Joke Collection Website - Mood Talk - The dialogue between Rolls-Royce owners and beggars is profound!

The dialogue between Rolls-Royce owners and beggars is profound!

A conversation between a Rolls Royce owner and a beggar.

A boss is driving a Rolls-Royce car and stops at the intersection waiting for the traffic lights.

Then a beggar came and knocked on the window glass and said, give me some money! The boss said, I'll give you a cigarette. There are China cigarettes in my car! The beggar said, I don't smoke. Give me some money!

The boss said, then I have the best beer in my car Let me give you a can of beer! The beggar said: I don't drink, please give me some money!

The boss said, do it! I'll take you to the sauna to enjoy the massage service, one-stop service, and I'll pay for all the expenses! The beggar said, I don't go whoring Give me some money!

The boss looked at him helplessly and said, then you get on the bus and I'll take you back to show my wife: how can four good men who don't smoke, drink, gamble or prostitute get mixed up like this?

At this time, the beggar walked away despondently.

Very practical inspirational words:

1, there are only two results for men who don't work hard: endless low-grade cigarettes and endless manual labor; Women who don't work hard only have two results, endless stalls and endless vegetable markets! (learn to struggle)

Don't expect others to give you any financial help. Money is not enough for anyone. /kloc-people with 0/10,000 yuan want to do things with 20,000 yuan, and people with 6,543,800 yuan want to do things with 200,000 yuan. (learn to be self-reliant)

3. It is good and moral for friends to help you; It is understandable that friends don't help you, and you shouldn't suffer. (Learn to understand)

You should know that no one has to help you when you need it, only you, so all you need to do is be independent, strong, happy and happy. After all, only you are closely related to your life and death. (learn to be strong)

5, don't watch the rich make friends with the poor, he has hundreds of millions of wealth and you have nothing to do, don't make yourself a pug. He may have nothing, but he can give you the only steamed bread. (learn to distinguish)

6. Don't alienate friends with rich spirit for the sake of friends with rich economy. Slowly, you will understand that wealthy friends can take you to eat, drink and have fun, and they can also bring you complicated and chaotic secular troubles. A friend with rich spirit may only take you to fields and streams. There is no wine, no food, no champagne, no coffee and no dance floor, but she can run with you and laugh like a fool. (Learn to respect yourself)

7. You can believe that there really is a beautiful and faithful love in the world. Don't expect such a romantic thing to happen to you It only belongs to Cowherd and Weaver Girl, Liang Shanbo and Zhu Yingtai, and Romeo and Juliet abroad. Because none of them will live long. We will live for a long time. (learn to cherish)

No matter what you get married for, as long as you have children, you must love this family. No matter how humble and cold it is, you have an obligation to keep it warm, because you are your parents! (learn to bear)

9. Our youth is fleeting, and wrinkles climb up the corner of our eyes. We can't stop the years from destroying our faces, but we can let our hearts sharpen slowly in the years, like sand in a clam shell, and slowly smooth them out. When we are pale and faltering, we can also make the luster of pearls dim in the last trip, can't we? (learn to grow)

Every sentence is reasonable and incisive.

1, don't be persistent, life has many disappointments, the world won't cater to you, and the earth won't turn around for you, so don't be persistent in owning, even if we are just passers-by in the world of mortals, what can death take away when life comes naked? (learn to let go)

2. Don't alienate friends who are rich in money. Slowly, you will understand that wealthy friends can take you to eat, drink and have fun, and they can also bring you complicated and chaotic secular troubles. A friend with rich spirit may only take you to fields and streams, without wine and food, champagne, coffee and dance floor, but she can run with you and laugh like a fool. (Learn to respect yourself)

3, don't watch the rich make friends with the poor, he has hundreds of millions of wealth and it has nothing to do with you, don't make yourself a pug. He may have nothing, but he can give you the only steamed bread. (learn to distinguish)

4. A boss drives a Mercedes-Benz car and stops at the intersection to wait for the traffic lights. Then a beggar came and knocked on the window glass and said, give me some money! The boss said, I'll give you a cigarette. There are China cigarettes in my car! The beggar said, I don't smoke. Give me some money! The boss said, then I have the best beer in my car Let me give you a can of beer! The beggar said: I don't drink, please give me some money! The big boss said, let's do it! I'll take you to the mahjong room, and you help me play cards. You win, I lose! The beggar said, I can't gamble. Give me some money! The boss said, do it! I'll take you to the sauna to enjoy the massage service, one-stop service, and I'll pay for all the expenses! The beggar said, I don't go whoring Give me some money! The boss looked at him helplessly and said, then you get on the bus and I'll take you back to show my wife: how can four good men who don't smoke, drink, gamble or prostitute get mixed up like this? At this time, the beggar walked away despondently.

