A letter to my sister-in-law-we are the closest family!

Is everything all right at home? I am the eldest sister, and the reason why I want to say the following words to you is because we are a family!

It's hard for me to say these words in person. It may sound hard for you to accept, so I want to tell you about my family in this way.

First of all, our family's conditions are really poor, and it's really wronged that you didn't provide good material conditions for your marriage. I am also someone else's daughter-in-law, so I can understand your feelings. Parents can only build a few bungalows for you with their ability not to be afraid of hardship and fatigue. Listen to mom, you live on the second floor now. When it was built last year, you and Liang also paid for it.

So, I thank you very much. You're normal, too. I hired jiaozi that day, so you have to help me quickly. I always see it in my eyes. Actually, I envy you. Don't be angry. Your three children are cuter than anyone else. They are our family and your greatest wealth! Although parents have no ability to get rich, we can't deny that they are the most hardworking parents. As long as you can still move, support yourself with your own hands and do your best not to burden your children! In fact, mom wanted to be bright, but she didn't call Liang for fear that something would happen to you two.

Your second sister and I are not so lucky at this point. As you know, I have no mother-in-law. Although my father-in-law is younger than my father, he is in poor health and suffers from depression. He needs comfort and enlightenment all day, not to mention working to make money. Therefore, your brother-in-law and I should not only make money to build a house and support our father-in-law, but also enlighten and encourage him frequently. He is the father, and we have obligations, even though we often feel stressed. For various reasons, we are both in our thirties and have no children of our own. Your second sister is deaf and dumb. Her parents-in-law are over 70 years old. She is in poor health and can't help your second sister at all. She still needs their support. So she took two children alone and had no money to buy clothes for them. Most of them wear the clothes worn by our children, and she is very satisfied with the clothes given by our family.

Therefore, we are less than the upper class and more than the lower class. My parents, with their only efforts, try to make this family better.

But I don't know why. Every time I come home, you don't talk much. I can only Doby, son. I don't have children of my own, so I really like my three children who love you very much, and I think you can feel it, too. Actually, we are the closest. Your second sister is deaf and dumb, so I can't communicate with her. The rest is you. But every time I go home, I always feel that you seem dissatisfied with me, so you should express your resistance through silence and unhappiness. In fact, we are sisters and we can communicate with each other. I hope that through communication, there will be no more barriers between us. All my original intentions are to make this family harmonious and warm. Children grow up in a positive and healthy environment. Although there is no money, we are all trying to move forward. I am also working hard, on the one hand, I want to make my life better, on the other hand, I have to be able to bear the responsibility of supporting my parents!

Actually, there are two things I want to talk to you about.

The first point is to get along with parents.

Mom is not a particular person. Cooking is careless and not so meticulous, which really makes you feel wronged. And every time you go upstairs, your room is clean and tidy, and the children's clothes are changed every day. These are all the places I need to learn from you.

My parents are old, and many concepts and practices are different from ours. But one thing, I think we need to reach an understanding that parents really care about you because we are a family. Do you remember the last time I went to the city with my mother to buy clothes? I ate a big plate of chicken at noon, but my mother couldn't bear to eat meat. Most of her food is potatoes. She wants to bring some meat and soup back to her family. When she came back, she still wanted a second meal before she finished eating the noodles. I clearly see that you are unhappy, and I understand it very well, so I also talked about her. The frugality of the elderly is beyond our comprehension.

I still remember buying cooked meat and cold dishes to eat at night when I came back. When you are upstairs alone, mom quickly sets aside some meat and vegetables for the children to take upstairs for you. And the fruit I bought this time. When the mother wants to take it out to eat, she must let the children take some upstairs first. Admittedly, this is nothing valuable, but I have you in my heart, whether I please you or I really care about you. She just wants you to be happy. As you know, my mother is a real person, who can't speak well and has no mind. Only you can be happy at home and don't give her a hard time. No matter how busy and tired she is, she will feel very comfortable. Actually, so am i. When I got home, I saw that you were not unhappy. I say hello to you, you can respond enthusiastically, and I will be very happy and talk more. Of course, when we are all sad or unhappy, we should vent, but as long as we think that they are elders and they are working hard for this family, how can we have the heart to say anything that hurts them?

Actually, I really feel sorry for my parents. Dad's previous job was to work by a fire with a temperature of more than 3,000 degrees. Although it is hot, he can earn more than 2000 yuan a month, and he will never be willing to delay. After finishing the work in the factory, he was busy with the work in the field. You can't imagine my sadness and self-blame when I watched him sleep at home for only 4 or 5 hours and then get busy again. I blame myself for being so incompetent that they have to work hard here! Dad is now over 60 and will not work in the factory, so he went to see the door. Although it's less than 1200 yuan, the doorman of our village school can't do it, so he goes to the people's market to look for a job and starts looking for a job after 5 o'clock every day. If the young man doesn't do it, he will do it as long as he pays. However, he is over 60 years old. 10 For many years, he has had the problem of defecation seven or eight times a day, and his blood pressure is high. He didn't stop taking the medicine. That's why I tried to find him a lighter job in Z city, but he has other business in other places and can't go far. Later, the village school next door had to watch the door, and he went again. Although he has less money, he is stable and relaxed.

