Tan Dai.

1, a good word warms three winters, and a bad word hurts six winters. -Proverbs

2, to do teeth in the next life, it hurts if someone is unhappy.

If you want to leave when I am down and out, don't come back when I am brilliant.

4. The girl's cell phone at the front desk of early self-study rang, and the sound of reading suddenly exploded around her. Damn it, this is unity! !

5. [Do you like a person? You haven't given up yet. ]

6. When he saw God after his death, God said, "You can't go to heaven for stealing, although it is to treat your wife." He said, "I want to go to hell. I wonder if my wife is okay in heaven? " "She's in hell, too," God replied. "Why? She is a good person! " He was very angry. God said, "She asked me where you would go after I died, and she wanted to be with you. She said that where you are is her paradise. "

7. I can't forget your smiling face, and I can't get rid of the entanglement of memory.

I know everything is not easy.

9. I love the teenager whose smile can warm my whole world.

10, I refuse second-hand love.

1 1. There are only two reasons why you can't attend the class. I have a mobile phone in my hand. There is a Doby next to it.

12, Lao, my red line is broken. Can you put me through?

I only regret one thing. I regret that I didn't meet you earlier, which made you suffer a lot, and I took many wrong paths myself.

14. In fact, everyone feels that they have been hurt by others. So, who hurt who?

15, if you don't want to love, leave, give you back your freedom, and leave my pride to myself. .

16, I am not a customer service staff, and you have no right to ask me to answer this and that.

17, the stage will glow, and the stage will collapse if it is played for a long time.

18, the body is dead without soul, and confidence without behavior is also dead.

19, I want to go back. For nothing else. I just want to see you again.

20. There are no people who can't live without others, only those who don't cherish others.

A short message promoting national unity.

A short message promoting national unity.

1, I play, Liu Xiangxiang laughs; I shot, and Yao Ming gave a thumbs up; Free exercise on platform and vault, football volleyball diving; Swimming, fencing and shooting, weightlifting, race walking and judo; I want to be an all-around player, ranking first in the world.

2. China's martial arts is unparalleled, and it will rank first in the world, with an endless stream of martial artists and world-famous. There are Zhang Sanfeng, martial arts master Huang Feihong, and modern Huo Yuanjia. For example, Lei Guaner has a famous reputation and profound cultural background, and his martial arts career never stops!

3. China has a history of thousands of years, and its four great inventions have enjoyed a good reputation for nine days. More sage thoughts, only for the world to carry forward. Nowadays, with the continuous development of science and technology, high-end technologies are competing for brilliance. As long as we wait for harmony, the world will be moved.

4. Hunan loves spicy food and Shanghai loves soup; Guangdong is called a shower, and Henan goes to a bathhouse; Snow white in the northeast, fly swatter in Hainan; Northwest desert, southeast waves blossoming; Yunnan is good at planting flowers, and Xinjiang is good at planting melons; China has a vast territory and abundant resources, which is enough for you to have a good time.

5. The quintessence of Peking Opera is famous for its beauty, which is long in birth, old age, illness and death, and beautiful in ups and downs. Now the small stage is vicissitudes. China's opera is a unique creation with more diverse repertoires from all over the world. Life is like a person in a play, you sing and I come on stage.

Yunnan is a good place with beautiful scenery and blue sky. It breeds people with aura, 26 nationalities live together, are hardworking and simple, and love to sing. I like that Miao costumes have their own characteristics and wisdom in artistic modeling. I like the Dai water-splashing festival best, and the water-splashing festival is much happier.

7. It has a long history and is well known. Antique calligraphy and painting are still very popular today. Kangxi's colorful blue and white flowers are priceless from generation to generation. Baishi and Tang Bohu are famous for their paintings and calligraphy. Being in an ancient culture, I am moved and encouraged, and I am very proud!

8. The tea fragrance of West Lake Longjing, Tieguanyin and China is clear; Daughter red, attractive, China's wine is alcohol. China's 5,000-year-old culture is a traditional virtue handed down by Wan Li.