You can believe that there really is a beautiful and faithful love in the world. Don't expect such a romantic thing to happen to you It only belongs to Cowherd and Weaver Girl, Liang Shanbo and Zhu Yingtai, and Romeo and Juliet abroad. Because none of them will live long. We will live for a long time. (learn to cherish)

No matter what you get married for, as long as you have children, you must love this family. No matter how humble and cold it is, you have an obligation to keep it warm, because you are your parents! (learn to bear)

7. Know that no one has to help you when you need it, only yourself, so all you need to do is be independent, strong, happy and happy. After all, only you are closely related to your life and death. (learn to be strong)

8. Don't expect others to give you any financial help. Money is not enough for anyone. /kloc-people with 0/10,000 yuan want to do things with 20,000 yuan, and people with 6,543,800 yuan want to do things with 200,000 yuan. (learn to be self-reliant)

9. Men who don't work hard only have two results, low-grade cigarettes that can't be smoked and manual labor that can't be done; Women who don't work hard only have two results, endless stalls and endless vegetable markets! (learn to struggle)

10, it is good and moral for friends to help you; It is understandable that friends don't help you, and you shouldn't suffer. (Learn to understand)

1 1, our youth disappeared in the blink of an eye, and wrinkles climbed up the corner of our eyes. We can't stop the years from destroying our faces, but we can let our hearts hone slowly in the years, just like the sand in a clam shell, and slowly smooth it out. When we are pale and faltering, we can also make the luster of pearls pale in the final journey, can't we? (learn to grow)

Talk about phrases in depth.

1. If you decide to give up, please give up cleanly. Those who decided never to meet again really didn't. Please don't make me betray myself again. If you want to love others, please love yourself first.

We have learned a lot of unnecessary things. It turns out that our world is not so happy, but the pain has become forever. Those beautiful pictures, like a ray of fireworks in the vast night sky, are fleeting.

There are too many forks in the journey of life, and turning around may be a lifetime. Miss the scenery along the way, miss the snow season at this time, miss the flower season at that time.

The greatest happiness in life is to meet a fairy-tale fate. In this world, whenever and wherever, there are always two people waiting for each other.

The end of the world is too far, life is too long, and tea can't resist time. Memory changes, who is pale and who waits, who regrets and who is persistent.

6. We are used to sacrificing the present for waiting for the unknown, but we often forget that we have enough ability to treat ourselves well. Life does not sell return tickets, and what is lost will never be obtained. Whenever you hesitate, please ask yourself.

7. How many people use "this is the last time" to convince themselves, but still do the same thing. How many people encourage themselves with "it won't happen again", but they still make the same mistake.

8. I can afford what I like and go where I want to go. I won't lose the quality of life because of the people around me, but I will be more confident because I spend my own money. That's why I should work harder.

9. If you owe someone, others will want it back. Others owe you, others will pay you back. What you do to one person, whether it's hurting or paying, will always be repaid or retaliated by another person. Nodes at different times. Generally speaking, the ruthlessness and promiscuity in life are conservative.

10. "Insecurity is the most common gynecological disease in the world."

1 1. Money can't support you for a lifetime. Handsome, you can't show off all your life. People live by it, not by comparison. It's really good to live a good life. So don't look for handsome or rich people, find someone who can tolerate you. If he can't tolerate your emotions and shortcomings, what's the use of good conditions? In fact, the best day is nothing more than you are making trouble, he is laughing, and it is a warm life.

12. If you have no skills, don't be too angry, or you will be in trouble. If you don't have too many abilities, don't have too many desires, otherwise it will be very painful.

