As parents, how to prevent children from becoming likable people?

Cheerful personality is fatal to children's growth. As we pay attention to children, we gradually find that children's world has been integrated into our adult world early, and some of our habits and behavioral characteristics are gradually imitated by children. The ingratiating personality is one of the potentially dangerous personalities, which can easily turn into depression. The most terrible thing is that people with ingratiating personality have almost no self. When we realize this problem when our children are young, most of us can prevent them from becoming flattering (key point). I have looked up a lot of information for this matter, and I would like to share my heartfelt wishes with you.

Let's talk about flattering personality first, and distinguish flattering personality: it is generally believed that people with flattering personality have the following five characteristics: 1, afraid to speak their inner thoughts; 2, like to take the initiative to apologize; 3. Will cater to others; 4, do not know how to refuse; 5. There is no principle or bottom line. Pleasant personality is similar to people with high emotional intelligence, but they are essentially different. Don't mix with people with high emotional intelligence. Have your own opinions, but be tolerant of yourself and others. Have principles, can analyze and solve problems dialectically. Be good at controlling your emotions and never belittle yourself easily.

And flattering people will subconsciously tolerate. I care too much about other people's comments and habitually blame myself for other people's mistakes. And try to gain recognition by pleasing others. Afraid of losing what you have, afraid of change. In fact, one of the biggest motives in his subconscious is to expect the object he pleases to give him a corresponding reward for this flattery. Only life is the essence of life.

How to protect children from becoming obsequious personality: 1, don't quarrel in front of children, and give a stable and warm family environment. Infants and young children are most sensitive to their surroundings. As parents, we should provide a warm and stable family environment for our children, instead of the psychological burden and pressure brought by quarreling and fighting. When a child feels the insecurity brought by the family he needs most, a large number of children will try their best to please their parents through their own practices, which also lays the foundation for pleasing personality.

We are the best teachers for children. As parents, children are the best teachers, and children will continue to imitate our growth. If one of the parents has a flattering personality, then the child will either become strong or become a flattering personality. What we should do is to face the things we encounter in our daily life positively and set a good example for our children, instead of blindly avoiding admitting mistakes and feeling sorry for ourselves; 3. Cultivate children's autonomy and independence, and don't force children to do things. Learn to encourage children and guide them to do what they like. Proper appreciation and praise is helpful for children to deal with things faster and more independently, rather than forcing them to make decisions. There is no reason or simply saying something like "Dad, this is for your own good", forcing children to do something. Don't let us force our children to live too tired and have no way to say no;

4. Establish a complete world outlook for children. Let the children know that when we are good enough, even if we can't obey, everyone will admire and respect us from the heart. May every child be self-reliant without inferiority, tolerant without indulgence, and enrich his life.