If you have conflicts after living with your father-in-law, will your husband help you? If your husband doesn't help you, will you hold a grudge against him?

When my father-in-law didn’t come to live with us before, my relationship with my husband was very close, and I felt very happy.

My husband works away from home all year round and rarely comes home. I live with my 9-year-old daughter. Although I am missing my husband’s company, we have not become estranged because we spend less time together and stay apart more often. We have always been very happy and video chat every night.

Until last year, my father-in-law fell ill and was admitted to the hospital, and my husband rushed back from other places. My husband and I took turns waiting in the hospital for seven days, and her daughter came to visit twice.

I have carried urine to my father-in-law. To be honest, I didn't do any of this when my mother was hospitalized.

My husband and I took my father-in-law back from the hospital, but his daughter did not show up.

After my father-in-law was discharged from the hospital, my husband went out of town, and my father-in-law, my daughter, and I were at home.

After returning home from the hospital for the first time

I cooked three meals a day. I didn't really cook in the past.

My father-in-law had a prostate problem. When he first came to live with me, he told me to buy medicine for him. I asked him to do it by himself, but he said he was dizzy and couldn't go out. In fact, it was just because he found that the medicine was too expensive.

When he gets there late, he will call my husband and tell me that I didn’t buy him any medicine.

To be honest, I am quite embarrassed because now I need to prescribe via video when buying medicine. During this period, I called my husband, but he just listened and didn't speak.

Within a few days, my father-in-law told me that he was not doing well here or there, and asked me to buy medicine for him. I was very angry because her own daughter lived less than a stop away from us.

Maybe my anger comes from the fact that my husband graduated from junior high school and went to work, and my father-in-law came to help others and took care of other people's two children. Finally, my second wife passed away and I had no place to go, so I returned to my hometown to live. Now the only reason for getting sick is that we take care of you.

? Three meals a day are served to the table. Even if the father-in-law is sitting on the sofa playing with his mobile phone, he will not come to the table to eat unless you call him. One time I forgot to take the chopsticks, and he couldn't move even while sitting there, saying he didn't have chopsticks.

? What makes me most angry is that every time he puts it on the table, he starts eating it himself, regardless of whether my daughter and I are here.

? I remember my mother brought me steamed buns, pancakes, and delicious food. Whenever my father-in-law served them to the table, he would always pick them first and eat them. Several times, there was only the last one left, so I didn’t think of giving it first. The child ate without asking, he just ate it himself.

He once told my husband that it would be silly not to eat the good ones.

Later, he recovered well and often went downstairs to hang out.

I usually make breakfast at 8:30 after I send my kids to school. Many times when I come back, he tells me that he has eaten the leftovers and asks me to make some for myself.

My father-in-law got up at 6 o'clock in the morning, but he was always looking at his mobile phone at home and never did anything. Even if you ask him to clean his room, he will have many excuses.

But houses in cities are different from those in rural areas. They will get smelly over time.

Hospitalization for the second time

Just one month after being discharged, I fell ill again. It was around 10 o'clock in the evening, and he called my husband and told me that he might need to be hospitalized again. Let my husband tell his sister (father-in-law’s daughter) too.

My husband called me and I said, "Don't worry, work is important. If you can't ask for leave, you don't have to come back. I'm here."

My husband was very embarrassed. I don’t know how to tell her sister. I just tell my husband and let me do it.

After hanging up the phone, I was very angry and asked my father-in-law: "Why didn't you tell me when I was at home? You asked my husband to convey it to me." In fact, he was on the phone in the living room and the sound was so loud, that was intentional Let me hear it.

I asked: "You gave birth to your daughter, why didn't you call your daughter and ask your son to beat her? What does your daughter think, what does her husband think? What do your parents-in-law think? Are you thinking about us? I don’t want to spend money, so I called her.”

“You have given birth to your daughter, no matter what, you are still kind to her.” As I said this, I remembered that my father-in-law asked me to call her. When my daughter went back to her hometown to pick her up, I exploded.

