Mr. Iron Flute

Dugu Zhaoming is a friend I met five years ago who is proficient in music. I heard from my friend’s cousin Dugu Zhaoyi that Dugu Zhaoming and she are distant siblings from the same clan. Dugu Zhaoming graduated from the Central Conservatory of Music and taught music at a local university for twenty years. Later, due to some unverifiable sensitive reasons, he left the university and taught piano to children at home, leading a self-sufficient and idle life. Compared with other music fanatics, the biggest difference is that he never talks about music equipment. In fact, he didn't talk much about music appreciation, although he once wrote a thick "Music Appreciation Dictionary". Generally speaking, when faced with music lovers like me, experts will make a lot of fuss about equipment and appreciation issues.

We often meet at the Jianzhen Teahouse on Fenghuangshan Road. He has an alloy iron flute that he always carries with him, but I have never heard him play it. He said it was for self-defense. His words made me laugh for a while. For this reason, I always like to call him Mr. Iron Flute. I once asked him if the iron flute was difficult to play. "It must be said in ancient books that the iron flute is difficult to play, just like my six-hole iron flute. As for the metal Western flute, it is actually easier to play than the bamboo flute. The main difference between them is the timbre, not the difficulty of playing,” he said. Regarding music appreciation, he would at most say, I listened to a piece of music yesterday and it felt good. If you are interested, you can listen to it. Then he sent me the link from WeChat. He feels helpless that almost all listening to music on the Internet requires a fee. He said that money itself is difficult to corrupt, but it can easily corrupt the human soul. He said that those whose souls were corrupted by money would not be able to go to heaven no matter how hard they worked, and could only report to the King of Hell. When he said these words, his voice was quiet but measured, like coming from a radio. And the way he sat there looked like an old radio with a big round speaker.

Music is the breath of a statue or the silence of a picture. Do you prefer the former or the latter? One day he suddenly asked me this.

I thought about it and answered him, I don’t agree with it, I agree that music is the language where language stops.

Do you think music is a language?

That’s what I think.

Since we already have language, why do we need the language of music? he asked.

Because we have a strong desire to express and express too many things, language in the usual sense can solve general problems, but it will be powerless in the face of deeper and more mysterious inner desires.

Do you think music can take over or replace language to express the mystery and depth of the heart?

Yes.

To be honest, I like to talk about music with people who love music but are not proficient in music. He changed the topic and said, I think this can lead to better music experience and understanding. he concluded. For example, what you just said was very enlightening.

Can my words inspire an expert like you? I'm a little embarrassed to say it.

Of course. He said that appreciating music relies on intuition and straightforward enlightenment. If it is combined with other things, it will be further and further away from music. So anyone can have experiences and insights about music appreciation. For example, some musicians will imitate bird calls in their music. What kind of knowledge and expertise do you think is needed to appreciate bird calls? Do you think that you have to know what instrument is imitating what bird is calling in what state in order to appreciate the beauty of music? This is intuition and does not require any knowledge or tools for understanding.

His words reminded me of the first time I saw Dugu Zhaoyi: she was as beautiful as a noble concubine. I have never seen a real imperial concubine before, and I will never see one in the future. But that's the conclusion I came to, and it's never changed. I remember one time Zhaoyi came to see me, and I couldn't help but play "So Far Away" by Mike Hope to her. She asked me why I played this song, and I replied, I think you fit this song very well. She smiled and said, I think you and Maxim's "Merry Christmas Mr. Lawrence" are a perfect match, what do you think? I said I was nothing like Lawrence. She said, even if you ask my cousin Dugu Zhaoming to use music theory to prove that the music you play is a perfect match for me, I will not agree. It was during this meeting that I learned that she had a cousin who was more than ten years older than her and was engaged in music. But it was more than ten years before she introduced us. When I sent her out, I said helplessly that we felt so different about the same piece of music. She walked forward as if she hadn't heard.

When she walked out for almost twenty steps, she suddenly stopped and looked back and said that this difference is allowed because it is inevitable. After saying that, she kept staring at me, her eyes seemed to be asking me: Do you understand? But I didn't seem to understand, so I had no choice but to nod towards her and then giggle.

