How many children are lost in not knowing the rules.

Love goes hand in hand with rules and is the best mentor for a family.

In the restaurant, at the banquet, before the food is served, the children rush headlong into it, and the adults look at me and I look at you. ...

At this time, an adult said to the child, "slow down, why are you so rude?" Can't you see that your uncles and aunts haven't eaten yet? "

After that, his children will behave themselves. ...

"Never mind, son, let them go and say what they are doing!" Another adult said.

On the other side of the table, his children are playing.

The above events reflect the different attitudes of parents in front of their children's unruly behavior!

Many of our parents always condone their unruly behavior in the name that their children are still young.

I don't know, the younger the child, the more need to strengthen guidance;

The younger the child, if not required and regulated, once he develops bad habits in the future, he will be in endless pain;

Children who have no rules will not only seriously affect others, but also lose to themselves.

We usually emphasize that educating children requires teaching them knowledge, skills and habits. ...

These are the hardware conditions for success, and what is more important for children's future development is software-being a person.

It is essential to learn to be a man and understand the rules. ...

Grow up first, then become a talent! Knowing the rules is the first step for children to grow up, and it is also the basis for learning to be a man.

How terrible is Xiong Haizi without rules?

Children who have no rules can't tell right from wrong in their eyes and can't tell the weight in their hands. Really, anything can happen!

Previously, Hebei traffic police received many reports one after another:

"Someone threw a stone on the highway, and a big hole was thrown out of the window of the truck." "The truck was almost out of control when it was hit by a stone."

After receiving the report, the traffic police immediately sent someone to wait. ...

It turned out that a boy of 14 years old threw stones at the car. He has caused 10 vehicles to be damaged to varying degrees!

After being arrested, when the boy was asked why he smashed the car, he actually replied: "I don't go to school, throwing stones is fun."

Hearing this, the worried truck driver was anxious: "My heart is still pounding! I almost lost my life today. "

Faced with the traffic police's inquiry and the driver's anger, the boy cried for his mother.

In the end, the traffic police negotiated with the boy's family and fined him 1000 yuan because the child was underage and was exempted from criminal punishment. The boy was taken home by his family.

In the face of Xiong Haizi's "run amok", netizens exploded the pot.

Money is a trivial matter, but life is a concern! Fortunately, nothing happened, otherwise the little boy would be a murderer!

14 years old, not too young, why don't you have any safety awareness? ! Family doesn't care? If this continues, it will definitely harm society!

Be sure to teach him a lesson and set rules for him!

Children without rules are really terrible!

These children, I don't know when, will make out-of-line dangerous moves.

Raymond, a Polish writer, once said, "Everything in the world must be in place according to certain rules."

Small enough to dress and eat, treat people; Schools, society and even the whole country will be in chaos if there are no rules.

If a child doesn't understand the rules, acts recklessly, and even regards minors as lucky, lawless and ignores the rules, what awaits them will be self-destruction!

Children who know the "rules" will benefit for life.

Everything has rules, wrote Han Feizi's Relieving Labor.

Rules are both theorems and established habits, and people who don't follow the rules will be rejected by this theorem.

Children who know the "rules" will benefit from this theorem for life.

1. Children with rules are easy to gain trust.

There are rules, not only in respecting elders, listening to parents, and finishing homework seriously, but also in treating people.

Keeping promises is one of them.

"When a word is spoken, it is difficult to catch up." Keeping promise is an important embodiment of obeying the rules.

If you don't even have the most basic rules, how can you keep your word and win people's trust? !

2. Rules make people self-disciplined.

A father, because his child likes to steal money from home often, moved his hand on his child and even threatened to send him to the police station.

In spite of this, the child is still hopeless. In desperation, he had to be sent to the army to let him experience it himself.

As a result, in the army, the children became good. ...

The army's strict routine, strict training tasks and standardized lifestyle made him run into a wall everywhere and had to be good. ...

