Without people, the sky will fall!

Losing something is also a big deal. As long as people are still there, they will gradually be there. However, if people are lost, whether they are newborn babies, babbling children, primary school students, middle school students, or adult men and women, once parents, couples, grandparents in other people's mouths suddenly disappear, it will be very different for relatives, friends, colleagues and classmates (collectively referred to as important people). It really looks like the sky is falling! We have seen too many cases of missing persons in real life and film and television dramas. The anxiety and yearning of family members are clear at a glance, and it is needless to say that people are deeply moved after reading it!

Let's talk about why the loss of a living person has such a great influence:

Since a person is lost, TA must have his biological parents, grandparents, brothers and sisters, uncles and aunts and other relatives who are important because of their parents. TA is directly or indirectly related to these people. Living together every day is warm and lively. Even if TA is a newborn baby, she has been taken care of by her future parents and grandparents before she came to this world. Moreover, once this "child" is born, she becomes a vivid and tangible person with rich expressions, actions and language responses to the sounds and stimuli of the environment and relatives. After that, TA became a member of our human beings and became ours.

It is conceivable that if such a new life suddenly disappears, it is equivalent to the sudden disappearance of an important node in the original intact intimate relationship network. How can we not let important relatives worry? Even after most of the important relatives of the missing persons have failed for a period of time, they will still have an idea they don't want to think about-whether TA is dead or alive, whether he wants to see someone or from ruin, he must let me know the whereabouts of TA, otherwise so many of our hearts have been hanging helplessly with the disappearance of TA, which really makes important relatives insomnia, emotional excitement and suffering!

There are more follow-up injuries: in the case of baby trafficking, some lucky children were found after many years, but their impressions of their biological parents almost completely disappeared, but they gained new fatherly love and maternal love in the buyer's family. Although this new paternal love and maternal love is different from the original paternal love and maternal love, the children are unwilling to accept it at first. But after a long time, children will gradually accept the new living environment and interpersonal network and take root. The biological parents suddenly appeared many years later, abruptly cutting off the established family relationship and interpersonal network relationship, which made the children unacceptable and almost died! While the biological parents feel the ecstasy of their beloved son's recovery, they also have no choice but to taste the bitterness of being forgotten by their children many years ago. The children have new parental roles and emotions in their hearts, which can't be completed for a while! The child is still the child we gave birth to, but it is not the child at the beginning. There is a fracture, discontinuity and inconsistency between it and the memory of the baby in our memory. Children only have some residual memories of us as TA's biological parents (if so, it's still lucky), and more parents and relatives are stationed in their hearts now, which is unforgettable!

Tell me again why this happened:

In my opinion, there are generally two situations when people get lost:

The first situation is caused by people's subjective will, that is, the parties or malicious others deliberately caused it, which is divided into two categories:

First, the parties took the initiative to flee. For example, because of family conflicts and disputes, the parties can't get over it for a while, just leave home without saying hello to anyone, then turn off their mobile phones and cut off contact with family, friends, colleagues and other major social relations people, showing no trace, leaving only anxious family members looking around.

Why is this happening? Generally speaking, it is believed that the client is temporarily unable to get over it because of his poor psychological quality, which can not effectively resolve the negative emotions brought about by various interpersonal conflicts. The deeper reason may be that the client is in an unhealthy interpersonal network and fails to seek useful interpersonal support and help after generating bad cognition such as inferiority and self-blame, so he may be angry and unable to make a stupid move to run away from home.

Second, the parties are forced to run away from home and disappear under the threat and kidnapping of malicious others, such as women and children being abducted and extorted by malicious others, or even being disabled or even killed by malicious others for money and sex.

Why is this happening? There is no doubt that these extreme situations are criminal offences. Apart from the subjective malice of criminal suspects, as individuals, we may not be vigilant enough to pay attention to the personal safety of ourselves and our babies at all times. Are people who get rich too rich and high-profile Or those who are tempted are too exposed and have insufficient understanding of the dangers in society. For example, running is popular among young people now, which was originally a popular fitness method. However, it should be noted that when a person goes out for running in the morning and evening and passes through some secluded places, he may be targeted and countered by people with malicious intentions, and he has to guard against it.

