Suitable for posting funny sentences about marriage in qq space.

Funny sentence 1. I lined up to buy breakfast. Someone slapped me from behind. I look back. It's two girls. One of them smiled shyly and said, I'm sorry, I mistook you for someone else. Then I turned around and vaguely heard one of the girls say, handsome fart.

I went to eat hot pot with my girlfriend. I pointed to the Yuanyang pot and said, look, this hot pot is just like the two of us. She said: You mean I'm as hot as a spicy pot and you're as cold as a clear soup pot? I said, no, I mean I'm hot here, and you're hot next door!

3.a: How important is a person's appearance? B: The college entrance examination is the last competition in your life that doesn't depend on looks.

4. W: What do you men think when your girlfriend has her period? M: Before marriage, my girlfriend's holiday is like school, and after marriage, my wife's holiday is like a holiday.

I went back to the familiar classroom, stroking the old desk, seeing the familiar teacher and doing the familiar paper, and I knew I failed again.

6. The teacher looked at us on the platform and sighed heavily and said, I gave up smoking for you! Because I'm afraid I'll set you all on fire if I'm not careful!

7. Why do they get together by giving them ointment, drinking milk tea, eating KFC and giving them chewing gum in the advertisement ... Why?

8. A monthly exam, test paper title: write a famous book and famous sentences inside. A classmate thought hard for a long time before he thought of the following answer: Journey to the West and the famous saying: Monster! Eat my old grandson!

9. Preserved eggs and salted eggs take salted eggs to the hospital. The doctor looked at them and asked the salted egg directly: What's the situation? Salted egg surprised: how do you know I'm not feeling well? Because salted eggs hurt.

10. I really hope that one day when I was walking on the road, I met a real estate developer and fell down, and then I helped him up. He smiled and gave me a real estate license and left. I shouted, boss, your room book! Then the boss turned his head and smiled and said to me, no, it's your room book.

1 1. Mr. gongsun, our government found that it is sometimes quite fun to name a person by combining the last word of his name with his residence. Bao Zheng is in high spirits. For example, my name is Bao Zheng, my residence is a shelter, and Zhan Zhao's residence is a guest house ... So what? Gongsun Ce said angrily, what are you trying to say?

12. I went to the teacher's office to answer questions. Seeing the teacher marking papers while listening to Buddhist music, I asked why, and answered: it is easier to read papers when listening to Buddhist music, otherwise these rabbits will fail!

13. According to legend, Tencent's first job: uninstall your 360. Qihoo's first job: forget your QQ number and throw away your millet. The first thing for Baidu to join the company: register a Baidu hi. The first thing for Shanda to join the company is to play for an hour. The first thing Xiaomi did when he joined the job: he was taken to a room, bowed down to Jobs' portrait, and spat three times at Zhou's portrait.

14. Nezha's father was furious on the wine table and said: If I had known that my third son was so troublesome, I would have hit him on the wall! The Monkey King's father took a deep breath of his cigarette: It's no use.

15. Many beautiful girls told me that no one chased them and no one hurt them. At first, I thought that only boys I like would not chase and care. Later, I found such a problem, that is, they kept saying that no one chased them and no one cared about them, but they didn't treat some male diaosi who chased them and cared about them as people at all.

16.a said: I was wrong about my wife. B said: Why? The other day, I found a diary written by my wife about having an affair with her neighbor. I gave her a meal without saying anything. Finally, I found that the diary was from last year. B said: That's right. A: I was her neighbor at that time.

17. That man is chatting up beautiful women in the bar. The man asked: I wonder what kind of man a beautiful woman is interested in? The beauty was silent for a while and whispered: big money, coarse equipment.

What is suitable for sending in qq dynamics?

First, maybe he heard your voice and even felt that he was suffering. Why do you have to chase him at the top of your lungs?

Second, don't rely on someone easily, it will become your habit. When parting comes, what you lose is not someone, but your spiritual pillar. No matter when and where, learning to walk independently will make you walk more calmly.

Third, reconciliation is easy, but it is too difficult at first. It is better to go our separate ways than to be suspicious of each other. I will laugh generously and walk generously.

Fourth, I have been trying to adapt to the cold of this world, whether it is temperature or human heart.

Fifth, I thought it would be good to be apart, but I was torn by loneliness and hurt despair.

No one can eliminate your pain, so don't let others take away your happiness.

Seven, in fact, people are very cheap, there are not a few people who love you and spoil you, and people who are as cold as ice are chasing you. Finally, I was black and blue.

I like to bite off the dead skin on my lips. If I don't bite it off, I will feel uncomfortable. I like to pick up the scab on the wound. Even if it hurts, I can't control it. I like squeezing acne. I knew I would leave a scar, and I couldn't help squeezing it out. I don't always pack. I occasionally bite a straw on a whim. I occasionally laugh mercilessly. I sometimes sit quietly alone. Sometimes I feel inexplicably nostalgic.