From then on, he restrained his impetuous breath, hid his once tired heart, and constantly adapted to army life.

Under the influence of "three disciplines and eight attentions", he developed the quality of self-discipline.

At home, parents are very happy with their children's changes.

Barley draws a truth from this story. Rules make people have self-control and become self-disciplined. Self-discipline is freedom!

A person with self-demand is a complete person, and a person without rules can only wander in the same place.

A well-behaved person has a creed in his heart and will not touch his bottom line because of external influence, which is also the guarantee that children will not go astray.

Children who follow the rules will become self-disciplined, which will be the cornerstone of his success and will be used for life!

Education without rules affects children's growth.

There are no "failed" children, only irresponsible parents.

Many of our parents fail to make principles and rules in the process of educating their children.

On a bus in Changsha, a woman asked the boy to grab the handle ring.

After being dissuaded by the driver, the woman said angrily, "It's none of your business" and shouted at the driver, "I hang like this every day because you have a problem and you are sick!"

Later, I had to call the driver to complain. For safety reasons, the driver pulled over.

When watching a movie, Ms. Chen felt that a child around her was too noisy, so she kindly reminded her and moved to the front row.

Soon, the child kicked the back of the chair again and she reminded me again. Unexpectedly, the child's parents were angry:

"I just want to kick you." I kicked him six or seven times on the back of his chair.

After the break, Miss Chen was beaten by the other party, and even the cleaning aunt who came to stop the fight was implicated.

These seemingly trivial things in daily life are actually worrying.

What happens if mother fights with the driver on the bus?

If Ms. Chen still has companions around her, how should the dispute end?

The change of nature is only an instant, but the essence of the matter is the result of parents and children ignoring the rules!

Breaking the routine is no longer a trivial matter, but a far-reaching influence behind it!

What kind of parents and children.

Parents are the starting line for children. It is hard to imagine that parents who are unreasonable and have no sense of rules can teach children who are reasonable and understand rules. !

No rules, no talent.

Yu Zeng said: principles and rules must be based on correct values, otherwise they will be rejected by the public.

"After the principles and rules, we must leave room for children to fly. For birds, the rule is not to cut off the wings, but the direction of flight. "

Parents without principles will educate their children without principles and lose their respect.

Children need principles, and principles give children the soil to grow up. Children who have no principles often run into a wall, lose their sense of security, and then lose their initiative, which seriously affects their future development.

Rules to help children stand on the society.

If children want to stand on their own feet in society and become promising and respected people in the future, parents must do these four things well.

1. Teach children to "respect others"

There was a video on the Internet, which caused a heated discussion.

A 10-year-old boy kept lifting his feet. In just a few seconds, he kicked his mother's five feet. With a roar, he was very excited.

Although the grandmother on the side has been stopping the violent behavior of her grandson, the little boy still goes his own way.

The boy's mother tried to avoid it and showed an embarrassed expression at the same time.

Afterwards, I learned that the cause of this conflict turned out to be that the boy was dissatisfied with his mother's refusal to let him play with his mobile phone, so he kicked his mother so many feet!

When his needs are not met, the boy's first reaction is to solve them by violent means, instead of realizing that he respects his mother and negotiates with her.

Obviously, in the eyes of boys, there is no word "respect for elders".

Don't respect parents, let alone grateful children?

Therefore, the first thing parents should do is to teach their children to respect their parents and others.

Not only elders need to be respected, but parents should also teach their children to respect everyone.

For example, the church "don't make fun of others' shortcomings" and "don't ridicule others' shortcomings at will".

No one is perfect, everyone in the world is not perfect, and there will be such shortcomings. When you laugh at others, you are actually being sarcastic.

If you find other people's shortcomings, you can remind them in a kind way to help them get rid of them.

This is a respect for others and a respect for yourself.

2. Let children "obey the rules"

Actor Hook once taught his children a lesson on "obeying the rules".

