Have you ever been insulted in a joking manner? How to deal with it?

Then let’s talk about Jiang Xin and Sun Li first. In fact, those who have watched that episode of Happy Camp know that Jiang Xin was too into the drama. On Happy Camp, she jokingly called Sun Li a bitch many times. Although Sun Li didn't get angry at the time, it could be seen from her expression that she was very embarrassed.

Maybe Jiang Xin herself is not aware of her problem, but Sun Like said that she always screams like this, and sometimes she doesn’t know whether she is joking or telling the truth. Ever since Jiang Xin became famous, she has had more disputes. Liu Tao, who has worked with her, once said that Jiang Xin has a very low emotional intelligence, and sometimes she offends people without even realizing it.

In fact, many relatives may have encountered people with poor emotional intelligence. Forget it if they are ordinary strangers. The worst thing is that they are friends with whom they have a good relationship. They are often hurt by them and feel helpless. Vent everywhere.

I have a good friend who is like this. Because I am broad-minded and fat (cry for a while), when a few friends who play well together often make jokes, it is okay. But I have a friend who makes fun of my fatness only when there are many people. One time it went too far. We were chatting about the delicacies of my hometown at the dinner table. I told everyone about a kind of chicken in our hometown that is quite famous. Just when I was talking about being proud, my friend said: Stop talking, look at your big fat chicken, I know that the dish from your hometown tastes good. After saying that, she laughed so humorously that she was so angry that I almost stuffed the chicken drumstick into her mouth to tell her to shut up!

With such a person, if you feel angry, she will innocently say, just a joke, why take it seriously. You really tricked me, and you still blame me for not laughing, right?

What should you do if you meet such a person? Two words: Stay away!

I had just given birth and my figure had not yet recovered and I had gained a lot of weight. Once my aunt insisted on letting me go to her house to chat and play. After I went there, my uncle came over even after I had not stayed for a while. He looked at me and said, "Hey, why are you eating like a pig now?" At that time, I went to my cousin's house. I was so angry that I cried. Then the neighbor at the door went to her house and happened to go in to get something. She asked my aunt Why am I crying? My aunt said it’s okay, she’s just too squeamish. Her uncle said something to her and she cried like this. It’s nothing. From then on, except when I went to her house on the New Year gift-giving day, I almost never stepped foot in her house every year. I knew that she was usually bad, but I didn’t expect that she would be so bad at confusing right and wrong. When it comes to my two aunts, they are as bad as a litter. A few months after my mother left, my father also listened to their instigation every day and was too bad to do anything. At that time, he really wanted to commit suicide. Fortunately, I had many friends who enlightened me, as well as my beloved brothers, sisters, husband and son. They used to Treat me like a poor dog. I can trample on anyone I want and scold anyone I want. Fortunately, I am more ambitious. Now I can earn almost 200,000 yuan a year. I have bought a car and plan to buy a house. Now they don’t dare to Say whatever you want about me, not to mention that I don’t want to talk to them anymore. It’s annoying to see these snobby dogs. The advantage of working in other places is that you don’t have to see these annoying faces. My mother was so good to them when she was alive, but she left. Treating her children like this, no wonder my aunt dreamed that my mother went to find her and treated her badly. She had this dream for several days in a row. If you don't do anything wrong, how can you be afraid? I often dream that my mother is always smiling, including my little dream that my mother is holding her hand and telling us to be good and take care of each other. When we get to her place, my mother is still there. To scare her? I don’t think I owe it to my conscience. When their business failed when I was in junior high school, my mother earned more than two hundred yuan a day. She had to hand over the earned money to my grandma, and secretly gave her fifty yuan. I was afraid. She can't live well. My mother pays the water and electricity bills for her. The two children eat and sleep at my house. Why are they so unscrupulous? They are so wicked. Such people really have their evil deeds punished. Although they are still with me now. They talk, but they still won't forgive me in their hearts. Really, when I was in the most pain, they would do this or that every day. I will never forgive them.

I resigned from my job at the end of August because there was no one to help me take care of my children. When I went to the work unit to go through the formalities, I happened to meet the webmaster. This disgusting old man who was less than 165 years old was famous for his lack of skills. I said : Hello, Director Zhang, he said: Hey, I heard that you married a rich husband and didn’t even go to class? I smiled and said, "Oh, no, no. In fact, you may not know that my family is quite rich. Working for so many years has been just to pass the time and have fun!" He immediately lost his face, turned around and left. There were two colleagues beside him. The atmosphere at that time was quite embarrassing for him! Hahaha! Damn it, I don’t even want to do it anymore because I’m afraid you’re a dick! This bitch deserves to be punished! ! !

