In-laws toast.

What others do to you is cause and effect, and what you do to others is practice. It is never cleverness but kindness that can conquer people's hearts.

People pay attention to harmony in their communication. In marriage and love, we often judge each other and their families intuitively by whether the other person is kind or not. A kind-hearted person will always think of others and never force others to do things they don't want to do.

When men and women get along, there is a very sensitive topic that has to be mentioned, and that is "trial marriage". In response to this topic, I visited more than 20 female friends around me. Some of them avoid talking about this topic, some are generous and frank, and they also support the trial marriage, because if it is not appropriate, how do you know that the two will be very harmonious after marriage?

However, there is another kind of people who hate this kind of "trial marriage" before marriage, because girls will suffer in this respect. If the trial marriage is known by others and their love fails, not only the girl's reputation will be damaged, but also the next marriage will be unfavorable.

We can't say whether the former view and the latter view are right or wrong. Let's just say that they all represent personal thoughts. There is only one chance to be with another person in a lifetime. How to spend that unforgettable time is up to you. Whether open or conservative, we just need to be loyal to our hearts.

However, if we discuss this topic between men and women, we have to lead to another curious topic: If you insist on a trial marriage before marriage and your girlfriend resolutely opposes it, will you accommodate her? Will it be unkind if you force her to accept your point of view?

I remember a netizen once left me a message backstage and told me his own experience. Boyfriend hopes to test whether they are suitable for marriage through trial marriage, but she thinks that they have just graduated and are in the internship stage, and it is too early to talk about marriage, so she refuses her boyfriend's request.

However, it is this rejection that makes her boyfriend furious. She not only broke up decisively, but also spoke ill of her everywhere, saying that girls not only love to pretend, but also pretend to be lofty. Breaking up brought a great blow to the girl, and she even began to wonder if she was too stubborn and missed true love.

What I want to say is that if it is true love, he won't force you to do anything you don't want to do. The kindness and gentleness of a girl should not be exploited, let alone coerce her into premarital tests with love. This is the embodiment of one's values. It is unkind to force her to accept your idea passively.

Feng Chujie, 26, happened to meet this problem. She strongly refused to try marriage before marriage, thinking it was self-love and irresponsible.

A simple and honest boyfriend gains the trust of his parents.

Feng Chujie knows exactly what he likes about Tian Miao from the countryside. They come from different family backgrounds, but after four years of college classmates, she feels that she knows her honest boyfriend very well. He will never force the girl to do anything. On the contrary, when they are together, the girl is the one who gets the most care and care.

After graduation, they chose to stay in the small county town of the girl's hometown, and her boyfriend rented a house close to the girl's home. Every weekend, my father-in-law invites boys to dinner at home. Tian Miao is not only diligent at home, but also often pushes the girl and her mother in a wheelchair out to bask in the sun. Once, Feng's father sprained his ankle, and he went in and out of the hospital with his back on his back.

Over time, Tian Miao has been deeply rooted in the hearts of this family. Their relationship has also been recognized by Feng's parents. They trust this young man from the countryside, but there is still a question in their hearts: can a spoiled daughter adapt to this man's living habits? They mobilized their daughter to go to the man's house to see what kind of in-laws she was.

But before they left, they also told their daughter: Never stay at the man's house and go home no matter how late it is. It takes four or five hours to get to my boyfriend's house by car. I can go there in the morning and come back at night. Although I'm a little nervous, I can totally do it. There is only one mother in my boyfriend's family, and my father died a few years ago. It is also appropriate to visit your mother-in-law before marriage.

My husband stayed at home all night, and I saw the truth clearly.

Although girls and boys have been in love for several years, they are also affectionate, polite and have no overstepping behavior. Many people may find it incredible, but Feng Chujie is actually a very independent girl. She thinks it is inappropriate to have any trial marriage before entering the marriage. Her boyfriend, Tian Miao, expressed support for this, but did not object.

But after entering the rural in-laws' home, she felt a signal from her mother-in-law's words: that is, she seemed to think that her son and herself had cooked the meal, except for the marriage certificate. At lunch, she specifically clarified to her mother-in-law that she had never done anything out of line with her boyfriend, at least not before marriage. I don't know if this is her illusion. She felt her mother-in-law's face darken rapidly and glared at her son.

In the evening, my mother-in-law tried her best to stay for dinner. The girl was in a hurry to go home, but her mother-in-law refused to let the girl go because it was late and it was not safe to travel at night, so she had to stay. That night, many relatives came to my mother-in-law's house, nominally to watch the fun, but in fact my mother-in-law secretly invited the girl's helper to drink. They took turns toasting and got the girl and her boyfriend drunk. When she woke up, she found herself lying in his bedroom with her boyfriend-this was obviously arranged on purpose.

Although she was sure that nothing had happened, at the same time, she also saw one thing clearly: the three views of her husband's family were really different from hers, and it was difficult to integrate them. Loving a person can be accommodated, but it can't go against the three views. Before marriage, she had said that she would not do anything with her boyfriend, but her mother-in-law still wouldn't, so she had to be reluctant and not kind at all.