In "Mom is Superman", there is such a scene:

Mom and the babies have sat down to prepare for dinner. But Hook's son, Xiaoyuer, was fascinated by his little toys and refused to have a good meal.

Not only did he not eat, but he also asked his mother to assemble the new toy into a "robot" now, immediately.

Hook refused the little fish in one bite, and he was unhappy at once. He immediately rolled up his eyes and saw the overwhelming search and noise. ...

Hook calmed down, and the fish said gently and firmly, "I know you really want to transform the toy and turn it into a robot with weapons, but after dinner, this is the rule and you have to abide by it."

Hu can tell Xiaoyu with practical actions that the agreed rules must not be broken. Only by obeying the rules can we achieve our goals smoothly.

After telling his son a simple sentence, Hook stopped coaxing the crying fish.

After that, the little fish cried for a while, and then ate something, because he knew that his crying could not be exchanged for the robot, and his mother would only satisfy his wish if he obeyed the rules and ate his meal.

At home, parents should "say one thing and do another" to their children and stress principles.

Outside, let children obey social rules: don't run red lights when crossing the road; Line up to buy things; Don't talk loudly in public; Don't spit and litter everywhere. ....

All the rules are made for the convenience of you, me and him in society. And once the rules are made, everyone needs to practice.

Many people are greedy for petty profits, breaking the rules and causing confusion. From not queuing to buying things to bribing and accepting bribes, it is a violation of regulations.

The child is still young and has no clear concept of the rules. Parents should set an example, take the initiative to observe order, respect rules and set a good example for their children.

3. Let the children do their own things and do it by themselves.

In "On Teenagers", a word from Zhuo Ma, a high school girl, made the relatives in the audience mixed:

"Mom, when you were by my side before, I always felt that life was particularly easy.

It was not until one day that I came to a school thousands of miles away from home that I found nothing. "

Like Zhuo Ma's mother, we all want to give all our love to our children, but we didn't expect that too perfect love would hinder their growth.

Children can do nothing. When they are far away from their parents, it is easy to take shortcuts, violate the rules and go astray.

Therefore, parents need to set rules for their children.

Before making this rule, the first thing parents should do is to let go.

Let the children do their own thing. ...

This can not only exercise children's practical ability, but also cultivate children's awareness of self-reliance and independence from others, so that children can solve their own problems when they encounter difficulties, and do not take crooked ways or do things that violate the rules!

4. Parents should set an example by themselves.

Sometimes when we travel, we often meet some young children, running around in the corridor, chasing and fighting, or making noise.

Some parents also let it go without hindrance.

It's also a trip, and it's also with children. The following one is done too well.

On the high-speed rail, a little girl shouted excitedly ...

Then her mother told her, "Have you forgotten what her mother said? If you disturb the uncles and aunts in the car like this, you should keep your voice down in public, so that other uncles and aunts will think the baby is very polite! "

The child lowered his voice under the mother's reminder.

Children are born active and need the correct guidance of their parents.

If children have no sense of rules, parents should tell them at the first time that respecting others and not disturbing others is the best education.

Only when parents set an example can children receive the right signals and strive to be sensible and educated children.

It is the instinct of every parent to love children. It is also a major event in education to set rules for children while loving them.

It is the responsibility of parents to make their children independent. After all, we can't be with our children forever.

Let children learn to obey the rules, take responsibility and cultivate the awareness of rules in order to win a better future.

There is a story in The Analects of Confucius Ji called Training in Court.

One day, Confucius was standing in the yard, and his son Kong Li was walking briskly with his head down.

Confucius stopped him and asked, "Have you ever studied poetry?" Kong Li replied, "No".

Confucius said, "If you don't learn poetry, how can you speak?"

The next day, Kong Li met Confucius standing in the yard again.

Confucius asked, "Have you learned etiquette?" Kong Li replied, "No."

