The most comfortable relationship between people is to maintain the "desire to share"

These days, the topic # Sharing desire is the best preservative for feelings # boarded a hot search, which triggered a hot discussion among netizens.

The blogger exposed her boyfriend's daily thoughts, and the screen was full of her boyfriend's "desire to share".

The message area is full of "envy and hate", and many people spit out that they don't want to say a word in life.

There is also a highly praised comment: "Look at the title and you will know that it has nothing to do with me."

Behind the ridicule, a true truth of our life was revealed:

The "sharing desire" between people is disappearing, and too many people close themselves up and live like islands.

I don't know if I am familiar with it. If we want to live a happy life, what we need to do is to open ourselves up, learn to share and know how to respond.

As the writer Su Qin said:

"All causality is just an interaction."

In addition to lovers, relatives, friends, colleagues and many other social relations are inseparable from the reconciliation of "sharing desire".

The valley echoes with your warm cry; Because of your sincere efforts, there is an echo in your life.

draw

The desire to share is the preservative of feelings.

I have seen such a short film.

In the film, my wife comes home from work every day, and when she enters the door, her eyes are always full.

There are leftovers everywhere on the dining table, piles of dirty bowls in the pool, and children's bottles, toys and diapers are thrown everywhere.

Whenever she tidies up, she is always too tired to say a word.

draw

What about her husband?

As soon as I got home, I got into the sofa and brushed my mobile phone.

That night, the husband kept calling, the child cried into a ball, and the wife was so anxious that she collapsed.

She grabbed her husband's cell phone, slammed it on the ground and shouted, "Divorce!"

Unknown so, her husband, replied, "Are you crazy? Are you sick? "

Finally, there was a big fight and it broke up.

In fact, my husband is communicating with customers by brushing his mobile phone.

In order to get more bonuses, he sacrificed all his entertainment time.

draw

The reason why the wife lost her temper was not unreasonable, but was exhausted by heavy housework.

Obviously, it's all for this family. Why do you work harder and worse?

The problem is that they have never told each other everything they have experienced, and they have never invited each other to participate in their lives.

One of them kept silent, thinking that the other would understand; One thing has nothing to do with oneself, thinking that life will let nature take its course.

However, the high wall built by silence has already blocked the current between feelings, and "breaking up in discord" seems a foregone conclusion.

When the passion of love recedes and we want to keep love fresh for a long time, we all need a little "sharing desire".

Netizen @ Kobayashi told his love story with the title # Sharing Desire #.

She and her husband have been married for several years, but there is no "seven-year itch" and their feelings are getting better and better.

No matter how busy they are, she said, they all agree to talk about the day before going to bed every week, cooking, running or having dinner with friends.

draw

Kobayashi said:

"As long as we can do something together and say something, the novelty will not disappear."

In fact, sharing seems trivial, but it is a major event to maintain feelings.

When people reach middle age, the days change from the sea of stars to daily necessities.

If you want to fight against dullness, you must learn to tell and listen, so that your feelings will last for a long time in a two-way journey.

draw

draw

The desire to share is the glue of family.

Not only between lovers, but also between relatives can not be separated from the bonding of "sharing desire"

There is such a touching scene in the best-selling book The Shadow Stealer.

The little boy always thought that his parents divorced because he was not good enough, so he fell into deep remorse.

draw

One day, my mother came to him quietly, held his hand and said:

"I want to talk to you about what happened recently ..."

Later, my mother talked about her marriage problems and future life plans.

In addition, she repeatedly stressed that no matter what, parents will love boys as before.

The boy was very moved after hearing this. His mother treated such an important matter as an adult.

The boy hugged his mother tightly, and he decided to live a good life with her.

draw

Imagine that if the mother doesn't open her heart to the boy, the boy may always be unhappy, and the mother can't get her son's understanding.

Sometimes, we always feel that children don't know anything and keep everything from them.

I don't want to talk about the depression in my life, and I'm too lazy to talk about the troubles at work. Even if children are curious, we habitually say "you don't understand".

In fact, children are far smarter than we thought. They not only need care in life, but also need to really participate in their parents' lives.

Only in this way will the parent-child relationship become stronger and stronger.

When people reach middle age, they are old and young.

Not only children, but also elderly parents need to "share".

There is a debate in "Seven Pa Shuo": "If you live in a foreign country and are unhappy, do you want to tell your parents?"

Debater Xi Rui said:

"The so-called family is not you care about me, I care about you?