For love, I am willing to trust my boyfriend.

Maybe many people will think that the girl just broke up with Tian Miao, but you are all wrong. Feng Chujie is a girl who knows right from wrong. She knows her boyfriend well. That night, her boyfriend was at the mercy of others when he was drunk and unconscious. However, he is her son after all, and she has nothing to do with this family before she marries him. My mother-in-law really went too far.

Early the next morning, the girl called her parents and told them why she stayed at her husband's house all night. They gave her the option to choose what to do. After the girl calmed down, she told the boy's mother that if she wanted them to get married, she wouldn't attend the wedding, and she didn't want to be involved in her marriage after marriage, because she didn't like what she did to herself at all, even hated it.

However, my mother-in-law argued that rural people are like this. When a girl goes to her husband's house for the first time, which one doesn't live with her own man? The girl understands that the conditions in her home are very good, and her mother-in-law does this to insure their relationship so that her son can climb the high branches. However, it is really unacceptable for her to come to this city to help herself by damaging the reputation of others.

For love, she is willing to trust her boyfriend, but she can't accept her mother-in-law and doesn't want to have too much contact with this person. Without saying anything, the girl returned to the city with her boyfriend.

At the wedding, I refused to call mom. You don't deserve it.

She didn't want her mother-in-law to come to her wedding, and Tian Miao didn't object at first. Because he felt that his mother was not decent and kind. As soon as his girlfriend gets angry, he forgets about it. So he totally took it as an angry remark not to let his mother come to the wedding.

This wedding, there is no bride price, no wedding room, and even the place where the young couple live is provided by their parents. Feng Chujie thought that her boyfriend listened to her completely and was still very happy after receiving the certificate. When she got married, she didn't have to see her mother-in-law or face the wave of people she didn't like. However, when a large number of people came to the wedding scene, she was still dumbfounded.

After crustily skin of head walked through the whole process of the wedding, Feng Chujie couldn't wait to ask the groom on the spot why he disobeyed her. Why not say hello to yourself and bring your family? But Tian Miao didn't seem to care about her mood at all. She pretended not to see her blink and arranged for her mother to sit in front of the stage.

Originally, two people only needed to offer tea to the woman's parents, but the mother-in-law was temporarily arranged to sit down, and the master of ceremonies naturally pushed the bride to call her mother. My mother-in-law rolled her eyes and took out a red envelope as change, waiting for her new wife to call her. However, at this time, the girl's mind once again appeared the picture of being forced to lie with Tian Miao. Anger than the microphone, she said to her mother-in-law, "Let me call mom, you don't deserve it!" "

Tian Miao turned against each other and the wedding became noisy.

May be got a marriage certificate, the groom Tian Miao's attitude that day also surprised the girl, he gave her a slap in the face before her voice fell behind, blindsided the girl, and also stunned her parents-in-law.

The groom and groom turned against each other, and the bride cried and accused her mother-in-law of sitting on the stage. A group of guests sat under the stage, either walking or staying, and were forced to eat melons. But after figuring out the ins and outs of the matter, most people still stood on the side of the woman, especially the girl's relatives and friends, and they were even more angry. They felt that this matter was not negotiable and hurried away!

A good wedding became lively. The girl's father saw his beloved daughter suffer indignities on the wedding day. How can he stand it? He demanded an explanation from Tian Miao. My mother-in-law is also involved, saying that my daughter-in-law is melodramatic. What's the big deal about being together before marriage? At this point, it's already water under the bridge. What was originally a matter of two young people has evolved into a matter of two families.

After the wedding was forced to terminate, Feng Chujie dragged Tian Miao to the Civil Affairs Bureau. She doesn't want to go this far with this man. She has planned not to deal with her mother-in-law in her life. Who would have thought that her heart was too soft to make people feel bullied?

Love can be accommodated, but it can't go against the three views.

This incident has had a deep influence on the girl. She feels that her fault lies in that her mother-in-law is her mother-in-law and her husband is her husband. But the influence of family background is deeply rooted. She promised her good mother-in-law not to attend the wedding, but the man's temporary change of heart is the best proof.

Actually, what I want to say is, girl, you are too simple. There will never be a marriage without a family in this world. When you find that what your mother-in-law has done is unacceptable, you have to face a choice: accept it all or break up altogether. Loving a person can be accommodated, but it can't go against the three views.

Mother-in-law is not kind, what you should think about is whether you can become a real family through running-in in marriage in the future. Although it is a personal choice for men and women to try marriage before marriage, forcing others to accept their three views will completely change their nature. Either get stuck in the mire, or pat off the dust and go ashore.

Remember, no matter life or marriage, no one can make up your mind for you. What you have to do is to be yourself firmly. Sometimes, what is wrong is wrong. A small mistake may breed greater disaster, gentleness and understanding, and finally yourself.