What funny sketches are there?

A: (Right) Let me ask you a question?

B: Go ahead.

Do you believe in fate?

B: Life! No, I believe in science.

What does your father do?

B: Yes, stinky beans paid for it.

A: Look, here comes the smell!

What is this? My dad sells it, and stinky beans pay for it. I didn't. I stink!

I tell you, I am a hero. I sell, rotten beans pay, my son is rotten eggs!

B: what logic is this?

A: I don't understand?

I don't understand. Please explain!

A: OK! Just now you said you didn't believe in fate, right?

B: That's right!

A: Then let me ask you, how do you spell "fate"?

B: Who can't write the word "fate"? Everybody knows that. There is a word "person" on it, and there is a word "knock" under the middle word "one". It's over!

A: why do you write this?

What? Why? That's what it says. This is handed down from our ancestors. I said, why don't you change it!

A: I'm afraid you won't know after communication!

B: I definitely don't know that couple!

A: I mean the word "fate" is so expressive!

I said, nothing. Why do you always think about it? What about you? Tao is about life. What's in it? Say wow.

A: Listen, there is a "person" on it, that is, a person.

B: Isn't that nonsense? Two people is two people!

A: The one in the middle stands for birth!

B: Oh! And then there's "knocking" below?

A: The word "knocking" means bowing. Taken together, that is to say: as soon as a person is born, the first person to worship determines his fate.

B: What do you mean by the first person to bow?

A: There is no need to ask. It has been a tradition in China since ancient times for the younger generation to worship their elders. Although it is not like before, it means that it will never change! Elders usually refer to parents. In other words, your parents decide your fate, and you can't change the root of stinky beans! How did I explain it?

Not so good! I have never heard such an explanation. This is ridiculous. Destiny is in your own hands!

What can you master? Did your mother study with you when she gave birth to you?

B: What do you mean my mother and "someone else" gave birth to me? Explain it to me! (B looks at A mercilessly)

Why are you looking at me like that? It seems to have something to do with me. I don't sell, stinky beans pay for land!

I'll kick your ass! (Raise your hand)

A: (dodge) OK! You don't like to hear that your mother gave birth to you with someone else. That's your mother's life.

You are a man. Are you hurt? The more you say it, the more ridiculous it is. Of course, you can't do it alone! But it's not someone else.

A: Who is it?

That man must be my father!

A: I didn't say it wasn't your father. What are you nervous about? This man, nervousness is fake.

B: Well, my father is not fake. I feel like you wish your mother hadn't given birth to you with your father!

A: Yes! Now you are right. I really hope something will happen.

B: Ah-ah-you hope your father is fake! Then why?

A: You listened! I didn't know what happened outside when I was in the womb.

B: That's right. It would be bad if I knew.

A: I was cheated as soon as I was born!

What is this? Being born is a good thing. How can you be fooled?

A: You don't know. My mother gave birth to me. When I saw it, the guy was poor, with a kang, a nine-inch black-and-white TV set and no screen.

B: that's impossible to see!

A: Cover the front with plastic sheets! Just look at it.

B: When you were born, your family was rich and poor!

A: I cried for three days and three nights. I came to this ruined land and regretted it. I can't go back if I want to! !

B: I haven't heard that place can go back! I think you have no ambition, and the dog is not too poor!

A: I know, you don't think your family is poor. I am not! I am not a dog!

Me neither. Don't try to scold me again! I tell you, poor family is not afraid, study hard and try to change your destiny.

A: Good point. When I was at school. You have to get a scolding when you go home, no matter what the school asks you to pay.

B: Oh! That's because the family is too poor to pay the tuition. Take it out on the baby!

A: I see other children have bicycles, and I want to ask my father for one. I said, dad, I'm too far from school. Please sell me a bike, too

What did your father say?

A: My dad said: Buy a fart, only fools ride bicycles. Riding that thing will kill you! Don't you see those cyclists' tired hands planing their pedals!

B: Oh! Your father is really good at making up stories.

I dream of having a bike! Well, if I have a bike to go to school every day, how beautiful it would be to take my photo with me after school!

Ah-ah! How old were you then?

A: Eleven.

B: I knew how to get the correct image when I was 1 1. How promising it is!

