The Truth of Being a Daughter-in-law's Love: 36 Strategies to Solve the Problem of Mother-in-law and Daughter-in-law

(1) Don't compete with your mother-in-law for a husband.

The chances of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law falling into the water together are not high. No matter how much your husband loves you, you can't replace her mother. Don't make such a low-level mistake.

(2) Don't be too intimate with your husband in front of your mother-in-law.

"Marrying a daughter-in-law and forgetting her mother" is the biggest heart disease of all mother-in-law. The more your husband loves you, the stronger your mother-in-law's sense of loss and jealousy may be.

(3) Don't boss your husband around in front of your mother-in-law.

My mother-in-law is pregnant with her son who grew up hard in October. Why did she become your exclusive free labor boss? Never tell your husband what to do in front of her mother-in-law, or even beat and scold her husband.

(4) Don't say "your mother" in front of your husband.

Even if your mother-in-law doesn't regard you as her own daughter, she will not be happy to hear you call you "your mother" behind your back, and quickly change it to "our mother".

(5) Don't quarrel with your mother-in-law.

It is absolutely difficult to "travel around the world with good reasons" on family issues. There is no need to judge the right and wrong of black and white, and there is no need to fight for a high and low outcome. It's no use talking more, save time for reasoning.

(6) Don't try to be brave in front of your mother-in-law.

Never try to be brave from beginning to end, thinking that you can support the whole world by yourself, and you can't get carried away. "Small sales", timely weakness.

Don't forget that mother-in-law is a woman.

Don't forget that your mother-in-law is also a woman, so she is as careful, sensitive and fragile as you. If women can be as open-minded as men, maybe everything will be fine.

Don't neglect to take care of your husband. Being good to your husband is good to your mother-in-law.

Every mother wants her children to be happy and find a bosom friend. So, show by actions that you will take good care of her precious son.

Don't let your mother-in-law feel left out, let her realize that she is very important.

Let your mother-in-law continue to display the brilliance of maternal love, let her "guide" you, and make her feel important and alive.

(10) Don't think that your mother-in-law is "not sensible"

The old man is most afraid of the younger generation saying, "You don't know anything, don't talk nonsense with young people!" " If this sentence comes from the mouth of the daughter-in-law, it is a great contempt.

(1 1) Don't lie to your mother-in-law.

Everyone hates being cheated. If the young couple keep everything from the old man, or perfunctory and tell the truth, the mother-in-law will naturally feel rejected, which will definitely make her sad and angry.

(12) Don't be stingy with your praise for your mother-in-law.

Good wife, boast; Good grandma, boast. Praise her sincerely, praise her for raising a good son, praise her for her high spirits, praise her for her exquisite cooking and praise her for keeping a good house.

(13) Don't take credit for your mother-in-law.

Mother-in-law's greatest contribution is the lubricant to soften the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law Learn from your mother-in-law with an open mind and ensure her status as the "empress dowager" will remain unchanged for ten thousand years.

(14) Don't say "my son/daughter …" in front of her mother-in-law, say "your grandson/granddaughter …"

There is nothing wrong with "my son" with a strong sense of belonging, but it is easy to anger her mother-in-law, as if the child has nothing to do with her grandparents' family, or she feels that her grandson has been with her for so long.

(15) Don't ignore the role of grandchildren.

If you say "Your grandson/granddaughter misses you all day" or "Jiao Zi, your grandson/granddaughter loves to eat your bag", the mother-in-law will laugh from ear to ear at once, and the distance between them will be shortened instantly.

(16) Don't discuss everything with your mother-in-law.

Tell her often, or let her see what you have done, what are your plans, pay attention to her existence, ask her for advice and eliminate her anxiety.

(17) Don't try to change your mother-in-law.

Everyone has his own habits and hobbies, so we should respect each other. Don't expect your mother-in-law in her fifties and sixties to fully accept your outlook on life and values overnight.

(18) Don't tell the old man about her mother-in-law.

The man sandwiched between mother and daughter-in-law is the most pitiful. If he is a "double-sided adhesive", he will definitely take the initiative to stand up and coordinate; Otherwise, even if you complain, it won't help, it will only increase your husband's troubles.

