Joke: How to overclock website editor _ Laugh till your stomach hurts _ Laugh till your girlfriend is happy.

CPU overclocking used to be defined as the operation of adjusting the clock speed of the processor chip to slightly higher than the factory frequency. In the past, in the small space of 6- 12 square meters in traditional media such as newspapers and magazines, few guys wearing reading glasses climbed the grid to improve their speed. With the birth of the second generation CPU IT, overclocking from a relatively rarely used hardware improvement has become the biggest hobby of website CEOs. In particular, the historical peak of Nasdaq index has aroused people's strong interest in listing, which is still puzzling. It is famous because it can increase wealth and stupid astronomical figures at the same time, and it is cheap and painless (for the sake of BOSS, of course). Since then, overclocking technology can be applied to almost all types of IT personnel, but perhaps no one is more legendary than my website. They can run at 203% times the frequency of the factory, which is unrealistic for most blue-collar workers who join the union. anyway/no matter what/ in any case ...

You may or may not know that website editing is a gold mine that can be overclocked. There are sufficient technical and economic reasons for this statement:

1, the depressing plunge of Nasdaq index provides a silent gospel for overclocking: delisting (being fired) without overtime; In his latest speech "High-tech Industry Should Calm Down" in Seattle, Gates, the leader of Wulin League (who may have been hit by the ceiling debris caused by the earthquake), supported Inter Milan with the new SSE(Stock So Easy) technology. The manufacturing process of 0. 18 micron has a loose voltage requirement, and website editors set the default belt voltage to 1.5 volt, which is enough for them to refrain from complaining.

2. Overclocking from 8: 30 a.m. to 5: 30 p.m., or overclocking from 9: 00 a.m. to 6: 00 p.m. (using the least supercilious cooling measures and auxiliary programs to monitor private messages) has an amazing success rate. Of course, there should be a super fan in the middle and more oil and peanut oil.

3, the most important thing is silver! As long as it accounts for about one-fifth of the salary of the cleaners in the Pentagon, such a poor price can achieve amazing results ―― for example, you can use one person to do three jobs and pay half the money. Of course, companies sometimes have to pay extra for weekend dinners, but compared with the price gap between them, this difference in cost performance is negligible.

4. To sum up, the editors of overclocking websites must be determined to win. With the least effort and investment, we can easily improve the update speed of articles and databases, sit down and relax, and look at the unusually high myopia index (638,708,850 Hz) on the wCPUID window. In addition, you can choose to use a slightly special cooling device, which will be introduced here to give full play to my potential:

First of all, explain the humidity and dew phenomenon to illustrate the necessity of refrigeration equipment:

In the past, the glory of internet stocks and now the junk state of falling below one yuan, this strong contrast between hot and cold makes my eyes wet and tears condense into a big threat to the image of the website. It may cause the system to shut down or commit suicide by short circuit (I heard that my suicide is calculated at the speed of GB and ATA 100, which usually happens in the elevator closest to the personnel office after receiving a large envelope).

In order to prevent this from happening, before the formal refrigeration, we should coat it with polyurethane, restrict them from browsing websites and forums with stock keywords, and prohibit them from talking about any topic of failed online dating and imperialist capital market with OICQ. Generally, two or three layers of liquid can keep warm, so it is necessary to pay special attention to the installation of all-rubber walls and hand-washing dishes in the bathroom to prevent your veins from being cut by porcelain tiles.

In addition, according to the report released by the US Securities and Exchange Commission on Thursday, Microsoft co-founder Paul? Allen sold 5.5 million shares of the company's common stock in February. Allen sold its shares at a price of 6 1.69-64.38 USD per share from February 2 to February 7. At the end of February, Allen directly owned 65,438+038,438,282 shares and indirectly owned 55,742 shares. Therefore, it is necessary to hold lectures on a regular basis, revealing that the decline of online stocks was caused by the massive selling of Microsoft shares by paul allen, the former partner of Gates. Everyone agreed to pack Paul into an XBOX and throw it into the Atlantic Ocean. The plan will be printed with the latest officeXp, and everyone has a copy. Who is the idiot's salary to send papers today? )

After the preparatory work is completed, we will get down to business and introduce the cooling tools.

1, standard general refrigeration equipment: stock aluminum water block, also known as golden handcuffs (of course, it is gold-plated, otherwise the boss will sign it for reimbursement to the planning department) is widely used all over the world because it easily makes us complacent and daydream-the size of this special aluminum main radiator is invisible, but its strength and length are enough to support many people to work hard until retirement. Everyone will be provided with a calculator marked FU*K for calculating the P/E ratio of the stock, and the theme song of Titanic will be played as background music during the calculation (chief accountant, remember to make an invoice, and the fee will be deducted from the salary at the end of the month. )

Because of this long-term effective cooling design without additional maintenance, my second generation can run in a much higher temperature environment than the older generation.

2. Additional special cooler: As mentioned above, my heart rate can be easily pushed to 70 beats/minute without hardware and salary support, using the tool program that you are about to be fired. However, if we want to overclock the megahertz above G, we need to overclock the heart rate to 95 beats/min with a very cool boss's daughter, and every time the boss's daughter appears, we use cpuburn (an application similar to other cpu testing tools, such as SETI @ HOME, RC5 Client, 3D Rendering, Prime95, etc. ), the test results show my speed efficiency.

The attached picture shows my II generation tied to a mouse with a network wheel. Did you see that guy's glowing eyes and saliva? Of course, I overclocked this until midnight 12 PM Hz, using professional Miss Internet champion cooling equipment. Obviously, this is something that ordinary IT websites may not be able to do. After all, it is really hard to meet in today's network dinosaur era. If you want to try it, you must remember that there are many similar MM cooling systems. You should choose the most suitable scheme according to the budget to achieve the purpose of overclocking.

Attachment is the description of system platform parameters.

CPU: I am the second generation (I want to identify Harvard, like Tsinghua, which punched holes in the packaging of Mata in six Shandong provinces and on both sides of the Yellow River, and 3. 15 consumer day anti-counterfeiting labels)?

Motherboard: IT elite 8 10 RMB (real 8 10 motherboard, please refer to the exchange rate between RMB and USD of the bank on that day for specific technical parameters).

Memory: You are the immediate executive type of history.

Graphics card: Don't look at me like that. Committed to the second generation.

Optical drive: 99-speed timeout (cool finger technology with urine control function)