A: Nothing. I thought, if it weren't for his own son, if it weren't for my mother having an affair with some rich man. How nice it would be!

What a good son! Your mother didn't choose a date when she gave birth to you!

A: I managed to finish middle school without passing any exams.

B: You are the only one who can pass the exam!

A: I finally stepped into the society and I can earn money myself. I bought a bicycle on my first month's salary.

My childhood dream has come true. I am satisfied this time!

I do have a bike, but when I see everyone else riding motorcycles,

B: I can make money myself. Buy it if you want!

A: Yes, buy it! Bought a new motorcycle within six months!

B: Oh! How beautiful it is to ride a new motorcycle!

Beauty, your head is beautiful!

B: What's the matter?

A: Motorcycles can compete with cars! It makes me angry to watch others driving!

B: Just buy another car!

A: you buy it for me!

Shall I buy you a painting? Who will buy it for me?

Answer: Buy a car if you can!

That's true. The car is a little expensive!

A rich father can buy anything his son wants. My family is poor! Always running behind other people's asses!

B: Society is developing and people are making progress. The gap between rich and poor is inevitable!

A: Development! Development! I get angry when I listen to development!

B: what happened to the development?

A: If it hadn't developed, it would still be a primitive society!

B: Ah! What's good about primitive society? There's nothing. Eat raw meat and live in caves!

A: Eat raw meat and live in caves. What's wrong with that? At least, everyone is equal. The best thing is that both men and women are naked and can see which woman they want. How free! Nowadays, many rich people pursue primitive life and change to a big beauty every day!

B: That's all this guy can do!

Why should I ride a motorcycle and he drive? Why I was born in a poor family, but his father is so rich! I'm starting to hate those rich people! Hate this unequal system!

That depends on you. What kind of system is good?

A: It is up to me. We all have the same fate! No matter rich or poor, everyone has a monthly salary of 1000 yuan.

B: Oh! Not many people?

A: Not many people. Then the thief will naturally disappear. Everyone is the same. There's no need to steal any more! The bad guys are gone! Cops are useless. They are all laid off. The State Council will leave one chairman, and all the others will be dismissed! Farming, farming! It's time to herd the sheep, herd the sheep!

All the officials were fired and started herding sheep. More than one billion people in the country! Chairman, you can't manage the exhaustion! Besides, everyone is only 1000 yuan a month! Who wants to be the chairman? Don't worry!

A: Yes, otherwise. . . . . . Give the chairman an extra hundred?

No one will do anything for the extra 1000 dollars!

A: So, the official can't be dissolved yet?

B: it can't be dissolved! There are so many people in China, if nobody cares, it will be a mess!

A: Good! Listen to your officer and don't dissolve. All the rest are dismissed!

B: say something unpleasant! Others see your daughter-in-law as beautiful, take your daughter-in-law with you when you are not at home! What would you do?

That must be you! I also took your daughter-in-law, so we are even! It's done.

Did I take it? Not me.

Who's that?

B: I don't know!

A: Very simple! Call the police!

B: The police have gone to farm. Who cares?

A: So, the police can't be laid off?

Of course, you can't be fired. The security of a country is a big deal! Without the police, people's safety cannot be guaranteed!

A: Good! The police will not be laid off, okay this time?

B: Think again, if everyone is equal, you will earn 1000 yuan no matter what you do. Who still reads! Who is still working, who is still engaged in research work, who is still desperately participating in the Olympic Games, and who. . .

A: All right, all right. . . . . . I see, it seems that it is really hard to earn as much! In that case, no one will work.

B: Of course not. When the pay is equal, people's enthusiasm is equal!

A: But I get angry at the sight of those rich people!

B: Don't compare yourself with the rich now. Compare with them!

A: Oh! I see. You want me to compete with Qin Huang Hanwu and Tang Zong Song Zubi! None of them has watched TV, played computer or rode a motorcycle!

B: All right then! Emperors of all ages are not as good as you. What are you dissatisfied with?

A: I can't compare with my contemporaries. Compare with people hundreds of years older than me, find out, psychological balance?

B: It's also a way to liberate yourself!

A: Stop it, I'm in a better mood than me! But who can find me seventy-two concubines in these three palaces and six hospitals?

There you go again!

I found it online ~ hehe.