Today’s tea is good. The advantage of this teahouse is that the tea prices are not high but they are all carefully selected. Dugu Zhaoming said.

Every time we meet, he will say something similar to this sentence. When he says this, it means that we are going home. When I stood up, I would push him a few packs of cigarettes. He always accepted it happily. Sometimes they even pat me on the shoulder and say, as if I came here to meet you just for a few packs of cigarettes.

He doesn't smoke very much, he only smokes when he is listening to music alone. He told me that cigarettes are like props for listening to music. It's just a habit to take two puffs while listening. When the smoke blows out of the mouth and floats in front of the eyes, it creates a feeling that the music is coming from some distant and sacred place. He said that this feeling can enhance a certain mysterious experience, like someone hiding in the smoke and talking to him.

Due to the epidemic, I didn’t see him for the first time until mid-May. During this period, we often kept in touch via WeChat, and sometimes he would send me a photo or short video of listening to music on a whim. In the photos or videos, he is neatly dressed, as if he is going to give a speech at some important gathering. He was sitting on a wooden chair, with a power amplifier placed on the small square table next to him. Two small speakers were placed on both sides of the room directly in front of him. His eyes were open, as if he was catching something, unlike me who likes to listen with my eyes closed.

I found out through WeChat that he believed in Christianity. He said that throughout the Spring Festival and the first month of the year, he was plagued by low-grade fever and cough. He was frightened and tortured. "Natural and man-made disasters have made me weak and alert. I can only seek God's blessing."

I completely understand his approach. Even though he looks tall and thick, and has a beard, his heart is like a clock on the wall, it keeps ringing when the wind blows.

I brought the Big Buddha Longjing tea sent by a friend and asked the waiter to make a cup for each of us. He picked it up and smelled it again and again, took a sip and praised, this is really much better than the so-called West Lake Longjing we can drink.

I just think this tea is good, so I brought it here for you to taste. I said. It's a pity that the friend who gave me Big Buddha Longjing is a stingy man and only sends me half a catty every year.

What does he do?

Work in a newspaper office.

Oh, pen writers, it stands to reason that such people are relatively generous, because they eat a lot of food and are well-informed.

This friend of mine is very special, mainly because of the hardship that caused him and restricted his structure. I said.

In fact, I am not that particular about drinking tea. Compared with those masters who pretend to be magic in tea ceremony, I am just a person who quenches my thirst with tea. He said that this is the same as when I listen to music, it is used to quench my thirst.

We are absolutely in agreement on this issue. I said. His words reminded me again of what he once said about intuition and epiphany.

Drinking tea is like listening to music. Some people will fall into the devil's path. He said that it was probably a kind of alienation, similar to traders who bought caskets for pearls. God would not like these people.

Why doesn’t God like this kind of person?

For example, if we raft across a river, our goal is to reach the other side. But some people are not like this. They are fascinated by the bamboo raft and think it is magical. It actually floats and does not sink. They also find it comfortable to sit on it and dangle around, so they refuse to get down. Do you think, how could God like them?

As we talked casually, the topic naturally turned to music.

I finally understood one thing this time, he said, I know why I always feel like there is an invisible person talking to me every time I listen to music.

Who could that be? Can also become invisible. I asked.

It is God. He said that when I first walked into the Gospel Hall, I felt suddenly alert, as if the answer to a long-standing question was right in front of me, but I didn’t know which question it was or what the answer was. That feeling is amazing. And when I left, I already knew which question and what answer.

He made an exception and lit a cigarette in the teahouse. I suddenly realized that he probably needed to use his so-called props to reveal the answer to the mystery.

He puffed out the smoke gently, staring at the slowly rolling and dissipating smoke, as if trying to capture something.

That look was exactly the same as the WeChat photos and videos he sent me.

It may not be accurate to call it a question or an answer. He said, actually, I understood one thing. He put out his cigarette in the ashtray. Music is the best way for humans to communicate with God, I would say the only way, but I have no definite evidence.

Are you saying that music is a medium and channel for communication between man and God? I asked.