9, strong energy is not strong, everywhere. Be strong, be forced, not stubborn, and don't think so long about growing up. Catching is not catching mice, and the earth's crust is not egg shells. Without thinking about it, China culture will never be borderless.

10, write short messages and recite the country. Reciting China and Xinjiang is endless. China has a vast territory and abundant resources for thousands of years. Fifty-six ethnic groups stand at the top. The songs and songs in The Book of Songs are endless. Square Chinese characters have a long history. Children of China, when chanting. Turn this news, I am very healthy!

1 1, Tang poetry is elegant, gorgeous, elegant, elegant and fragrant. With cantata, it flies into the distance, melodious, light and comfortable, flying with songs and everywhere. China's literary talent is always a classic.

12, the desolate battlefield in Mobei, the heroic sons and daughters spread for a long time, the water town in the south of the Yangtze River, and the wonderful articles of talented people and beautiful women. Horseshoe boating in Wan Li, while the ark screams, rivers, lakes and seas are bigger than China, with a long history.

13, 1 month 1 day, firecrackers sounded during the Spring Festival, on March 3rd, wormwood Baba rice, on May 5th, Zongzi was cooked in the Dragon Boat Festival, on July 7th, the Cowherd and the Weaver Girl gathered at the Queqiao Bridge, and on September 9th, we climbed high and sent away to Chongyang, a wonderful national festival.

14, drug name: Zhongyong. Formula: It is a mixture of Taoist cynicism and Confucian positive thoughts according to the ratio of 1: 1. Efficacy: Help people cultivate to the realm of "hiding in the city". People who like to use it: yellow people.

15, the blue sea is Beibei's home, the vast forest is Jingjing's home, the blazing flame is Huanhuan's home, the green grassland is Yingying's home, and the vast sky is Nini's home. The five Fuwa shouted in unison: China-our home!

16, Chinese and foreign festivals ring. Let's think about it. Delicious zongzi Dragon Boat Festival, Moon Cake Festival on August 15th, and Spring Festival on December 30th. Put firecrackers on Spring Festival couplets, dance in new clothes, eat jiaozi on New Year's Eve, pay New Year's greetings on New Year's Day, and have lanterns on the fifteenth day of the first month.

17, promoting national traditional culture, greeting cards have been used for a long time, and ancient doctors used stickers to ask questions. Today, people in China use greeting cards to send letters, to keep in touch with business, and to show filial piety to their children at home. Although there are telephone messages, greeting cards are still difficult to replace.

18, Yunnan is a good place with beautiful scenery and blue sky. It breeds people with aura, 26 nationalities live together, are hardworking and simple, and love to sing. I like that Miao costumes have their own characteristics and wisdom in artistic modeling. I like the Dai water-splashing festival best, and the water-splashing festival is much happier.

19, Beijing 2008, highlighting the sports culture of the motherland: Beibei swims-fast, Jingjing lifts weights-with good results; Huanhuan archery-winning the first place and welcoming long-distance running-takes less time; Nini gymnastics-graceful posture, everyone applauds-cheers. They are all small champions and like to watch the five-star red flag float.

20. It has a long history and is well known. Antique calligraphy and painting are still very popular today. Kangxi's colorful blue and white flowers are priceless from generation to generation. Baishi and Tang Bohu are famous for their paintings and calligraphy. Being in an ancient culture, I feel proud and encouraged!

2 1, the quintessence of China is Peking Opera, which began in the Qianlong period of the Qing Dynasty and merged Hui, Han, Kun and Qin tunes, and spread around the world for 200 years. It is divided into two parts: born clean, ugly to death, good and evil in Facebook, orderly and exquisite, and China culture is hidden in it!

22, 56 families, costumes have their own names, embroidered boots with crested rockhopper, and gold and silver jewelry are beautifully decorated. Foreign friends love to collect one or two pieces at home, which is rich in Chinese flavor and profound in costume culture. The national cultural world is rising!

