Osamu Dazai's Girl Puppet: A 30-year-old man who knows girls.

This is a novel that makes me feel strongly that I have something to write after reading it. I used to avoid reading foreign works for fear that I could not perceive the charm of the language of the works because of translation. But I like every word in this book! I believe that if Osamu Dazai was from China, he would use Chinese characters in this way-almost a girl's sensitive and thoughtful expression.

About him, Osamu Dazai, I care more about his own experience than my thinking about his works. This is my psychology before I saw "Disqualification of the Earth". It seems that I am more fascinated by his suicide and his marginal character. No matter who he is, so is the fictional character "Qingzhao" in Anne Baby's Lotus. Maybe his life is too regular.

I have always scoffed at the idea of reading "Disqualification on Earth" and reading famous works. I am ashamed that I didn't realize that despair. Now I can't remember what I read, "Disqualification on Earth" and "Flower of the Clown", which are the only article titles I remember in that book.

Nevertheless, one thing I think about him has not changed from beginning to end. There is such a scene in every article of his that is consistent with my view of him. In this regard, I firmly believe that no matter what kind of novel characters, there is a role to please others, whether it is the "I" who tells jokes to please classmates, the little girl among the female students I mentioned now, or the female teacher inside. While pleasing others, I hate that I can't be myself, so I have always been confused.

So every time I encounter such a plot, when words can't vividly convey that feeling, I always think of a movie "The Life of Abandoned Pine Nuts" that I have seen for a long time, which makes me feel very uncomfortable. In order not to appear so lonely, we have been trying to please others. Why are we doing this? Because we want to possess this person too much and love this person too much!

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Returning to the book Female Students, I decided to read this book. I was completely attracted by a sentence in a book posted by a netizen in topic circle, Weibo. It's like finding someone who can pry into your heart and express only to you. He won't tell anyone, but he understands you.

Read the whole book (girls are the longest novels selected from this book, as well as other short stories, all written from a female perspective. ), especially "Student Girl", I really can't imagine that this book was written by a 30-year-old man (according to Osamu Dazai's life record at the back of the book, this book was written when he was 30). Its delicacy and sensitivity make girls feel pity for girls!

I especially remember a detailed expression, "No way, Teacher Ito is such an idiot. I didn't even know there was a pattern of Bai Yutang embroidery on my underwear." The story happened when "I" got a retro umbrella and Mr. Ito, an art teacher, wanted to draw my posture for the exhibition.

Seeing this, I was suddenly moved inexplicably! Even if I later found out that the novel "Female Student" was from a diary sent by a female reader to Osamu Dazai, I still couldn't imagine a man writing so attentively from a female perspective! How sensitive and fragile such a person should be!

There are many such expressions in the book. In addition to all Osamu Dazai's works I mentioned above, there is one thing related to the image of Osamu Dazai himself: about life and death.

I still remember a story about life in Osamu Dazai, which touched me from the beginning. 2 1 year-old, I met the bar girl Langtanabe in Ginza and the coast of Yaoyue Town in Kamakura, and Tanabe died, but I survived. This kind of psychology is also described in Disqualification on Earth. From then on, Osamu Dazai had a tendency to commit suicide until he was 39 years old and threw himself into the river with a female reader.

Therefore, regarding Osamu Dazai's description of life and death, most people will define his whole personality as negative and pessimistic because of his sentence "I'm sorry for being born". But I don't know how much a sensitive person actually loves the world in his bones!

He also thought of death. "If I suddenly want to get sick, if I can get seriously ill, let a lot of sweat wash my whole body like a waterfall and make my body thinner, maybe I can become pure and clean. Maybe as long as I live, I can't escape this fate."

This is the girl he wrote. Death seems to be a relief for growing girls, but here I prefer to understand it as Osamu Dazai's pursuit of "truth" and "innocence".

"I want to die this winter, but I recently got a set of hemp kimono with mouse gray pinstripes, which is suitable for summer, so I'd better live until summer."

"I love this world!" I thought with tears in my eyes. Staring at the sky, the sky changes slowly and turns blue gradually. I keep sighing and want to take off my clothes. At this moment, the leaves and grass became transparent and their beauty disappeared. I touched the grass gently. I really want to live beautifully.

Such a person who cares so much about the details of life, loves life so much, and experiences life with every sensitive nerve, will he not want to live unless he is completely desperate?

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Before writing this article, I read this "female student" again. Every time I read this, I want to say to a 30-year-old man: "Happiness comes a night late, but it will come eventually!" "