Joke Collection Website - Mood Talk - How to reply if you are unconscious?

How to reply if you are unconscious?

Question 1: I'm out of my mind. How can we get it out? My god replies to comment jokes 1. I went to save money at noon. When I was waiting in line, a beautiful woman asked me, "Do you save money?" "Yes!" "I just want to withdraw money. Anyway, if you want to save it, you might as well give it to me without waiting in line. " I thought it made sense, so I gave her the money. 2. Get on the bus in the afternoon, take out the bus card and bump into the slot. I found it missing one day. I searched my bag and every corner of my house, but I couldn't find it. I sat on the ground in frustration, took it out of my pocket and sent it to everyone: I lost it. My neighbor forgot his key, turned it over from my balcony, found it in the house, turned it back, and then opened his door. What's even more amazing is that I met on the balcony from beginning to end and didn't feel anything wrong. Well, our heads must have passed through the same door. 5. I remember the first time I confessed to a girl, I was so nervous that I said, "Well, that, XX, I'll be your girlfriend." 6. A young colleague asked for a bottle of Sprite at work the other day and poured it for everyone. When it was his turn, the bottle was empty. So my colleague shook the Sprite bottle and said to the waiter, "Is this still available?" The waiter ran over, took the bottle and examined it carefully. He said sincerely, "It's gone." 7. Having dinner with two enthusiastic female colleagues (plump type), they set about introducing someone to me. I want to say: you two matchmakers are really enthusiastic. As a result, you two fat women ... 8. You play Warcraft. The inspector was furious, grabbed the mouse, dragged the shortcut of Warcraft on the desktop into the recycle bin, emptied it, and said, let you play again! 9. Today, my father called my mother. My mother was busy then, so I answered the phone. Me: Hello Dad: Hello, where's your dad? Me: Huh? Dad: What is your father doing? Me: Hmm. . . Dad: Oh, tell him to call me back when he's finished. 10. Once everyone was playing mahjong, and the power went out, so they lit candles and continued to play. Later, someone was too hot and shouted "Hey ~ turn on the electric fan". Everyone quickly advised, "No, no, the candle will be blown out. 1 1. I like this pair of gloves. The boss wanted 35 yuan, and I said I'd take 30 yuan. The boss insisted on 35 yuan and refused to give in after several rounds of talks. I thought about it and gave one to 50 yuan. He quickly gave me 35 yuan. . . . 12. A topic requires the following four sentences to be connected with related words: 1, Zhang Haidi's sister is paralyzed; 2. Sister Zhang Haidi studied tenaciously; 3. Sister Zhang Haidi learned a lot of foreign languages; 4. Sister Zhang Haidi studied acupuncture. The correct answer should be: Sister Zhang Haidi is paralyzed, but she studies doggedly, not only learning many foreign languages, but also learning acupuncture. As a result, one child wrote: Sister Zhang Haidi was paralyzed despite her tenacious study of acupuncture and many foreign languages. I found a more fierce child writing: Sister Zhang Haidi not only learned a foreign language, but also learned acupuncture. She studied so doggedly that she was finally paralyzed! 13. When cooking at noon, my mother made me a pot of carrots: "Go, cut the carrots into diced meat! ""14. My name is Zhu, and I am the manager of this company. Someone once hit me: "Sir Chicken, are you a pig?" He gave that guy a scolding 15. A leader led everyone to drink, raised his glass and shouted: Let's die together! Everyone (...) 16. I remember once going to a fruit restaurant called Elizabeth, and I opened my mouth and said, boss, how much is Shakespeare? The boss stayed at 17 on the spot. A rice noodle shop: Boss, two onions instead of rice noodles. Boss (tears streaming down her face): Do you want rice noodles or onions? 18. Once I went to the vegetable market to prepare a dinner party, a Korean friend bought lettuce and asked for 2.4 yuan. He gave all the change to the peddler, and there was still a dime missing, so he said to the peddler, "I gave you all my hair, so I have no hair." The peddler was speechless for a long time and replied-"I don't want your hair." 19. I once chatted while eating in the canteen, and suddenly found myself dropping a grain of rice outside, secretly feeling sorry for the farmer's uncle's waste of food, so I picked it up and ate it. But then I found out that this meal didn't seem to be mine ... 20. Xiao Qiang gave a speech at home, and the people below were all ears! Xiao Qiang said: I hate two kinds of people the most! One is racist, one is black and the third is illiterate! The people below were sweating like a pig. . . 2 1. After swimming yesterday, open the trunk directly, throw the key in, and then close the trunk ... 22. Go to a good friend's house and chat. When her father comes back, open his mouth and call her aunt. Embarrassed, her mother appeared again and opened her mouth to call her uncle ... >>

Question 2: People say you are out of your mind. How should you answer her humorously? Ha ha. You are very humorous. First, if you are out of your mind, it is 250, which is very simple. Second, why do you say that? Medically speaking, it is hydrocephalus. Third, when your thinking doesn't conform to common sense, you say that your brain is short-circuited, just like a circuit board, it burns out and can't work normally. Fourth, when you asked this performance question, did someone just tell you that your brain was short-circuited? Scold him and you'll be fine. Typing is really difficult.

Question 3: When she says that there is something wrong with her brain, how can I reply to her humorously? Suddenly, everyone became a thinker. Life is a painful thing. Modesty without inferiority, self-confidence without arrogance, and freedom without indulgence are difficult to achieve in one's life.

Question 4: The girlfriend said, Are you out of your mind? Where is it? How to answer? There should be no humor. Pay attention when taking a bath, for fear that men will get into the water.

Question 5: If someone says you are nc/ neurotic/brain-damaged, how do you reply? Do you have any medicine? Can it be cured? Have you ever had this disease? I think I'm healthy. You are the one who is sick, aren't you?

Or you can ignore him. I think this is the best response. Just like you were bitten by a dog on the side of the road. You mean you'll come and bite the dog for revenge? What did you say?/Sorry?

Question 6: Ask Baidu, the strongest Baidu in history, who knows God's question and who is on Du Jie's reply tower!

Question 7: I sent a message about being unable to sleep. Others said it was cross-criticism: tossing and turning, asking God to reply with humor. It is windy today. I want to eat out at noon. I wanted to kindly remind her to wear a mask, but when I saw the low-cut dress she was wearing, my mind suddenly went into water. I told her that it was windy outside and it was all gray. Please put on your bra before you go out. The female colleague blushed slightly: "You, you know?"

Question 8: On the Internet, someone asked, "There is a big pit, several hundred meters deep. If you jump, what can you do to get out? " God replied, "I don't need anything else, just hahaha, well written!" " You must be crazy to jump into that pit! Jump into the hole as much as possible!

Question 9: Everyone says I don't have enough brains. Hehe, I guess no one will think their brains are enough, right?

Because if the brain is good enough,

Then you won't work for others.

On the contrary, I should be my own boss.