to you because I was out of my mind, and now my brain is shaking dry.

6. People who can't lose weight are always in turmoil, and people who don't eat fat are fearless.

7. Your appearance is not accurate and your proportion is not good.

8. I have a heart to lose weight, but I live a life of eating goods.

9, clothes, it has two ways of washing, washing yourself and washing others.

10, who says I don't know anything? Let Shi and Dong Shi stand in front of me and have a try.

1 1. Have the ability to study atomic bombs, but have no ability to study tea eggs.

12, save water and try to take a shower with your girlfriend.

13, don't do anything wrong and spill all the dirty water on yourself. I have to save it for flushing the toilet.

14, I am arrogant and petty, so you can't afford to be hurt.

15, don't tell me to grow old together, I want to have black hair forever.

On the train, a white woman and a black woman are nursing their baby. Mom, mom, white baby, don't be a coquette. I want to drink chocolate milk, too.

17, you are the first song in my heart, which always makes me thrilling.

18, if one day I become a pervert, please don't forget that I am innocent.

19. How many children have been hurt by exams, and how many honest children have learned to cheat?

20, phoenix rebirth is nirvana, pheasant rebirth is corpse change.

2 1, I just found out that the way to attract a man is to make him never get it; The way to attract a woman is just the opposite, that is, to satisfy her.

22. Clear water makes no fish. If a man is cheap, he is invincible.

23, who is whose husband, are fucking temporary workers.

Funny personality. Talk about girls' wit and fun.

1, girls with big breasts all have neuropathy, because the peripheral nerves are necrotic and the upper edge is enlarged.

There is a kind of love called "I don't care" and a kind of love called "I'm unlucky".

There are two factors that hinder my success: one is that I will feel sleepy when I am full, and the other is that I will be hungry when I wake up.

4. Ask me about my weight? Just kidding, real fat people never get on the scale!

5. Mosquitoes are gods. If you don't buy some mosquito-repellent incense to burn, it will sting you all the time.

6. If you think all the gods are floating clouds, you are heartless enough.

7. Every success is aborted by failure.

8. Looking back now, I feel that there will be a big wave of zombies coming in soon, but I haven't even planted sunflowers yet …

9. I once passed a man, and he was so full of sparks that he almost moved a brick.

10, even if you die, you must leave a widow for this world.

1 1, it's lonely without lovers and enemies.

12, looks determine fate, no wonder my fate is so bumpy.

13, the real trust is that you say: I fart, she will never cover her nose.

14, ideal life: drink eight-treasure porridge, eat eight-treasure rice, taste eight-treasure tea and sleep eight-treasure mountain.

15, men's meticulous attraction is second only to women's nudity.

16, often wet the bed when I was a child, and often cry when I grow up.

17. Why does the rain have to stay with me when I don't have an umbrella?

18, DOTA ruined his life, and Warcraft was poor for three generations. If you don't touch these two, you will become Gao Fushuai.

19, the early bird doesn't necessarily get the worm. It is likely that the overnight bird arrived first.

20. When you are alive, you will be laughed at by others first, then smile at others, and then die with a smile.

2 1. If there is an afterlife, I want to make a quilt, either lying in bed or basking in the sun.

22. I'm so busy these days that my hair is beginning to fall out. My friend comforted me that it was a season change, and I always felt that it was very likely to stop production.

23, alas! Now there are more and more billionaires, and I only have one hundred million, or memories!

24. Are you a boy or a girl? I wonder whether I want to be an aunt or an uncle.

25. I recently read a book that taught people how to forget and benefited a lot. I forgot the title and content.

26. When the house grows, it will naturally sprout if it stays in the depths; Meng reached the limit and got married easily and continued his marriage with others.

27, the most familiar stranger, makeup ex-girlfriend, married boyfriend.

28. The most difficult thing is that women, an animal, have to put some blood every month.

29. It's quick for the child to admit his mistake, but it's just fucking wrong.

There is nothing to rely on in this world, only I can rely on it. Abbreviation: shit ...

3 1, the most tragic thing in the world is that after opening the wallet, Chairman Mao is gone and people of all ethnic groups are still there.

32. In that distant place, there is a slow sheep. Hey, hey, go home for dinner …

33. Hello, everyone. My full English name is "follow your heart" ... my full Chinese name is "Xun" ...

34. Li Bai was about to go by boat when he suddenly heard singing on the shore. Making a scene is the most dazzling national style.

35. I am a very principled person. My principle is only three words, depending on the mood.

I said don't do whatever you want, it won't happen again, it will lead to crime.

37. Fat people's favorite line to hear when watching martial arts movies should be that sentence: "Be thin!"

38. But gold always shines. There is gold everywhere. I don't know which one I am.

39. Next time a boy laughs at your thick legs. Just answer him: your legs are thin, and all three legs are thin.

40. A day is short. Laugh when you are happy, and laugh when you are unhappy.

4 1, falling in love for the purpose of not getting married is to raise a wife for others.

42. Twinkling stars, the toilet is really clean. It is put in the museum as an exhibit, just like your little eyes. ...

43. It is said that long hair and short knowledge. I haven't seen many children born to nuns and monks with high IQ …

44. Jiangshan is so arrogant and people are so sentimental.

45. Why do you want to embarrass me? You think you're a palette?

46. Every girl is an angel who has never shed tears. How can you break my wings?

47. My future mother-in-law, let me know your daughter quickly.

48. The most painful thing in the world is to sleep well and be awakened by urine.

49. What makes me proud and proud is that until now, the earth is still being trampled by me.

50. Laoyue, can Nima stop holding my hand with inferior red lines? It breaks down every once in a while.