Thanks for the invitation! There may be distant seeding experiences, but I don’t remember them because I never keep such things in my mind. This is a very inconspicuous thing in the process of life. You can encounter anything in life. It depends on how you deal with it. Look at the bright side of everything, look at the positive and sunny things, don't look at the gloomy things, and follow the correct path of sunshine. I think only in this way can we make our own life happy.

There was a gathering of colleagues, and someone ordered dog meat hot pot. A male colleague from the south insisted that I try it. I told him that we Manchus don’t eat dog meat. He started to talk nonsense about why you were busy with so many things, what happened to you after eating, etc. I ignored him. Later, he drank too much and started to curse the Manchu people with unpleasant words. I directly slammed the bowl of noodles in front of him in his face.

I want to tell you something that I once encountered. I am a nurse intern in a hospital in my senior year. There are 7 people in our group, from different places. One of the girls and I both have acne. Everyone with acne knows that they don’t like other people’s comments. One day, one of my internship teammates said to the internship teammate who also likes acne, look at the acne on your face. I subconsciously felt that this was not good, so I I said something, but she is also very beautiful even if she has acne. In fact, I really think so in my heart, because this girl actually doesn’t have many acne, but others think she has many acne even if she doesn’t have any. At that time, it was really The random words may have been remembered by the girl. Once, in the same situation, when I was being teased, the girl suddenly said, "Don't talk nonsense. I don't think so." I felt so heartwarming at the time. It turned out that I had been A casual sentence will help yourself in the end, so you still have to be kind when you speak.

At that time, I was already twenty years old. Several old men in the same village saw our three straw huts and said, "It's a good thing, young man, that we have three houses." I replied, "It's okay to stay there." .

After seeing the description of the subject, I feel that the subject is a little aggrieved, a little angry, and a little unwilling. Looking back on my childhood, I have encountered naughty people, and I have been teased from time to time, but it has not been to the extent of being insulted. Is it because I am lucky? I don't think so.

Reminds me of a story: It is said that two young monks were distracted while listening to the scriptures. They watched the wind in the yard swaying the Buddhist flags. One of the monks said: "Look, the wind is moving." The flags also move.” Another monk said, “That’s wrong, the wind moves when the flags move.” Master Huineng responded, “It’s not the wind that moves, nor the flags that move, but the heart.”

There is another story that has the same purpose but a different approach. It was said that Su Dongpo went to chat with Zen Master Foyin. Su Dongpo said to Foyin: "I have been very diligent in studying Buddhism recently. What do you think of my sitting posture now?" Foyin praised: "Like a Buddha." Su Dongpo was very happy to hear this. Foyin then asked: "What do you think of me?" In order to overpower Foyin, Su Dongpo replied: "Like a piece of shit." Foyin also smiled after hearing this. Su Dongpo was very happy after returning and spread the news everywhere that he had defeated the Buddha's seal this time. After Su Xiaomei heard this, she said to her brother: "Brother, please stop spreading it around. In fact, you lost." Su Dongpo didn't understand. Su Xiaomei continued: "Foyin has Buddha in his heart, so he sees everyone as Buddha. You have shit in your heart, so he sees everyone as shit."

The Zen meaning in the two stories is thought-provoking. Aftertaste. In an individual's understanding of life situations, in addition to the objective reality of life itself, one's own inner thoughts and thoughts are the key to the generation of feelings.

Returning to the topic, the process from being joked to being insulted involves changes in an individual’s inner feelings.

I am a relatively rational girl. When I was provoked by naughty boys since childhood, I would just ignore them or laugh them off, not even rolling my eyes. After several attempts, the boys would not get a response and would naturally leave because they were bored. Therefore, I think the escalation of the joke level is related to the attitudes of both parties, just like a high-five with both hands will ring. If the subject encounters a joking insult and the subject does not like it and cannot bear it, unless there is something wrong with the person who made the joke In addition, the subject's own mental state and attitude in responding to jokes may also be one of the reasons.

Back in Time

I was once insulted by a classmate in primary school. We are neighbors on the front and rear streets. When she played games with us, she often thought I was thin and called me: " "Little Douzi", when I was young, I only heard it as a joke.

Later, when we all grew up and went to junior high school, she still called me "Little Douzi", and she got so angry that she replied: "June Fresh", ha, because she is her parents, before they got married. We also learned about the product of pregnancy from our neighbor because she bullied others too much and was angry if she didn't give it back.

She looked down on the "Little Douzi" back then, just because her family was well-off and we were humble. She was good at studying and was the leader of the class. She was awesome. Maybe she would never have dreamed that the people she looked down on were taller than her and would turn over. No wonder she was nowhere to be seen at the class reunion.

It’s not good to go too far in life, to reach a dead end, and to have no way out.

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