Speaking style: a necessary conversation skill to learn when interacting with people.

Speaking style: a necessary conversation skill to learn when interacting with people.

When we speak, we should always remind ourselves to leave room for ourselves, so that we can advance and retreat freely. It's like on the battlefield, we can advance, attack, retreat and defend, so that we have a solid rear, we can attack each other, we can retreat, and we can stay in the initiative. Although it may not be invincible, it will not be defeated.

For this, former US President Franklin has a wonderful description:? When I was restraining my words and deeds to make myself more rational, I once had a list with only one word and deed on it. At first, only twelve virtues were listed on that list. Later, a friend told me that I was a little proud, saying that this kind of pride was often shown in conversations, which made people feel that I was overbearing. So, I immediately noticed that this friend gave me this rare advice, and I immediately realized and thought it would affect my development prospects. Then I paid special attention to the list on the table? Modesty? First, pay special attention. What I say, I must try to avoid anything that directly touches or hurts other people's feelings. Even I am forbidden to use all attributives, such as? Are you sure? 、? Are you sure? Wait, but use it? Maybe? 、? I think? To replace. The relationship between speech and career is the relationship between success and failure. If you talk carelessly and argue with others, then you can't get others' sympathy, cooperation, help, support and appreciation. ?

Leave room for yourself when you speak, and pay attention to the following points:

First, don't scold others.

The relationship between friends and colleagues is equal, and you can't be self-righteous and condescending. Overbearing reprimand will hurt each other's self-esteem, and this habit will make you become withdrawn. Human beings have a * * * nature: no one likes to accept orders and reprimands from others. Don't be self-righteous, let others have their own face.

Second, don't do some impolite actions when you speak.

In order to respect each other's conversation, the first thing to do is to keep a dignified conversation posture. Shake your legs, pick your nose, yawn, etc. It's all impolite. In particular, don't stare at other people's eyes, otherwise it will make them feel embarrassed; Don't look down on it, otherwise it will give people a feeling of being above others; Don't look around, or you will make the other person feel that you are absent-minded or have other plans.

Third, don't show off too much.

Bragging, bragging, bragging? People are often weak externally, and their purpose is only to attract everyone's attention and satisfy their vanity. Friends and colleagues get along, and you are talking about credit. If you brag about what you can't do, it will give people a flashy impression. Showing off oneself, showing that you are brilliant and knowledgeable, will make the other party feel embarrassed and is not conducive to communication.

Fourth, don't touch privacy at will.

Everyone has privacy in his heart and territory that he doesn't want to be violated. Modern people attach great importance to privacy. It is your honor for a friend or colleague to tell you his inner secret out of trust. But if you can't keep a secret, it will make them sad and even resentful. Privacy is the most sensitive, exciting and stinging corner in people's hearts, so we should avoid such topics whether in person or behind.

Five, don't push each other to the wall.

When you want to get into the whirlpool of argument, the best way is to put it down and not argue. For example, aggressive arguments can only defeat the people, but not convince them. People who are forced to have nothing to say by your eloquence are often full of complaints. Don't expect to change the other party's existing ideas and prejudices just by verbal arguments. You are aggressive and insist on arguing until the last sentence. Although you can get the self-satisfaction of winning the performance, it is impossible to impress the other side. So, we must insist on dialogue? Seeking common ground while reserving differences? Don't impose your views on others.

6. Don't be too absolute.

Maybe Einstein's? Relativity? Because it is deeply rooted in people's hearts, people like to think relatively when considering problems, and they have a sense of psychological rejection of absolute things. For example, when you say categorically: That's the way it is. ? Therefore, in conversation, although we are absolutely sure about something, we should not be too absolute. Absolute things can easily cause others to find fault. The reality is that if the other party is interested in picking thorns, it can really pick thorns. It is better to be tactful than to give others an excuse to criticize. At the same time, if we don't speak absolutely, we can deal with each other in a wider space.

Seven, the text should be round.

When we talk to others for a certain purpose, we should speak roundly and directly, which will anger each other, even if it is our own fault. To put it mildly, it can leave us some room and achieve the purpose of our conversation calmly.

