Funny quotations from adolescence

Youth, like a full stop, dyed our purity red. The following are my funny quotations, please refer to them.

Why is it bulging?

When I was in junior high school, I developed earlier at that time! Wear a short-sleeved coat with a pocket on one side of the chest! The deskmate is a boy. After a long time, ask me what you have in your pocket. Why is it bulging? I am speechless directly.

What a witty cousin.

When my cousin was a freshman, there were only six girls in the class, living in a dormitory. She is the most popular in the dormitory. She always buys supper, breakfast and snacks for her roommates, and also buys a cupcake oven to make cakes. She doesn't eat much by herself. Every time she watches others eat, she just giggles there. Several roommates said that this kind silly girl was the happiest in the future. Until the second year of high school, she became the thinnest girl in the class and then found a boyfriend.

To check the information

High school physical examination is particularly nervous when the color is blind and weak. I recognize its shape, but I don't know what it is. Remember to show the doctor the paper and strokes. The doctor called my class teacher with a straight face and asked him to take me to check my intelligence!

Husband! My computer is not connected.

Once in PHOTOSHOP class, I sent a message to my boyfriend and bravely shouted to the teacher. Husband! My computer is not connected! ? The noisy classroom immediately quieted down. Five seconds later, everyone burst into laughter. The teacher is a little old man in his fifties.

Brother Monkey, Brother Monkey, you're amazing!

There is a teacher named Hou. He accidentally farted in class once. At that time, the whole class was silent, everyone was forbearing and the teacher was embarrassed. At this moment, my roommate's cell phone suddenly rang. Brother Monkey, Brother Monkey, you're amazing! ? . ? Everyone can't hold back, and the teacher is blue in the face! ! !

Scum loves to see and hear things.

Scum loves it. It's so cute. It's so cute.

Don't do anything else secretly.

An exam, the invigilator said to the examinee: If you have something to report to me, don't do anything else secretly, or you will be disqualified. ? Report? A candidate stood up slowly. Invigilator:? What happened? See that examinee asks cautiously only:? Excuse me, can I fart secretly?

Lying is wrong.

A male teacher is having a moral lesson. Male teacher:? Students, lying is wrong. Do you know what lying is? Student:? I see. ? Male teacher:? Ok, now let a classmate give an example. ? A student quickly raised his hand. Male teacher:? Ok, please tell me about it. ? Student:? Teacher, you are so handsome. ? As a result, the student was punished for standing for a class.

poor people

An elementary school text is called "The Poor". The protagonist Sang Na is from a poor family, but he adopts two children from his neighbor's family. The original words are: Sang Na took two children away from the neighbor's house without her husband's consent, and the Chinese aunt said emotionally when talking about this matter. Sang Na took her neighbor's husband home without the children's consent? My friends and I were shocked!

You must be reluctant to give up.

In science class, the teacher said to his classmates, Look, I have a glass of sulfuric acid here. I put a silver coin in it. Do you think it will melt? Xiaoming shouted:? Don't! ? Why? Because if it melts, you won't want to part with it. ? The teacher fainted.

Pig-like roommate

The so-called pig-like roommate, I should have caught a cold and asked him to bring me a box of black and white. As a result, he brought me a pack of Oreos.

Write the 26 English letters five times each.

English class in primary school. The teacher assigned homework to the whole class and asked the students to write 26 English letters five times each. After a while, the teacher found Xiaoming asleep at his desk. The teacher was very angry: Xiao Ming, stand up for me. Why do you sleep in class? Xiao Ming rubbed his eyes: I fell asleep after writing the last letter three times.

I often encounter this situation.

When taking a shower, my roommate said that Pan Ting's shampoo was too slippery, and it slipped to the ground as soon as it was squeezed into my hand. It's so annoying I said that I often encounter this situation. Finally, he said seriously: Where are you from in Pan Ting?

Nobody eats here, right?

A teacher in our school went to the canteen to clean up the leftovers for his dog. Ask uncle cleaning:? Grandpa, is there no one to eat here? Grandpa said: Nobody eats. You eat. ? Eat it.

If you lose, turn off the lights.