Neither. he said. Music itself is the communication between man and God, but this seems to be only for the author of music. In this regard, music is not a medium or channel. But more often than not, music is appreciated by people like you and me when it is separated from its author. At this time, music is acting as a medium for us to communicate with God. Because God is listening to music with us and understands our appeals, our sorrows, and our joys through the melodies we like to listen to. However, this is only a superficial explanation of the relationship between music and God. The real relationship is that when God is listening to the music we are enjoying, all music listeners will always have only one identity, and that is the confidant. With God, all people are confidants, and there is no distinction between music writers and listeners.

Is it just talking? I asked.

Neither. he said. Music is a dialogue between man and God, a unique form of dialogue. Because God only listens but does not speak, this kind of dialogue and communication is actually just one-sided talk. It can also be a statement, an accusation, a complaint or a nagging. Of course, few people go to God to complain and nag.

God never speaks? I asked again.

Who has ever heard God speak? he asked rhetorically.

On the contrary, history books only record that God answered people’s questions with rumbling thunder. That was obviously God who was angry. I said.

That’s because God doesn’t allow questioning. God does not get angry when communicating with ordinary people. He only listens. Mr. Iron Flute made some gestures, which meant that God was hiding in nothingness and listening. And then he went on to say, I realized that all God’s kindness is is listening to you without saying a word. I think this is the greatest good, this is the greatest secret of music. Don’t just listen. Who has the patience to listen to the endless and endless conversations in the world? So I have always said that music is the highest form of all art forms and the art of art. This is not something I say casually.

Your statement is quite similar to the so-called Dionysian spirit. I wonder if his words were inspired by The Birth of Tragedy.

It may be completely different, or it may be that Nietzsche’s God and my God are not the same thing. he said. You know, for any issue, I strongly advocate self-awareness and self-evidence, and I don’t like to quote scriptures and scriptures to prove issues that I have not yet awakened to. The conclusion I came to is only my understanding and perception of music, without the help of other aspects of thinking. It's a pure musical intuition.

What do you think is the essence of music?

It is human beings who narrate their deepest and most secret experiences, emotions, and thoughts to God. This is something that language cannot do, and it is also something that other art forms such as paintings cannot do. Music is numbers to our eyes, melody to our ears, and to God is the signal wave of our heartbeat. Therefore, God does not like to hear tongues, not only because they are unpleasant to listen to, but also because they do not convey the meaning and cannot make any sense. They are equivalent to a series of useless vibrations in the air.

Although I cannot confirm his words from a rational interpretation, they did shock me. Because there is no other art in life experience that can make people's internal organs move with the rhythm and make people feel happy or sad deep in the soul like when they appreciate music.

Can God understand human speech? I continued to ask.

Of course he can understand, but he doesn't like to hear people speak, because all human speech is tongues to him, and God hates dialects with accents.

Are our Mandarin and English’s Oxford accent also dialects?

100% dialect. He suddenly couldn't help laughing, the kind of laughter that can only come out when you accidentally discover something extremely interesting in the world. He choked a few times and forced his laughter back into his stomach. Then he said a little out of breath, in a sense, the more standard your Mandarin is and the thicker your Oxford accent, the heavier the dialect accent is to God.

His words reminded me of a word and a concept, which is "pure music". In my heart, I have always believed that this concept is inaccurate, or unscientific. In my mind, music is usually divided into instrumental music and vocal music. Music sung by people is vocal music, and music played by musical instruments is instrumental music. Today's so-called "pure music" refers to instrumental music, which obviously does not conform to the scientific classification of music. I spoke my mind.

Dugu Zhaoming said without hesitation, no, no, your view is wrong. Pure music should be borrowed from the term pure literature in the literary world, which refers to the literary form that is the opposite of secular tool literature and vulgar commercial literature. It is this meaning that pure music wants to express and declare to people.

If this is what you understand, why does pure music exclude almost all songs?

Songs must be excluded because God does not like them.

Dugu Zhaoming’s words surprised me. Why doesn’t God like songs? Although most of the songs are popular or even vulgar, there are also some that are elegant. I asked.

God loves to hear pure music. he said.

But who doesn’t like to listen to pure music?

Singing requires the use of language. he said.

Is that all?

He didn't answer my question. I think what he said contained obvious personal emotions and strong emotional overtones. Was he trying to express some kind of dissatisfaction?

