What if it goes bad?

You can say you are bad, because you are still a good person.

You just lack the courage to change the status quo. You are afraid that your "friends" will laugh at you and isolate you.

Actually, I think you should purify your mind first. For example, read more works by masters. Like Ji Xianlin or something.

Maybe you think it's funny, but I've tried. You can learn courage from books that really shock your heart and try to change the status quo.

Then try to tell your family bravely and let them share the burden for you. But only if you can find someone you can trust. I'm not saying that mom and dad can't be trusted, but some mom and dad may not be trusted. Maybe if you tell them this, they will beat you and scold you, so that your unity will be completely degraded. People who don't know themselves are absolutely hopeless!

Finally, I must tell myself that I can't be such a gangster anymore. I want to be an upright person who can reflect the value of life! Try not to smoke and drink when no one is around, change slowly, gradually converge in front of those "friends" and don't do bad things.

In fact, you will feel very annoyed, arguing with them, or fighting, swearing or something, just to cover up your inferiority and vulnerability. You want to be better in your bones, but you just feel powerless to change and even hate yourself. Fighting or something is just to prove that you are not vulnerable. Actually, you really want to cry You are a good boy, aren't you? Try to love yourself, first try to change a little bit, and taste the feeling of being a good boy in others' eyes. Maybe one day you will really fall in love with being a good student!