Tell me about my interesting husband.

My husband is a paunchy man with underdeveloped limbs. Simple and honest, very funny.

One morning, as soon as I opened my eyes, I heard my husband say to Bao Xiao, who is over one year old: Baby, you have been bitten by mosquitoes so much, you should let your father take a bite. What? This cargo is sick again, and he is sleepy at once. Take his son away at once. It's not that I'm nervous, it's that this person's thinking is different from ordinary people.

One day, my husband went to get a haircut and came back very angry. What's going on? Answer: People in barbershops are unreasonable and cheat consumers. I mean, why? This guy said angrily, I saw outside his house that it said wash, cut and blow 30, wash and blow 20, and that haircut was not 10. I cut it and sent it to them 10, and then stopped. I certainly won't give it to them easily if I say that the money is not enough for 20. Bullying me in math or something? I almost spit out an old blood when I heard it. You are great. You are really good at math.

My husband likes noodles (northerners). Every time I go out to eat with him, the goods always tell me secretly: Wife, you should eat more vinegar and put more peppers. Look, our bowl of noodles 10 yuan. Eat more seasoning, will it be profitable? Every time I get a dirty look. Once I went to eat noodles, and it happened that there was not much vinegar in the bottle on the table. After pouring the goods, he climbed into my ear and whispered to me: Wife, look, I made you another bottle of vinegar today. Is it awesome? I think my boss is staring at me. I feel dizzy. Am I blind? I'm leaving, okay? Besides, the boss is so busy, why do you play so much?

My husband is a real jerk and fool. I don't think he has developed limbs or brains. I once went to a place on business and said that the oranges there were particularly delicious, so I asked him to bring some back. I brought it back, and I thought it was good when I came back. I gave him a taste, and he immediately grabbed it from me. Anyway, the last two-thirds went into his stomach.

I bought an album online and colored it. After that, you think it's not bad, so take a photo and send it to him, saying, what about your wife's painting? He will reply to my wife immediately. You're amazing. You can be a painter. I was going to lie to him, but he took it seriously. Send the photos to some of his friends and tell them that he bought them online. What about 300 yuan? Does it look nice? One of his friends said it was beautiful and used it as a head portrait. At first glance, my wife is really amazing. I actually added a group of paintings to sell and hung them up to buy. Come back and tease me, alas! I'm humiliated by you.