True maternal love is not blindly paying, but knowing how to quit properly.

People often ask whether to have children to carry on the family line or to raise children for old age. In the traditional Chinese culture, parents are the natural benefactors of children. As long as you are alive, you will never end. Unless you can, like Nezha, take out the bones and give them back to your father and cut the meat to your mother. The more old people think that raising children is to prevent old age, the easier it is to suffer and the more bitter it is. Aside from the secular concept, there is actually a very touching answer: pay, appreciate.

Japanese writer Kotaro Isaka once said that it is terrible to think that parents don't have to take exams, and it is not easy to be a parent in a word. Neither can children feel barren in childhood, nor can they feel suffocated in adulthood. I heard a story about a 57-year-old mother whose son was 365,438+0, who just got married and retired. In the past two years, in order to take care of her son conveniently, she moved to her son's community, cooked breakfast for him every morning, cleaned up, and returned to her home after dinner at night. I went to my son's house one morning and found that I couldn't open the door. It turns out that my daughter-in-law changed the door lock. In the evening, my son secretly gave his mother a key without telling her. The next morning, as soon as the mother arrived at her son's door, she heard a quarrel inside. Daughter-in-law says you are spoiled by your mother. Every day when I get home, I just lie on the sofa doing nothing, just reaching out to make a living. You are just a child who hasn't grown up yet. Can't you persuade your mother to dance square dance like other aunts? Don't stare at us like a camera every day

Mom didn't expect her efforts to get this image. When I got home, my mother poured out her grievances to her wife with tears in her eyes. The wife comforted her. Look at your colleagues. They have traveled all over China, and some people have traveled around the world. But you have never been to their place. When my mother got angry, she took her wife to the grass on the dam. In the herdsmen's home, the mother is catching up with the whole process of ewe delivery, and his wife takes this opportunity to persuade her that nomadic people are migrating all year round. If the mother sheep is always reluctant to let go like you, how can the lamb survive? Besides, who wants to marry a sheep that has not been weaned psychologically? The seven-day trip to the grassland finally made my mother figure it out and went straight to the mobile phone shop when she got home. I changed my smartphone, and then I called my son and told him that I wanted to go to his house at night. The son was surprised and said, Mom, don't you have a key? In the evening, the mother and wife went to their son's house together and reported their whereabouts for seven days. The daughter-in-law looked at her mother-in-law's new mobile phone and immediately opened Alipay for her mother-in-law and transferred 3,000 yuan. With the help of the children, my mother has become a person with a smart phone and Alipay. When she left, the mother took out the key symbolizing sovereignty, right to speak and parental authority from her pocket and handed it to her son. Tell his mother that she may not come often in the future, and even if she does, she will call in advance. The son said awkwardly, Mom, what are you doing? Mom is not angry, but learning to quit. My son gave his mother a hug. Mother's eyes suddenly became moist. She knew that farewell began with this hug. Therefore, parents should not regard their children as their only ones. For the sake of children, they don't have their own social contacts and hobbies, and they don't care whether they are happy or not. This kind of education brings nothing to children but pressure and mutual torture. In today's society, the formation of Mamao boy is not caused by children unilaterally, but also by mothers who don't know how to quit. Helping children do laundry, cook and clean is only the love for their sons in the eyes of mothers, which is a kind of shallow love, while real maternal love is actually a proper export.