For example, the waiter in a hotel found that Mrs. He, the tenant, had checked out the bill the night before, but she still stayed in her room today, and this Mrs. He is a good friend of the manager. What should I do? It is impolite to ask Mrs. He when to leave, but if you don't ask, you are afraid that Mrs. He will acquiesce. After some discussion, we decided that a talkative Li Lai would talk to Mrs He. Li * * * knocked on Mrs. He's door and said, Hello! Are you Mrs. He? Yes! Who are you? Mrs. He replied. I'm from the * * * department. You've been here for a few days, and we haven't had time to see you. I'm really sorry. I heard that you were not feeling well the other day. Are you better now? Thank you for your concern. Much better. I heard you checked out yesterday, but you didn't come today. The weather is bad these days. Has the plane been cancelled? What do you think we can do for you? Thank you very much. I checked out last night because my friend is going back today. Don't want to accumulate too much I might as well solve it first. The doctor said that my illness needs to be observed for some time. You're welcome, Mrs. Ho. Let me know if there's anything. Thank you. I'll call you if I need anything. ? We see, Li * * * went to talk to Mrs. He, the purpose is to find out, whether to go or not? If you don't leave, you can know why. But this question is hard to say, and it may offend Mrs. He and the manager. Li * * *' s words are very fruity. He first exchanged a few pleasantries, and then asked Mrs. He what help she needed. She looked very concerned, which made Mrs. He deeply moved and explained the reason unconsciously. Li * * * has excellent speech ability and a lot of room for manoeuvre.

Eight, don't go against common sense.

Everything has its reason for existence, and so does personnel. When you speak, if you go against common sense, you will leave a message for others. Therefore, when you speak, remember not to go too far and go against common sense.

I once heard two salesmen talking about the same commodity on the train. They are selling the same new product: spiral socks. In order to show the breathability of this kind of socks, the first salesman picked up a sock and said, come and help, grab one end of the sock and pull it hard. ? As he spoke, he pulled up a customer, and the toughness of socks was really good. Then he picked up a long needle and paddled it back and forth on the tightly stretched socks. The socks were not damaged and said, Look, this kind of socks is not easy to turn. ? Then he picked up the lighter and shook it briskly under his socks. The flame passed through the socks, and the socks were not damaged. After his introduction, socks were passed from customer to customer. A customer deliberately picked up the needle and scratched a hole in the sock with only one stroke. It turns out that it is not impossible to row along the wrinkles. Another customer wanted a lighter to burn, so the salesman quickly added: I'm not saying that socks can't be burned, I'm just proving that they are breathable. ? At last, everyone understood what was going on. There is nothing to say about the quality of socks, but the atmosphere at that time obviously affected consumer sentiment.

The second salesman also demonstrated while talking, but he noticed the scientific introduction and made a thoughtful introduction. He put it this way: Of course, everything is scientific. How can socks not burn? I just prove that it is breathable, and it is not airtight, even steel will wear out. ? This introduction didn't leave a chance for picky customers. Next, he showed you socks and explained the preferential price of the promotion. The sales effect was obviously better than that of the previous salesman.

9. Speak consistently, be honest and trustworthy.

When talking to others, we should also pay attention to avoiding inconsistencies and keeping consistent. Inconsistency is a taboo. Contradictions are often easily attacked by others, and they are often very powerful attacks, which can make us speechless.

Speak honestly and keep your promise. A customer wants to buy a leather sofa to make his bedroom perfect. The customer went shopping in a big shop with many goods in the city. The salesman happily took him to the sofa department. When the customer saw a sofa that attracted him, he asked the price, and the seller told him. When the customer was surprised that the price of this leather sofa was so low (only half what he expected), the seller assured the customer that it was really a bargain, so it sold well. The customer sat on the sofa and felt very good. He stood up and paced enviously around the sofa. The sofa is really beautiful. Once again, the customer was surprised to find such a cheap leather sofa and decided to buy it.

Later, the customer told the salesman:? I also want a good coffee table in front of the sofa. ? So he went to the coffee table. On the way, the customer saw another sofa, which was very similar to the one just now. He went over, observed it carefully, and then sat down. The customer can't make up his mind which one he likes. He asked the price, and when the salesman told him the price, he was surprised again: this sofa is twice as big as the one he just ordered. The customer asked:? Why is this so expensive? This is completely genuine leather. ? Guest:? Then what material did I order just now? I thought it was leather, too. ? Seller:? All the parts of that sofa that come into contact with people, that is, the top of the cushion, the armrest and the backrest are all made of real leather, but the bottom of the armrest, the bottom of the sofa and the backrest are all made of artificial leather. I assure you, no one will see the difference between them. Artificial leather is as durable and looks as good as genuine leather. ? Guest:? Friend, why didn't you tell me at first that it wasn't all genuine leather? I wanted to talk about it, but then I changed the subject. However, I am not the kind of person who deliberately lies to clients. ? However, in any case, the customer canceled his original order. Moreover, not only did he not buy anything in that store that day, but he never cared about that store again in the next ten years, because he no longer trusted the salespeople and goods there.

