Children: All success comes from the warmth of self-study and self-certification

01

"The more roads I travel, the more I like to stay at home;

The more people I meet, the more I like children."——Big Ice

At first, when this book was on pre-sale, I bought it after taking one look at it, probably because of this sentence. But at that time, I had never read the previous books, so I didn’t know that this sentence had appeared in the previous books. It happened to be summer vacation recently, and I read all the books written by Da Bing from beginning to end in one go. After reading the whole series, I realized that it turns out that so much time has passed; it turns out that there have been so many reunions and separations in these years. ; It turns out that we have lost too many people from our past over the years.

In the dead of night, I once lamented that over the years, I know that everything in the world has changed, but I myself have not changed. Is this lack of change a good thing or a bad thing? People who have changed will think you are out, because you are rebelling, you have never made progress, you have always chosen to stay where you were many years ago, and they have gone far away, but I am still where I am.

Just like the author said in the book:

"I had a dream,

In the dream, everyone I knew was there, everyone, The entire playground was filled with smiling faces.

...

All the ideals were achieved and all the regrets were resolved.

All mistakes were forgiven, all love was fulfilled

All,

and all the light came to me. ”

I once had a dream like this. In the dream, I met all the people I had met in life. When I woke up, I found that I had even greater regrets. When did the memories that I worked so hard start to fade away? I know that as time goes by, as we graduate and work, many of us will slowly forget each other, so I used to want to catch it more than anyone else. I hope that we can escape from this law. What happened next? Why did you give up? It was probably the sentence "If you can get it together, just do it." After that sentence, I knew that I should give up.

Over the years, I have learned that my eyesight is not good and I cannot see people accurately. Correspondingly, I am afraid that the decisions I make are wrong. Therefore, when it comes to many choices in life, most of the time I don’t choose. I let the other person choose first. None of us know whether this choice is right or wrong. What I can do is not regret it. Therefore, the right to choose is given to you. After you have made your choice, I will make my choice based on the choice you made. In the end, even if I have regrets, I don’t owe anything.

When I watched "Chen Qing Ling" a while ago, although this drama is not suitable for old aunts like me, when I saw Lan Wangji enter the "Question and Answer" session after drinking, he said , he feels guilty all these years, because he did not stand on Wei Wuxian's side in Evernight. Then I burst into tears listening to these words. Looking back at the past, in many moments of choice and being chosen, I was not the one chosen to be on my side. So, I gradually got used to it.

As the author said: "What can really conquer a person is not giving, but dependence. Everyone needs the feeling of being needed by others." What makes the difference between many of us Dependence disappears just like that, and what comes out is the so-called communication?

02

The author said: "Because I am pessimistic, I seek refuge in the wilderness.

Because I am in a harsh haze, and because I am walking in the dark night, I hope more and more for candlelight, Fluorescence, meteors and lightning.

Because I am pessimistic, I keep writing about the ordinary glimmers of light that ordinary people emit in their ordinary lives. ”

At least, the author did not write a more pessimistic story just because he was pessimistic. Starting from a certain year of life, sadness came too suddenly, so it filled the entire life at that time. There are thousands of reasons why, but I can't find the answer. I always feel that my whole body is only filled with "sadness", and even every breath I take is sad. However, I dare not think nonsense.

It was probably from that time that my mind calmed down, and I could only slowly find the answer by myself. In all my free time, I threw myself into books. Every day and every night, apart from work, the rest of the time is spent reading. Really, people are often afraid of getting into trouble, otherwise they will fall into a whirlpool and swallow you up if you are not careful. This was also the way I could think of to save myself at the time.

I remember that I sent a message at that time, and the content of the message was "I really want to chat with you about life", but I was more afraid of disturbing you, because the problem was too big, and I was afraid of talking about it. An obsession. Digest it slowly, find the answer bit by bit, and finally understand it haphazardly. This is probably human nature.

