Joke Collection Website - Talk about mood - My boyfriend is a humorous person, and I want to learn something funny. Tell me some humorous jokes! It better be funny. Thank you all ...

My boyfriend is a humorous person, and I want to learn something funny. Tell me some humorous jokes! It better be funny. Thank you all ...

1. Grandpa went fishing in Sun San and was in a daze with a fishing rod. When his grandson saw it, he said to his father, Look at your father standing there in a daze, just like a cow B. His father slapped his son in the face and shouted angrily, Your father is a genius! In May, in a dry place, a farmer asked a charlatan when it would rain. After a while, the charlatan handed the farmer a folded piece of paper and said, Because cats don't leak urine, they can't open it until it rains. Soon it rained, and the farmer opened the note and saw that it said-it rained today, and the farmer sighed, which is damn accurate. 3. On the bus in the morning, a man took out his mobile phone from his bag to look at the time, and then said "I am Cao", thinking that he was too late for time. After a closer look, I was holding an air-conditioning remote control in Cao's hand. 4. defecation and urination are good brothers. One day, I was killed by a car while crossing the road. When I urinated, I said, "I really want to shit." One day, a group of small animals were chatting in front of Guan Gong Temple. Suddenly, they smelled a bad smell. The cow said, "I didn't fart, I was eating grass." "The snake said," I won't fart ... "The pig said," People who fart will blush! ! ! ! "Guan Yu rushed out, kicked the pig away and said," I was born to blush! ! ! ! ! ! "6. A person is going to commit suicide because he is heavily in debt. He unscrewed the bottle cap of the poison and gulped it down. As a result, the bottle cap says: Congratulations on winning the grand prize of 1 10,000 ~! 7. Remind you to use network language with caution. I know a child who always says "I'm dizzy" and "I'm going to fall", and then he has cerebral ischemia. Experts suggest that, by contrast, it is safer to change to the traditional saying "I am Cao", but experts also say that it is still not appropriate to be too frequent. 8. The protagonist's son loves to lie. So, the leader bought a polygraph robot. It will be late tomorrow. Father: Where have you been? Son: The library. The robot took a picture. Son: Go to a classmate's house to watch porn. Father: How dare you? I've never seen it in my life. The robot immediately slapped his father. The mother said angrily to her father, you deserve to be so strict with your son. After all, he is your own! Bang! The robot gave its mother another big slap in the face. 9. I've been very tired and stressed at work recently. So I asked a friend I have known for a long time on QQ: "How to decompress". Reply: "Right click to select WinRAR". ! 10, after work, several computers get together to fight the landlord, and the water dispenser can also play. He loses every time, but he still insists on taking part every day. The sofa didn't understand, so she asked the chair, "The water dispenser is lost every day. Why are you still playing so hard? " ? The chairman said, "Are you out of your mind to ask such a question? 1 1, I am really touched-I suddenly feel that 360 is really deep for Tencent. Even to the extent of public opposition, when QQ started, 360 still protected him and scanned pilfer date trojan for him as always. You love someone so much that you hate him that you can't bear to let him get hurt. I hide my face and cry ... honey, I want to be your 360! ! ! 12, once I ate in a restaurant, I could order songs in the lobby. While eating, the host's sweet voice came from the stereo: "This is a song that Teacher Zhang ordered for everyone. This gentleman wishes everyone good luck! The host paused for five seconds and then said, "It's a pity that this song is not you." 13, how long is a minute? It depends on whether you are squatting in the toilet or waiting outside. 14, with four brothers. One day, they went to the park to play. Suddenly I saw something on the ground. Big brother glanced at it and said, "It looks like poop." The second brother squatted down and smelled it and said, "It smells like poop." The third brother poked it with his hand and said, "It feels like poop." The fourth brother poked it with his hand, licked it with his tongue and said, "It tastes like poop." ! ! ~ ~ ~ "15, a man with cancer went to the hospital for surgery, and the doctors who operated on him all wore masks. The man said angrily, "Why do you have to wear a mask for surgery?" The doctor was speechless: "This ... this ... this ... this ... this ... this ... this ... this ... this ... this ... this ... this ... this ... this ... this ... this ... The teacher said helplessly, "Is that okay?" You can't scream, too! Classmate: "Cheep." "17, junior high school, a biology teacher talked about the ecological environment on the African grassland, and no one in the class listened. The teacher was angry and said, "Look at me! How can you know what African wildcats look like if you don't look at me? "