23. The name of the country of etiquette is widely circulated, and traditional festivals continue to be linked. The first month of the 30th lunar month is New Year's Eve, and the 15th is Lantern Festival. Tomb-Sweeping Day commemorates rain, fog and smoke. Jiaozi on the Dragon Boat Festival is sweet, and the moon cakes on August 15th are round. Long and beautiful festivals are passed down from generation to generation!

24. The blue sea is Beibei's home, the vast forest is Jingjing's home, the blazing flame is Huanhuan's home, the green grassland is Yingying's home, and the vast sky is Nini's home. The five Fuwa shouted in unison: China-our home!

25. China's calligraphy is unique, the cursive script is wonderful, and the connotation is layered and falls together. Chinese culture has a long history, and the four ancient countries have the same style. They are loyal, filial and friendly, and the four seas are harmonious for nine days.

26. For five thousand years, China was great, and the four great inventions spread to the world. Confucianism from ancient times to the present, the sons and daughters of China are United. Qi Xin has been working hard to strengthen China's good reputation.

27. China animation needs to learn more, resist all kinds of civilized rubbish, develop animation industry in China, and reduce people's reckless follow-up. It's useless to close the door. Culture should not be weak. People from all walks of life deeply hope that animation culture can develop rapidly.

28. China's martial arts is unparalleled, ranking first in the world, with an endless stream of martial artists who are world-famous. There are Zhang Sanfeng, martial arts master Huang Feihong, and modern Huo Yuanjia. For example, Lei Guaner has a famous reputation and profound cultural background, and his martial arts career never stops!

29. There are many chinese heritage. Let me talk about our baby. The Great Wall of Wan Li is really nice. Stop foreign invasion, suitable for all ages, and inherit the feelings of Chinese children. Chinese and foreign tourists welcome and praise the working people as the greatest.

30. Taoism is doing nothing but being clean, Mohism is loving and not invading, Legalism is ruling the world, Confucianism is ethics, and Han Fei is a military strategist. The Warring States period was turbulent, a hundred schools of thought contended, and ideas broke out, which was passed down from generation to generation.

3 1, the Chinese characters are amazing, and they are imitated to form calligraphy: the hoof is like official meaning, the lion's head is flying white, the snake fights into strange grass, Youlong is Qin Zhuan, the ox's foot is like eight points, and the muntjac is like small letters.

32. Shenzhou VIII is really great. That's cool, that's cool. Dare to walk in space, Japan and the United States are stupid. * * * Looking forward to the prosperity of the motherland and the flight of science and technology across the sky. One day, the dragon will get water, and the people will be happy.

33. Strong energy is not strong, and * * * is everywhere. Be strong, be forced, not stubborn, and don't think so long about growing up. Catching is not catching mice, and the earth's crust is not egg shells. Without thinking about it, China culture will never be borderless.

34. Cha Sheng Luyu Tea Culture, a "Tea Classics" spread all over the world. A cup of green tea is still unfinished, and gestures are romantic. Meditation and drinking tea can produce saliva, and you can also enjoy the tea ceremony and experience the bitterness and joy of life!

35, Beijing 2008, highlighting the sports culture of the motherland: Beibei swims-fast, Jingjing lifts weights-good grades; Huanhuan archery-winning the first place and welcoming long-distance running-takes less time; Nini gymnastics-graceful posture, everyone applauds-cheers. They are all small champions and like to watch the five-star red flag float.

36. Brilliant Chinese wine culture, China's wine has a good name, and Maotai is noble and elegant; Wuliangye, the famous drama Jian Nanchun, and Fang Shuijing, a little jasper, are the true essence of human beings.

37. The culture of China is like a long river, which is guided by many classic four books. The four classic novels are handed down from generation to generation, and the four love names are said. The four great gentlemen belonged to the Warring States, the four great talents were selected by the Ming Dynasty, the four great composers belonged to the Yuan Dynasty, and there were also many great heroes in the early Tang Dynasty.

