Tell a funny sentence: if you can't close your eyes in class, can you still hold your face?

1. I have never understood mathematics since I picked up a pen that fell to the ground in the first grade.

Experts say, don't stare at the phone for a long time, so the phone will be dead.

3. Someone asked me why I am a schoolmaster? I said that a senior told me in the past, son, we have no other way out except to study.

Now puppy love is not terrible, what is terrible is that you have lost interest in the opposite sex.

5. I just forgot to bring money when I was eating, and told my boss to make it up next time, but the boss didn't want it! I called 10 in a rage, and finally took all the money for the meal!

6. The tears you shed now are the water that entered your mind when you were in love.

7. A Lamborghini just passed me and splashed all over me. At that time, I swore that when I got rich, I would buy my own raincoat.

8. Behind every successful man, there is a woman who is full and has nothing to do.

9. My son has been talking for a week and a half. Today, he finally spoke. The first sentence turned out to be "dad". Did I teach you?

10. I finally got used to my appearance, got a haircut and changed my ugly method.

1 1. Can you support your face without closing your eyes in class?

12. If I had known this was a world of looking at faces, I would have used the school's money for plastic surgery.

13. The teacher said, students, don't fall in love early. What you say now will be someone else's wife in the future. When I listen, it will be very exciting to lie in the trough and think about other people's wives.

14. Install a mirror at the school stairs to tell students that ugly people should read more!

15. My boyfriend is tall and handsome with a nice voice. He is a head taller than me and is very kind to me. The only bad thing about him is that he likes to play hide-and-seek and hasn't appeared yet.

16. Journey to the West tells us that having a teammate like a pig can make the team go west.

17. Today, I saw a handsome guy in the mall. Even though he is a man, I can't help staring at him. He also showed me that I had the cheek to walk over and saw that the lying trough turned out to be a mirror.

19. I'm degraded and I can't swim until now. You know, before I was born, I was definitely the fastest swimmer.

20. Bus crowding is a comprehensive sport, including Sanda, yoga, judo and balancing various physical fitness events.

2 1. Waiting for the bus at the station, a student said to me with a donation box: Sir, many people have donated money to poor college students. Deeply moved, I silently took the donation box and said, Thank you!

22. Those students who don't do their homework at night and copy their homework in the morning are wrong. I just want to say four words to you: lend it to me after copying.

23. What is the most crowded bus you have ever taken? Just passing by, but I squeezed into the car.

24. I've known you for a long time, and I haven't given you any benefits. How's this? Leave what you want most in the comments and pay for it yourself.

Classics talk about others: If goodbye can't make you red, can you still be red?

1. It's like passing mountains and rivers when traveling, no matter how much you like it, you can't take it away. This is a pity.

You never know how much you can love someone. You don't know how disgusting jealousy is until you watch him fall in love with someone else.

The affection between people is like knitting a sweater. It is carefully constructed and long, and only needs a gentle pull when it is demolished.

If goodbye can't make you blush, can you still blush? Classic talk about bringing pictures that others must comment on.

Although I can understand the desire to learn, classmate, if you take a dress and fold it like this to occupy a seat, dare you ask, are you in the palm of your hand? !

6. From the moment you had the heart to hurt me, I knew that you must have never considered my feelings.

7. After walking for a long time, there is still no hope, so change direction; One thing, after thinking for a long time, is still entangled in my heart, so choose to let go; Some people, together for a long time, feel insincere, so choose to leave; A living method that persists for a long time and still doesn't feel happy, then choose to change.

Let's say: if we can't meet again, can we borrow some money?

1. It's beautiful, but I want to study hard. This is the gap between me and Mingming.

There is no fate between you and me. It depends on my face value.

3. When you get married in the future, and it's not me, I'll move in next door and be a quiet old king.

When I left my hometown, people in the village never drank well water.

5. Working in a convenience store, my boss told me not to accept counterfeit money when I checked out, otherwise I would deduct 50 yuan from my salary every time I found a counterfeit money. I took my boss's words to heart and changed all the hundred-dollar bills in the counter into counterfeit ones that night.

6. I'm so afraid of being blown into others' arms by the typhoon. After all, people like me will definitely not quit.

7. I seriously doubt that Yue Lao knitted a sweater with my red rope.

8. I often look at you on the bus, and you often look at me. I fell in love with you at first sight, but you clung to your wallet.

9. I will be a senior soon, but unfortunately I can't learn and I won't grow up.

10. I tried to look out of the window like a Korean heroine by the bus, and the bad road conditions made me have a concussion.

1 1. In fact, every time I lose my temper with you, I especially regret not hitting you.