Confucius said, "If you don't learn manners, how can you be a man?"

Ritual is the rule. If you don't follow the rules, you can't be an adult.

As the saying goes: national laws, family rules; Without rules, there would be no Fiona Fang.

There can never be a lack of rules at home.

I have met many parents who regard letting go as waiting for flowers to bloom, and regard connivance and doting as happy education. Finally, it is only the lack of children's awareness of rules, and it is too late to regret it.

Just like the book "Family Education" wrote: "Freedom with rules is lively, and freedom without rules is unbridled."

If the family has no rules, the children have no principles; Parents who don't know how to set rules can't raise grateful children.

Chatting with guests during the Chinese New Year unconsciously talked about children's education.

A friend said that he had no dignity at home, and his children were not afraid of him at all. He also said that he was always addicted to games and could reply after a few words. To this end, he expressed great distress.

Another friend feels the same way. She said that children don't like to communicate with themselves, and she is very rebellious. She refused to listen to anything, but lamented that the child was spoiled as a child.

Why is this happening? There are two reasons: first, there are no rules; Second, parents are not enough to convince their children.

When children are ignorant, there is no concept of right and wrong, only likes and dislikes. If his parents are obedient, he will only take it for granted.

Over time, children who grow up like this will suffer if they don't listen to bad advice.

There is a saying in "Yan Family Instructions": "The strictness of father and son cannot be broken; Love with flesh and blood, not Jane. If you don't accept filial piety, you will be slow. "

Parents who indulge their children too much will make them lose their bottom line; If it is too strict, it will make children rebellious.

A home should have both warmth and rules. "Love children" and "establish rules" are indispensable.

Professor Li Meijin once said that before a child is six years old, he should be given good rules to let him know what he can and cannot do.

It is far more effective and important to establish rules from an early age, guide and educate children in an appropriate way, and let them know how to love themselves and their families, than to be rude and disciplined when children grow up.

I once saw a story in a children's picture book:

In the story, mother did very well. She took pains to assure the children that "I love you forever".

At the same time, don't forget to emphasize: son, you are responsible for your actions and you have to bear the consequences of your actions.

When children make mistakes, parents can't help them escape. On the contrary, they should let children learn to take responsibility and let them have the honesty and courage to face mistakes.

In the final analysis, whether you want children to become dragons or women to become phoenixes, the premise is to let children become "people" first.

This is the meaning of "making rules".

At this point, let's talk about what "rules" are. Take the most common things in our lives, such as eating.

If parents give their children rules: when you must eat, how much you must eat and when to finish eating.

In fact, this is not a rule, but at most it is mandatory.

The rule should be this: it is the same for the whole family to decide when to eat and when to finish eating. No one can eat or eat less during this time, but after this time, no one has any snacks to eat.

In other words, rules are not requirements imposed on an object, but principles that everyone must abide by.

If we only make rules unilaterally, it is an infringement on the freedom of others.

When parents make rules, if they don't count themselves in, they even make rules for their children and break them themselves, which will only make children feel disgusted.

Therefore, don't set a direction rule for your child. All the rules in the family should be directed at two or more people.

Otherwise, it is not a rule, but an order.

We are familiar with a saying of Emperor Taizong: "A husband takes copper as a mirror, straightens his clothes, takes the ancient as a mirror, observes its rise and fall, and takes people as a mirror to know its gains and losses."

The rules we make are not a mirror.

As the saying goes: the heart is like a ruler, the will is like a ruler, calm as water, and honest as a rope.

With rules, people will have the bottom line and principles of being a man.

The rules set in the family will exert a subtle influence on everyone in the family.

Parents should also use rules to be strict with themselves, especially the way they treat their children, and can't do whatever they want.

For example, you must keep your promise to your children. This is not only a matter of prestige, but also a good example for children to follow the rules.

Parents' every move will be deeply imprinted in their children's hearts; The family environment will eventually be reflected in the child's long life in the future.

