Joke Collection Website - Talk about mood - Tell me about those who haven't been on qq recently

Tell me about those who haven't been on qq recently

Sadness is not born, but begins with love.

Play a play in a flower season.

Buy insurance-it hurts when you don't use it, and it hurts more when you use it.

Dear, if you want to get your heart back, will you continue to love me?

The courage to say I love you is about to disappear in the air, and I can't catch it.

There are many disappointments in life, and only comparison can lead to happiness.

I only lied to him for one day, but he lied to me all his life.

(12940) In reality, fortunately, goods are always in short supply.

When I paid the phone bill, I found my words so valuable.

I miss you like wine, and I get drunk when I drink it. When I am drunk, I read this sad moonlight with all my enthusiasm. So, I was drunk on the moon, drunk at night, and I was drunk.

You have two feet on both sides. You rowed beautifully.

Everyone who says he doesn't want to fall in love has an impossible person in his heart.

Living in this virtual world, I live my own virtual life.

"Can money and entertainment last until the end?"

(7) Who is waiting for whom when flowers bloom on the other side?

The furthest distance in the world is that two people are back to back and can never meet each other.

We will never regard each other as irreplaceable as before; We will never love as hard as before until we cry.

Accompany you to finish this road, and you will become the road I pass by.

If you can, please don't forget. When the wound heals, you must be willing to leave.

Through the fleeting time in your eyes, I believe that you really loved me, just as I really lived and died for you.

One day, I finally stopped thinking about him, because he has been away for too long, and my habit is no longer a habit.

You dug my grave yourself, and I'll lie down even if I play dead.

Talk about insurance. Buy insurance. All right, tell me.

1. Today, my wife asked me why I bought insurance for myself instead of her! I said I have a guarantee for your future! In case I die, the insurance company will pay you and your son a lot of money! She called me selfish! What if I'm not dead? All right! You are so cruel! I wish myself a long life.

I want to send you roses, but it's too expensive. I want to comfort you, but I haven't learned it yet. I want to kneel to you, but the ring is still in the safe. I can only send messages to chase you. I hope we will never screw up. Happy Valentine's Day!

Dad went to work in the morning and his car was scratched by someone else's car. The other party is a woman, a little bruised! Then the woman insisted on losing money, wow. Because I'm not here, I can't say whose responsibility it is! But that woman has been dragging my dad and making him lose money or something! My dad called me when he didn't know. I said the insurance company will take care of the car scratch. What's your hurry? If not, call the traffic police. If she's sorry, call the police!

I only blame myself for being too young and honest. Said I was inexperienced, why did I have to be broken into houses and safe boxes several times? Who needs this experience?

5. I was really touched by the sentence of deformation meter Yang Tongmeng, "It's nothing to change my life for my life, but I have insurance".

You said your departure was my loss, but I'm sorry, I bought insurance.

7. What is the fear of trading one life for another? I have insurance.

8. A person works in a bank, and the whole family is very busy. A person doing insurance, the whole family is shameless. Playing the stock market alone, the whole family jumps together. Playing computer alone makes the whole family brainless.

9. One day, I suddenly got a call from a female client. What exactly does your insurance cover? Answer and insure against accidents. Did she make any compensation for the unexpected pregnancy? I'll go back and tell her, is there a scene?

10, people who long for stability must be insured if they want to take risks in love.

1 1. Customer: Buy a life insurance for my wife, and the beneficiary will write to me. How much do I get if she dies? Xiao Ming: At least 20 years in prison. Governor: Go away.

12, Wukong, be sure to find out the password of a small vault, a safe and a safe in Bajie's ear.

13, someone lost his car and went to the insurance company to claim compensation. The person in charge said, "Sorry, we have no money to compensate, so we can only compensate you for a new car." "Ah", shall I buy insurance for my wife now? "Smile, you will be more beautiful.