I feel that this meeting was a bit unpleasant. When we parted at the door, he said to me, how do you understand Lao Tzu's "five tones are deafening"? I said I didn't think much about it. He said think about it carefully and tell me what you think when we meet next time.

Watching him put on disposable plastic gloves, cover his face with a mask and get into the taxi, I wanted to laugh but couldn't. I thought to myself, this kind of thing will become a topic of conversation among the citizens of our city after a while. If we are lucky, it will also become a joke in Deyun Club. We have always been so optimistic about small people and small things in disasters.

People are locked at home due to the epidemic, and their perception of sunrise and sunset has become dull and blurred. In addition, the spring and summer of this year were basically cloudy and rainy, and it felt like the days passed very quickly, as if it was late autumn after just one sleep.

It was still a rainy day when Dugu Zhaoming invited me to the teahouse. I said why not choose tomorrow? I checked the weather trend and it will be sunny tomorrow. He said that he deliberately chose a rainy day, "because there are fewer people on rainy days." I think I understand why he needs "fewer people."

Today I want to tell you an important decision. Dugu Zhaoming said, I have sold the house here and will pay for it next month.

Where do you live? I asked in surprise.

I want to leave here, he said. I have taken a fancy to a riverside town surrounded by mountains in southern Anhui. It is relatively isolated, but it does not lack anything. I can buy a house with a front yard and a backyard for very little money.

Did you make the decision alone? I asked.

Of course it was decided upon with the family. He then sighed and said, I think I chose to escape. Really, I am afraid of big cities. There is everything here but it is not suitable for me. It is becoming increasingly unsuitable for me. I think it's because it has everything.

In this case, I should congratulate you!

What else can you do. He laughed. What I need is very simple, just peace. I don't want to be worried all day long.

I have felt the void you are leaving here today. This will be an immeasurable loss to me who has lost a good mentor and friend. I spoke my mind in half-joking words.

This must be your intuition, right?

Definitely intuitive.

How did you discover that town?

I have noticed it when I traveled there before. I took the time to go there again at the end of June, and I made a decision as soon as I got back.

Let’s not talk about this anymore. After I settle down, I will invite you over. Maybe you won’t want to leave after you go.

Well, this is a bit sad to say, I said, I wish I could be your neighbor until the end of my life.

Just have this idea, and you won’t be sad. he said.

Mr. Iron Flute, I am actually a person who lacks sincerity in everything I do but certainly lacks perseverance. Do you think I can have a chance to talk to God about my love for music? I said a little discouraged.

There is no other way to talk to God other than music, he said.

I am worried that after you leave, I will drift away from music. I said.

I don’t think you can. You are the kind of person who is not good at finding emotional outlets. I am sure of this. People like you will be lonely. The more people there are, the lonelier you will be, so you can't live without music. He suddenly changed the topic and asked, have you broken up with my cousin Zhaoyi?

We separated a long time ago. I'm a little embarrassed and a little confused.

I had expected this ending, he said. In fact, Zhaoyi is a normal person, but you are abnormal. Do you agree with what I say?

That’s right, it’s true that I’m abnormal. I said.

When did you become interested in music? What I mean is when you really like music and think music is important and irreplaceable. he asked suddenly.

This is hard to explain. There is no clear point in time. In my memory, I probably started to like it intermittently after I became sensible, each time lasting for one or two years, and this time it lasted the longest. I replied that I liked it and was very devoted to it. I clearly remembered a few short stories about my search for music over the years. I think the reason why I searched like this probably means that I can no longer live without music.

Tell me what the story is.

Around the 2000s, I liked to watch the market replay programs on Shanghai TV and Zhejiang TV after the stock market closed. It was not because I was trading stocks, but because of the background music of the rolling market. One day more than ten years later, I suddenly remembered those two pieces of background music and wanted to listen to them, but I didn't know the names of those two pieces of music. In desperation, I searched on the computer and entered the approximate year, TV station, program and other information. To my surprise, I found the music played by Shanghai TV at that time, which was by Gabriel Fowler. "Sicilian Dance". The information came from an answer to a question asked online by another person looking for the piece. In addition to the surprise, what I thought most at the time was that there were people in the world who were looking for this song like me, and there were people who knew the answer. This means that the person who knows the answer is not only a music connoisseur, but also has watched the TV show like me and the person who asked the question. What a magical thing. From this, I thought that loneliness in this world is relative. There is always someone in another place, another time, maybe the same time, thinking or doing the same thing as me.