Our dormitory is bunk beds, and then the lights will be turned off soon, but everyone is already lying in bed, so we decided to cut paper-cut stones and turn off the lights if we lose! Idiot buddy lost, and then he took off the light bulb under our frightened eyes! ! ! How much you want to get out of bed!

You worry too much.

In military training in colleges and universities, there was a woman in the party team who was very melodramatic and spoke strangely. Let's just do it. I'm tired of her three. On the day of the holiday, she went to the instructor. Instructor, please give me the skills of preventing wolves. People are scared at night. ? The tone is awkward, please make up. Then the instructor gave her a look. Classmate, you worry too much. Laugh instantly!

Please keep it up.

Just after Teacher's Day, the Mid-Autumn Festival will be held, and after the Mid-Autumn Festival, the National Day will be held. Do we spend money on school just for holidays? We get up at six every morning and go to bed at eleven or twelve at night! The school knows about the holiday all day. I can only say: please keep it up! ?

In an instant, the instructor was confused.

During the intermission of military training, the instructor told the boys' platoon that as long as anyone can turn the girls' heads around, you should not squat all day today. A classmate suddenly became evil and picked up the horn: girls in the fifth row, our instructor wants to confess to you! The girls in the whole playground have turned around! The instructor was confused in an instant!

Not folded into tofu

During the military training of freshmen, a lovely girl was scolded and cried by the instructor because the quilt didn't fold into tofu. Later, the instructor also cried, because the lovely girl was wearing a duvet!

self-introduction

On the first day of school, the teacher asked everyone to introduce themselves. I spoke first, briefly summed up my personality and growth process, and looked forward to the future. The teacher was obviously very satisfied with my answer and said excitedly, would you please leave the classroom?

Friends of the enemy

The first and second place in a class are generally enemies, but the first and second place from the bottom are basically friends.

Give the teacher a present.

Friends say that there are some things you can't tell your children, such as giving gifts to your teacher. Once the teacher scolded my friend's child, and the child pointed to the teacher's head and said, right? What? My mother bought the clip on your head for you! ?

Argue with the teacher

When we went to do physics experiments in high school, a classmate didn't know how to quarrel with the teacher. Finally, the physics teacher said loudly: Get out with the least friction.

The teacher asked a classmate to get up and answer the question.

The teacher asked a classmate to get up and answer the question. Do you usually wear sweaters? Classmate:? Not wearing it? Teacher:? You may wear it in the future. . . ? Classmate:? Don't wear it if you don't like it. ? The teacher walked past her and said coldly, you think you don't like it, so you don't have to answer questions without wearing it? ! ?

Teacher, you are still pure.

One is math class, solving quadratic equations, and the teacher lets boys and girls compete! Then ask loudly:? The girls are untied! They didn't untie it! ? The girl said proudly. ? Did the boy want it? We are silent! The teacher then lost his temper:? What's wrong with you guys The girls are untied, and you boys are still staring at each other! ?

What a clever student.

Teacher's Day is coming. What gift are you going to give the class teacher? I wrote him an affectionate love letter anonymously. But didn't you say you hated him the most? Yes, I hate him very much! Do you still write love letters? B: But his wife likes him very much and is always jealous. Do you think the head teacher will have a good life?

Come to the woman, come to the woman!

The boys' dormitory suddenly lost power, and the students shouted: hoo, hoo! Soon, the electricity came. The boys cheered together: come to the woman, come to the woman! The aunt who manages the dormitory came and shouted, Shut up.

Teacher, my deskmate is playing mobile phone.

? Teacher, my deskmate is playing mobile phone! ? Teacher, he is playing with his mobile phone again! ? Teacher:? Huh? I said, this parent comrade, would you please keep quiet at the parent-teacher meeting?

Physics class is very unhappy.

One day, all of us were very unhappy in physics class. When talking about the topic, Lao Shi said loudly: it is the most important link in physics for men and women to do experiments. Everyone was stunned for dozens of seconds, and the whole class was shocked.

Chinese teacher, enough!

Your teacher Zhang didn't come today, so I came to take the place. Next, students turn to page 15 and look at the first question. Party A * * * takes 10 apples, and Party A takes 4 more apples than Party B. Please answer this student. What is the subject and object of this sentence?

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