Nine, never retreat, retreat to the end is no way back.

Ten, a person is born and dies, but as long as you are alive, you must live in the best way. You can live without love and famous brands, but you can't live without happiness.

Boys who are equally good to all girls are the most terrible.

Twelve, knowledge is a kind of happiness, curiosity, the bud of knowledge.

Thirteen, the TV is: give you 10 thousand, keep my daughter. The reality is: give us 10 thousand, or leave my daughter.

Fourteen, the fire of victory needs you to ignite, grasp the present and ignite the fire of victory.

If you want to be a fish, you won't get dirty if you don't take a bath. Every seven seconds, a new world will appear. It will be cute to be fat and stand out from the crowd, and it will not be sad to be lazy.

At the age of sixteen, I felt that my mother was the best person since I was a child. She was not afraid of the dark, knew everything, cooked good dishes, kept my life in order, and went to see her when I was crying and didn't know what to do. But I seem to forget that the person I rely on used to be a little girl. She was afraid of the dark and would shed tears, and her clumsy hand would be pricked by a needle. The most beautiful girl, what makes you so powerful? Is it time or love?

Seventeen, some people are gone once they miss it.

18. I thought you were the enemy of the whole universe, but it happened that the stars were you and the dust was you.

Please cherish those who respond to what you have done.

Twenty, holding the child's hand, you will know that the child is ugly and his face is full of tears.

However, when we decide to go alone, all the curses and betrayals are left behind. We can smile stubbornly and cry sadly, but we still move on.

Twenty-two, don't do it because of good and small, and don't do it because of evil.

Twenty-three, the so-called maturity, is accustomed to anyone's hot and cold, but also can look down on anyone's drift away.

24. Let me introduce myself again. I have a bad temper, a bad attitude, no sympathy, no reason and no kindness. I will repay you.

Twenty-five, some people believe the lies of Valentine's Day, but no one believes the truth of April Fool's Day.

Twenty-six, some memories are unremarkable, but they are worth a thousand words.

I laugh in the sun during the day and cry under the covers at night.

Twenty-eight, the initial departure from the truth, in the end will be a thousand miles away.

Twenty-nine, many things are beyond your control. Even if you are lonely again, you still have to go on, you can't stop and you can't look back.

Of all the farewells, I like to see you tomorrow best.

3 1. growth is a process of gradually lowering expectations.

No one is always pure to the end, but please don't forget your original self.

Thirty-three, no longer enthusiastic, began to be lazy and humorous.

There are too many stories with no endings, so you should get used to seeing each other late.

It's thirty-five, throwing away so many things, leaving so many people, people coming and going around, forgetting so many familiar faces, surviving countless late nights and dawns, and bumping into so many south walls without hesitation. It's all an illusory dream, but in the end I forgot that I am a very nostalgic person.

Do you like April? April is the best month I can think of for you. Spring has just recovered, and the sunshine is still warm, with the fragrance of breeze and flowers, just like your feeling, light and gentle, but extraordinarily bright.

Thirty-seven, forget a person, not to stop thinking; But when I think about it occasionally, there is no wave in my heart.

Thirty-eight, since love, why not say it? Some things have been lost, and now they can never come back!

I think it is meaningless to live, but if I live, I may find some interesting things, such as looking at flowers and seeing you.

Forty, only when you are strong will you not be trampled on.

Forty-one, don't mistreat every enthusiasm, and don't please any indifference.

42. Don't ask, don't ask, I'm all about my mood.

Qq funny marriage personalized signature

1, I belong to sunshine girl: black as charcoal.

2. I am very strong, and the more frustrated I am, the braver I am: I was dumped 28 times and I am still alive.

I like watching movies with life ethics: all kinds of pirated pornography.

M: I am a mature man, but I am very young: 87 years old, with acne all over my face.

5. My figure is very big, giving people the feeling of big brother: Wu Dalang, Song Wu's big brother.

6. others praise cooking: because I don't want to try every dish several times.

7. I am very enthusiastic and often care about the lives of ordinary people: see who forgot to close the window when going out.

8. I often deal with upper-class people: I have repeatedly warned against setting up stalls at the school gate.

9. I hope you can tell me what you see and hear every day: monitor your trip every day.

10, people at my level are very reluctant to go by train: they often ride three rounds to sell Tianjin big twist everywhere.

1 1. I like to study history in my spare time, especially the Qing history, and I am a loyal fan of concubines in the palace.

12, female: The ancients said that women without talent are virtuous, which is very consistent with me: I dropped out of primary school until the third grade.

13, I love my parents very much, and I hope you can fully support me: I regard money as my parents, and I hope you can satisfy me.