14, a mayor was double-detained, and the big safe at home could not be opened for a long time. Officials and experts of the CPC Central Commission for Discipline Inspection said that this is a voice-activated lock, and the password is eight characters. Investigators took turns to guess that "every man for himself, the devil takes the hindmost", "God bless, promotion and wealth" and "man dies for wealth, birds die for food" … all failed! Helplessly detained the mayor. He cleared his throat and said with a strong accent, "Be honest and clean, and govern for the people!" " The door opened, and the cabinet full of jewels shocked everyone.

15, some people say that marriage is the grave of love, burying passion; Some people think that marriage is a besieged city, and people inside and outside the city are wandering. However, the really beautiful things are more like preservatives and insurance for love. Only love can sanctify marriage, and only a marriage that sanctifies love is a real marriage.

16, since I bought insurance, I don't have to look at the traffic lights when crossing the road.

17, love has an insurance period, so we "feel like death" in love and "feel like death" in marriage, so there is a saying that marriage is a cage.

18, female: "As long as I have money, I will marry who." Man: "Will you marry the safe in the bank?"

19, the whole world seems to have no electricity @ The only thing that can't hurt me is insurance @

20. I suddenly received a phone call from a female customer. What exactly does your insurance cover? Answer and insure against accidents. Did she make any compensation for the unexpected pregnancy? I'll go back and tell her, is there a scene? Beep, beep. . . She hung up the phone.

2 1, Kligo mentioned two reasons why some people can't achieve what they have achieved today: 1. You still have a way out. You are in no hurry to make money. Someone supports you. You haven't lost enough, and your experience is not bad enough. When you watch the beloved woman being forced to marry someone else because of your debt collection, the underworld is pointing a knife at you, when your son is forced to drop out of school because of you, and your mother is forced to sell insurance to support her family, can't you do it?

22. In our life, insurance is only a way to provide people with adequate and certain protection. A life without security not only affects our health and career, but also affects our happiness. Only those who are fully protected will have a happier life. Because it not only reduces our worries about future risks and makes our life easier, but also acts as an umbrella for our life when risks and misfortunes come, so that our family, career and health will not collapse completely in the storm and continue to live happily.

23. "Xiong Haizi pulled over and was later killed by a car." "It's okay. I have insurance. "

24. I am not afraid of fighting. If this is a big event, I will change my life. I have insurance.

25. What are you afraid of if you live alone? I have insurance.

26. I haven't seen the red light since I bought insurance.

27. In fact, it may not be so romantic, but blind date is indeed the safest way to find a marriage. Family background, height, physical appearance, education and even whether the family has genetic reasons may be clear at a glance, thus avoiding the danger of marriage to the greatest extent. For marriage, this is obviously the most affordable.

I want to send you roses, but it's too expensive. I want to comfort you, but I haven't learned it yet. I want to kneel to you, but the ring is still in the safe. I can only send messages to chase you. I hope we will never screw up.

29. Three suicide notes: "The passbook is in the password box, the password box is in the safe, and the safe key is sandwiched in the passbook".

30. If you are afraid to lie down, please buy insurance for my baby. I can't stand you. This is my business. If you die, I will tattoo a spell on your face. A word of advice: don't be too mean to yourself.

3 1. There are too many children with fever and illness in the class in recent days. After my son made Xue Jun moon cakes, he got up the next morning and said that his throat was itchy and showed signs of inflammation. Yesterday, he went to buy medicine, Pudilan oral liquid and Yanbian granules. Today, he decided not to let his children go to kindergarten. Even the head teacher was ill, and several children in the class went with illness, so I don't think he can go to school today. It's not serious, so don't go again.

32. "A life is worth a life. What are you afraid of? I have insurance. " "... "

33. In order to welcome the most serious and high-end visit and reception activities since I went to work, I have worn out the sales style of insurance companies.

34. Who is selling our personal information? My relatives, classmates and friends don't know that I have a baby. How do your insurance companies and big photography companies know?

35. Since I bought insurance, I've just crossed the street.

Since I bought insurance, I don't have to look at the traffic lights when crossing the road.

37. Give way ahead, those who have not bought insurance are on the side, and those who have bought insurance are in the middle.