The second situation is caused by non-human subjective will, mainly getting lost, which is common in people with no capacity for behavior, such as infants, mental patients and elderly people with partial or complete loss of cognitive ability.

Why is this happening? Without exception, this situation is that guardians are negligent and fail to fulfill their full guardianship responsibilities, which eventually leads to infants, mental patients and the elderly who have partially or completely lost their cognitive ability losing contact with their guardians, and they can't contact their families, which leads to very dangerous situations.

What if someone gets lost?

If people are lost, the sky will fall!

No matter what happens, the important relatives of the parties are hard to accept and will immediately fall into a dizzy anxiety. Don't panic at this time, we must widely mobilize relatives and friends to participate.

In my opinion, the most important step is to set up a temporary committee composed of three or five rational and prestigious people to discuss major decisions in a unified way and collect feedback on progress. The purpose of this is to prevent the important relatives of the parties (such as parents who have lost their babies) from losing control and making rational decisions and actions. Even call the police, distribute leaflets, sweep the floor blindly, find people online, find people on TV, radio and newspapers, and so on. All need to make quick and rational decisions. Under the unified decision of the Committee, relatives and friends will carry out tracing activities in a planned and organized way to improve the effectiveness of tracing.

There are good people and bad people in this society. Even when seeing other people's relatives lost, there will still be fraudsters who want to take advantage of the fire and provide false clues to blackmail their families. Naturally, we hate such fraudsters, but we must gradually understand the evils of this society through the Committee and make decisions objectively and rationally.

Finally, how to avoid similar incidents as relatives:

After each disappearance, the person in charge of guardianship often blames himself and regrets! However, although we can't find the sheep back, it can provide useful lessons and add peace of mind to other families. I briefly summarized several suggestions:

First, responsible for guardianship.

Behind almost all the lost events, there will always be a period of time, ranging from a few seconds to several minutes. At that time, the party concerned was out of the attention of the guardian, that is to say, it was a moment of negligence that led to regret!

Whenever someone gets lost, relatives certainly need the help of the police, relatives and friends, non-governmental organizations, the internet and so on. However, these measures are ex post facto measures, and it is hard to say whether they are effective or not.

In some trafficking cases, the families of the parties will hate the traffickers and buyers extremely. However, this is the realistic social environment. Naturally, it is necessary to crack down on traffickers and buyers by promoting legislation, and gradually change people's backward concept of child-rearing by popularizing education. However, these are difficult to change in a short time.

Therefore, the most important step must be to make the person with guardianship responsibility never neglect. The most important thing is that guardians must be highly responsible!

Second, technical support.

For parties who do not have full capacity, such as infants and some elderly people, supervisors may consider using some technical means such as positioning watches while taking charge of supervision. In case the children or the elderly are lost, they can find the whereabouts of the parties at the first time.

Third, educational communication.

For infants (especially young children), we should do a good job in safety education, don't trust strangers, don't chat with strangers, don't take food and toys from strangers, don't give love blindly, and don't always leave the guardian's sight, and so on.

For the parties who run away from home for a period of time, their families should be able to detect the signs on weekdays, or they should pay more attention to the communication quality and existing communication problems between their families, instead of waiting for the parties to suddenly run away from home before they panic and regret!

Summarize.

The reason why I wrote this topic today is really emotional! Since my wife got pregnant, I have been worried about the safety of the child. After the birth of the child, I paid special attention to the occurrence of incidents such as the loss of the child, trafficking, etc., and repeatedly told myself that I must take care of the child with my family and do a good job in the custody of the child, and no accidents are allowed. Because I have seen too many unfortunate families, I know that the pain of touching the skin is the most painful and unbearable in the world. Only by being careful, careful and careful can children grow up healthily in a safe and loving environment.

In addition, the news that all kinds of people are missing every day really worries me and causes me to think again and again. Today, through the opportunity of writing and practice, I simply sorted out some personal ideas and sent them out for your reference, hoping to give you some inspiration.

In this transient world, I sincerely wish everyone can love each other and their families are happy!