Mother planted trees and weeds in the river all summer and got a tan. As you know, she goes out at 6 o'clock every day and comes back at 7 o'clock in the evening, so I want to find a job for her in Z city, so that she can earn some money without wind and rain. But mom is worried that you are unhappy, because Liang is also working outside, and if the child is sick, you can't take care of it. I think, after all, dad's place is not far from home. It should be helpful for you to work 24 hours a day and come back. Actually, I'm worried, too After all, dad lives in the school and watches the door, leaving you. So, I also know that mom coming out is not the best choice. Mom has been worried that the monthly salary of 1200 yuan can't support the family expenses, and now there is no need for people to plant trees in the river. You had to help your child with his homework and didn't go to work, so she kept talking about looking for a job, but she was afraid to come to Zhengzhou. To tell the truth, at our parents' age, why do you want to work so much and don't want to rest? They just want to do it while they can still do some work, and don't bother us!

Objectively speaking, dad's monthly salary 1200 is very small, not to mention trying to save some money, except for the expenses at home and the money for taking medicine.

I remember the last time I was at home, probably at the end of August. My mother and I slept in the same bed that night. There is no quilt on her bed, only a list. It's too cold for me to sleep. Later you brought me a quilt and slept for a while, although we didn't even turn on the electric fan. I have been listening to the hum of the air conditioner in your room until dawn. I especially want to tell you that I will turn off the air conditioner when it's not hot, but my mother won't let me say it for fear that you will be unhappy.

When I got home, I told my mother about the three-bedroom and one-bedroom house we shared, and all three rooms were free. I just paid the electricity bill 1 700 yuan money for half a year on September 26th, and I paid it to 350 yuan after the two rooms split equally. Mom said that she had just paid the electricity bill of 254 for one month, and I was surprised at that time. I can't watch TV at my mother's house because we only have 1 empty sets and then the washing machine. At this point, mom never said anything, because she didn't want to make you unhappy. It's just that I think we are a family and can be completely honest. Open it when it is hot, open it when it is cold, and close it when it is cold. The electricity bill is our own, and the savings are also our own. It is not easy for them to make money. Even if we don't pay the electricity bill, we have always advocated energy conservation, don't you think?

Last time I finished my farm work, I called my father. Dad said that you also went to the field to break corn, and his tone revealed various compliments to you. When I went home this time, my mother also told me about you breaking corn. Every time you warm your heart, she is very happy and wants to tell me several times. Actually, I can also think from your standpoint. You have to worry about whether Liang is at home or not, and there will always be resentment in your heart. Let's think from the standpoint of parents. They are old and incapable. They can only work for this family. As long as they have jobs, they will work hard. Because they can subsidize their families, they also want to make our conditions better. However, under the existing conditions, they can only rely on selling their physical strength, although their age is really no longer young!

Therefore, as long as we can understand the parents' good intentions towards their children, including Nanxiang's uncles and aunts, they must be the same as their parents and hope that we will have a good life. In fact, as long as we understand this, they are practicing with actions (efforts). How can we have the heart to give them a hard time? Because we will also be their role in the future-to be in-laws. Right?

The second point is the education of children.

Actually, I don't have much say in this either, because I haven't been a mother. Only in my growing experience, I feel that my childhood experience has a great influence on my personality! The phrase "character determines fate" was once thought to be grandiose, but it proved to be true. Cheerful and confident personality will make us dare to think and do. If we all think that we can't get into a first-class university, it's normal to go to a third-rate university! We define ourselves in a very low position, so we can't climb very high! My lack of self-confidence also made my life today!

At work, I feel more and more inadequate. I'm not good at talking, I have no talent and I can't show myself. I said the same thing, unremarkable; Colleagues say it is merit. This doesn't sound boastful, but it shows the results completely. There is no suspense in choosing someone else or me when evaluating performance salary increase. The character cultivated since childhood has widened the gap between people bit by bit!

Parents' words and deeds and spirit always affect their children. Parents' love, family members' harmony, harmonious atmosphere, tolerance, parents' optimism and happy mood will make children feel love and warmth. Parents and children respect and care for each other, and children are also willing to associate with others, thus forming an optimistic, open-minded and cheerful personality, which is helpful for children's life and growth. On the other hand, if the family atmosphere is tense, children will be on tenterhooks all day, feel insecure, become unconfident and at a loss.

If parents are more democratic, children will be independent, bold, smart and good at interacting and helping others; Too strict, often beat and scold, the child is stubborn or lacks self-confidence.

Parents are the best teachers for children, and everything we say and do has a subtle influence on children. We actively create a learning atmosphere and children will be influenced by us. We should also attach importance to equality in communication with children. Children are not our appendages. Any unequal words and deeds will distort the relationship between people, and it will be difficult to handle interpersonal relationships correctly when you grow up. We should treat children in an equal tone, respect their wishes, discuss with them more in advance, force them to do things they don't like in a less commanding tone, and give them more freedom of choice.

That's what I want to talk to you about. It is because we are a family that we need to communicate frankly. If there is anything you want to tell me, I am especially willing to accept it, and I will consciously change what I have done badly. I believe that it is our common wish to make this family better and better and create a healthy and happy environment for children to grow up! Take care of yourself!

Big sister who loves this family.

20 17. 10.06