How to cultivate children's independence and self-care ability

Now that living conditions are superior, children have unconsciously developed many bad habits. Excessive dependence on parents is the most typical bad habit formed under this condition, and it is also the biggest obstacle for children to stand on their own feet. Children's excessive dependence on their parents must be caused by their parents' "overprotection" and "single-handedness", but children don't realize how harmful dependence will be to their own growth, and they don't understand that the habit of dependence will affect their bright future.

However, parents must be aware of this, otherwise, your "love" for children will become "harm". We can patiently explain the bad consequences of dependence to children, let them realize the harm of dependence, and let them try to be independent and learn to be self-reliant from various practical actions.

Yang, a pupil who made the news list, is a good example for us to learn. He bought a telephone watch with the money he earned from selling popsicles. Isn't that great?

It is understood that Yang sells newspapers at the age of 4, handmade balloons at the age of 5, catwalks at the children's wear conference at the age of 6, hairpins with long grass on his head at the age of 7, and "follow the fashion" at the end of 8, selling safe fruits and fluorescent hair accessories. In short, he is an old hand.

Yang and his mother didn't make detailed statistics on the sales revenue in the past six years, but it was less than 1000 yuan. His mother said, "If it is a public welfare activity, he will donate. If not, he will use it as pocket money to buy some favorite toys and books. Children experience the hardships of making money, so they don't spend money indiscriminately. "

To his mother's delight, these experiences tempered his spirit of self-reliance and cultivated his sense of teamwork and sharing.

Ways to cultivate children's self-reliance and self-improvement

We know that it is every parent's wish to cultivate a self-reliant child, and it is also the most precious gift parents give their children. Children with independent personality have stronger learning ability and stronger tolerance for setbacks. So I sorted out several methods, which I believe will be very helpful for children to stand on their own feet.

1, give children a chance to exercise.

It's all my father's fault to raise or not to teach. We can't keep children for life, but we should teach them skills and techniques so that children can take care of themselves even if we are not around them.

A mother asked her child to wash socks when he was 3 years old, and did not forget to call her when washing clothes. Although the child is only 3 years old, her mother has asked him to do what she can. She never forgot to call him when she had the chance to do so. Even when she went to the supermarket to buy things, she picked some lighter things to carry for her children, especially the things she bought for them.

In daily life, parents should let their children do it themselves. Although they are very young, they can do many things: set dishes and chopsticks, clean tables, help sweep the floor and do other housework.

In the process of children's continuous hands-on learning, they can master more skills, feel the joy of success, and their self-confidence is gradually established. When the joy of success inspires children's growing interest in self-help and exploration, it is the beginning of children's real self-reliance.

2. When encountering difficulties, let children learn to solve them independently.

When children like to try to do something by themselves at first, they may make mistakes in the process because of lack of experience and exercise. But many parents rushed in when they saw their children's problems, told them what to do, and even began to help them. Over time, children will not only be unable to stand on their own feet, but will rely more on their parents.

For example, when some children encounter some difficulties, they like to say, "Mom, please help me ..." Whenever this happens, the loving mother will immediately stand up and say, "It doesn't matter, there is a mother." Once, twice ... Over time, the child gradually formed an inertial thinking: "It doesn't matter whether you do it or not, there is a mother anyway."

Parents should not help their children when they encounter problems. On the contrary, they should encourage children to solve problems with their own brains and hands, so that children can discover their potential and realize their abilities.

Therefore, no matter what children do, parents should let their children do it independently. If it fails, guide the child to think and do it in another way until the child finishes it independently.

3. Let children participate in the decision-making of things.

For some simple things at home, parents can talk to their children more, listen to their suggestions, encourage their children to express their ideas and opinions, and let them learn to participate in decision-making. For example, where are we going to play on weekends? What color is the curtain?

And if you want to sleep in separate rooms, you can take your children to buy what you need, let them choose their favorite beds, and some room decorations, so that they can decorate the room together to look like they like.

Let children participate in simple things, let them learn to think independently, and let them realize their importance at home. While exercising their autonomy, they can also cultivate their sense of responsibility and ownership, thus reducing their dependence.

4. Stimulate children's fighting spirit

After a child finishes something independently, parents should praise the child consciously and purposefully, which can stimulate the child's high fighting spirit and self-esteem, thus generating the confidence that "I can do what others can do, and I will try my best to finish what others can't".

Parents encourage children's fighting spirit, and children will take further actions to help children get rid of the bad habit of dependence psychologically and behaviorally. Slowly, children will also learn to defend their self-esteem and sense of honor with practical actions.

5. Give the child a period of time and let him control it freely.

A clever parent gave his child free time every day when he was very young. Children sometimes play, sometimes read a favorite book, and sometimes draw pictures. Of course, sometimes they are busy and do nothing, but children gradually learn to cherish time and make plans.

A child will certainly encounter many setbacks in the process of growing up, which is a process he must go through. Parents can guide their children to overcome these setbacks and encourage him behind his back, but they can't help him solve all the difficulties. Self-reliance and self-improvement are the necessary conditions and qualities for anyone to become a successful person. You should let your children know that people can only stand on their own feet if they make themselves stronger. Everyone should not only learn to survive, but also learn to stand on their own feet, so as to be invincible.

For family education, parents' educational concept plays a decisive role. Smart parents should learn to be a "ruthless" person, a parent who stresses principles, has a bottom line and knows the limits. They should not indulge their children everywhere. They should set rules, make clear requirements, set an example for children, establish a scientific concept and system of parenting, and educate children with a rational, restrained and scientific attitude. And by leading children to experience real life together, overcome difficulties together, create a beautiful home together, and slowly cultivate children's self-reliance and self-improvement, so that he can learn to solve problems by himself and become a strong man in life.

Therefore, parents must encourage their children to learn to be self-reliant as soon as possible and consciously train them to do their own things. At the same time, it is necessary to cultivate children's self-control ability and learn to exercise restraint. This is the beginning of a child's future success.