14, I am very savvy. My ex-girlfriend put the flowers I gave her on a piece of wild manure, and I understood at once.

15, I heard that someone asked me for vegetable rice. I want to be quiet outside: the police are coming to arrest me, and I have to hide for a while.

16, my appearance meets the standard of being a wife: a beautiful woman makes people worry, and my wife looks pleasing to the eye.

17, my years of edification in Tsinghua have shaped my cultural taste today: setting up a stall at the school gate in Tsinghua.

18, I have an indomitable will: I ate and chatted with my friends for five hours, and my friends finally checked out.

19, I don't mind your busy work for ten days and a half, so that I can play as I like and go out occasionally at night.

20. I hope you like food as much as I do, and like to show off in the kitchen: I like food but I can't cook, so you'd better cook.

Talk about what is suitable for off-year

1, in my early years, I smiled happily at you and forgot my troubles; Happiness "nods" to you, and there is less melancholy; Happiness beckons to you and bad luck runs away. Good luck is around every day, and life is sweeter than honey. I wish you good luck and happiness in the new year.

2. Except for the one-year-old firecrackers, bring your wife into the Jianghu with a big bag on her shoulder, only allowed to go in and out. If you ask what the family robbed, red envelopes and blessings!

3. Make sugar water with deep happiness, fill in the sincerely made stove candy, sing along with the New Year, and come to your side quietly. If you must try it, stick it on your body for good luck, and don't forget to touch some blessing jam! Dear, Happy New Year!

4. On New Year's Eve, serve a table of dishes. Braised fish wish you more than a year. Cloud cake wishes you a promotion step by step. Sweet-scented osmanthus lotus root is willing to help you. Spicy tofu wish you good luck all the way. Sugar dumplings wish you a sweet and complete life! Happy new year!

I just want to be happy, and I don't envy immortals. Peace is my wish. The most important thing is to be healthy and earn more money. I just want to be happy and not expensive. I miss you. I wish you a wonderful life and a happy new year. Don't get drunk!

6. Welcome the new year happily, and the next year is coming. Happy Chinese New Year, sweet melon. Sacrifice the stove to make noodle soup, and send good luck safely. Clean the New Year, clean the courtyard. I wish you happiness and well-being in advance in the New Year!

7, eat root sugar officer, happiness is sticky and happy, sweet and sweet; Sweep away the dust, worry wraps sadness, and all are cleared out; Bye-bye to the kitchen god, good luck is accompanied by wishful thinking, followed closely for a whole year; Steamed rice cakes are auspicious and rich, getting higher every year; I wish you a happy new year and a happy family!

8. On the occasion of bidding farewell to the old and welcoming the new, please allow me to paint a picture of the Year of the Monkey with Millennium Pine as the pen, Wan Li mountains and rivers as the ink, blue sky as the announcement, elegant plum blossoms, enchanting peony and fresh daisies. Celebrate a happy new year.

9. come to the Chinese new year to worship the stove. Sacrifice to the branches of magpies, to the god of wealth, to a higher cause, to love and sunshine, and to a smooth and happy life. I wish you a happy new year.

10, it's New Year's Eve, and it's closer. The tiger's tail is rich, the rabbit is the first gospel, the warm wind is coming in spring, the snowflakes are flying all over the sky, the lights are bright and the whip is full of blessings. Whether you are far or near, my blessing has set sail; Happy New Year!

1 1, pay New Year greetings to Teacher Yang in advance. How many greetings have been hidden in the years, your hand is your luck. Good luck. I wish you a happy new year in advance, and your heart beats. First of all, I wish you a smile. Success and happiness are the most important things. Happy New Year!

12, off-year came to Xileyang, firecrackers sounded, laughing. Beautiful clothing exhibition style; Hold one's head high Mobile phone information keeps flowing, and warm words are deeply touched. I wish you abundant financial resources, prosperous business and abundant financial resources. I wish you good luck and good health every year.

13. In the off-year, I fled the troubled harbor with forgetfulness, drove away the frustrated ship with cannons, remotely controlled the "life train" with luck, and rewarded the "happy tribe" with kitchen candy. In this small year, all the good things are around you, the sad breath is far away from you, and a full life surrounds you!

14, the new year is coming, and everyone is busy celebrating the holidays. Clean the doors and windows, whitewash the walls, and make your mind bright. The king of the people welcomes happiness and auspiciousness with sticks and window grilles. I wish you a happy new year, health and longevity!

15, some things will not fade with the passage of time, and some people will not forget because they don't meet often. In my memory, you are my forever friend. On the occasion of the Spring Festival, I wish you a prosperous career!

16, Xiao Nian Xiao dimple, happiness represents me, I wish you a smile forever, Xiao Nian Xiao Qing, happiness becomes a bunker, protecting your health and beauty, Xiao Nian is nothing, I wish you a fortune.

