Talk about the funny proportion of losing weight (a funny joke about losing weight)

First, the three most beautiful words in the world are not "I love you", but "you have lost weight".

Second, every time I swear to lose weight, I just shout it out. If I can't lose this fat, I'll scare them!

Third, the reason for being fat is probably that my thin body can't hold my great personality.

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Fourth, I touched the layers of fat on my stomach and said to my mother in a complaining tone, "Why did you make me so fat?" My mother gave me a look and said, "When I gave birth to you, you were only 7 kg. It's none of my business to be so fat now ... "

5. "Husband, I feel so fat and want to lose weight." "Never lose weight. Now you have to use ugliness and fatness as an excuse. "

I have worked hard, but why can't I lose weight? I can lose weight for eight hours every day except eating!

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What is the pain that can be felt? I just feel so hungry, but I still feel like a lump of meat.

Eight, I don't know when to be blessed. It is said that some people have gained weight, but they pretend not to know.

9. "Cousin, what made you decide to lose weight?" "After getting drunk last time" and "Just getting drunk can make you decide to lose weight?" "When you carried me to bed, I heard you shout: 1, 2, 3, go!"

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Ten, for the tall thing of losing weight, wait until you are full and study it well.

Eleven, originally prepared to thin into a flash of lightning this year, brightening your eyes, but I don't want to actually become a solid wall, blocking your sight.

12. My friend often works in a beauty shop to lose weight. When I was with her that day, she looked at the newly posted price list and said discontentedly to the proprietress, "Last time I came, I was still missing 20 yuan a catty. How did it suddenly rise to a pound in 50 yuan? " The proprietress said, "Pork has risen to 18 yuan a catty. Can I make sense if I don't raise prices here? "

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Thirteen, if you can't control your mouth and lose weight this winter, you will have a very special foreign English name-chubby is not winter.

Fourteen, weeding at noon, long meat is so painful, looking in the mirror in the morning, crying all morning, clothes can not be put on, my heart is very painful, not wearing it, wearing it is more painful, it is most reliable to eat less painlessly!

Fifteen, eating and drinking all day, suddenly gained a lot of weight! Suddenly, I met an old man selling slimming plaster, saying that it was a valid and invalid refund, and I could lose weight 10 kg in 7 days. When I got home, I found that I forgot to ask where I posted it. Open the manual and see three words: "stick it on your mouth."

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Sixteen, how dare I fall, behind me is weighing scale.

Seventeen, although fat people are usually afraid of exposure, they are naked when they weigh themselves, and one or two of them can be less.

Eighteen, many years ago, you said take care, I'm not thin.

The only reason I am fat is that my body is too small to hold all my personality.

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Twenty, a tired day, have a cup of milk tea, don't worry, as long as no one sees it, it will be zero calories.

Twenty-one, don't be fat, or you will be so poor that no one will beg and no one will believe that you are a beggar.

The reason why I eat myself so roundly is to avoid being looked down upon by others.

Twenty-three, when the unit organizes a physical examination, it is weighed in front of everyone. After you weigh it, it dissolves.