12. Halfway through the holiday, I have traveled all over the country with my friends.

13. After buying vegetables, the girl was stopped, but she didn't give money. After paying the money, she was stopped, but she didn't get the change. After finding the money, she was stopped, but she didn't take the food. . .

14. The one that warms a girl is called a warm man, and the one that warms many girls is called a hot dog.

15. A BMW driver and a Mercedes driver said that this oil price is still too cheap. If only it rose to more than 70 liters, then drivers of broken cars would not be able to use oil! We wouldn't have to wait in line. At this moment, I heard a Rolls-Royce driver say, Dude, you're right. If only it rose to 700 liters! So people who drive Mercedes-Benz and BMW can't afford it. I don't have to line up! I finally couldn't help it, if only it rose to 7000 a liter! In this way, it will be much smoother for me to ride an electric car on the road, which is awesome.

16. There are many unexpected things in life. For example, do you think I should give an example?

17. What were you thinking when you were insomnia? Want to sleep.

18. I will find a boyfriend with your surname, have a son and call him by your name. If you can't be husband and wife, you can be my son

19. If I can't turn red after seeing you again, can I borrow some money?

20. My mother accused me: You are so lazy that you haven't washed your dirty clothes for days! I argued that there was too much homework to wash. Come on, I don't know you yet? My mother said categorically that when I was pregnant with you, other children kicked my mother. You never kicked, and you were born lazy.

2 1. I looked good when I was fat, but I lost weight.

22. The saddest thing is that your score is the ranking of Xueba, and your ranking is the ranking of Xueba.

23. Effect of contraception: If you don't succeed, you will become an adult.

24. What do you often take to school? A heart ready for vacation at any time.

25. Urgent notice: shocked! That's terrible! Never drink boiled tap water directly! ! ! Hundreds of experts at home and abroad and tens of millions of clinical joint experiments have proved that tap water boiled in large iron pots, electric kettles and water dispensers must not be directly drunk because it is very hot.

26. Whoever loves you again in the future will get a slap in the face. If he doesn't fight back, it proves that he really loves you.

27. After the exam, the whole person will be in the same state as when Gee was a girl: back, back, back.

On the first day of school, there will always be a bunch of people dressed as blind date.

29. Attention, everyone: There may be organizations selling human organs recently! ! Just now a woman turned around and asked me if you were shameless.

30.do you have a girlfriend? Not yet. What are you looking for? Just find someone who can have a crush on me! You ask too much! Hold your eyes tightly in the wind, don't blink hard.

1, the tears after turning should not end like this, because we will find our own way.

2, all the quicksand of memory, those lost years, washed away my dust and sand.

At the moment we met, I stood in front of you, just a stranger.

4. I heard a name and remembered some songs, but I didn't recognize the previous melody. I used to listen to justonelastdance, but I feel good. Now, I have experienced it and I am deeply saddened. Whose face has been waiting for a thousand years, who has sunk in the search, I have exhausted all my sadness, but you don't understand my loneliness. Even if loneliness becomes ruins, you still can't swim through my lonely soul!

The smoky face gradually blurred the vision. Once so sweet, now it is like a dumb old record, full of sadness, unable to sing a beautiful rhythm, unable to play a lingering thought and convey a dreamy wish.

6. Fate once made us happy, but after happiness, it was eternal darkness.

7. I have never been so persistent now. I don't need promises or vows. I just want to cherish it, that's all.

8. Those memories that will flash will eventually flood into my heart. Suddenly, a scene that was about to get wet was covered up by inner strength.

9, indifference put an end to missing, cut off the string of Yuanyang, and the fragrance dispersed in the disappearance of Yuanyang's soul. Twilight is full of endless bitterness. Worrying about dyeing hair, white hair covering the years, missing is like a dream, coming and going without a trace.

10, smile, half a city of smoke and sand will never forget the injuries left by years. Find another Iraqi: How can I hold your hand and not want to be my bride? Falling behind the roaring maple leaves, the coolness of my heart is finally rendered into the world of mortals:

1 1, the residual flowers are surging, and my heart is like a knife. Try to listen to your experience with a smile, only to find that the pain has occupied the whole world, and you still owe me the ending of a story crushed by you. In retrospect, everything is like a dream, seemingly seamless, but it can't go away.

12, that sadness stays in my heart, no matter how to fill it, it will leave traces of pain.

13, sad countercurrent, who am I desperate for?

14, the quieter the wind, the deeper the night, the cold window of abortion, who will fall asleep with sorrow. Float on the curtain, under the candlelight, thinking about whose past, sad about what is left, but leaving behind the door melancholy.