38. Law of Kissing: After the first kiss, women will regard it as an investment and expect to profit from it; Men will put it in the safe as a recovered loan.

39, I am not afraid of death, I have insurance! -Toarey Yang

40. Children are not parents' cash cows, nor are they parents' safes for raising children and preventing old age, nor are they parents' dreams of realizing their lost dreams. It is the responsibility and obligation of every parent and elder to give him (her) care and love, watch him (her) be happy and accompany him (her) to grow up physically and mentally.

4 1, destroyed: Then I silently handed over a business card that said Ping An Insurance.

42. While the baby was asleep, I sorted out my circle of friends, deleted the seconds I didn't know, blocked the circle of friends of employees of insurance companies who had business contacts but were unfamiliar, and blocked the WeChat business that had been selling things that were not of interest, and all the names were remembered. This is also a big project.

43. My deskmate bought you insurance today. Really, I will crush you later. What are you afraid of? You bought me insurance "and" I wrote that the beneficiary is me "

44. One life is worth one life. I am afraid that I have insurance to protect Yang.

45, this may be a natural tendency of people. In this case, when you get married, it is for insurance after you get old. On the surface, it is love, but in fact it is an insurance after aging.

46. When a person is working hard outside, an insurance is a love and commitment to his family. It only takes one year to take out half of your salary and deposit it in the insurance company, so you can bring this protection to your family. The final guarantee is yours, the money is yours and the interest is yours. I deposited it today. What about you?

47. China Merchants Bank's credit card is awesome. Did you still think so when it was stolen? 28。 On June 22nd, 0 10 105555 said that the Credit Card Insurance Financial Service Center of China Merchants Bank called to promote insurance advertisements. The name and location are detailed to the date of birth of the community. Why don't you know that my China Merchants Bank credit card has a record of being stolen by 5660? Fraud with another department number of China Merchants Bank under the banner of China Merchants Bank. Who gave you my information?

48. This woman is crazy. She swore when she opened her mouth and didn't buy insurance from her. The quality is unbelievable. Everyone should be alert to her and let you be gentle and patient before buying. If you don't want to buy her, I'll scold you immediately ~ I really don't want to scold her for fear of getting my mouth dirty. I hope she didn't get what she deserved. This is just an insurance policy. This man is too bad.

49. A person works in a bank, and the whole family is very busy. A person doing insurance, the whole family is shameless. Playing the stock market alone, the whole family jumps together. Playing computer alone makes the whole family brainless! Hmm. How interesting

50. Qian Zhongshu said that marriage is like a besieged city. Want to come out inside, want to go in outside. In fact, in my opinion, marriage is more like sailing in the water. Women are water and men are boats. Married men may have understood that water can carry a boat and overturn it. So the safest love is never to get married.

Painful qq signature

1. If you want to say something, you will say it naturally. If you don't want to tell, all you hear is lies.

2. Clear your mind and keep walking. If you miss the flowers, you will reap the rain. If you miss this one, you will meet the next one.

3. Among thousands of people, meet the person you met; In thousands of years, in the boundless wilderness of time, we happened to catch up, neither earlier nor later.

4. If you are in love, don't miss the opportunity easily. Reckless, may make you regret for a while; Cowardice may make you regret it all your life.

5, you use silence to avoid me, then I will help you with no contact.

6, from scratch, from scratch, only one word has changed, but once.

7. The most precious thing in life is actually not external things, but another person.

8. You're just a passer-by, I'm just passing by, we're just passing by.

9, high heels can't walk out of my inferiority complex, and the gap with you can't be solved by a high heel.

10, I gave you special care, but you gave me access. This is the distance.

1 1, we don't need too much care, we just need a little care.

12, it turns out that your every move can still touch my heart.

13. What we thought we were obsessed with was forgotten in the process of our obsession.

Maybe this is love. Miss, care, expect, meet, smile, and then cry.

15, spring water is born, spring forest is in full bloom, and the spring breeze is ten miles, not as good as you.

16, no matter how important people are, they let you down a lot and become unimportant.

