Humorous funny vegetable jokes

Humorous vegetable jokes

There are many jokes spread on WeChat every day. I wonder if you like to read them? The following are humorous vegetable jokes that I have compiled. I hope they will be useful to everyone. Helps.

Humorous Vegetable Jokes 1

1. Loofah met a cucumber in the vegetable market and asked in confusion: Sister, no one else wears flowers, but you wear them every day. A bright little yellow flower, what does it mean? It’s too old-fashioned.

Cucumber said: If you want to be popular, you have to play with flowers. Do you understand? Let me tell you, my trick is fresh and visible.

2. When Bitter Melon met Eggplant, he asked in surprise: Your skin is so good, how do you take care of it?

Eggplant proudly said: I use a purely natural beauty method, without using any cosmetics. Facts have proved that it saves money and effort, looks good, and is effective in resisting water and sweat.

3. Snake beans and snake met, and the snake said angrily: You actually imitated me and "listed" it. I want to complain that you infringed on my portrait rights.

Snake Doujiao said: You really don’t know what’s good or bad. What’s there to envy about my listing? It’s not like I’m going to die for you.

4. Bamboo chopsticks met bamboo shoots at the dining table. Chopsticks sighed: As an old friend, I really envy you, you are still so young and beautiful.

Bamboo shoots asked in confusion: Old friend? You mean you know me?

Chopsticks said: Yes, you and I were originally from the same family, and we were both from the same family. When we were young, I am as favored as you, but now that I am older, I have become chopsticks.

5. When broccoli met cauliflower, he sighed: Brother, I haven’t seen you for a few years, and my hair is all white.

Caihua said seriously: I’m not worried about you. You wear a cuckold every day and you’re not afraid of other people’s jokes. I’m almost ashamed to death for you. Humorous Vegetable Jokes Chapter 2

1. Question: What fruit does Faye Wong like the most?

Answer: Durian (sometimes, sometimes, I would rather choose to 'stay' and not let go)

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2. Which fruit has the worst eyesight?--Mango.

3. Which fruit has the highest temperature? The answer is pears, because ions are hot

4. One day, the teacher took a group of children to the mountains to pick fruits. She announced: "Children, pick fruits." After finishing the fruits, we washed them together. After washing, all the children went to pick the fruits. Teacher: "Xiaohua, what did you pick?" "I'm washing apples because I picked them. "Teacher: "Where are you, Xiaomei?" Xiaomei: "I'm washing tomatoes because I picked them. "Teacher: "The children are all great! What about you, A Ming?" A Ming: "I'm washing my shoes because I stepped in poop. ”

5. Tomato A: Brother, what’s your name?

Tomato B:…

Tomato A: Brother, what’s your name?

Tomato A: Brother...

Tomato B (looks at it strangely): We are tomatoes, how can we talk...

6. A banana was walking on the road. It was so hot that it peeled off its skin and suddenly slipped...

7. Once upon a time, there was a fat grapefruit. He felt that he had to start losing weight. After a month, he successfully turned into a fat orange.

8. Once upon a time, there was a carambola. He raised a lot of it, and one day the sheepfold broke. A sheep took the opportunity to escape. Everyone asked him to repair the hole quickly, but he said that there was no need to repair the hole after the sheep ran away. After a few days, Carambola found that he had turned into a bayberry.

9. Heibulin said, I am so sour.

Yangmei said, I am even more sour.

Ximei said, can you two be as sour as me? I am so sore. I can’t eat it.

The banana is so sweet, but it’s still rotten.

10. There are four mangoes in the bag. < /p>

One said, I eat three, what about you?

The other said, I eat two more than you, let’s just take five.

The other said. Then he said, OK, let’s eat eight today.

Humorous Vegetable Jokes Part 3

1. I went shopping for vegetables. In front of a vegetable stall, a young man asked the boss, is this melon sweet? The boss glanced at him and said nothing. The boss is greeting others. The young man thought the boss didn't hear him, so he made a louder voice and asked the boss, "Is this melon sweet?" The boss looked contemptuous and said to the young man, "Young man, haven't you seen what bitter melon looks like?"

2. When I was a freshman, I went to the cafeteria to get food at noon. At that time, I didn’t know which of my classmates was careless, but suddenly stretched out his leg and tripped me, and then I stumbled all the way. After walking for a while, I finally knelt down less than one meter away from the window. At this time, the chef in the cafeteria looked at me with confusion, and then said to the others distressedly: "Look, this young man is so hungry that he can't stand up. You all, let him prepare the food first." I just said I want to say: Where is the ground seam?

3. At night, I was lying on the sofa with cucumber slices to rest. My dad was watching TV, and I said: Dad, can you not watch this war? We can’t. Watch something else. My dad looked at me and said: You have cucumber slices on your eyes, can you still see? I said: I have an eye without a patch, but I can see. Then my dad said oh, went to the kitchen and got another slice of cucumber, and put it on my other eye. My biological father, this is definitely my biological father.

4. I went online to buy a pair of shoes that day. I saw a good pair and sent a picture to my husband to ask for his opinion. A few minutes later, my husband replied: "This woman has pretty good facial features and a good figure, but there are too many deliberate marks..." I was furious: "What I showed you were shoes!" A few minutes later, my husband replied: "I would say the same thing when she wears shoes!

5. My brother is from a rural area. It used to cost only one yuan to take the bus home from the city. One time I spent I only had one yuan left, so I was about to take a ride, but an air-conditioned car came! I had the courage to ask: How much does it cost? The answer was: Two yuan, can’t you see it’s an air-conditioned car? It's not cold, turn it off ;