When one day we feel that these worries are unnecessary, what we erase is the family itself. "

Many times, parents call to ask how you are doing, and all they want is a sense of participation.

True filial piety is to bring parents closer to our lives, let them feel our joys and sorrows and feel the happiness of walking side by side with their children.

The desire to share is the glue of family.

If a family is to be twisted into a rope, it is inseparable from the communication, cooperation and assistance between relatives.

If you want a happy family, you must live like a bridge, connecting you and your family, from parents to children.

draw

draw

The desire to share is the catalyst of interpersonal relationship.

The newcomer show "The Birth of a New Employee", with Douban score of 9.5, is regarded as a treasure by many white people in the workplace.

draw

Among the contestants participating in the program, there are many schoolmasters, rich second generation and elites.

But in the end, it was the most common Li Shixun who was favored by the mentor.

Li Shixun was born in poverty, not in high flyers. His social experience is only working in a convenience store. Why does he stand out?

Well, let's see what his competitors are like first.

Among his opponents, some people pursue perfection, and as long as others stand in their way, they immediately turn against each other;

Some people want to be lonely heroes and refuse to cooperate with their teammates;

Some people are very defensive and don't communicate with others at all.

On the other hand, Li Shixun gives the impression that he has always been easy-going and relaxed.

draw

In the final test, he was paired with Sang Ho Lee, the king of carelessness.

He introduced his experience to Sang Ho Lee to help him improve his attention and avoid making low-level mistakes.

After that, the two worked together as team leaders, adhering to the principle of "making the best use of people" and assigning tasks to each team member.

As a result, their group not only finished the task ahead of schedule, but also became good friends.

After the program, Li Shixun was affirmed. Many tutors are willing to introduce him to work, and some team members want to start a business with him.

Many people say that Li Shixun's greatest achievement is not finding a job, but expanding his circle of friends.

He showed us that when dealing with interpersonal relationships, moderate sharing can help us integrate into the collective as soon as possible and help others.

And many times, helping others is helping yourself.

Blindly shutting others out, for fear that others will learn their own skills, is actually marking time and imprisoning themselves.

The book "Key Dialogue" wrote:

"In actual communication, if you want to be friends with each other, you must learn to share his thoughts and feelings."

If life is Wang Yang, each of us can't be an island.

If you want to open the social situation, you must take the initiative to throw an olive branch; You can't build a car behind closed doors if you want to improve yourself.

Sharing yourself out is not blindly gregarious, but adapting yourself to the environment and integrating into society in sizing up the situation.

draw

People who want to share are the best.

Some time ago, the role of "Zhou Mama" was deeply rooted in the hearts of the people in the hit drama "Human World".

In the era of widespread poverty, every family has its own problems.

But mother Zhou is like a gentle ribbon, which ties the whole family together tightly.

draw

In TV series, there is such a warm scene.

A few years later, Zhou's mother was finally reunited with her husband. That night, she was so excited that she couldn't sleep, pulling her husband and talking nonstop:

"Tell you an interesting thing ..."

After that, she talked about her children's work from interesting things about her neighbors, from inner satisfaction to worries about life.

After listening quietly, the husband said affectionately, "Thank you for your hard work these years."

In fact, not only for her husband, but also for her mother's children and her old sisters.

She never hesitates to share her happiness, and always makes people around her feel warm and hopeful.

And she herself has experienced the hardships of life and gained full friendship and respect.

A doctor of psychology said:

"Through mutual acceptance, care, appreciation, listening and support, feelings can become more positive and energetic."

Life is like an echo wall, it will respond to what you shout.

If you are silent, your world will be silent; If you sing loudly, your life will naturally be full of laughter.

I have heard of a "magnetic field effect": what kind of people you are, you will attract.

You are willing to share your life with others, and others are willing to invite you into life.

In this way, life was opened and life became broad.

People who have a "desire to share" are never bad luck.

"Sharing desire" is so important, how can we have it?

A social butterfly in Zhihu made some suggestions:

(1) Be a conscientious person, pay attention to every bit of life, and let yourself have something to say and stories to tell;

Don't let "I'm sorry" stop your enthusiasm, and don't worry too much;

Behind sharing is care, understanding and recognition. Don't turn sharing into interference, grasp the sense of proportion and measure.

There is a cloud in The Book of Songs:

"Give me a peach, give it to Qiong Yao, and if I don't give it back to you, you will always think it is good."

Isn't it in this interaction that people build relationships and gain feelings?

Life is not easy, you and I are both in a hurry.