Just like the story in "Taipei Son", Hiro's choice is a choice that a person with a mature personality would make, but in this world, many people have not matured until they die, and they refuse to grow up. . They present themselves as adults, and then treat others as unreasonably as children. Their words are filled with all kinds of ignorance, but they think they are innocent. In fact, they have all the shortcomings of children, except for their innocence.

It was probably the weirdest thing I had ever seen during that time, so much so that when I saw the same model later, I felt indifferent. When I was young, I was naive and would express in various ways those things I didn't like. I really hate you. The only gain from practicing these years is that my mind has become much calmer, and at the same time it has become much more indifferent. Although sometimes I still regret that those people I knew have gradually become strangers, but I probably feel sorry for myself and continue to go my own way. There is less force and less hurt.

03

The author said in the book: "There are some wonderful laws in the world: helping others often saves oneself, and those who save others also save themselves." Yes, I am trying to save others, hoping that one day I can save myself.

Sometimes I think about the problems I encounter. In fact, for some people, they are only a small part of their lives. For example, Hakka girls, such as the "sister" Yingying in the book, or Tingting, they experienced these things earlier than me, so when they grew up desperately, I still had not evolved, and when they gradually found themselves When I was lost, now, when they can find their own value, I just surface. Maturity has nothing to do with age, but with taking responsibility.

It seems that everyone has to experience disappointment and despair when growing up. If we have never been disappointed, how can we persist in hope?

Just like Tingting, she once could only solve the problems she faced through talking, and later even relied on drugs, but these could not fundamentally solve the problem. It was not until later that she joined a volunteer organization, where she regarded herself as a glimmer of light, helping children who had suffered in Rwanda, a city with a different history, and watching them grow up healthily. Slowly, My heart won't be so anxious. This is probably the legendary "Dujiduren".

Many achievements in life actually come from the warmth of self-study and self-realization. I practice loneliness, and I gain peace; I practice self-discipline, and I gain recognition; I practice principles, and I gain respect. Gradually, many things will be fulfilled naturally. It’s just that sometimes I still can’t help but be greedy and think, if only I had understood it from the beginning.

After reading a whole set of books, I feel that the author's heart is actually full of sadness in a certain corner, just like me a few years ago. Therefore, while the author writes about the tragedy and ruthlessness of the world, he also writes about a group of warm people. It seems to be telling many people that no matter how difficult it is at this moment, no matter how things change, no matter how abandoned we are all the time, if you can, please persevere. There is a lot of foreshadowing in life just to make us think more seriously about its value. . After going through the most difficult times, you will meet what you want to meet.

In the past few years, I have also been trying hard to find a ray of light, a ray of light that can take away the gloom. Maybe some things happen to many people in a common way, so I forgive myself for not being mentally prepared for it back then.

As the book "The Veil" says, "Don't lift the veil of life easily, others call it life."

I saw a picture on Weibo a few days ago, The content of the picture is what Yu Feihong said in an interview with "Thirteen Invitations": "I only discovered when I got older that, really, life itself is a meaningless thing, so we can live it meaningfully. , in fact, it is because it is meaningless in itself, so you try to find some meaningful things to do, or make you feel meaningful, or you are the kind of person who finds the point every day that allows you to live contentedly. Anyway, let's go. It’s been a long journey, and since I can’t advance or transcend our mortal body, I should just deceive myself and live a happier life.”

In fact, the longer I live, the more I understand. Everyone understands that the value of life lies in its meaning. This meaning is not the meaning that others say. It is a kind of determination that allows one to live in the present with peace of mind. It is a kind of "if you are poor, you can be good for yourself, and if you are rich, you can benefit the world." "The cognition is an eternal innocent heart. Just like the lyrics of "Days on Beijing East Road": "In the beginning, we are all children..."

Child, child, I hope that no matter how many years you have been away, you still have a child in your heart. pure and simple. Child, child, no matter what you encounter in life, I hope you can face it with the mind of a child. Children, children, many achievements in life ultimately come from the warmth of self-study and self-certification. My child, may you still be the child you were before.