Laugh till your stomach hurts. What are the funny jokes?

1. My cousin always borrows money from her brother's piggy bank. Her brother is very angry. One day, she looked around and found a piggy bank in the refrigerator. There is a note in the piggy bank: "Dear sister, I hope you can understand that my assets have been frozen now."

My girlfriend made a sweater for her boyfriend. It's beautiful, and everyone praises it. A few days later, he didn't wear it. When asked why, he said: My girlfriend knitted another one for her puppy with the leftover wool. When walking the dog, someone always says "lovers' clothes".

3. I once went to a friend's house for dinner. During the dinner, I saw that few people moved chopsticks. I said, eat, don't eat shit?

4. Boy: "Sir, I really hope to come again next year to congratulate you on your 99th birthday." Old man: "Young man, you are so young and strong that you should have no problem living until next year."

5. The cow said to the bear: the farmer wants me to plow the fields, the villagers want me to carry goods and pull carts, and the farmers' market wants me to have skin and meat; The stock market wants me to run as hard as I can I've often fallen down recently and I'm at a loss. I just had another bad year, brother. I'll leave the rest to you

6. A supermarket was stolen in the middle of the night, and all the thieves were robbed except shampoo and condoms. So the police came to the conclusion that the thief was an elderly bald man!

7. The boss asked me today, "Do you want a pension?" I said, "Yes!" The boss led me into the finance room, pointed to an old man and said to me, "This is Laojin, please raise it later."

8. Soymilk has been served in the company canteen. At first, everyone loved it, but then the taste became weaker and weaker. Maybe there is too much water, and no one wants to drink any more. So the leftovers are too wasteful, so the canteen changes the soybean milk into boiled water. Nobody drinks boiled water, and nobody drinks it. Boiling water needs fuel, and no one drinks it yet, so the canteen simply doesn't boil water. As a result, there is only one bucket of tap water in the soybean milk bucket. When the boss found out, he said, it's a pity that such a big bucket only contains tap water. Keep some goldfish in it!

Bookstore customer: I want to buy a book. There is no murder, no love, no detective, no millionaire, no young girl. So the boss handed him a train timetable.

10, my mother was mopping the floor, and my father saw it and hurried forward: "How can I do such rough work when I am in poor health?" In the future, you will watch TV in the living room with melon seeds and let others do this kind of rough work. "Then he handed the mop to me watching TV with melon seeds.