38. China's calligraphy is unique, the cursive script is wonderful, and the connotation is layered and falls together. Chinese culture has a long history, and the four ancient countries have the same style. They are loyal, filial and friendly, and the four seas are harmonious for nine days.

39. Gu Wang, Xi's ink dance, proud but not arrogant, Baishi painting shrimp smart but not arrogant; Looking at today, Han Han makes a chapter, talks about the world without hegemony, complements the fourth grade, and is detached from the secular but not vulgar.

40. Feudal civilization lasted for two thousand years, and Confucian culture dominated. There are Six Classics, Book of Songs, Shangshu and Yili, Jing Yue, Zhouyi and Chunqiu. The world respects Confucius and Mencius, the idea of benevolence is widely spread, and the source of Chinese civilization is constant!

4 1, write a short message and recite the country. Reciting China and Xinjiang is endless. China has a vast territory and abundant resources for thousands of years. Fifty-six ethnic groups stand at the top. The songs and songs in The Book of Songs are endless. Square Chinese characters have a long history. Children of China, when chanting. Turn this news, I am very healthy!

42. The Zhuang nationality has a sister, Liu Sanjie, who is smart. Everyone likes her. She is a singer like spring. She is not afraid of power and money. She dares to pursue true love first. In memory of Third Sister's March 3rd, the song is like a surging Liujiang River with a long history.

43. The first day of the first month is the New Year, which is called the first festival in China. Everything is reviving, singing and dancing to welcome the spring, every household is preparing new year's goods, red lanterns are hung high, firecrackers are ringing to bid farewell to the old and welcome the new, and the whole family is happy to gather their loved ones!

44. The name of the country of etiquette is widely circulated, and traditional festivals continue to be linked. On the 30th day of the first month, the Lunar New Year's Eve and the 15th Lantern Festival, Tomb-Sweeping Day pays homage to rain, fog and smoke, and the Dragon Boat Festival dumplings are sweet, and the moon cakes are round on August 15th. Long and beautiful festivals are passed down from generation to generation!

45. Taiji Qingying Wudang Mountain, Shaolin magic is less practiced in the room, and Emei combines rigidity and softness, and comes to Foshan, a holy place in the south. Kung fu is well known. Miss Huo Jiafo Boxing and admire the fairy in the palm. China is a symbol of kungfu, recalling Baiwei Dantian.

46. Strong energy is not strong, and * * * is everywhere. Be strong, be forced, not stubborn, and don't think so long about growing up. Catching is not catching mice, and the earth's crust is not egg shells. Without thinking about it, China culture will never be borderless.

47. Chinese civilization is profound and has a long history. Central Plains culture is moderate and harmonious, bright and magnificent, Jingchu culture keeps a low profile and is brilliant, and Bashu culture and treasures are far away and will last forever!

48. At the end of the year, we celebrate the Spring Festival and congratulate each other on the New Year. The whole family will sit around to eat jiaozi and enjoy a new life. Since ancient times, China has many traditions and harmonious folk customs. * * * I want to be lucky and wish you a happy life.

49. The Zhuang people have a sister named Liu Sanjie. She is clever and alert, and everyone likes her. She is a singer like spring. She is not afraid of power and money. She dares to pursue true love first. In memory of Third Sister's March 3rd, the song is like a surging Liujiang River with a long history.

50. Taoism is doing nothing but being clean, Mohism is loving and not invading, Legalism is ruling the world, Confucianism is ethics, and Han Fei is a military strategist. The Warring States period was turbulent, a hundred schools of thought contended, and ideas broke out, conveying heroic feelings from generation to generation.

Tik Tok's most popular collection of personality talks, girls who love taking pictures, their mobile phones are not bad.

1. Girls who love taking pictures, the mobile phone is not too bad.

I like you as much as the sea. I can't jump into the sea, but I can go to Shanghai.

