Are there any jokes about reading?

1. Once a girl in our class was sitting in the back row listening to the "Walkman", and her ears were blocked, so she spoke loudly. She said to her deskmate, "Let me know when the teacher comes." Almost all the students heard it, even the teacher who wrote on the blackboard was no exception. The teacher looked back at the classmate and said, "I can't go there!" " "

2. On the Mid-Autumn Festival in the second year of high school, the pager suddenly barked during class, and the teacher confiscated it. In the afternoon, the teacher called me to the office and severely criticized me, asking me to write a 2000-word examination. Finally, after the training, the teacher touched the desk with his finger and said, "Take it back." I was dizzy in training. I looked up at a box of beautifully packaged moon cakes on the table (in fact, it was a welfare given to teachers by the school), and I was greatly grateful. I completely forgot my BP machine, grabbed the moon cake and ran ... The teacher came out slowly and let out a sigh. ...

In high school, the first leader of the school had a strong local accent. One day at noon, he said on the school radio: "Rooster Rooster, please call all the roosters to the chicken department office to open the waste." Everyone is wondering, why does the school issue benefits every three days? Later, I learned that the original words should be: notice, please all the staff to the branch for a meeting.

4. During the self-study class, the academic director came in and said to the monitor, "Help me find two people, I want class flowers." So the monitor organized the whole class to vote for the class flower, held a class, and finally unified their opinions and selected the two most beautiful girls in the class. So the two girls went to the director shyly, and the director said, "Come with me to the academic affairs office, I want to move flowers ..."

When I was in middle school, I sat in the last row. I didn't understand English class, so I slept until class was over. Behind me is the back door of the classroom. Every time after class, my deskmate will wake me up and go out to bask in the sun. One day, the teacher asked me to answer questions for the first time. I was awakened by my deskmate when I was asleep, thinking that class was over, so I got up and opened the back door and walked out of the classroom. Three minutes later, I felt something strange outside the classroom and rushed back to the classroom, only to find all the teachers and students panicked. ...

6. In high school, after class was over, all the students went outside to buy lunch boxes. A girl took a shortcut to get there before others. The manhole cover in front was not covered properly and she fell! After a while, she climbed up with the edge of the well. She was embarrassed. A group of junior high school students walked by in horror. She was in a hurry and said as she climbed, hey! It's really hard to fix. ...

7. Two boys go to the canteen to eat. It's a pity that a couple are sitting next to each other, very much in love, feeding each other. The two brothers couldn't stay any longer, but they didn't say anything. Soon, the couple took the initiative to leave. It turned out that the two brothers also began to feed each other bite by bite. ...

8. When I was in junior high school, one day at the student assembly of the whole school, the head teacher wanted the Sports Commission to check whether the girls at work were there. He said to the sports committee (a lecherous boy), "Go and tidy up the girls in the class." The sports committee member was flattered and asked in a low voice, "Kiss first … which one?" The teacher thought for a moment and said, "According to the student number, of course!"

9. In the fifth grade of primary school, my classmates and I went out for breakfast. While we were eating, a dog ran to a classmate and wagged its tail. He looked at the dog for a long time and said, "Call Dad, I'll give it to you."

10. The teacher asked a boy who was sleeping in class to answer this question. The boy did not answer. When he was embarrassed, the girl behind quietly told him the answer, but the voice was a little louder and the teacher could hear him. So the teacher said, "I know there is an unknown woman behind every successful man, but it seems a little early now." Everyone was in an uproar.

1 1. The president of a university faces a problem: some girls who love beauty often print their lips on the mirror when applying lipstick in the bathroom. He finally figured out a way to stop the problem before it got out of control. So he called all the girls wearing lipstick and asked them to meet in the bathroom at 2 pm. In the afternoon, in front of many girls, the headmaster instructed the cleaner to take out a long-handled brush, put it in the toilet with water, and then went to the mirror to start scrubbing. Since then, no one has left lip prints on the mirror.

12. There is an American student John in my Chinese class. He is very interested in Chinese characters. One day, John came back from the street and found my office: "Teacher, I think you China people are very modest." "Why?" I'm surprised. "In the street, I saw many big signs boasting about themselves, such as: China is good, China people are good, China agriculture is good ..." He regarded "silver" as "very good".

13. In primary schools, students all take the teacher's words as guidelines. I remember that when the first-grade Chinese teacher came into the classroom, he dipped his hand in saliva, opened the textbook with a "wow" and cleared his throat: "Students, today we are teaching the first lesson, please open your books." We stared at the teachers one by one, and some students put their fingers into their mouths and dipped their tongues blankly before turning over the books. ...