13. Nothing is better than doing three things well: first, knowing how to choose; The second is to understand how to persist; The third is to know how to cherish.

14. Almost all losses begin with fear of loss. Almost all gains begin with loss.

15. Lucky people will know that luck is not wealth and success, nor happiness without pain, but being loved regardless of emotions.

16. The proper place in life is not near money or power, but near the soul.

17. What does the world have to do with me? I just want to keep my day, drinking tea, reading, listening to music, walking, staring blankly and making soup.

18. No one likes loneliness, but loneliness makes people feel practical compared with cold and hot.

19. Some precious fragments in life actually come from some trivial things.

20. Smile is the fermentation of happiness after I see you.

2 1. If someone hurts you, don't thank the person who hurt you. They didn't do anything to make you grow up. What makes you grow is your reflection and strength. So thank yourself and thank the people you are with.

22. Elegance is a very difficult thing. It's harder than being reserved. It's harder than hooligans. Be reserved and pretend. Rogues are easier. But elegance won't do. Elegance needs temperament. Need qualifications. It takes years of precipitation. Want that peace and light.

23. What others say and do can never determine what kind of person you are; What you say and do to others can determine what kind of person you are.

24. Do something you don't want to do every day. This is the most precious rule, which can make you develop the habit of being conscientious and not complaining.

25. I have gradually developed the habit of not explaining. Many emotions can't be shared, so I simply digest them myself. What you know will naturally be understood, and what you don't understand will sometimes be explained. Some stories can only be told to people who understand.

26. Many people are sad just to show their sadness. In fact, no one in this world can understand another person's sadness.

27. There is no secret to growing old together. Only when you are in love can you save some feelings and know some gratitude during the cold war.

28. I wish I were a tree, quiet, facing the light, safe and sensitive nerve endings, touching flowing clouds and breeze, and whispering joy. Stepping on the meanest mud under your feet is very practical. Also, I grow up secretly every day.

29. Even though I am very young, I still have my life. Even if I am very young, I still have my family; Even though I am very young, I still use my freedom. I have enough; Satisfied, I am no longer small.

30. What you are looking for is often not found. Everything in the world comes and goes in his time.

3 1. Sometimes people are like this. When something big happens, they will endure, and they will endure. When they hear a word of comfort from people around them, they will be defeated in an instant. Later, I learned that what I was afraid of was not indifference, but sudden tenderness, not suffering alone, but that people around me felt sorry for you, not loneliness, but disappointment.

32. People you love are often too impulsive and love to call names and swear. But in fact, after these actions, only I know how uncomfortable and painful I am. Facts have proved that such a vicious and soft-hearted person is really not dominant, wronged himself and disgusted others.

33. I like people who treat me well when I am fat, and I will definitely repay you if I lose weight.

We understand the truth one by one, but some unreasonable little emotions determine most of our emotions.

35. I am a slow person. I didn't know ignorance at the age of ten, innocence at the age of thirty, recklessness at the age of thirty and confusion at the age of forty until I was fifty. But all this is a necessary process for me to learn in my life. I don't regret, I don't blame others, and I don't blame myself. I just wish I had the courage to look back at myself ten years later.

36. To love someone is to wait until he comes back no matter how late it is. To love someone is to reach out and touch his forehead when he is coughing. To love someone is to cook his favorite dishes every day. If you love someone, you want to be more beautiful, you want to be noticed by everyone, but you can only be owned by him.

37. Sometimes loneliness is a good thing. A person can see the world more, walk more, spend time on business and become the kind of person he really likes.

38. The less you study, the less satisfied you are with the environment; The more you read, the less satisfied you are with yourself. People who read less, the more subjective and simple they are, the easier they are to complain about everything. Read more books, broaden your horizons, improve your analytical thinking ability, especially from the experience and analysis of your predecessors, and increase your ability to judge complex problems, know how to look at problems, and know where your shortcomings are. You know how many books you read when you complained.

39. I am most afraid that you will be mediocre all your life, but also comfort yourself that you are ordinary and valuable.

40. More than half of people's core competitiveness comes from non-urgent things: reading, exercising, making friends with wise people and hobbies.