The world itself is unfair, even the globe is always tilted!

Someone said that he hated me, and I immediately laughed as if I liked you very much.

5. You're handsome and you're a drag, but you're still hanging around in my blacklist.

6. Go your own way, go your own way, and pay less attention to the waste that gossips behind your back.

7. What's the point of falling in love? It's a loss to give up a group of men for a man!

8. I am young and need your advice. I will accept and correct it with an open mind, but I never need your advice.

9. Some people approached noisily, while others left with a smile.

10. A person's happiness is not because he has more, but because he cares less.

1 1. Don't buy useless things, no matter how cheap; Don't depend on people you don't love, no matter how lonely they are. Only by enduring loneliness can we remain prosperous.

12. Simplicity is the soul of wisdom, and verbosity is the decoration of the surface.

13. Because I always feel that good things may not belong to me. If I take them, there will be a price.

14. I really want to care about you, but you just don't get sick.

15. If you can't give me all, then don't give me all.

16. When I get rich, I must pretend to be a beggar and then hire a group of people to throw money at me.

17. If you are a person who is coming and leaving, then I would rather miss you.

18. If you can't tolerate me, it means that you are either too narrow-minded or my personality is too great.

19. You are a potato, and I like it no matter what flavor it is made.

20. You and I are true friends. Look, you've been mentally retarded for so many years, and I'm not leaving yet.

2 1. For love, all rules and regulations are decorations. As long as you can make me feel that chasing you is no problem.

22. I am always worried about who I will lose. Sometimes I wonder if there will be such a person who is worried about losing me.

23. It doesn't matter if you like waves, just don't drown.

24. Call me garbage, but only if you are better than me, otherwise you are even worse than garbage.

25. My true identity is very secret, but my dark circles seem to have exposed me as a national treasure recently.

26. Do you know a person through other people's mouths?

27. In life, later dreams shrink and hopes become thinner.

28. Day, month and year are a lifetime.

29. Never doubt yourself. If you doubt yourself, who can you trust?

30. In your memory, every touch is painful!

3 1. Never please everyone, it will be very attractive.

32. Sleep and play with your mobile phone. Not good for your mobile phone.

Damn it, you're gonna kill me.

One day, I came home from outside, so tired that I fell asleep in bed without taking off my shoes. After waking up, my mother said to me, "You must take off your shoes when you sleep in the future. Do you know that only the dead wear shoes to sleep? " I thought at that time: "If you want to say this, isn't it that most people in our class are dead, sleeping in class and blowing up the bodies after class?"

1. One day, my younger brother in elementary school asked me, "Brother, a box of milk 90 yuan, a box of 6 bottles, how much is a bottle?" I was watching TV and didn't have time to talk to him, so I said, "Oh, just ask the waiter!" " "The younger brother said," Yes, that's what I told the teacher at that time! " "

2. A: I want to confess to a girl. How do I know if she is embarrassed or refuses me? B: this mainly depends on the face! You mean seeing her face change? No, I mean look at your face!

3. One day, my colleague told me: "My sister-in-law lives in my house, kisses me all day, hugs me to sleep in my bed, changes clothes in front of me, and doesn't hide from me at all!" So I decided to go to his house for dinner at night to see if what he said was true or not, and if he was lying to me! When I saw his sister-in-law, I turned to my colleague and said, "You didn't lie to me. Your sister-in-law should be five years old! "

When I was in junior high school, I learned to surf the Internet, and the Internet cafes were full. I thought I would make a fortune by opening an Internet cafe when I grew up. When I was in high school, my classmates often got together and liked to sing K, so I thought, when I grow up, I will open a KTV and definitely make money! When I was in college, I talked about my girlfriend and often went out to get a room, thinking that it would be good to open a hotel after graduation. Oh, forget it. The foreman asked me to move bricks.