17, off-year is already very much like Chinese New Year, and every household writes Spring Festival couplets. Every corner is clean and refreshing. Buy new year's goods early, eat, drink and enjoy leisure. The four seasons rush about today's reunion, and the family happiness is really happy. Wish: Happy New Year!

18, give you three Jin of rice cakes on New Year's Eve. Stir-fry one, the more you stir-fry, the more prosperous your career will be; Steaming with steam, life is thriving; Fire one, and all the troubles are blown away; Don't hug, you can take it away if you can't finish eating. Wish you more than one year!

19, I bought new year's goods in the next year, and I added piles of food and drink. A rich tree was added to the ground, and a lot of money was stolen; Add a box of peaches to the table, and life will be sweet because of pleasure; Pour Wuliangye into the cup, and the flower of smile will not fade. I wish you endless new year's goods and good luck in the Year of the Monkey!

20, off-year, stick grilles. The boy has been holding a fish for more than a year, and the two dragons play with pearls to send good luck, the three Yang open a happy event in Thailand, the four seasons are blessed with peace, the grain harvest is good news, and the spring scenery in Liuhe is gratifying. There are so many kinds that you can't tell. Happy new year! Happy New Year!

extreme

1, the snowflake has been in blowing in the wind, but my blessing has been in blowing in the wind. The ice melted, and so did my mind. Plum blossoms bloom, and so does my heart. Did you miss me? I miss you. Here, I wish you a happy new year and full of happiness.

2, 23, after the coming year, eat sugar officials, worship the kitchen god, and pray for good luck in the coming year; Sweep the house, clean the windows, set off firecrackers, steam rice cakes, and be busy with the New Year; It's the New Year, so take time to send blessings. I wish you a happy family and all the best!

3. When the New Year comes, blessings come, happiness surrounds, happiness shines, luck comes, luck invites, blessings come, peace hugs, and good luck accompanies; All good things, good things fly to you, just to say: happy off-year.

There are many interesting things in the off-year, and my hometown is the most concerned. There are many sayings about agricultural customs and habits, and there are also many people cleaning up. Bought many New Year pictures and slaughtered many chickens and sheep. Three rounds of pulling goods to climb the mountain, picking up and buying new year's goods. There are many invitations from relatives and friends. I wish you a happy New Year.

It's the 23rd day of the twelfth lunar month, and auspicious signs are flying all over the sky. Clean Everyone laughs except for the Chinese New Year. Miss and let go of the long line, accompanied by family. Take stock of happiness and good luck, you are perfect. I wish you a happy family when you are young!

6, smooth sailing, good luck, everything goes well. The seasons are always peaceful and spring, and the financial resources have been rolling in recent years. The golden bull whipped the old year, and the five tigers roared to welcome the spring. Go up a flight of stairs and add some happy New Year greetings to yourself. I wish you all the best in the new year!

7. Off-year: Give you a "happy" fire, light a "happy" gun, give you a "happy" dress, give you a "happy" meal, welcome a "prosperous" year, give you "ten" money, light up the "youth" step and live a happy off-year

8. Open the window and "hug" the happy sunshine in the coming year; Open the door and "grasp" the fresh air flow in the next year; Wave a broom to "drive away" all the bad luck of off-year; Turn on your mobile phone and accept my blessing message. I wish you a happy new year and a happy life!

9, snowflakes floating, chilly, and the end of the year is approaching; People are laughing, happy and noisy, and the new year is coming; Buy new year's goods, have a successful career and step by step; Welcome to the kitchen god, at home, happy; Set off firecrackers, enter *, and the god of wealth laughs; I wish you happiness and freedom when the new year comes!

10, I am a little happy during the Spring Festival, and it is before the Spring Festival; Luck is kneaded into noodles, and luck is kneaded into balls; Remember to put up couplets and be busy putting small whips; Say good luck and come early to pay New Year greetings: I wish you good luck and happiness in the Year of the Monkey!

1 1. In the next year, I will make you a box of "good luck oven candy" with "thick good luck syrup" and eat it in my mouth with "blessing jam" to ensure that sweet happiness sticks to you and you can't shake it off. Happy next year!

12, the new year opens new hopes, and the new blank carries new dreams. Sweep away the dust of the years, and let laughter and tears, love and sadness condense into heavy crystal amber in my heart. Happy New Year!

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14, twist a happiness, twist a happiness, twist a sweetness, twist a warmth, twist a beauty, twist a wishful, twist a smoothness, twist a wish; Make a bottle of reunion wine and send it to you next year. I wish you a warm reunion, happiness, sweetness and success!

15, the laughter of the past is hidden in the bottom of my heart, and thousands of thoughts accumulate in the small year. I hope from the heart. Happiness is not just a moment, it will accompany you all your life. I wish you a happy and auspicious New Year.