"I'll pick you up first!" This sentence supports the child all day in kindergarten.

Recently, I saw a video that suddenly triggered a tear hole:

A little boy saw his mother who came to pick him up from school. He felt like crying for joy. He tried to go straight over, but the teacher pulled him back. He waited obediently for a while, but his eyes kept staring at his mother, both wronged and happy, trying to hold back his tears.

After the teacher let him go, he pretended to be calm and gradually lost control.

Holding my mother's neck tightly, I cried and did not forget to extend my finger to praise my mother: "You picked me up first ..."

Then, I fell on my mother's shoulder and cried.

It turns out that "mom will pick me up first" is their greatest expectation from the moment their children enter the park!

In children's minds, picking up children at school late = mother doesn't love me.

I asked a circle of friends around me, almost all of whom were asked by children: the first one to pick him up from school.

In a child's mind, why is it so important to pick him up first after school? Tell me about my own personal experience.

When I was in primary school, I had to leave school early because the school had to be disinfected. Although I informed my parents one day in advance, my parents forgot to pick me up from school in advance.

When I arrived at the school gate after school, I was actually panicked when I didn't see my parents at first sight, but I pretended to be calm and searched carefully in the crowd, always feeling that someone would call my name the next second.

When there were only a few students left, I had a hunch that my parents had forgotten about my leaving school early, but I still had some expectations.

When I was left alone with another classmate, I was angry and wronged. I feel that my parents don't value me and don't take my affairs to heart. My biggest fear is to stay alone and no one will pick me up.

When I was alone in the classroom, tears suddenly fell out. I felt abandoned and helpless, as if I were the most neglected and loved child by my parents in the school.

Many parents will find it incredible, but it's not that they don't answer because they are late. Is the child so melodramatic?

In fact, children confirm that they are loved in their interactions and responses with their parents. When a child is in a loving environment, his growth can bring great strength, because he has parents behind him.

Don't take picking up children as a task.

British psychiatrist Bobby John Balbi once put forward a theory-attachment theory.

The special emotional relationship between a baby and its caregiver (usually the mother). It is produced in the process of interaction between babies and their parents, and it is an emotional connection and bond.

This theory explains children's sense of security well. For children, the connection and bond between them and their parents need to be proved by many small things.

It can be when crossing the road, you must hold the hands of your parents;

It can also be when playing, mom and dad must be where they can see when they look up;

You can also find your parents waiting there at a glance when the kindergarten is over.

……

Children's sense of security needs to be given and established by their parents. Parents' "failure" is to personally break their sense of security and let them feel abandoned.

A foreign survey found that children who are often picked up first are often more confident than other children;

On the contrary, those children who are picked up last, especially those who are often picked up last, are often introverted and even inferior.

Many parents regard picking up their children from school as a task, and it doesn't matter if they are late. Anyway, it's safe to have a teacher watching.

However, picking up and dropping off children from school is not a task, but a window to learn about children. The degree of understanding depends on the quality of parents' picking up and dropping off.

We can communicate with our children on the way to pick them up and get to know them through this window, such as:

What interesting things happened to you today?

What interesting games did you play with the children?

Who is your good friend? What are his strengths?

Tell mom something that you think is particularly funny today?

……

Message from parents to children: Every day of life is full of sunshine and happiness, so we should look at life with an optimistic attitude.

Reject these negative questions, such as:

Did you cry today?

Are you full?

Did someone bully you today?

Is the teacher fierce? Did I criticize you?

……

Message from parents to children: Unhappy things always happen in kindergartens, and life in kindergartens makes me unhappy.

For the quality of transportation, the most basic thing is not to let the child be the last child to be transported in kindergarten. Children's happiness is simple. Parents who come a little earlier every day can make their children the happiest children in kindergarten.

Don't ignore these details when picking up the children from school.

Try to take time to answer in person.

Can't answer in advance, communicate in advance.

There is such a real clip in a kindergarten documentary: the little boy's mother promised to pick him up early, but she forgot. The little boy is waiting anxiously in the classroom, which has a front door and a back door. The little boy often turns around for fear that his mother will go the other way. Seeing that all the children around him were taken away, the little boy became more and more disappointed and anxious. He walked around anxiously, couldn't help sobbing, and suddenly collapsed and cried, which made the teachers around him very sad.

The younger the child, the more sensitive and fragile the mind is. If the adults can't pick you up on time, it's best to explain the situation to the children in advance, such as: "I may pick you up later today and play puzzles by myself", "I won't forget you, you will always be my favorite baby", so that the children can be psychologically prepared and worry as little as possible.

I especially understand those parents who work hard to pick up their children early.

Whether you are the first or the last, such a scene will become an unforgettable memory for children.

Such an intimate day will not come back every day.

One day, he will never hold your skirts and cry that you are not going to work;

One day, he will shake off your hand and go to the outside world alone without looking back;

Adults always think that there is only happiness in children's world.

In fact, their world has not only happiness, but also loss, sadness, fear and pain.

Mom, you are the first to pick me up. Perhaps this sentence supports the baby's whole day in kindergarten!

Please don't miss us when our children need us most.

Because in a flash, they grew up.