I don't have any advantages, but I will comfort people. Many unhappy friends will come to talk to me. No, a female friend came to me gloomily and said, Xiao Mu, I have been in the third year, and I still can't find a boyfriend. Will I be lonely all my life? I looked at her and quickly comforted her: Don't lose heart. Although you are ugly, your heart is still very good and you will meet the right one. It feels good to help a friend. Forget it, the palm print on my face is still burning. ...

6. Lan Yan told me that when he was in college, his family couldn't afford the tuition of 3,000 yuan, and then his mother gambled with the only 1000 at home, and gave him 4,000 yuan the next morning.

7. My friend called me and said that his father-in-law was going to have a birthday and wanted to buy me a birthday present. He asked me what was appropriate. I asked him how much he wanted to spend on it. He replied that as long as 180 yuan. I said, then you can buy two wreaths, 50 yuan 1, two just 100. Now that the price is so high, what can a hundred dollars buy?

8. There was once a classmate who was short and was often laughed at by us. It was not until he got married that we found out that his wife was actually the beauty of the school! Afterwards, we asked him how he caught up. He said that one day he accidentally bumped into the beauty queen in the corridor and put his face on her chest ... Nima, being short also has advantages!

9. "I want to have a barbecue with my friends on the roadside. How can I not be taken away by the urban management? " "Prepare a stack of mingbi, wait for the city management to come over, kneel down and burn paper."

10, arrived at work at 7 o'clock in the morning, saw my colleague's son in the carport, and asked, "Little E, is your mother there?" He said, "I have come." I said, "Really?" The child pointed to a car: "Don't believe me, look at my mother there."

1 1. I have an appointment with my WeChat girlfriend to get a room. After meeting, I was dumbfounded. I finally understood that it was actually just an avatar. . .

12, I was drunk last night. Two boys and a girl sleep together. I fell asleep and was awakened. I found the bed shaking violently and heard the sound. What should I do? So scared! After all, I am a woman!

13, a friend party, a girl brought her boyfriend to attend, and a friend introduced her boyfriend to the indoor lighting equipment adjustment industry. Friends don't know what it is, and they are embarrassed to ask. They all think this is a noble cause. It took a long time to know that it was a curtain seller.

14, the right eyelid is always jumping, which is about to break money. I quickly bought a 10 lottery ticket, and my eyes really stopped jumping. Two days later, my eyelids jumped again and I bought 10 as usual. Good again. I jumped again today and won't buy it again. Still used to failure. I like it.

15, I saw online news today that Nepal was spoiled, and I was puzzled, so I looked aside. No, there are overseas Chinese living in Nepal, which makes me even more puzzled. I looked at one side without understanding. I went to Nepal to evacuate overseas Chinese. Oh, my brain is obviously not enough!

16, the bus suddenly braked and accidentally hit the chest of a sister in front. The sister cursed: "Smelly rascal!" All kinds of eyes in the car ... I was surprised by my IQ and said, "That's enough. I said I would be responsible for what happened last night. " Then the crowd turned to the nun. I was admiring my wit when her boyfriend appeared … anyway, I registered in the hospital …

17, in the evening, my husband hugged me and said softly, "Baby, if I had five million dollars, I would divorce you and marry you smartly!" My eyes are wet after listening to it. Isn't this the happiness I want? I was moved to snuggle up in his arms and said, "honey, that's very kind of you." I must be a girl in the next life and give you a lot of babies! "

18. I saw a beggar with a stereo on the skateboard today. When climbing the mountain, he asked for money. It looks pathetic. The car behind was rude, shouting to let him get out of the way or hit him. Just when everyone blamed the driver, the beggar stood up and left with the board. . .

19, I learned to play mobile phone at my deskmate last night, and I saw it when I was checked by the student union. After the student union left, the deskmate mercilessly pointed to the back of the girl who remembered his name and cursed angrily: Curse you to roll down the stairs and send you to the hospital for an intravenous drip! This morning ... we were all shocked. The girl cursed by her deskmate really fell down the stairs and was sent to the hospital for intravenous drip. It seems that I should be careful with him. Maybe one day he will curse me.

