Single quotations are funny.

Funny single quotes

Funny is generally used to make people laugh by popular means. In many cases, comedians use very direct means to make people laugh. Funny can also make people feel the true meaning or philosophy of a certain life in laughter. The following is the funny content of the single quotation I compiled. Welcome to read it for reference.

1. Don't kill yourself while you open your maw to me and wave your claws.

2. Don't hide the skin but not the meat!

3. It doesn't matter whether you love or hate, as long as everything doesn't matter.

4. I light a cigarette, but I smoke loneliness.

5. The sign of immature men is that they can make heroic sacrifices for their ideals, while the sign of mature men can live lowly for their ideals.

6. Traditional men are very pure before marriage, and then they start screwing around. Modern men mess around before marriage and become honest after marriage.

7. Nowadays, tutors are not called tutors or bosses, but scientific research contractors!

8. I drank to drown my pain, but this damn pain learned to swim.

9. It may not be the enemy who shits on your head, but it may also be your neighbor upstairs.

1. Prices are rising so fast that I always pay in advance when I eat in restaurants.

11. Life is a chess game. I am willing to be a pawn. Although I am slow, who has ever seen me take a step back?

12. People are not smart, and they are bald like others.

13. If I can forgive your vulgarity, can you tolerate my compulsion?

14. When arguing, the difference between a man and a woman is like the difference between a rifle and a machine gun.

15. As long as you dare to die, I dare to bury it.

16. Use your 2B pencil to describe your life.

17. Things are often like this, and it's too late to turn back. Even if you are willing to be a bad horse, there may not be a returning grass waiting for you.

18. I always treat handsome guys and money like dirt, and they always treat me like this.

19. If anyone uses a honey trap on me, I will play along with it.

2. Be brave to admit your mistake and never change it.

21. After studying for more than ten years, it is better to mix in kindergarten!

22. Crying about how much he loves you, maybe you don't even believe yourself.

23. If one day I become a hooligan, please remind me that I was once innocent.

24. I can give up my choice, but I can't choose to give up.

25. Life is like an angry bird. When you fail, there are always several pigs laughing.

26. Everyone is original when he is born. Sadly, many people gradually become pirates!

27. Success is an idea, getting rich is an obligation and happiness is a power.

28. Before I met you, my world was black and white. After I met you, wow, it was all black.

every time I cram for the Buddha's feet, the Buddha always gives me a kick.

3. The little girl selling flowers took me by the hand and said, Big Brother, buy flowers. I can tell you are a playboy at a glance.

31. The night gave me a pair of black eyes, but I rolled my eyes with them.

32. I once looked back and smiled, which fascinated the teacher.

33. If you can't tell the tutor clearly, then confuse him!

34. If I'm drunk, I won't obey anyone, so I'll hold the wall!

35. I used to like her broad mind, but it was nothing more than an airport!

36. There is no rehearsal in life. Every day is a live broadcast.

37. The highest level of work is to watch others go to work and get their wages.

38. Teacher, I met a robber and my homework was robbed.

39. You can't believe any news until it is officially denied.

4. I am in Jianghu, but there is no legend about me in Jianghu!

41. I put 1, vows in a machine gun and fired at you. You fell in a pool of blood, covered with Cupid bullets!

42. Teacher, you wait, and I will let the Buddha marry you!

43, no matter how good Chopin of B is, I can't play the sadness!

44, it is said that the corner meets love, TMD, when I was not careful, I was hit by a car when I turned the corner!

45. Now you scold me because you don't know me yet. When you know me later, you will definitely hit me.

46. Mixing entertainment circles is like playing mahjong. If you want to be a big name, you have to give up a pot of chicken!

47. When a man meets a woman, there is only an anniversary from now on, and there is no independence day.

48, explanation is cover-up, cover-up is dishonesty, dishonesty is lack of cleaning up!

49. Love without the purpose of marriage is playing hooligans.

5. With your understanding ability, you may not understand what I have explained, so you can continue to be vague.

51. It's not that I look down on you, but that I don't care about you at all.

52. Being angry is to punish yourself with other people's mistakes.

53. Stand up when you fall, change your posture and then fall.

54. Don't propose to me. I will say yes as soon as I propose.

55. I never go upstairs because there is an elevator.

56. I couldn't outrun that BMW after all, so I just watched it go away in the sunset. It wasn't my engine that was bad, but my chain fell off.

57. When is the time to embrace each other? Yang is watching the fun.

58. Take a newspaper to the toilet. I am a scholar.

59. Sometimes the killer of marriage is not an affair, but time.

6. Don't talk to me about ideals, ok? I quit!

61. Women are divided into two types: married and unmarried, and men are divided into two types: voluntary marriage and forced marriage.

62. For me, living is a compromise to God.

63. The boy I once loved had the most handsome back in the world.

64. At least I wear glasses. How can I flirt with a good woman?

65. Is the leaf leaving because of the pursuit of the wind or the tree's persistence?

66. Xiaoming and Xiaohua went to the zoo to play. When they entered the door, Xiaoming pointed to Xiaohua and said to the doorman, "Look carefully! Come out later, don't say I stole the your monkey! "

67. When I love you, I am what you say. What do you say you are when I don't love you?

68. I've been waiting for your news for a long time, and all I got was a haha, XX as a joke.

69. There are not many ladies in the world, but there are many who pretend.

7. Since I have been deleted, there is no need to add it back. There is not much more than you, and there is not much less than you.

71. Similarities between wives and computers: We can't understand the communication language between computers at all.

72. I swallowed a XX, and the world immediately became sexy.

73. It is difficult for a rich man to have no money.

74. The man riding a white horse is not necessarily a prince; he may be the Tang Priest. It's not necessarily an angel with wings, mom said. It's a bird man.

75. I have to tell my son a lot of sermons every day, just to make him understand that people like me who preach sermons all the time will not be successful.

76. Don't eat what's in the bowl, just hold the pot and eat it.

77. I am poor, so please don't rob the tomb!

78. Drink medicine, pass the bottle, hang yourself on the rope, and the person who jumped off the building waved a handkerchief to see him off.

79. A person's life is like taking a shit. Sometimes you have worked hard and all you can get out is a fart.

8. Money is not the problem, but no money! ;