From the above example, we can draw a lesson that speaking honestly is not only the best strategy in sales, but also the only strategy. When talking with people, always remember the word "honesty" and speak consistently. When we speak, we should always remind ourselves to leave room for ourselves, so that we can advance and retreat freely. It's like on the battlefield, we can advance, attack, retreat and defend, so that we have a solid rear, we can attack each other, we can retreat, and we can stay in the initiative. Although it may not be invincible, it will not be defeated.

For this, former US President Franklin has a wonderful description:? When I was restraining my words and deeds to make myself more rational, I once had a list with only one word and deed on it. At first, only twelve virtues were listed on that list. Later, a friend told me that I was a little proud, saying that this kind of pride was often shown in conversations, which made people feel that I was overbearing. So, I immediately noticed that this friend gave me this rare advice, and I immediately realized and thought it would affect my development prospects. Then I paid special attention to the list on the table? Modesty? First, pay special attention. What I say, I must try to avoid anything that directly touches or hurts other people's feelings. Even I am forbidden to use all attributives, such as? Are you sure? 、? Are you sure? Wait, but use it? Maybe? 、? I think? To replace. The relationship between speech and career is the relationship between success and failure. If you talk carelessly and argue with others, then you can't get others' sympathy, cooperation, help, support and appreciation. ?

Leave room for yourself when you speak, and pay attention to the following points:

First, don't scold others.

The relationship between friends and colleagues is equal, and you can't be self-righteous and condescending. Overbearing reprimand will hurt each other's self-esteem, and this habit will make you become withdrawn. Human beings have a * * * nature: no one likes to accept orders and reprimands from others. Don't be self-righteous, let others have their own face.

Second, don't do some impolite actions when you speak.

In order to respect each other's conversation, the first thing to do is to keep a dignified conversation posture. Shake your legs, pick your nose, yawn, etc. It's all impolite. In particular, don't stare at other people's eyes, otherwise it will make them feel embarrassed; Don't look down on it, otherwise it will give people a feeling of being above others; Don't look around, or you will make the other person feel that you are absent-minded or have other plans.

Third, don't show off too much.

Bragging, bragging, bragging? People are often weak externally, and their purpose is only to attract everyone's attention and satisfy their vanity. Friends and colleagues get along, and you are talking about credit. If you brag about what you can't do, it will give people a flashy impression. Showing off oneself, showing that you are brilliant and knowledgeable, will make the other party feel embarrassed and is not conducive to communication.

Fourth, don't touch privacy at will.

Everyone has privacy in his heart and territory that he doesn't want to be violated. Modern people attach great importance to privacy. It is your honor for a friend or colleague to tell you his inner secret out of trust. But if you can't keep a secret, it will make them sad and even resentful. Privacy is the most sensitive, exciting and stinging corner in people's hearts, so we should avoid such topics whether in person or behind.

Five, don't push each other to the wall.

When you want to get into the whirlpool of argument, the best way is to put it down and not argue. For example, aggressive arguments can only defeat the people, but not convince them. People who are forced to have nothing to say by your eloquence are often full of complaints. Don't expect to change the other party's existing ideas and prejudices just by verbal arguments. You are aggressive and insist on arguing until the last sentence. Although you can get the self-satisfaction of winning the performance, it is impossible to impress the other side. So, we must insist on dialogue? Seeking common ground while reserving differences? Don't impose your views on others.

6. Don't be too absolute.

Maybe Einstein's? Relativity? Because it is deeply rooted in people's hearts, people like to think relatively when considering problems, and they have a sense of psychological rejection of absolute things. For example, when you say categorically: That's the way it is. ? Therefore, in conversation, although we are absolutely sure about something, we should not be too absolute. Absolute things can easily cause others to find fault. The reality is that if the other party is interested in picking thorns, it can really pick thorns. It is better to be tactful than to give others an excuse to criticize. At the same time, if we don't speak absolutely, we can deal with each other in a wider space.

Seven, the text should be round.

When we talk to others for a certain purpose, we should speak roundly and directly, which will anger each other, even if it is our own fault. To put it mildly, it can leave us some room and achieve the purpose of our conversation calmly.

