I cheated on you several times in my marriage. What should I do during trust reconstruction?

You have to make it clear that you did something wrong to each other during your marriage, so you mentioned an affair later. You must sincerely apologize to each other and ask for forgiveness. At the same time, thank her for her generosity. Correct attitude is an important bridge to open friendly communication with each other, and it is also the first step to ease your marriage relationship. No matter what the other party says, even if you don't want to, even if you have reason to refute it in your heart, you shouldn't show it in your behavior. Because, after all, you made the mistake first, and after letting the other person see your sincere attitude of admitting your mistake, her inner dissatisfaction and imbalance, and even her dislike for you will be reduced accordingly, which will also lay a good foundation for the healthy development of your marriage in the future.

Second, confess in advance.

In your narrative, you said that you played games with your female colleagues, and after your wife found out, you tried to cover it up with lies. Maybe your original intention is not to let the other person misunderstand. And there is nothing wrong with normal communication with the opposite sex, but it is because of your concealment that your wife who has lost trust in you will think more. Therefore, the only way to solve the problem is to say hello to your wife in advance before interacting with any opposite sex. For example, I will play games with my colleagues tonight, and one of them is a woman. Just in advance, we are just ordinary colleagues. Such a frank account will be much better than the other party's defense after finding you, or even making up lies and being exposed. In addition, in the process of interacting with other members of the opposite sex, you should try to consider the time factor, that is, if it is very late, try not to meet or even call other members of the opposite sex alone. Pay attention to discretion when talking to the opposite sex in the process of communication. Don't be sarcastic. If you can, you might as well ask your wife to check her mobile phone at any time without a password. I think if you can do it, the other party will greatly increase their trust in you.

Third, enhance feelings.

The infidelity in marriage was discovered by the other party. The cheating party is sad because she thinks you don't love him anymore, or your love for him is not so pure. So she will be sad. The root cause of her sadness is actually that your feelings are different. Therefore, if you want the other person to trust you more, you might as well put more time, energy and care on your lover. If you can care about her in every way and let her realize your care and love for her, then the relationship between you will gradually heat up. Because many women will never doubt each other's infidelity under the premise of being loved by their husbands. Even when they find that other women are close to their husbands, they don't think much. Because she feels that her husband only loves her and will not be tempted by other opposite sex at all.

If the above three methods haven't solved your problem, then you might as well arrange a time for both sides to sit down and have a good talk in a state of mutual emotional stability. Let the other person say what you want to do so that she will be satisfied and trust you. Whatever she asks, don't argue. Try hard, if you can't. Negotiate with him again, don't deny any proposal from the other side as soon as you come up. Because she feels that after some of her requirements are implemented by you, she will definitely feel your sincerity. Then even if you don't meet your personal requirements, she will give you corresponding understanding and relax your requirements. Because he thinks you have changed for him, which is much better than rejecting some of her proposals from the beginning.

The above methods are necessary to help you gain the trust of the other party quickly. At the same time, I also suggest that if you want to keep your marriage in a good state, you might as well. Both sides should communicate more and find a mode to make life more interesting. The most suitable way to maintain feelings. For example, two people regularly go to have romantic candlelight dinners, watch movies and talk to each other. Maybe more romantic knickknacks in the room will make your family feel warm. At the same time, in life, you should try to tell each other what you need and what you want them to change in a gentle way, and strive for mutual understanding and deepen feelings through constant running-in. When your relationship is getting better and better, you no longer need some fresh stimulation or spiritual comfort from the outside world. I hope you can go without forgetting your initial intention and run your marriage better. I also hope that you can find new ways to make yourself happier after you get married.

I wish you a hundred years of harmony! ?