I don’t think so, Dugu Zhaoming interjected, I think what you said just shows that loneliness is absolute.

What do you think? I looked at him in surprise.

Don’t you feel that the people and things you find with you are not a real existence? They are distant and nihilistic. Apart from making you have some kind of poetic association, they do nothing to help your loneliness problem. In the end, they will only make you more lonely.

I don’t think so, I said.

We can all choose to reserve our opinions. he said. Please continue your story.

Also at the beginning of a certain TV program, I heard a piece of music and thought the melody was great and special. Based on my experience last time, I easily found the name of the piece on the Internet. And the author, it was a piece by Omar Akram. Because of this, I got to know the pianist Omar and listened to all his works that I could collect.

Omar’s work is fantastic. said Mr. Iron Flute.

Every one of his songs is good to listen to. If I had to say my favorite, I would pick his "Angel's Wish", "Lifelong Together", "Shining Star" and "Surrender", and of course "Mysterious Journey". I said.

In fact, I also had a story similar to yours about searching for music. People who really like music may have similar experiences. he said. This is how I understand this search experience. I think this search itself is an effective communication with God. It works because this action is pure, pious and full of passion. So you don’t have to worry about whether you can communicate with God.

Thank you for your explanation. To me, your explanation makes sense and is also a comfort. I said.

Aren’t you finished telling your story? he asked.

I won’t go into some similar ones, so that’s all. I said.

You haven’t said which Omar’s piano piece you found. he said with a smile.

Didn’t I say that?

No.

"Escape from me" is also translated as "Elope with me".

Without you telling me, I would have thought it was one of the favorite songs you just listed. I have to say "Escape With Me" is indeed a beautiful song.

I tried hard to find it just because it sounded good.

Very interesting, don’t you think? He looked at me with a somewhat mysterious look.

Do you mean searching? I replied that it was certainly interesting to search.

No, the meaning of searching has already been mentioned. He said, I'm talking about another one that I just discovered.

I shook my head, a little confused.

Does this song mean that you are finally going to live in seclusion with me in that mountain town I mentioned?

I thought about what he said in my head again before I suddenly realized it.

This should be considered a good sign. I said with a smile.

It should be considered. He said, I naturally hope you can be my neighbor, but you must not work hard for this so-called omen. How to live, where, and in what way, I think it is the same as appreciating music. Follow your inner instincts.

When Dugu Zhaoming and his family left the city, I went to see him off. After selecting thousands of useful items, he entrusted them all to the logistics company. His wife drove his family's old Passat that had run nearly 300,000 kilometers. He couldn't drive and sat in the passenger seat honestly, just like a couple going on a trip.

Other people’s cars say they are burning oil, but why is there no problem with my car? He took off his mask and smiled.

Is it determined by character? I said.

He laughed. I had never seen him laugh so happily.

When the car started, the noise was still a bit loud. I stood by the car window and said to him, last time you asked me to think about "five tones are deafening", I forgot to tell you how I thought about it. .

How do you think? He said, is it possible to hear you give a long speech at this time?

No, just one sentence, and you can be on your way after I say it. I said.

Okay, I'm just waiting for a word from you. he said.

That’s the sound the car made when it started just now. I said.

What? He was startled for a moment, then laughed, waved to me, and said to his wife, let’s go.

The car drove thirty or fifty meters away and suddenly fell back.

I leave this to you, I have no use for it. He handed me the iron flute through the car window.

Thank you. I took over the iron flute and it was not as heavy as I thought.

Then he took off his mask again, leaned half of his body out of the car window and said to me, forget what I said to you, all those words about music, remember, follow your intuition, Just go with your gut. Then he added, "I will come back to see you when there is peace."

I nodded and told him to take off the mask.

Wait until you get to that small town before picking. he said seriously.

I waved to the rear of the car as it sped away. To be honest, my gut feeling is that he won't come back.