Very interesting funny copy

1. Thin people wear everything, fat people wear nothing!

There is gold under a man's knee. I cut off my whole leg and didn't even find a copper coin.

I told my mother my grades, and my mother was so angry that she would hit me. When my brain gets hot, she gives me a high five!

When I was young, I was afraid of being beaten. I knew I was going to be beaten, so I went to the toilet first and rinsed my mouth with toothpaste. Then when my father hit me, I spat and almost scared my father to death.

Dear, you must believe me, I am dizzy even when I take a boat, let alone have two feet on both sides.

6. Xiaohong said to Xiaoming, "You got me pregnant, and you should be responsible!" Xiao Ming exclaimed, "Kissing has nothing to do with having children?" Xiaohong: "Of course! Don't believe you, go back and ask your parents if they are biological! "

7. Today, I sent a message saying, "I'm already very ill", and my friend, a bum, strongly replied, "I'll have a dream if I go to the funeral".

8. Since the appearance of Meitu Xiu Xiu, my waist is not thick, my face is not fat, my dark circles are gone, and my face is not black. Hey, it really deserves my face!

9. The final exam is coming. Xiao Ming sent a message to the class teacher: I will wish you as many points as you wish me! So the head teacher's reply message came: then you must only get 18! I want to be younger!

10. A class is like a Fu Nan battery, with six monitor in each class. Math class is used up, and English class can be used again.

1 1. The ancients were actually quite optimistic. They have a little leisure time and want to know how to live forever. After a busy day, modern people calm down and collapse in bed. There are only four words in their hearts: I don't want to live.

12. I once drove to refuel, added 170 yuan, and then left. After walking for a while, I got off to buy water, found that I didn't get the change, and went back to the gas station to ask for it. Please, my little sister said yes, and I said no. There was a terrible quarrel. Finally, the monitoring found that it was not that the change didn't happen, but that I didn't pay at all.

13. Dreams are still necessary, otherwise drinking with friends is too expensive after middle age, and dreams can also be used as a snack. ...

14. Friendship is actually very simple, that is, thinking about each other when eating delicious food, and then taking pictures and sending them to him.

15. After divorce, we should also follow the process of marriage and flashback the order. Inform relatives and friends, pay back the money, get married in a video car, go downstairs to find my mother-in-law, fire a gun, and finally carry my daughter-in-law up to others ... from beginning to end. ...

16. At the entrance of the cemetery, a man asked, "How much is the paper house?" The stall owner replied: "20 yuan!" "So expensive! Didn't you just spend 15 yuan last year? " "House prices have gone up!"

17. In high school, I told a girl that I was rejected in person, which made many people in the school know and made me embarrassed. The girl felt very guilty and apologized to me on the campus radio.

18. I ate an orange with a scar with my dad today. Very sweet. I asked my father, "Why do the uglier oranges taste better?" Dad said solemnly, "He knows he is ugly, so he will be serious when he grows up, otherwise he will be looked down upon by other oranges!" " "It suddenly occurred to me that ugly people should read more books.

19. Man: "Master, can you change the problem of lust?" Master: "Nothing can't be corrected. Dong Fangbubai had this problem before, but it didn't. "

20. Today, a male colleague and a female colleague quarreled in the office, and they quarreled with each other. Women can't argue with men. As soon as she was in a hurry, she picked up perfume and sprayed it on the man. Say, "I can't argue with you and let your wife make you go!" " "

2 1. Suddenly one day, my girlfriend told me good news that she was pregnant. I was so excited that I punched myself in the mouth to see if I was dreaming. My girlfriend gave me a mouth with the same excitement, telling me that it was not a dream, but it was true, and then married someone else.

22. Go to buy Regan Noodles in the morning, and tell the master to pack more peppers. The master said with a smile: The young man has a bright future. He can eat spicy food and be a master. As soon as he sees your home, you are the master! I hid my reputation with a smile. I hurried home, put it on the bed, and said to my wife, Wife, get up and eat, put down your favorite Chili!

23. Someone sells mimosa on the roadside. I touched it with my finger and found it didn't move. The boss said awkwardly, "Maybe this bark is thicker ..."

24. My three-year-old son sat there watching TV and playing with popular science knowledge: pandas have 16 teeth, sharks have 100 teeth, and people have 32 teeth. The little guy put his hand into his mouth and pulled it once or twice. He opened his eyes wide in surprise and shouted, "Oh, my God, I'm a panda!"