17, just like the wildcats in the alley give more sweetness, they just pass by like passers-by.

18. How long should a person endure the pain that he should not bear? When he adapted to this painful environment, should he be said to be lucky or unlucky?

19, please take a look from my standpoint.

20. I want someone who can shelter me from the wind and rain, not be my ups and downs.

2 1, ask the sky from a distance, where is happiness, if there is no chance, then find another way.

22, now I know that even the memories are so unbearable, after all, it hurts too much.

23. Sad swings are always accompanied by a breeze. There are always stars in the lonely night. When I suddenly look back, you are no longer with me.

24. Only when things have changed can people know how to miss.

25. I touched your persistence and your concern. In the drifting and closed cabin, only your name is bright and transparent.

26. The biggest joke in my life is to take the reason why he refused as my goal now!

I want to be a tooth in my next life. When I am unhappy, someone always hurts me.

28. Chocolate is bitter and toffee is sweet, but chocolate is always more expensive than toffee.

29. I will pass you by in the future. No future, no hope.

30. I don't want much, as long as I am by your side in the name of a friend.

3 1, time is like a net, where you sow, you reap.

32. I think I should lock myself up, so that I won't run around, I won't be sad, and my life will be as good as ever.

33. Occasionally I will hear a song, see a seemingly familiar picture, and burst into tears with a deja vu smile.

34. You see everything, but you don't see me. You believe me when I say I don't love you. You believe me when I say I did a good job.

35. Don't worry about others too easily. In the end, only one heartless person can be left.

I know I am your will, but I still regard you as my whole.

37. The sand along the coast is piled up on the shore. I fantasize about seeing the blue sea and sky, hearing the rough waves and feeling the sea breeze. Bury yourself in it and let go of your uncontrollable thoughts.

38. The furthest distance in the world is not that you don't know I love you when I am in front of you, but I love you and introduce you to someone with a smile.

39. I once fed a hypocritical beast with a sincere heart.

40. It's like your hands are red and swollen with cold in winter, and then you are poured with boiling water, which is a terrible pain.

4 1, thank you for leaving me halfway and letting me see something I haven't seen before.

42. Life is only a few decades. Let go of love for how long? Maybe something will happen one day. How many people can you meet that you really love?

43. Happiness is to persist in what should be adhered to and give up what should be given up.

44. The past will never come back, and what comes back will never be like the past.

45. People with deep karma are always looking at the shortcomings and deficiencies of others. A true man of practice will never look at the mistakes and shortcomings of others.

I would rather give up the whole forest than hang myself on this dead tree.

47. You are always so self-righteous in time, but my heart is broken by you.

48. I am afraid that after teaching you tenderness and romance, I will use it on others.

49. I want you to be happy more than anyone. I just think that your happiness in the future is not because I will still be very sad.

50. I have regretted giving up on you, and my heart aches, but I never thought you would come back.

5 1, sometimes what you say to me is beautiful, sometimes what you say seems to fall into a cold lake, it doesn't matter, you are a roller coaster, I'm used to it.

52. Baidu is omnipotent, and I can't find out where my happiness lies.

53. Origin, I saw you in the crowd; Fate, I see you, in the crowd.

54. In the past, there was an ancient city. In an old site of the city, there lived an old man, humming old songs and watching the desolate old sunshine.

55, you secretly broke into my world, let me at a loss; But secretly left my world and hurt me.

56. There is no love at first sight in the world. The so-called love at first sight is just that you meet the person you've always wanted to see.

57. Love is having someone who will make you cry for a while and make you laugh for a while.

58. Why give me a withered flower, if you love me not in your heart.

59. It's easy to find someone to drink snowflakes with you, but it's difficult to meet someone to accompany you through the world.

60. Not crying doesn't mean I'm happy, and not saying it doesn't mean I don't care.

6 1, once the seas run dry and the rocks crumble, you can't get along well.

62. I made a wish in front of the Buddha, hoping to become a small tree and stand by the roadside where you pass every day. I hang love and miss all over the branches, hoping that one day you will fall in love with me!