For example, the waiter in a hotel found that Mrs. He, the tenant, had checked out the bill the night before, but she still stayed in her room today, and this Mrs. He is a good friend of the manager. What should I do? It is impolite to ask Mrs. He when to leave, but if you don't ask, you are afraid that Mrs. He will acquiesce. We discussed it and decided that a talkative Li and Ms. He would talk. Li * * * knocked on Mrs. He's door and said, Hello! Are you Mrs. He? Yes! Who are you? Mrs. He replied. I'm from the * * * department. You've been here for a few days, and we haven't had time to see you. I'm really sorry. I heard that you were not feeling well the other day. Are you better now? Thank you for your concern. Much better. I heard you checked out yesterday, but you didn't come today. The weather is bad these days. Has the plane been cancelled? What do you think we can do for you? Thank you very much. I checked out last night because my friend is going back today. Don't want to accumulate too much I might as well solve it first. The doctor said that my illness needs to be observed for some time. You're welcome, Mrs. Ho. Let me know if there's anything. Thank you. I'll call you if I need anything. ? We see, Li * * * went to talk to Mrs. He, the purpose is to find out, whether to go or not? If you don't leave, you can know why. But this question is hard to say, and it may offend Mrs. He and the manager. Li * * *' s words are very fruity. He first exchanged a few pleasantries, and then asked Mrs. He what help she needed. She looked very concerned, which made Mrs. He deeply moved and explained the reason unconsciously. Li * * * has excellent speech ability and a lot of room for manoeuvre.

Eight, don't go against common sense.

Everything has its reason for existence, and so does personnel. When you speak, if you go against common sense, you will leave a message for others. Therefore, when you speak, remember not to go too far and go against common sense.

I once heard two salesmen talking about the same commodity on the train. They are selling the same new product: spiral socks. In order to show the breathability of this kind of socks, the first salesman picked up a sock and said, come and help, grab one end of the sock and pull it hard. ? As he spoke, he pulled up a customer, and the toughness of socks was really good. Then he picked up a long needle and paddled it back and forth on the tightly stretched socks. The socks were not damaged and said, Look, this kind of socks is not easy to turn. ? Then he picked up the lighter and shook it briskly under his socks. The flame passed through the socks, and the socks were not damaged. After his introduction, socks were passed from customer to customer. A customer deliberately picked up the needle and scratched a hole in the sock with only one stroke. It turns out that it is not impossible to row along the wrinkles. Another customer wanted a lighter to burn, so the salesman quickly added: I'm not saying that socks can't be burned, I'm just proving that they are breathable. ? At last, everyone understood what was going on. There is nothing to say about the quality of socks, but the atmosphere at that time obviously affected consumer sentiment.

The second salesman also demonstrated while talking, but he noticed the scientific introduction and made a thoughtful introduction. He put it this way: Of course, everything is scientific. How can socks not burn? I just prove that it is breathable, and it is not airtight, even steel will wear out. ? This introduction didn't leave a chance for picky customers. Next, he showed you socks and explained the preferential price of the promotion. The sales effect was obviously better than that of the previous salesman.

9. Speak consistently, be honest and trustworthy.

When talking to others, we should also pay attention to avoiding inconsistencies and keeping consistent. Inconsistency is a taboo. Contradictions are often easily attacked by others, and they are often very powerful attacks, which can make us speechless.

Speak honestly and keep your promise. A customer wants to buy a leather sofa to make his bedroom perfect. The customer went shopping in a big shop with many goods in the city. The salesman happily took him to the sofa department. When the customer saw a sofa that attracted him, he asked the price, and the seller told him. When the customer was surprised that the price of this leather sofa was so low (only half what he expected), the seller assured the customer that it was really a bargain, so it sold well. The customer sat on the sofa and felt very good. He stood up and paced enviously around the sofa. The sofa is really beautiful. Once again, the customer was surprised to find such a cheap leather sofa and decided to buy it.

Later, the customer told the salesman:? I also want a good coffee table in front of the sofa. ? So he went to the coffee table. On the way, the customer saw another sofa, which was very similar to the one just now. He went over, observed it carefully, and then sat down. The customer can't make up his mind which one he likes. He asked the price, and when the salesman told him the price, he was surprised again: this sofa is twice as big as the one he just ordered. The customer asked:? Why is this so expensive? This is completely genuine leather. ? Guest:? Then what material did I order just now? I thought it was leather, too. ? Seller:? All the parts of that sofa that come into contact with people, that is, the top of the cushion, the armrest and the backrest are all made of real leather, but the bottom of the armrest, the bottom of the sofa and the backrest are all made of artificial leather. I assure you, no one will see the difference between them. Artificial leather is as durable and looks as good as genuine leather. ? Guest:? Friend, why didn't you tell me at first that it wasn't all genuine leather? I wanted to talk about it, but then I changed the subject. However, I am not the kind of person who deliberately lies to clients. ? However, in any case, the customer canceled his original order. Moreover, not only did he not buy anything in that store that day, but he never cared about that store again in the next ten years, because he no longer trusted the salespeople and goods there.

From the above example, we can draw a lesson that speaking honestly is not only the best strategy in sales, but also the only strategy. When talking with people, always remember the word "honesty" and speak consistently.

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