15, the night is over, people are drunk, and the moon is leaning against the window. Can't tell whether it's lack of oxygen or temperature? Tears crossed the ocean of missing and swept away the temperature of love. Outside the window, the cold moonlight climbed up the branch, lazily encroached on the whole branch, paled the cactus on the windowsill, and the bleached thoughts gradually withered. In the night wind, I counted the injuries in my memory and lost those I used to have.

16, Confucius recalled: After remembering, it hurts.

17, it's not yesterday, it's still the same. You didn't put on the clothes in your hand at last, and the tears in the corner of your eyes fell to the ground, and your heart was broken. It's not that I'm too sad to expect happiness, but I don't believe that such a beautiful long-cherished wish will come so easily, so the sooner I lose it. Happiness at the fingertips is like a soap cannon on the horizon. We can't be too greedy, so we can't appreciate it.

18. In the old days, the red face was desolate and the rouge was drunk and lonely.

19, still can't help it. It, with the mark of sadness and noise spreading all over the city, has made my world a water park, teetering and thriving. The distant neon has only a vague halo in my blurred eyes, and my eyelashes finally hang down.

20, you will always be the protagonist, because you know how to please, I just watch, sitting in the corner, I am more likely to be silent.

2 1, memory is also priceless, a kind of happiness that can't be bought.

22. I always thought I missed the fleeting time, because I didn't have the courage to penetrate it. After leaving, I found that I was not reluctant, but I couldn't wait for someone.

23. I am sinking for you in this life. After several rounds of reincarnation, will we fall in love again?

24, faint pen and ink, shallow whispers, endless tears, endless grievances, how much bitter and cold, the moonlight is gray, the leaves are like rain, drinking a glass of turbid wine, breaking people's worries, who is crazy and frivolous, this situation at this time.

25, the annual rings flow, time flies, we forget each other.

26, a game, a dream, a broken heart in the dream. Those heavy pains were picked up by me reluctantly, and then my heart slowly languished.

27. I thought love was everything, but it was only after I lost it that I found that everything was not love.

28. Looking back on the years when we lived together, I had no dreams tonight, but I was far away from Changting. The courtyard is deep, and I count my steps alone, looking at the plum blossoms on a cold night, but my tears flow first. How can it be as beautiful as fleeting youth, as beautiful as a beautiful face, and how can you know that spring is coming and going infinitely well?

29. Sacrificing flowers hates this life out of pride, and the residual leaves are unwilling to be negative.

30. What is happiness? Is to hide your sadness and smile at everyone.

3 1, the origin of fate, after waking up, I had a dream, but I had no regrets. I used a switch to look back at you, and I am willing to sink into the mire of love in my life. You are at the end of the world, and I want to go to the cape.

32. Despair is the most perfect expectation, and expectation is the longest despair.

33. Love has always been a thing. How can you know love if you never leave, never hurt, never leave, never leave, never leave, never leave, never leave? It turns out that love is actually drinking arsenic with a smile. The past is a dream frozen in memory, and you are my only memory. Count the fallen leaves in front of the door; Listen, the rain outside the window is the tears of missing. Missing is a kind of sadness, happiness and melancholy, a kind of warmth, pain and surprise.

34. Missing breaks free at night. In order to commemorate love, I only blame time for making the most beautiful mistake.

35. The love you gave me makes me breathe smoothly. I can only live on the only oxygen. Now, because of lack of oxygen at the end of the season, I feel very painful. The happiness we once said together has been abandoned in the distant embrace, smelling the fragrance of love, lying on the grass where love walked, tears annihilated my thoughts and forgot the so-called past I can't forget. ...

36. You should live well without me. This is the only thing you can do for me.

37. When everything disappears, who can understand that only time has slowly melted the fairy tales in memory.

38. In the dead of winter that year, the wind of mood, accompanied by the sound of falling snow, blew this stone. It beats the dull feelings bit by bit, making your eyebrows close to my code word.

39, the call of the distant soul, in order to find you, disappointment has no hope, just simple disappointment.

40. Night is night after all. You can't escape the baptism of loneliness and gloomy sadness. Is it night, lonely and sad, or sad and feel the desolation of night? How can I make it clear? I am just an ordinary person, with complicated feelings, helplessness that I can't give up, constant cutting, rationality, and seems to be more chaotic.

4 1, how much courage I have to face everything that is coming, and how much faith I have to continue my persistence swaying in the wind. Whether that sensitive and fragile heart will be as strong and brave as it was at the beginning.

42. On the day you left, I decided not to shed tears, propped up my eyes in the wind and tried not to blink.

43. The reality is still so cruel, leaving me with the hardest side of life forever. 72 grams of soul is so tired. The empty body has no choice but to smile with tears and nod to accept.

44. If one day, you leave me, I will choose silence, because your happiness is much more important than my retention.