(19) Don't speak ill of your mother-in-law in front of outsiders.

Mother-in-law gets together to say daughter-in-law, and daughter-in-law gets together to say mother-in-law. Women always seem to gossip like this. Please remember, "criticism is like a dove, it will always fly back."

(20) Don't forget to be caring and attentive, and don't forget Zhu Dexiao first.

Heartfelt concern and greetings are unnecessary. It is the daughter-in-law's responsibility and obligation to honor the elders, and it is impossible to measure the gains and losses, let alone ask for a return.

(2 1) Don't forget to express your gratitude to your mother-in-law, even if it's just out of courtesy.

Thank your mother-in-law. Although she didn't raise you, she raised your husband. Although she may not have taken care of you, she may have taken care of your children.

Don't underestimate the power of apology.

Family chores are complicated, and someone must "surrender" after the conflict. A serious and playful apology is a lubricant for the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, which can effectively smooth the cracks.

Don't hesitate to give your mother-in-law a gift.

On holidays, buy some small gifts and feel at ease. If you take pains to find what your mother-in-law expects, it will definitely make her happy.

(24) Don't dress up too fancy or even different in front of your mother-in-law.

Most of the elderly are conservative, especially the mother-in-law certainly doesn't want her daughter-in-law to "dress up beautifully", so it's easy to judge people by their appearances and dress cleanly and generously.

(25) Don't completely deny your mother-in-law's opinion.

Mother-in-law's words can be rejected, but don't totally deny them because of the conflict. We should treat them objectively and fairly, take good advice, skip all the unfavorable parts and leave no trace.

(26) Don't force yourself to meet all the standards of your mother-in-law.

The root of the difficulties of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is that they always want to adapt to each other and please each other, so they are exhausted. Don't go too far unless you want to.

(27) Don't exaggerate the grievances suffered in the husband's family.

When people get along with each other, there will be friction, and trivial matters need not be taken to heart. Haggle over every ounce will only make you hard to let go. A little unhappy, just laugh it off.

(28) Don't compare your mother-in-law with your mother, and don't use your mother's standards to ask your mother-in-law.

Without kinship, there is a natural lack of instinctive tolerance and understanding. Meet a good mother-in-law, cherish and be grateful; When something bad happens, I won't be disappointed or complain.

(29) Don't treat your mother-in-law as a free nanny.

The old man has worked hard all his life, and it is also time to enjoy life. The rest of her life is completely under her control. Help you share the housework and help you take care of the children. Sincerely grateful. Never blame your mother-in-law for not helping you.

Don't accuse your mother-in-law of being frugal or stingy.

She may not accept the modern consumption concept, and may think that her daughter-in-law is a prodigal son who spends money like water. However, you have to understand that thrift is a habit left over from decades of poverty.

(3 1) Don't dominate everything in the house.

Women are naturally controlling and paranoid about details. What things are placed in which position at home must be according to your own wishes. But "one mountain can't accommodate two tigers", leaving a little room for my mother-in-law.

Don't be angry and run back to your mother's house.

Your mother's family is an occasional refuge, but not a permanent refuge. Not only does your mother-in-law dislike you more, but her husband will certainly be annoyed.

Don't always praise your family and belittle your husband's family.

Everyone knows that family members are close, love themselves and think for themselves, but don't show your dissatisfaction in the in-laws' house, which will only intensify the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. More tolerance and understanding.

(34) Don't pull your father-in-law in front of you and oppose your mother-in-law.

In addition to the key figure "husband", there is also the important role of "father-in-law" in the problem of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. If you "rob" your mother-in-law's son and "appease" her husband, then your mother-in-law relationship is basically hopeless.

Don't quarrel with your mother-in-law, for whatever reason.

Even if your mother-in-law is bossy, don't stand up to her. You can turn a blind eye and turn a deaf ear, but don't quarrel, it's just an emotional vent, which doesn't help solve the problem.

No cohabitation.

Almost all the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law who have problems have this wish, but due to the limitation of objective conditions, it may not be realized. Distance produces beauty. Only by narrowing the distance between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law can a good relationship be produced.