63. I will walk out of your world gracefully and face my new life calmly.

64. Thinking about your own taste is like drinking a glass of cold water and then condensing into tears.

65. Tears of frustration and sadness, such as the sea bursting its banks and surging, how can you heal all wounds with your delicate hands?

66. There will always be someone in everyone's heart who wants to touch and throw away.

67. Even if I am as good as 1 million, you can't see it, because you don't have a pair of eyes that love me.

It really doesn't matter whether I can stay with you in the end.

69. Have you noticed that the secret work we are doing now is not a stranger, but the most familiar stranger.

70. I left you not because I don't love you, but because you don't know how to cherish.

7 1, finally one day, I don't know why, the bees flapped their wings and flew a little higher. At this time, it found flowers everywhere around the withered rose.

72. Forever in my mouth has finally turned into a hurried year.

73. Suddenly, I seem to have fallen into icehouse, from the tip of my heart to my toes.

74. You never read my mind, but you blame me for being fickle and difficult to understand.

75. Not all pains need shouting, not all regrets need filling, and the most painful thing is not parting, but memories after parting.

76. If I am no longer willful; If I go back to the day I broke up, can I start over?

77. He can cry with me, laugh with me, grow up with me and be childish with me, but we won't be together.

78, the heart is micro-moving, but the feelings are far away, people are not, things are not, and the past cannot be chased.

79. I once passed your heart, not because I didn't want to stay, but because you refused to accept it.

80. You are perfunctory, I am lying, and nobody really cares anyway.

8 1, our love finally turned into a memory, lingering until death do us part.

82. No one likes loneliness, but loneliness is more practical than disappointment.

83. I have never been sad because I have never met. Never happy.

84. She always insists on putting quality before quantity, believing that the best is worth waiting patiently, but the last red apple is usually sour, and the thrilling great love can't wait.

85. There are always some things that will stay in the deepest part of life, happiness and sadness. Everything has become the past, and you can still feel the truth and touch the hypocrisy and sadness.

86. You have lived in my heart for many years. I spared many people, but I never spared you.

87. No one will die if he leaves, but the degree of pain is different.

If I say I want to be alone, I actually need you more than ever.

89. Here's to you. Get ahead and have a bright future. Don't contact again.

90. Who is a passer-by in his life, who is the wheel of his life, the dust of past lives, the wind of this life, and the soul of endless sadness. In the end, no one belongs to anyone.

9 1, young love can be quiet, but in the years to come, I will always walk in the scenery without you.

92. I never really owned you, but I seem to have lost you ten thousand times.

93. The most uncomfortable missing is not that the other person doesn't know your missing, but that he knows but doesn't care.

94. Rose said: Not all flowers represent love; Diamonds say: not all diamonds represent eternity.

When it hurts, it will be sad and uncomfortable, and there is no way. It feels particularly obvious.

First, I fell in love earlier than you, and you love me less.

Second, not liking this person is the beginning of love, and continuing to like this person is the end of love.

Third, no one will always be smooth sailing. Everyone has bitten their teeth to get through the trough, and only told the closest people to collapse and cry. What outsiders see is that everything is fine in the spring breeze. Only when you succeed can you openly talk about failure, and failure will become a part of success. May you be stronger, and then one day, you can smile and say those moments that make you cry. At this time, you really should let go.

Fourth, people who want to leave you have a thousand reasons, and those who want to accompany you can't get rid of it.

Five, the heart is like a lotus, and life will be fragrance all the way. We often get lost in our own hearts: when we are inferior to others, we will be jealous and lose our composure; When an accident happens, you will be flustered and lose your composure; When you lose a loved one, you will lose your mind and despair. Only when the heart is quiet and peaceful will it not be influenced by the outside world. Heart like lotus is smiling in quiet years, abandoning inner struggle, evil thoughts and vanity and living freely.

