"Qi Pa Shuo": If you can "customize your child's perfect life with one click", you would be stupid not to choose it!

Qibaishuo has a question in its issue, "Do you want to customize a perfect life for your children?" In the end, the positive side really "wanted" to win, otherwise I would have started to doubt my life.

Let’s look at this question: If you could customize a perfect life for your children with one click, would you want to customize it?

It seems imaginative, but it is extremely real. As parents, we spend our entire lives trying to create the conditions for a perfect life for our children, right?

Otherwise, why would you work so hard and live so hard?

For yourself? Not everyone can just live a life like "Tongtong has a father, what I'm looking for is my own partner (Faye Wong's words)" and live a life with such a completely independent personality.

After ordinary people become parents, they instinctively begin to run for and live for their children.

Although living for others may not seem like something worthy of happiness, it is precisely because of the needs of children and family that life becomes tender and tender.

It is the nature of parents to want to protect their children more than themselves, even at the cost of their lives.

Fu Seoul has a good saying: "What's the use of middle-aged people making money? Isn't it just to lead their children and work hard together."

Yes, this is it The meaning of life!

People are inherently resistant to “customizing children’s perfect lives” because “customization” seems to deprive children of their right to choose.

Yes, no one likes to have their life controlled, but everyone hopes for a perfect life! The reason why a perfect life is perfect is that perfection includes freedom.

Since we are against "customization", let's change the word to "creation".

In reality, the only drawback of the relatively perfect life that parents deliberately create for their children is that when the parents become powerless and can no longer control it, the children may fall from a height and then fall. It's harder, more painful, and even makes up for all the pain that his parents had worked so hard to resist for him at once.

Since this only risk can be avoided, why not choose it?

Avoid taking detours and move towards a perfect life step by step. I am afraid that your children will laugh out loud in their dreams. Of course, you should choose to create it for your children.

Now that we are determined to give our children a perfect life, I think the greatest significance of this mental question is that it will make us think carefully about what kind of life is a perfect life for our children. .

By the way, in the process of educating children, is the perfect life we ??currently imagine and provide to our children really perfect?

What is a perfect life? Jiang Sida is right, if you can find faults in a perfect life casually, it is not a perfect life.

My understanding of a perfect life is basically the same as what Ma Dong said about "a good life". A perfect life is not about shielding all obstacles, but simply: doing what one wants without going beyond the rules.

Not breaking the rules and being easy to explain means staying within the basic human framework of morality, law, public order and conscience (that is, having a sound personality).

What about following your heart’s desires? It is freedom, which means being able to live according to your own wishes at every stage of life.

Be able to try various possibilities in life and experience the feelings you want to experience as much as possible without leaving any regrets.

You can understand the sufferings of the world, but you don’t have to taste the sufferings of the world yourself. Or experience setbacks, but there will definitely be more gains.

"We spend our entire lives getting rid of the expectations of others and finding our true selves." Isn't this the perfect life we ??want to create for our children?

Kill two birds with one stone, for the children: they have no expectations from others, they can live their own lives as they please; for the parents: the children have achieved an ideal life, and the parents are very pleased. It seems like a paradox, but different paths lead to the same destination, and everyone is happy.

The perfection standards at each stage are different. You can choose whatever you want, and it will be perfect.

For example, at the age of seven or younger, for many children, just like Fu Seoul’s son, they can wear shoes worth 35 yuan with the armor and courage pattern on them as they wish, which is a perfect life.

During the period of learning cognition, teenagers encounter education. As Chen Ming said, "the object of education is not the child, but the environment." Provide an environment for sufficient development and allow children to be free and open. No matter what kind of flower it blooms into, parents will applaud it. This is the perfect life at this time.

When you grow up and are in your prime, like Zang Hongfei’s friends, the corals are going extinct. You can go and see them if you want, without having to worry about the rent. This is perfect at this time.

Working, as Ma Dong said, is not without difficulty, but in the end you can often get good results.

This is the perfect life...

There is another point worthy of reflection on this topic. It is what Chen Ming mentioned. When other debaters state their opinions, they inadvertently reflect A question arises: The essence of family education seems to be a replica of the outlook on life.

For example, Fan Tiantian was beaten by his mother when he was a child. When he had children, he also wanted to teach his children by beating them;

Another example is Ke Jie, whose father loved Go as much as his life, and he was deeply influenced by it. He embarked on the path of professional chess player.

For these two examples, I want to say that for the obviously bad reproduction of the former, isn’t it possible to avoid this sense of fate and that is the perfect life that children should have?

For the latter, let nature take its course. The reason why Ke Jie became the world's No. 1 Go player was naturally because he fell in love with Go while learning chess. So getting enlightened in Go earlier than others is a blessing in itself. This kind of re-enactment is not a bad idea.

Finally, is it really useful to talk about some of the setbacks in life?

I chose not to choose the major that my dad asked me to study. When I first graduated, I was so poor that after paying the rent and charging the bus card, I only had 50 cents left in my pocket. My salary was still ten days away, so I had to rely on an overdraft credit card to buy food.

Compared to children in impoverished mountainous areas, this may not be a sad experience, but I don’t want my children to experience such a setback.

If you have a good life and don’t understand such setbacks throughout your life, what’s the problem?

In contrast, I have a college classmate who has never bought any products other than McDonald’s coffee because she thinks they are junk food.

Some people feel that the taste buds are incomplete without junk food, but she is well-proportioned, healthy and has a sunny personality, which makes her popular with everyone.

She wanted to study abroad after graduation, but the only obstacle was that she had not learned English well, so she took a tuition class worth more than 1,000 yuan for six months in a row (tutoring schools are a money grab). In the end, I got my wish and went to the UK to study for graduate school.

She never needs to worry about getting what she wants. Isn’t this kind of perfect life where we can do as we please is what we desperately want to create for our children?

(The picture shows a screenshot of "Qi Pa Shuo")