It is a panacea for cultivating excellent children for parents to change their ideas, grow up with their children and create a good family environment.

There has been a voice circulating on the Internet: The biggest sorrow of China's parents is that they have given their all, but failed to cultivate a grateful child.

Parents' love for their children is both natural and instinctive. Even the vast majority of parents in China live for their children all their lives.

When children are young, they are afraid of falling, touching, wearing less clothes and not eating delicious food. ...

When children grow up, help them fill in their volunteers, find a job and find a house ... I can't wait to help them make decisions and pave the way for everything.

Educator makarenko said: "Everything is for children, everything is sacrificed for him, even his own happiness. This is the most terrible gift parents give their children. "

Children who grow up under the doting of their parents grow up only physically, not psychologically.

Do you still remember Wang Jiajing, an international student in the case of "killing her mother at the airport"?

After studying in Japan for five years, Wang Jiajing's mother provided all the food, clothing, housing and transportation, and he always spent a lot of money. He often asked his friends to go to some high-end places to spend money, and every time they spent more than 10 thousand yuan.

Mother's income is only 7000 yuan per month, but she still pays everything. As soon as her son reached out, she raised money everywhere and sent it to her son.

It was not until she borrowed money everywhere and couldn't get any more money that Wang Jiajing understood her mother's difficulties. Instead, she escalated her dissatisfaction into resentment and pointed the knife at her mother.

Parents' endless and unconditional efforts can only raise parasitic giant babies, and there is no intention of repaying gratitude at all.

A child who doesn't know how to be grateful, even if his parents pay more, is only the norm in his eyes. Once this normal state is broken, the resentment in his heart will devour him.

Many parents can't wait to give their children the best things in the world, but in fact, the best things often don't need to be found deliberately, because they are around.

It was high-quality company, firm eyes and deep love.

The so-called "self-cultivation and then family, family and then governing the country." It is better to enrich children spiritually than to satisfy them materially.

Establishing rules is the beginning of self-cultivation; A well-behaved family can be called "home together".

There is a wonderful metaphor: raising a child is like flying a kite. It needs to fly high and keep flying.

The rule is that line. Children can go to the vast world by themselves, and the meaning of the rules is to keep him true to his heart and not lose his way in the complicated society.

As for how to make rules, please remember these three points:

The first is "internal and external consistency".

For example, spitting is not allowed at home, nor is it allowed outside.

Not today, tomorrow, one at home, one outside.

This will only make children confused and confused.

Secondly, it is "the whole family is consistent."

The biggest fear of making rules is the inconsistency between family members.

For example, you just made a rule that you can only eat one chocolate a week, and it is enough for the old people at home to turn around and buy a bunch for their children.

Such a rule is untenable.

Finally, it is "consistent attitude."

Parents should be firm before and after making rules, and cannot change them overnight.

Let children realize that unreasonable demands can't be met.

In this way, children will not feel confused, understand the boundaries of rules, and truly establish a sense of rules.

The purpose of rules is not imprisonment, not restriction, but education.

It is not only children but also parents who need to obey the rules. Parents set an example by example, and their words and deeds are better than any admonition.

The purpose of a well-behaved family is not to cultivate an obedient puppet, but to cultivate a child with independent personality and excellent moral character.

China has been a country of etiquette since ancient times, and has its own exquisite etiquette and statutes.

Respect teachers and elders:

Hold a ceremony:

The established fastidiousness and taboos in these lives are the rules handed down by our ancestors and deeply cultivated in our bones.

A well-behaved family, with harmonious husband and wife, orderly young and old, close father and son, and self-righteous family style.

On the other hand, a family that ignores rules can't raise children by rules, let alone be grateful.

As the book Rules and Love says:

Love goes hand in hand with rules and is the best mentor for a family.

References:

The grief and indignation of Jinan Daily's "overseas students killed their mother at the airport"