When I was young, I cared about other people's opinions in order to prove that what I did was right or wrong. Later, I became more and more mature and found that no matter what others say about you, whether you are cute or hateful, it has little to do with yourself. The happiest thing is to be able to stick to yourself, not be influenced by others, live the life you want and be yourself. It is not easy for everyone. If someone likes to talk about you, just say so, as long as he is happy.

Seven, reliable life characteristics are roughly six words: less words, hard work, peace of mind.

Eight, the past page, don't turn it if you can't turn it. If you turn over the dust, you will lose your eyes. Some people can't say anything good, but no one can replace them! Those who once said that they would never part have already been scattered all over the world. Pack up your mood and keep walking. If you miss the flowers, you will reap the rain. If you miss this one, you will meet the next one.

I only have two wishes: you are by your side, by your side.

If you can't avoid it, you have to endure it. Can't stand what life is destined to endure, it is weakness and stupidity.

1 1. You are your own sun and don't depend on anyone's light.

Twelve, finally in the process of growing up, I vaguely felt the power of time. It can cut everything and repair everything. Only time is the touchstone of vows, and the veil of truth and falsehood will be lifted when it is handed over to time.

If you love deeply, please walk side by side in time.

Fourteen, the world is a fool's carnival, and we are all silly and willing, so we are brave enough to be ourselves and waste our lives mercilessly. In fact, it is the great self who has always been with you.

15. Success is a difficult thing. Everyone knows, but don't be too nervous. You have to have your own life. If you have someone you like, pursue it, even if it turns out to be a miss. If you have a dream you want, realize it, even if the last one is empty. Failure is nothing, everyone is rejected sometimes, but fate is such a process of accumulation. One day, your dream suddenly came true. You think you are lucky, but you are not. This is a late gift.

Sixteen, don't be confused, don't fall in love, don't be afraid of the future, don't be so happy.

Seventeen, every powerful person, bite a tooth to spend a period of no help, no support, no one to be caring and attentive. In the past, this was your bar mitzvah. If you can't get through, beg for mercy. This is your bottomless pit.

18. Some people keep growing because they absolutely have the power to persist. Good at reading, willing to work hard, not only reading, but also taking notes. There must be a reason for people to grow up, and the effort and accumulation behind it must be several times that of ordinary people. Therefore, the key lies in yourself.

Why does a woman attach so much importance to her work? I work hard, so that when I meet the person I love, whether he is rich or has nothing, I can open my hand and embrace him frankly. I don't feel aloof if he is rich, and we won't be down and out if he is poor. This is the meaning of women's efforts! ! ! Life without a princess must have a queen's heart!

20. Never mentioning that I loved you is like acting. The tears I left you were just acting.

Life is a process, full of twists and turns, ups and downs, with happy days and many lost places. We just spend our lives in bitterness and happiness, but when we are happy, we are easily intoxicated and get carried away, and the impression may be slight. When I am in pain, I feel sad and uncomfortable. I can't help it, it feels particularly obvious.

Twenty-two years old, I've always wanted to walk that beautiful path with you. There are soft winds and white clouds, and you are by my side, listening to my happy and grateful heart.

If you meet someone who likes to be hot and cold with you, please turn around and leave. If you meet someone who likes to play hide-and-seek with you often and doesn't send text messages, please leave decisively. If you meet someone who likes to have an affair with you but doesn't make any promises, please leave quickly. Leave is to meet that person with a firm heart, and leave is for better happiness. All contacts that are not entrusted by life are hooligans, because those who pursue stability and permanence can't afford to be hurt!

Twenty-four, the mountains and rivers are forgotten, and the sun and the moon are original. Because of accident and coincidence, we created a harmonious movement of piano and harp with the floating life of two people, which connected the mountains and rivers and made the sun and the moon shine together. But in the end, we realized that no matter how high the mountain is and how clear the water is, one is still looking up at the sky and the other is still nourishing the land, although the same body is different from the heart; The sun is bright again, and the moon is hazy again. One is obvious during the day and the other is obvious at night. Although it is the same light, it is not the same time.

Twenty-five, the courage to refuse, and do not need to provide reasons, is the real freedom.