He did not show any weakness. He treated himself as an elder and quarreled with me.

I still sent a message to her biological daughter in the evening.

The next day, I sent my father-in-law to the hospital with his daughter.

Next, I told his daughter that the doctor said she needed to be escorted, and she would stay with me during the day and at night. I suppressed the pain in my heart and stayed with my father-in-law for seven days.

We paid for the two hospitalizations. His daughter did not spend a penny, and of course she had no intention of paying. I didn't think about giving up, but every time I didn't take the initiative to take care of the elderly, it made me angry.

After being discharged from the hospital for the second time

Since my emotions were not vented in the first month, after being discharged from the hospital for the second time, my child just went on summer vacation. I don't have to get up early in the morning.

I also started cooking much later, and eating became two meals. My father-in-law had a big fight with me. He asked me, children, have you eaten in the morning? I said no.

Isn’t this a direct and blatant attempt to doubt my character? Only when you have ugly thoughts can you think of others the same way.

He got angry and said: "If you don't eat, others won't eat?" I said: "You have to cook it yourself!"

My father-in-law said: "I want you to do it. What, aren’t you just here to serve me?”

I replied directly: “I’m not your wife, so why don’t I go to your wife?”

He then said: “All day long. I didn’t come back until midnight, how long does it take to go there?”

I was so angry.

Once he called my husband directly: "It's already 12 o'clock at noon, I'm almost starving to death, and I still can't cook." My husband didn't say anything.

My husband called me and I had a fight with him. Because in my opinion, no woman marries a man just to serve his family. My parents raised me like a princess at home, and I have never suffered this kind of injustice.

I burst into tears, hung up the phone, and cried for a long time.

One time, my father-in-law called my husband when he went out to tell me that there were no steamed buns at home. My husband called me directly to ask, and I directly video-chatted him.

Didn’t my father-in-law just want to tell his son how I abused him? In fact, he had no money himself and wanted to ask for money for his son, so he made up this excuse.

My husband is staying home for a few days.

He eats at home and buys his favorite food outside. When my husband came home, he complained that he had to eat steamed buns all day long.

My daughter took out the big chicken drumsticks, big sausages, and fruits under his bed.

If you look at the facts, he still dares to tell lies, saying that he only eats steamed buns, and he is not embarrassed at all.

My husband still didn’t say anything after reading it.

Later I stopped cooking for my father-in-law. With the money from my husband, he ate what he had at home and bought his favorite food from outside. Why should I bother myself?

When my husband was at home, his father was by his side. When I told my husband about something my father-in-law had done badly, my husband directly said, "Are you looking for trouble?" I burst into tears.

In private, when I said something bad about his father in front of my husband, my husband didn't say anything. If I talked too much, he would say, "I can't control it, you can figure it out for yourself."

Every time I said that he was like this, I gradually became more and more sad. I started to have stomach problems, couldn't eat, and I had a knot in my foot for some unknown reason. It's been ten months and it still hasn't gone away.

Gradually, my mood became worse and worse, and I often couldn't sleep at night.

But I don’t dare to go to my mother’s place. My mother is not in good health and I don’t want to upset her.

I went out by myself, but had to go home at night, because one time my child called my mother directly.

I don't know why he doesn't speak up every time his father does something wrong.

Every time, I take a neutral attitude and let me fend for myself. Or give me a different reason, what should I do?

It is precisely because of his inaction that we have more and more conflicts. But he never said anything, only silence every time.

It is precisely because of his inaction that I suffer, but all this is caused by myself.

I could have been less kind and considerate of others.

After a year of painful suffering, I know that people cannot be infinitely kind, and your kindness must have some edge.

Some people will take advantage of your kindness to hurt you.

But everything has happened, and the relationship between my husband and I is no longer as close as before. We are more silent, less caring, and less communicating.

I still shed tears when I think about it for so long. Did I do something wrong? How should I deal with my relationship with my father-in-law?

When you have a conflict with your parents-in-law, will your husband help you? When your husband doesn’t help you, do you feel resentment towards him?