Funny dialogue between teachers and students

1, the teacher explained the meaning of milk in class, saying: milk means small, such as suckling pig, squab, birth name and so on! Xiao Ming is asked to make sentences with the word milk. Xiaoming: Because the house price is too high now, our family can only buy 50 square meters of breasts!

Teacher Khan said: build another one.

Xiaoming: I'm too young to jump over a cleavage one meter wide!

Teacher Khan: No, create another one!

Xiao Ming: Teacher, I really can't think of it. My nipples are going to burst!

2. A four-year-old boy kissed a three-year-old girl, and the girl told the boy that if you kissed me, you would be responsible for me. The boy patted the girl on the shoulder maturely and said with a smile: Don't worry, we are not children of one or two years old.

The teacher asked the students to make sentences with wrinkles.

A student wrote: My father's eggs have many wrinkles. The teacher criticized the parents for not showing their children around.

Parents explained that the child was careless since childhood and didn't write a word on his face.

One day, my son came home and said to his mother, I saw an old man shouting. Really pitiful! My son is really sensible. He had 10 quick money when he came. Give it to him.

After a while, my son came back with an ice cream in his hand. My mother felt very strange and asked, where did you get the ice cream?

Buy it!

Where did the money come from?

You gave it to me!

Didn't you go to donate money?

Who said that? The old man ordered an ice cream!

A national leader and his prime minister flew together. Suddenly, the plane broke down and was about to crash. At this time, in addition to the two of them, there was a pilot and a little girl on board, but the plane was only equipped with three parachute bags. Seeing this, the pilot immediately jumped down with an umbrella bag on his back. The leader jumped down with his bag, willy-nilly. When the Prime Minister was about to jump, he found the little girl behind him. At this time, a touching scene happened on the plane. ......

Premier: Little sister, I have a parachute bag here. Here you are.

Little girl: No ..... no need.

Premier Wen: You are still young and have a bright future. Take it.

Little girl: But I already have it!

Premier Wen: Where did your umbrella bag come from?

Little girl: That uncle jumped with my schoolbag just now.

6. A female math teacher in a primary school asked a simple math question: There are five birds in the tree. The hunter killed one with a gun. How much is left?

A clever little boy replied, there are no birds in the tree. The hunter shot down one and scared the others away.

The young female teacher looked at the little boy with disdain and commented: In fact, my answer is very simple. Five minus one equals four. The implication is that there is no need to be smart and think too much.

At this moment, the little boy asked the teacher, Can I test you a question?

Of course, take any exam. The teacher answered confidently.

The boy began his question: there are three ladies in an ice cream shop, and they are all holding a cone-shaped ice cream: one is biting; One is licking; One is sucking. Ask the teacher to answer, which of them is married?

Hearing this, the female teacher blushed at first and replied, I don't know. All three of them may be married.

The little boy replied: actually, teacher, my answer is very simple. Whoever wears a wedding ring will get married.

7. I went to the electronic goods market yesterday and saw a child lying in the booth studying hard. I am very touched. When I took a closer look, I was disappointed. The child is copying other people's homework. I warned him: primary school students, don't always copy other people's homework, which is dishonest and affects their academic performance.

The child curled his mouth: What am I? You didn't read it. My father sells pirated copies here! It sells like hot cakes!

8. I went to school in the morning, but went home several times. The reason is.

Mom, my watch.

Mom, my wallet.

Mom, my mobile phone

mother

What did you leave behind ~ ~ ~

Mom, today is Saturday, isn't it?

be

Then I don't have to go to school today.

collide

9. What about Xiaoming? He will have an exam tomorrow, but he is watching TV in the evening.

Xiao Ming's mother asked anxiously: Have you finished all the books? There will be an exam tomorrow.

Xiao Ming replied brightly: Mom, I finished reading it.

Xiao Ming's mother praised Xiao Ming happily: Good boy, then you must do well in the exam tomorrow.

Xiao Ming cried and said, mom, I mean, mom, I think it's over.

10, the child asked his mother: how to make sentences with ABCDEFG?

Mom: a! Is this child B from the C family? Standing barefoot on D, ef is not wearing, and there is a little GG.