It's time to look at the child's "back"

This is really a contradictory article.

This is really a contradictory article.

As we age, we will definitely see photos and interactions between friends and their children on Facebook every day. We use this to share fun places, and it is easy to find that parents with different personalities have different "playstyles". Too same.

There are various activities, but for me, there are only two types: "playing with children" and "playing with children".

Giving birth to a child is bittersweet. Some people say that one of the greatest joys is having an extra playmate. Parents who have childhood memories can relive their old dreams and talk about them. There is no childhood that can just happen again. , taking the children to the mountains and sea, just to play crazier than the children; or when the children are still young and can be at the mercy of their parents, they can be a real-life doll to satisfy their own little vanity desires and dress up in photos. My lovely baby, that feeling of accomplishment is really indescribable.

When the child was still young, it was understandable that the parents would arrange various activities for him first. However, as the child grew older, this method of "playing with children" probably They will start to hit a wall, and many parents will begin to maladaptive.

Some children who develop their self-awareness early will start to have ideas when they are about three years old. Four or five years old should be the time when children have the most "assertiveness". They will refuse, invite, and express impatience. Will actively participate. For example, I often hear the same conversation: "Brother, let's go somewhere else to play. You have played on the slide here many times!" "What's so fun about this?" That thing is more interesting, go and try it. "Okay, I'll play with you later. You look at the camera first and mom takes a picture, hurry up"... I think everyone should have pictures of arguments and pulling in their minds.

Simply put, when we choose activities, are we satisfying ourselves or our children?

A friend said: "But my children have never tried it, how do they know whether they like it or not?" "Oh my God, working from Monday to Friday is hard enough. Can't I really go to a place I like on weekends?" "There's nothing I can do. If I feel bored, even if he likes me, I won't last long, so it's better to rest at home." 』

Indeed, no matter what the children’s answers are, most of them are related to their mood at the time. In fact, they don’t have much information to judge their likes and dislikes. I have also suffered from frustration. My sister obviously said she liked it, but when she arrived at the scene, she was not interested, which made me a little angry. If we only listened to the children's favorite choices, we probably wouldn't have to go anywhere, and the park and Tom Bear could send them away. So, don’t shoot yourself in the foot. Avoid choosing to participate in a single activity, but choose the “place” you want to go to. Because no matter where it is, it can be attacked, defended, advanced or retreated. The surrounding environment or shops are hinterland. Children can usually have fun on their own, and both adults and children can find what they need and everyone is happy!

Next time, we have to deal with the "invitations" from the children. My sister always pulls me to do everything. I can rarely stay away from other things and do my own thing leisurely. Over the past few years, I have developed a lot of ability to enjoy myself. Being invited by my children is an affirmation. At least he always I want to be with you all the time, so I have to adjust my mentality first. This is "happiness" not "punishment".

The biggest difference between "playing with children" and "playing with children" is who decides how to play. The "Back View" written by Zhu Ziqing allows us to keep the kindness of our parents in our hearts. Now we can use this principle to test ourselves; so most of the time, I am like a loyal "family dog", following the little master's footsteps. Moving forward from behind, I will go wherever she goes. If she wants to stop, I will stay with her. When she calls me, I will answer. When she remains silent, I will not talk too much. Of course, occasionally you can be naughty or cheat a little, and when you are tired, you can call it quits and resume your role as a parent. Sometimes you can be surprised to find how touching your children's empathy is.

Oh, by the way, I actually took some time to "quit" the camera. People who play with children need to be more attentive. Children are not props or fashion accessories. Leave the life record to another helper. Well, or just keep it in the beautiful memories of us and our children. This is the secret garden of each other’s memories, right?

* This article is published with permission from What Children Teach Us and is prohibited from reprinting without consent

"This article is the opinion of the carefully selected author of the cooperation and does not represent the position"