20. I chatted with a neighbor's grandfather in the community yesterday. Grandpa asked me how old I am this year. I said I was in the fourth grade, and now I am an uncle. Next to a junior high school girl, she said, Gao Fushuai is called uncle, but you can only call him middle-aged. Don't stop me, let me cry for a while.

2 1, one day I went to the market to buy a catty of clam, and when I went home to soak, I thought of the story that the snail was cold, so I took a photo with high interest and said, please give me a clam that is cold! After a while, God replied that after knowing you for so long, I didn't realize that you actually like animals. I ......

22. The dormitory next door lives in the Conservatory of Music. Every day, a buddy in their dormitory goes to the toilet to practice his voice (loudly), and passers-by can hear him. Once I went upstairs after buying vegetables, I heard a buddy say: This cargo screams so loudly every day when it hits the plane. That's awesome! I suddenly feel funny, friends, others are practicing their voices, but their skills are not at home.

23. When I was a child, there were many snakes in my hometown. An uncle in our village is best at catching snakes. We saw him walking around. Once, many relatives of my family slaughtered some chickens, bought a big snake and stewed a pot of meat with my uncle. At first, our children only ate chicken and dared not eat snake meat. My aunt even coaxed us into eating it. Just when we were about to say delicious, my aunt came over and said: snake meat.

Yesterday, a woman came to lz store to buy a razor. Lz enthusiastically asked whether to buy it for her boyfriend or for her father! The woman said that it can be used! I think so too. I'm showing her a model. Lz's cell phone is ringing, let her have a look first. After answering the phone, the woman has shaved her armpits and left smartly … leaving me at the counter, I want to say, don't go, I'll give it to you …

25. I quarreled with my girlfriend. In a rage, she packed her clothes and left the door ... I quickly opened the door and tried to drive her away. I saw her running towards me, followed by a puppy ... She finally ran over and hugged me tightly, trembling with fear ... It seems that it is good for neighbors to have puppies. ...

26. In the third grade of primary school, my brother brought back two bottles of foreign wine from work in other places, but my father was always reluctant to drink them. Three friends and I secretly killed it and exchanged soy sauce and water to make it look the same! Not long after, my father took it out to entertain my uncles. When they drank the first cup, my uncle said, what a big soy sauce smell! Dad lowered his head and said nothing. That night, I was beaten for the first time!

27. Me: Dude, I went to Guangdong. Shall I bring you some local products? Dude: No, it's a long way. Me: Nothing. What do you want? Buddy: So ... give me a Honda or a Toyota ... Me: Me, Nima. ...

28. I like truth. Take yesterday as an example. I went to the mall and bought an air conditioner. It says that the minimum power consumption once a year is 8 hours. I picked up my cell phone and photographed it. Waiter, give me one. Daughter-in-law went back to see the electricity meter. Let's turn on the air conditioner for eight hours to see if it only consumes one degree of electricity, right? How much is it now? Waiter, don't go. Where is my air conditioner? Don't go!

29. Mom, I am 15 years old. Can I wear a bra? ""No ""Can I use a napkin? " "no! Absolutely not! " "Why, Mom?" "Son, stop that now. "

30. When I was in college, I walked with a girl at night. Walking, the girl asked me, "I heard that the man's arm span is exactly equal to the woman's waist circumference." Do you believe it? " Hehe, this is a test of my IQ. I said at once, how is it possible? Yao Ming's wingspan is more than 2.3 meters ... No later. Now I think I have a fucking IQ problem!

Editor's note: One day, a friend drank too much and went home to sleep. He felt urgency when he was sleeping, so he got up and opened the door to go to the bathroom. My wife roared, why are you going? My friend suddenly woke up and found himself outside the house, knowing that he had entered the house as the bathroom door. He excused me from going out for a walk and told his wife that she was furious. What is it to go out for a walk in the middle of the night with bare arms and underwear?